In darkness and in safety ,
by the secret ladder, disguised,
O, happy lot!
In darkness and concealment ,
my house being now at rest
In that happy night,
In secret, seen of none,
Seeing not myself.
Without other light or guide
Save that which in my heart was burning.
Saint John of the Cross, Dark Night of the Soul. Stanza Two and Three
Just from reading these next two stanzas I am envious of the narrators relationship with the dark night. It is not addressed as something to be feared or resisted, but something to be excited about, appreciated and celebrated. Why? Because of the way it hides the speaker on their quest.
In darkness and in safety, by the secret ladder disguised . Why does he/she want to be so concealed? He/she feels safe in this concealment. So no one would recognize them and stop them from pursuing their quest? I can see that in the imagery of the lover sneaking off to meet their beloved. There is something about this obscurity that is so important to the poet. I can't help but think how these ideas of direct union would be viewed by the hierarchy- dependent church at that time...blasphemy? The poet has to be sneaky and secretive about his desire for direct union? Or is this "humility" vow of the brotherhood leading him to diminish his expression of faith...to "be pious" instead of "appearing " pious? This secret ladder? Is he speaking to this alternative route, the non ordained route, he discovered to finding God...that maybe was not aligned with church dogma at the time? ...When I think of ladder...I think of the speaker sneaking down a ladder from upstairs in order to get out. That is like descending down into the depths of our beings from our intellectual faculties ( where most of the church dogma would have been pointing to). It is about going deeper. His quest is an inner one, not a church directed one.
O happy lot! Again the speaker is expressing how fortunate he/she is at having this night ...this dark time to process through. Because it is a place to hide the mission and the quest? I had this thought: Was the poet depressed or ill and seeing this depression or illness as a means for the church to get off his back so he could pursue his inner quest? I don't know why that came to my mind. But obviously this night somehow surprises him...though we all know night comes every 12 hours? It was a fortunate thing that emerged almost unexpectedly....it seems... by the way he appears to feel so lucky he came across it.
In darkness and concealment, my house being now at rest. His/her house seems to be at rest because of the darkness and concealment? Or the house being at rest caused the darkness and concealment? In the former...we can view the house as something visibly unstable until the night came and hid it from view? The "me". the reliance on bodily senses to perceive the world, the reliance on intellectual and conceptual mind's need for knowledge etc is consumed by this period of darkness, so it is no longer agitating the soul?? In the latter possibility...I see death as being that which puts everything but the soul at rest.
In that happy night, in secret seen of none. Again there is this joy that the night was there allowing for this secret ...this obscurity...this hiding to take place. Why does it have to be a secret? Why does this quest have to be hidden from the view of others? Just like the lover sneaking off knows they are breaking social and moral contracts...does the poet feel he is breaking his religious contract? There does not seem to be any shame though for doing so...just joy and excitement? Still ...there is that need to keep it all a secret. Or is the secretive, concealed, hidden nature of this simply referring to the fact that it is internal not external quest, therefore cannot be seen by others. The poet may be speaking to the "mystery" of awakening.
Seeing not myself. Now this is a big one. We see a dissolution of ego maybe. In the first stanza ego was still hanging around but we see as the speaker gets further into the dark night...he/she can no longer see the little self. Of course, that is what the dark night on this awakening quest is all about, isn't it? A dissolution of me. We stop seeing who we thought we were. At this point the speaker does not yet see what is ahead either.
Without other light or guide Save what my heart was burning. So this line marks the confusion part of the dark night...this being unable to see where we were or where we are going. There is no light...there is noone out there guiding us. It is such a personal and blind journey. So what keeps the speaker going forward? His/her burning heart...this light in the heart that is telling them to keep going. It is that desire for God that is leading the speaker forward. Blind faith leads the speaker on.
Well that is the way I see it. Yet to read Saint John's explanation. All good!
Saint John of the Cross/ translated by David Lewis ( 1908) Dark Night of the Soul .Poetry Foundation. https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poems/157984/the-dark-night-of-the-soul
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