You need to breathe with emotion.  You don't breathe it away.
Pema Chodron How to Meditate

I woke up this morning thinking about my propensity towards negative thinking.  For the most part...I seem pretty positive ...I really do not complain that often though I do complain enough to make keeping this bracelet on one wrist a bit of a challenge.  Of course, others will tell me when they see me switching wrists, "That's not a complaint!".  I respond by explaining that to me it is...there is still a hint of negativity under the surface of my words.  

Going From Negativity to Confidence

Maybe like me, you too want so desperately to get beyond that and have complete faith and confidence in Self and Life, to feel that "power at the depth of who you are"? To be positive in your thinking and your manifesting.  ( Eckhart Tolle)

What holds us back from feeling that?

Of course, what is true for me may not be true for you.  I do have this core belief that I get stuck on that "bad things are going to continue to happen" and when things seem to be going right, "they will not last" .

Is that negative?

It sounds so negative...yet this is based on absolute truth, is it not?  What we call "bad things"...those that bring "unpleasant" feelings are going to come and go through the remainder of our years....and I don't care who you are.  The things that bring pleasant feelings will not last either....no matter how we try to cling to them.  So this core belief ...based on the  reality of life...that makes us label ourselves as pessimistic, can not be the source of our suffering, can it?  

Hmmm...maybe the source of our suffering is not so much that we accept this truth as our reality but that we beat ourselves up for accepting it.

Huh?

Beating Ourselves Up

"I should be more positive."  "What is wrong with me, why do I think bad things are going to keep happening?" "why am I not full of hope?"  "I am creating these bad things with my negative thinking...I better stop the thinking now before I  make things worse."

I know I think these thoughts and I don't have "pleasant" feelings when I think them. I fear and feel somehow bizarrely responsible for every bit of suffering I experience and that those around me are experiencing ...like I am doing it all with my thinking and believing therefore manifesting that unpleasant feelings will come, pleasant feelings will go. Yet I am only thinking the truth.

I judge myself as "wrong", "weak", "to blame" for suffering when I am not "pollyannish" . I look about my life and see all the  "challenging situations" that keep showing up as proof of my negativity  and inability to be more positive.   I have taken the things I learned about the law of attraction, and turned it against myself.  I know this isn't healthy.

Acceptance: the opposite of Desiring to MANIFEST?

So to compensate...I will often go in the complete opposite direction...I will stop wanting, stop desiring those things I believe will bring pleasant feelings and prepare myself to accept and endure the unpleasant. I don't live in the beauty of the present moment because I am in survival mode, preparing and waiting for it to get even more difficult by building up my peace with what is muscles.

The Peace With What Is Muscles

And we all should be building those  muscles, don't get me wrong,  but we also need to focus on all the beauty and blessing and life in this moment...not just on waiting to deal with things when they go wrong.  We also have to be okay with wanting more.  To desire may be the foundation of craving but it is also the  foundation for Living. Without desire, which can be translated from Latin to mean "away from our star" we would never seek awakening.

Of course...our seeking may be misguided toward grasping for substitutes rather than the real thing we want which is connection to Source...and this is addiction...but to desire to be happy and joyful and for   the things  or circumstances we are quite sure will bring it to us in a healthy, non destructive way is okay...in fact ...it is necessary.  We need to desire in order to evolve.

I was happy to discover today that I have misunderstood both the Law of Attraction and the Buddhist teaching on acceptance. It is okay to accept what is and it is okay to want more. I just have to find a happy medium...a "middle way" between them both maybe. ( but I really don't know lol...just have to reflect and meditate on this a bit more.)

All is well!

Tara Brach ( )Healing Addiction: Deconditioning the Hungry Ghosts.

Eckhart Tolle ( ) Confidence and the Source of True Satisfaction

I can't get into global right now to finish the citation.