Right Speech

 ...possessing five factors, speech is well spoken, not badly spoken; it is blameless and beyond reproach by the wise. What five? It is spoken at the proper time; what is said is true; it is spoken gently; what is said is beneficial; it is spoken with a mind of loving kindness. 

The Buddha from Mindfulness: A Practical Guide to Awakening. page 378

How is your speech these days?  Do you even know?

I had to stop and think upon reading this chapter on Right Speech.  Am I speaking well? Am I blameless in what I say  and how I speak? Or would others be offended or find fault in my speech?  Am I adhering to the five factors of right speech? 

Right Time

Am I speaking at the right time...the time others need to and are ready to hear what I have to say? Or am I speaking at times determined by a selfish ego? Am I interupting?  Maybe I am holding back from speaking up when someone really needs to hear what I have to say?   

Right Context: Truth

Am I speaking honestly?  Am I speaking only truth and refraining from uttering what is untrue even if it is only what seems to be a little white lie? Am I holding back on speaking the tuth because I am afraid to? 

Right Tone

What tone am I using when I speak? Is it gentle and soft?  Is there anger, frustration  or impatience in my voice? Am I ridiculing and being sarcastic? Am I careful to be gentle and friendly as I speak?

Right Benefit

Is what I say beneficial to others? Is it useful information I am sharing? Or am I just speaking to hear myself talk? Am I gossiping and making idle chitchat?  Am I sharing what is truly important to me and possibly to others? Even if it is truth I speak, will it benefit or hurt others? Am I slandering and doing harm to those not there when I speak? 

Right Thought

What are the thoughts behind my desire to speak?  Is it lovingkindness? Am I trying to hurt or make guilty? Am I seeking a form of venegance?  Am I trying to gratify the "little me"? Even if it is the truth I speak, is my motivation , in any way, to hurt that person I am sharing the truth with? 

Hmmm!  I really need to continue to observe and improve upin my spech.  What about you?

An Experiment

I love this personal experiment that Goldstein  tried while working in the peacecorps (page 375). For months, he did his best not to speak about anyone else to anyone else.  I am assuming that meant he spoke neither good or bad about anyone. What he found was that when he stuck to this intention, he spoke a lot less ( so much of our speaking is about other people) and he became less judgemental about others and himself.  

I want to try  this experiment because I have developed a habit of countering the  bad things I want to say about others to others. As soon as I realize I am about to say something negative, I say something positive or very neutral about that person.  That may seem like I am practicing "right speech" but I am not. The thought behind what I say is still negative and harmful and it may even be reflected in my tone.It is also somehwat dishonest because what I say does not reflect what I am feeling at the momnent.  If I were, instead, to say nothing at all when I felt a certain aversion and desire to talk about it...eventually thoughts like that would go away and I would not not be taking part in "wrong speech".

I will start that experiment soon and will let you know when I do. It may mean a lot less writing here lol It may also require another elastic wrist band.  Sorry wrists lol

Hmm!  Something to think about.

All is well.

Joseph Goldstein (2016) Mindfulness: A Practical Guide To Awakening. Boulder: Sounds True