Truly, truly I say to you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it dies alone; but if it dies, it bears much fruit. Whoever loves his life loses it, and whoever hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life.
John 12: 24-26 ESV
Hmm! Now that is a potent piece of wisdom and it has a lot to do with what I have been pondering today. We truly do need to let go of many of our notions, don't we, if we want to be happy and free? We need to let go of a lot of stuck stuff within us, that are consequences of these notions of us as separate little beings. We need to stop clinging to the illusion of life, we perceive when we see ourselves as individual grains of wheat. We need to be willing to let the ego die for it isn't real and what we gain from letting go of it, from "dying onto self", is freedom .
As Deepak Chopra reminds us in his translation of the Yoga Vasisthas, Be firmly rooted in the non-existence of the ego...which is the individuality, the apparent grains of wheat we come to see ourselves as. All just a notion that prevents us from bearing the fruit we are here to bear.
What are these fruit that we bear when we are willing to let go of our mind's never ending attempt to create and cling to the life we love and when we are willing to die (mentally surrender to Life and whatever she unfolds in front of us)?
The Vasistha answers that question:
Mental distraction and distress cease, just as the ocean becomes calm when the wind ceases to agitate its surface. There arises self-knowledge within and the realization of truth puts an end to the perception of the world illusion. Infinite consciousness alone shines. There is an experience of bliss, not granted to the ignorant, who are full of desires. Even as shoots may emerge from burnt leaves, a new life may emerge from this. However, he who would avoid entanglement in delusion,once again rests in self knowledge.constantly. Such are the fruits of your absence, o mind, and there are countless others.
Say what crazy lady?
When we stop listening to the mind, following it here and there and everywhere and rest in the quiet Self (Infinite Consciousness) below its surface, we are no longer "bothered" "perturbed", thrown around like waves on an agitated ocean. We are not so screwed up. We get out of Life's way and we simply enjoy the experience of whatever we are offered moment by moment. We do not react. We do not judge. We do not grasp or cling to that which the ego mind says is pleasant, distracting and non triggering to any memory we store inside. And we do not push away that which is triggering, that which allows pain to emerge. We do not stuff down and are finally freed of all the stored "junk" inside us, making room for things to blow right through. We accept it just like we accept the wind blowing across our faces. Without ego, there is no judging of pleasant or unpleasant, of grasping, clinging or pushing away. When we truly realize Self, and rest there when the wind blows, we remain at peace. More than that, we can experience a bliss that the ego-dominated mind could never give us. The only condition is...we must constantly, constantly practice keeping ourselves free from the tangles ego can wrap us in. We must constantly be mindful and on guard. Every moment of every day...we must chose the Deeper Self over the "little self", Infinite Consciousness over our puny little minds. We must drive the vehicles we are in and not allow mind to...because as soon as we take our hands off the wheel...the mind will drive us into the ditch, and we may find ourselves lost in ego once again.
Still doesn't make a lick of sense?
Once again, I will encourage you to listen to Michael Singer. I love the way he teaches and explains things like this because it takes "spirituality" out of the conceptualization of being "woo-woo" and makes it a very practical and rational necessity. He reminds us simply that we have a mess inside our heads and it is up to us to clean it up. It isn't what Life is doing but what we are doing in response to Life that causes our so called "problems" and "mental distraction and distress". The mess comes from a tendency we have, as humans, to repress, suppress, push away, deny that which we "judge" as painful. Maybe we had some childhood trauma, lost some loved ones, were sick or whatever and instead of dealing with it, instead of allowing it to flow through us like all energy is supposed to do...because it was so painful we learned early on to push it down. So we may now have a lot of stored negative energy within us. It gets in the way of a natural flow of peace and bliss, blocking it.
We Made the Mess; We Need To Clean It Up
When we do not see ourselves as responsible for this mess...we are constantly going to be "looking out there" for ways to feel better and to prevent this mess from being triggered by more pain. This is what the ego dominated mind tells us we must do and we listen. So we learn to grasp and cling to the "pleasant", that which distracts us and eases the pain...and we push away the unpleasant, that which will add to the pain or make it come up to the surface where we don't want it. All our mental energy goes to searching for things to make us feel better and anticipating and being on guard against things that will make us feel worse. We begin to attempt to manipulate life and others in any way we can so that we are not bothered.
This is how most of get through our days. This is away of living that is considered "normal" It leads to a hyper-alert, busy and restless mind. It leads to some pretty messy insides. . Michael Singer, a business man, asks us to do a cost analysis on our plan of action. When we do we see that what we get in turn for our effort is 100% cost ( making us sick and crazy) and 0% benefit, ( at the end of the day we are far from happy and our minds are still a mess. ) All that energy and effort and does it work ? No...it creates more distress, more stress and more of a desire to distract. It takes us farther and farther away from Self realization and truth which is truly the only way to happiness.
What do we have to do then?
Stop doing what we are doing. Stop listening to the ego dominated mind. In fact, let the ego die. Stop grasping and clinging. Stop pushing away. We need to stop getting in the way of Life and just let Life be Life as we experience it all.
We need to be willing to take responsibility for our mess and make a committed effort to practice everyday to do things differently. We need to make a clean insides the most important goal in our lives.
What does that have to do with the mess inside our heads?
We need to purge; we need a good thorough cleaning of our insides. We need to get all that stuff out of us that is in the way of allowing the natural peace and bliss to flow. Now some of that stuff is pretty deep seated and entangled so it's best to practice with all the experiences we have going on around us now and to learn to stop reacting to those. Like the person driving too slow ahead of you, the unexpected bill you just got in the mail, the less than nice comment your coworker made about you etc. Just practice noticing how these make you feel, allow those feelings to come in, try to re-frame them more positively ...like "Maybe there was some truth to what she had to say, I will look at it. But this is her opinion and I am not her opinion." ; anchor self with breath; and find that true Self beneath the mind and anchor yourself there. Relax there and observe and experience the situation from that place where the wind can't reach you.
Practice this constantly.
Every moment, every situation offers us an opportunity to learn how to open and clean out our insides.We want it all out! We do not want to add more junk to the pile we have stuffed...so we need to let these new experiences to blow through us. We need to remain open to them. And if we continue to practice moment by moment, eventually the stuff stored inside will just come out naturally and when it does, the energy of peace, bliss and Love will begin to flow up through us the way it is meant to.
Hmm! There is so much to this truth, this realization it is challenging to get it all down in one sitting.
All is well!
Deepak Chopra & Adam Plack (2011) The Secrets to Healing. Spotify
Michael Singer Podcast/Sounds True (April, 2022 ) S2 E4: Taking Care of Your Inner environment https://resources.soundstrue.com/podcast/s2e4-taking-care-of-your-inner-environment/
Google Books: The Concise Yoga Vasistha https://books.google.ca/books?id=IbqFcTyGlEgC&pg=PA244&lpg=PA244&dq=Be+firmly+rooted+in+the+nonexistence+of+the+ego&source=bl&ots=086-QtMMAJ&sig=ACfU3U0Cuepyj2CeGNR26LkKfFLUG_5b2g&hl=en&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwiKxI2dvIf4AhUlQjABHfgWApIQ6AF6BAgjEAM#v=onepage&q=Be%20firmly%20rooted%20in%20the%20nonexistence%20of%20the%20ego&f=false
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