Poem In Progress

The Ego's Reflection

Like Narcissus did so curiously, many centuries ago
I look about for who I am.  I simply do not know.
When I glance into the water I am surprised by what I see;
there I find a shiny reflection staring smugly back at me.

"This must be who I am," I utter as I reach in to pick "me" up
but  alas this watery  image, with my hands, I just can't seem to cup.
It slips through my fingers no matter how tightly I hold on.
It drips, slithers  and  trickles away. What am I doing wrong?

Fear then overcomes me. This precious image I do not want to  lose.
So I seek and grasp  at any  form around me that  I can somehow use
to help me retrieve my perfect self from the surface of this lake;
to gather it up  in its shiny  form within me,  to end a desperate  ache.

But no matter what I grab or try to cling to, like the water, it slips through
the space between my fingers and disappears from earthly view.
I can not understand it as my  confusion and  frustration grows
I cry out questions to the Echo, to Nemesis and to anyone that knows.

"Why is it so challenging to hold onto a dense  object made of matter?
And why does this lovely image I look upon break apart and splatter
whenever I dip my fingers beneath the surface the gawking world sees?"
Then I hear the silent  answer from within me and I fall down upon  my knees.
 
What I look upon so longingly, will never be more than a  mere  reflection
always lacking in the depth of being , in sweet stillness and divine perfection.
I am not just a shadow rippling on the surface of this pool of collected rain
I am the Seer, not the seen.  I am the  creator, not the  goddess of the vain.

White and gold petals soon surround the image  marking its glorious rebirth
and the roots of understanding ground the Self I am more deeply into earth. 
Who I am cannot be reflected back for anyone to name, or know or see
and it is with  this eternal knowing that the Observer is finally set free.
 
Dale-Lyn Feb 2020

Decided to put this poem here because  it came out here but it came out patchy.  So I put it down as a work in progress.

Day One (Sunday):

This came out rather quickly...will be back later to finish it up.  :) In a rush...teaching two yoga classes today.

Inspired by Eckhart Tolle video:

Day Two (Monday):

Struggling with this one...don't know why.  Playing with it  more than I normally would.  Still needs more revision.

Why I am showing a work in progress I don't know.  It used to be that I would seldom show anyone anything unless it was revised and edited, revised some more.  But I just felt the compulsion  to work on it in front of you so to speak.  Who knows why.  :)

Day Three (Tuesday):

Third set of tweaks. I can't tell you it is done because I don't know if it is.  A poem, for me, is only done when the internal restlessness in me subsides into nothingness. When I can look at it and feel none of that agitation it is done.  But if I feel an "ughhhhh" or a twisting in my gut  when I read it...I feel I am being pulled right back to it by a demanding bossy muse that says, "Fix that!"  Man I wish this boss would pay me. :)

All good.  Not going back to it right now...just in case this feeling, which is subsiding enough to allow me to walk away lol,, comes back when I look at it.  I will check in with it tomorrow.  All good.

Again Inspiration: Eckhart Tolle 2020 Ego My Life https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O5cdb0Hhu-s