Virya and the Five Hindrances

 Don't Watch the Clock; Do What it Does. Keep Going!

Sam Levenson https://www.brainyquote.com/topics/keep-going-quotes

Hmm!  Right now it is almost one in the afternoon and I am just coming here.    I allot the first three- four waking hours of my Life as a retired human being to my spiritual development.  

My  Morning Practice 

Now, I realize the word "spiritual" here will trip people up.  What I mean is I allow time each day for calming, healing and opening my mind and heart, which technically is  what is offered in most spiritual processes. Maybe my motivations have changed somewhat in that  I am no longer putting all my focus on  getting to heaven when I die...I am trying to get to peace now. I am working on my mind. So I get up, sit in quiet solitude while I drink my tea; I listen or read something inspirational related to waking up to a higher level of awareness; I do a set of sun salutations, a short walking meditation around the house, and then I sit to meditate. I fill out today's entry in my gratitude journal and write a blurp in my devotional.  After that I come here to write, learn, teach...whatever it is I am doing.  Only then do I feel equipped to go "out there".

Well, I feel a little discombobulated because my routine did not go smoothly this morning. I did not embrace solitude like I expect to do each morning.  D. was home. I found myself slipping in my committment to be device-less and disconnected from social media for the first three hours and began answering texts and emails. I tried multitasking two very important spiritual tasks I do every morning...meditating while I listened to some profound teacher.  (Not wise). When it came time to come here and write for learning and teaching purposes...I couldn't get into my computer right away ( the poor old thing is dying- overloaded, and overworked. ).  It took me an hour and a half just to get to the point I could type here. So my three hour spiritual practice is going to be a lot longer. Sigh! I am feeling a little more than frustrated

First of all, I realize through this reaction I am having that though committment and routine is important in any practice we should not be too attached to  any of it! I can look at this also and use it as another example in my real life experience with the five hindrances. 

The Five Hindrances

According to Buddhist psychology there are five things that get in the way of us getting to that calm, clear, non reactive  mind that we may be practicing yoga, meditation, religion or whatever in order to attain. These five hindrances are: desire, aversion(ill will), sloth and torpor, worry and restlessness and finally skeptical doubt. 

Desire: Desire gets in the way because it leads to craving and a seeking of something "out there" to make us feel better "in here"  or fill in some hole we assume we have within.  If I am "wanting" from a place of ego...well that wanting is going to get in the way of attaining that which is truly beneficial to me and others...my peace of mind. Peace is already in me... I won't find it anywhere out there ...Yet there I was this morning  desiring everything in my world to accomodate my routine and quite upset that it wasn't. 

Aversion: Anger, resentment, frustration, blame, judgement , hatred etc are all feelings that push the moment away. As long as I am pushing the moment and whatever it offers away because it does not meet some idea I have of how it should be ...I am closing my heart.  A closed heart is a numb, unloving  heart and a numb, unloving heart cannot experience peace. Peace comes from a heart that allows everything in. Well...this morning I found myself closing...I was closing to D.'s presence a bit.  I was closing to the fact that my morning was not going the way I wanted and expected it to; and I was closing to this computer in a less than calm and centered  way.

Sloth and Torpor: we talked about this a day ago.  This low energy state that pulls us away from the action necessary in this process of waking up and leads us to check out in a myriad of ways...is I beleive...the epidemic of our culture. 

Worry and restlessness: A monkey mind that jumps about and pulls us in one direction and then another can be very distarcting .  We will be so busy watching the activity and antics  of the restless mind, we won't be able to see the clear and peaceful mind behind the performance.  We really need to sooth this mind.  And worry...well the greek translation for the root of the word means to strangle and that is what worry does ...it strangles our awareness  of the peace within with all the"what if's" and "Oh nos!" it distracts us with. I allowed both worry and restlessness into my morning.

Skeptical Doubt:  All it takes is a bit of "I am not sure if this going to work" or "I don't think I am meant to have peace" for our faith in the process to crumble. I found myself sayng to  D. today, after letting out a few less than peaceful words to the computer, "I don't think I am supposed to be writing here, maybe. Maybe taht is what the Universe is telling me."  

Virya

Hmm! I was going to quit but a little voice in me beneath the desire, aversion, sloth and torpor, restlessness and worry and the doubt...said: 

 "No! You are going to finish your practice. Yes...recognize how these hindrances are a part of your mental state right now and do not beat yourself up for the fact that they are there...but at the same time don't listen to their arguments. Complete your practice...even if it is a bit longer than normal, a bit more  jumbled and chaotic this morning.  Let go of the need to have it go smoothly and perfectly...it does not have to be perfect, it just has  to be. Note the frustration and anger but Don't close that heart! Put a little energy and effort into getting into your computer (balance that sloth and torpor with its counterparts) . Note the worry and restlessness but  remember...it is just a show in the forefront...it will pass and you will see the peace that is the background waiting. Replace that smidgeon of doubt with a mustard seed of faith...that is all it will take. You got this! Persevere!" 

Keep Going!

Viriya...which is our willingness to keep going, to exert efort and energy...will get us past the five hindrances. It helped me this morning...or otherwise I wouldn't be about to write:

All is well in my world!