Catch Yourself Complaining

See if you can catch yourself complaining in either speech or thought, about a situation you find yourself in, what other people do or say, your surroundings, even the weather.  To complain is always non acceptance of what is. It invariably carries an unconscious negative charge. When you complain, you make yourself into a victim. When you speak out you are in your power.  So change the situation by taking action or speaking out if necessary or possible; leave the situation or accept it.  All else is madness. -Eckhart Tolle (https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/969469-see-if-you-can-catch-yourself-complaining-in-either-speech)

All Else is Madness!

Finally...my daughter 'gets it!' She finally sees that focusing on all the negatives of her situation, complaining about it to herself and others...listening to ego tell her she is trapped in it...is simply madness.  It only makes her feel worse. 

After what she called a "horrible week" she finally accepts the fact that if she wants to feel better she has to think better and speak better about her situation. She sees that though things are not the way she would like them to be, they are what they are.  Complaining about them does more harm than good. Accepting them and trying to make the best of it is her next goal.

Wow! What a wonderful realization for an 18 year old to make. What a game changer!

The Madness of Complaining

When we find ourselves in unfavorable life situations we need to realize that the life situation only causes a bit of the discomfort we are experiencing,  if any.  Our reaction to it is responsible for most of our suffering. 

It is in our heads that we suffer.  We focus and think about all the negative things we got going on around us and we create this 'unconscious negative charge' that harms us much more than the situation could.  We voice it out loud...not to make change (that's different...that's proactive) ...but to complain and we sink down into the muck of our perception.

So what do we do?

• Catch yourself complaining. Listen to yourself explain the situation to someone else or catch the thoughts you are allowing to fester in your own mind. 
• Know the difference between complaining and trying to speak out and express in order to make change.  When it is a complaint...you will hear yourself listing a thousand reasons why you are stuck in the situation you are in and why any of the offered or self thought resolutions to your situation won't work.  When in a complaining frenzy, we actually resist help or any other suggestion to think differently.  When we express and speak out to make change, however...we are open to resolution and a different way of looking at the situation.
• Know that the complaint is a resistance to what is...The complaining provides a struggle that requires a lot of effort and energy and takes you absolutely no where but down!
• Accept the situation for what is...doesn't mean you have to like it; doesn't mean you have to stay in it.  Just accept it.
• Listen to your heart and the wisdom it provides
• Now make your choice: You have three choices...you can walk away from the situation; you can speak up against it or actively change it or you can just accept it for what it is and make the best of it.  The thing is you have the power to choose what you want to do!

All else is madness!

Oh another little trick you can try.  Try smiling a big goofy smile as you complain to yourself or other people.  You will see that it is almost next to impossible to do so without feeling a little less like complaining.  :)

All is well in my world.