Writing

 The role of the writer is not to say what we can all say, but to say what we are unable to say.

Anais Nin

Chest pain persists, not working outside, back to doing yoga classes but not much else in terms of physicality. It is like Life is telling me I am meant to be writing. I am left with the ability, the  opportunity to spend my time here and it is exactly where I want to be. 

I have been writing and submitting...which is productive enough to sssh the Martha in me, isn't it? I have to ask myself this question when it comes to writing: Is being read by many all that important to me? When I submit, I submit not so much with that goal in mind but to simply complete the writing circle I created for myself.  That circle involves being inspired by some great 'healing' idea ( most of my writing centers around this concept of 'healing'), coming here...allowing whatever it is that wants to come out to come out, taking bits of citation from all the research notes I collected over the years and adding them if and where they fit, using the intellectual mind to rearrange the thoughts and concepts in a relatable way, and then I create a draft, then another and another...I do all this before I am ready to submit, even a proposal. I then do my market research...I choose about 8 publishers at a time, readjust the query or proposal to those requested submission guide lines each publisher wants and I submit.  Once I click "send", I am done. I have completed my circle knowing that I have sent what I have written to one reader...the acquisitions editor.  I have done what I can do.  I do not sit around wringing my hands waiting.  Most times, I completely forget that I have something 'out there'. It is out of my hands.  Hmm!

As far as this blog...I obviously do not care about being read by many.  I am not sure about what is going on with it...going from 100 readers to less than ten a day? The last 20 entries have not been read and what does get read, according to statistics, is stuff dragged up from years ago? Those that I know that used to read me tell me they cannot "find me" anymore?  I am not promoting or pushing...have not been since the beginning.  If I write something that gets published I will refer the reader here in my bio so they know who it was that wrote that article. I do not expect them or need them, however,  to become a "fan" of what I do here. I just need to be real and let them know who I am. For me, it is all about keeping it real...all else is out of my hands.

I do not "feel" that my job is to ensure I get read...to ensure that people are pleased with my writing. It isn't about collecting 'many' readers My job is to simply write...to allow what is inside me to come out. Whatever that is ,  is bigger than "me. " 

Sure ego wants more but but I want less ego. :) 

All is well.