Flourishing goes beyond happiness and satisfaction with life. True, people who flourish are happy. But that's not the half of it. Beyond feeling good,they're also doing good- adding value to the world.
Barbara Fredrickson (note: I did not take this quote from any course material but from "quote fancy" on line)
Languishing or Flourishing?
Are you languishing or flourishing? Are you feeling , blah! unmotivated, defeated, purposeful less and just going through the motions of Life (which would be languishing) or are you feeling enthusiastic, excited, hopeful, and full of Zest for Life (which would be flourishing) ? Well the New York Times took on both of these definitions in an attempt to help individuals understand why they were feeling less than happy during the pandemic and ways to feel better...They provided ways ( see links to self tests) to determine if you were languishing or flourishing, and then helpful tips on how to go from languishing to flourishing. I also learned a lot about flourishing and how to get there, in my course, but because it is a " positive" psychology course I did not learn a lot to date about "languishing". Still...one of the reasons I decided to break the bank and take it is because I want myself and my loved ones to "flourish"! I am so tired of languishing.
Weighed Down
I have been languishing for quite some time, and though the pandemic was only partially responsible for the weight on me, I did have weight. In the poem below I wrote about having a heavy -weighted -blanket- on- me- experience.
Ironically, I was both appreciative of the pandemic because it allowed me to stay in a comfort zone which weighted blankets are for, giving me an excuse for not being productive 'out there', putting me on par with everyone else for a brief refreshing time, but it and all the other things I was dealing with also weighed me down. I don't feel light, and energetic and care free...I just felt heavy...and with this recent bout of cardiac symptoms I feel even heavier. I feel I am languishing big time.
From Languish to Flourish
One of the tips, offered in the articles, for taking ourselves from languishing to flourishing is to savor moments instead of looking for big highs. That, as one of my long time go-to philosophies of Life, was something I had been doing and continue to do. It does help. I savored a moment just this morning, as the poem below also expresses.
Of course, gratitude, doing good deeds, serving and connecting to community are all beneficial as well. And those are all things I do .
I fear, though, that I am not "serving" the needs of others enough even though that is all I seem to be doing lol. Everyone's needs come before my petty little needs, it seems...and as the "my" in "my needs" become less and less important ...I just do it automatically ...but am I doing enough "measurable" service outside my loved ones? Am I doing enough good in the world? I don't know. Need to look at that.
Anyway, have a read and see where you are at.
All good.
The New York Times/Dani Blum ( May 6, 2021) The Other Side of Languishing is Flourishing. Here's How to Get There. https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/04/well/mind/flourishing-languishing.html
The New York Times/ Adam Grant ( December 3, 2021) There's a Name for that Blah You Are Feeling: It's called Languishing. https://www.nytimes.com/2021/04/19/well/mind/covid-mental-health-languishing.html
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