Here struggle can become useful feedback. It is telling us that something is arising in our experience that we are not accepting. If we were accepting it, we wouldn't be struggling. "Nonacceptance" is just another word for "wanting"-wanting something other than what is happening. And wanting, craving, is the cause of dukkha.
Joseph Goldstein, page 305
Hmmm! We all experience unwanted, uncomfortable, unpleasant, unsatisfactory moments, don't we? And what we usually do when we experience those moments is struggle against them, do we not?
Struggling? Suffering?
You may be sitting on the couch and feeling "bored", which in today's society is often considered an unwanted, unpleasant and unsatisfactory experience. So you begin to struggle a bit mentally with the boredom...thoughts come in to the mind...you may begin to think of all the things you should be doing and begin to feel overwhelmed. You do not know where to start or how to start so you do nothing. The boredom increases but it also turns toward restlessness and worry. You might experience an unpleasnat feeling in your gut or in your muscles. You struggle against that "unpleasantness". You feel your body reacting...the foot starts to tap , you squirm around in your chair, you flick on the TV or play with your phone in a conditioned and subconscious attempt to distract. Or maybe you have the capacity to take your mind in another direction and you begin to fantasize about the future when things would be more pleasant and you would be different than what you are at that moment.
This all happens so automatically you may not even realize what you are doing and what you are feeling....but you are struggling. Most of us would not call this type of experience "suffering" but if we look closely at these reactions we would see that it is basically the same thing we experience and "do" when we are facing all forms of "unpleasantness". You are struggling here because you are not accepting this moment for what it is...not accepting the boredom. And when you are not accepting...you are wanting something other than what is happening. This wanting , this craving for something other than what is right here, right now, the "boredom" in your moment, is what is causing you your suffering, as mild and as easy to pass off as it maybe.
Craving: The Cause of All Suffering
Craving, wanting something other than what is.... is, according to the Buddha's second noble truth, the cause of all our suffering. The Pali word for craving, "Tanha", can be translated to mean, "thirst" or "fever of unsatisfied longing."(Isn't that cool?)
What we all want, whether we know it or not, is peace right? Buddhist teachings tell us that we will never quench this thirst for peace by grasping and clinging to this world of form...because we can never attain perfect satisfaction all the time in this way. I love the analogy of trying to quench a fevered thirst with salt water. When we crave, and want something "out there that we judge as pleasant"(salt water) to fulfill us and make us peaceful and happy (quench our thirst) ...the thirst doesn't go away no matter how much we drink and the process could in a sense dehydrate us even more, making us sick.
The fever of unsatisfied longing is just the opposite of peace. page 299
Unsatisfied Longings
We are conditioned to want what is pleasant, aren't we? We want what feels good to the body and mind, that which we judge as "good, right, should be" and we want to stay clear of that which is unpleasant to the body and mind, that which we judge as "bad, wrong, shouldn't be". In the above example, "boredom" was unpleasant and something we determined, very quickly and unconsciously, as unwanted. We felt our body and mind reacting to this "unwanted" feeling arising in our moment. We could not sit with it. We could not accept it. So, without being fully aware, we began to struggle against it.
Our sense of struggle was due to our "nonacceptance" or aversion...our resistance of the "unpleasant" feeling of boredom...not the boredom or the moment we were in. We automatically craved and wanted something "other than this" thus the distracting behaviour and the fantasy that took us mentally out of our moment. Reaching out of our present moments with physical or mental activity( future and past focus) does not bring that which we are really thirsty for. It does not bring peace. Craving does not bring us peace because anything we grasp and cling to in this way cannot sustain us. It is like trying to grasp a handful of smoke. If you are able to grasp it, it will pass through your grip just as quickly as it came. Our longings will always be unsatisfied. Our fevered thirst will never be quenched by drinking the salt water this world provides.
Ending Suffering/Quenching Thirst/Living Peacefully
If we truly want to end suffering, quench our fevered thirst and live in peace...we need to break out of the habit of craving, grasping, and clinging and learn to accept what is. Awakening is simply becoming aware of how we have been living, acting, thinking and then learning to approach Life in a way that brings peace rather than suffering to our experience, and the experience of all beings. We become aware. We become aware of habit mind and our sense of struggle against what is. We recognize the nonacceptance we are experiencing and we see it as a wanting something different than what is...then we see this craving behaviour as a fevered thirst of unsatisfied longing.
Pay Attention to Your Struggles
If craving is the cause of all suffering, what then is the cure? Awareness and acceptance of what is. That begins when we are paying attention to our "struggling". Our awakening is the cure that will end all suffering.
Hmmm! Something to think about, don't you think?
All is well!
Joseph Goldstein ( 2016) Mindfulness: A Practical Guide to Awakening. Boulder: Sounds True
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