Complete Confidence

I have complete confidence in the wisdom and the power of the Universal Subconscious Mind. I do not predict the manner in which each of my thoughts will manifest; I have complete faith that God moves in the most perfect manner.
Andersen, Uell S

Did I Complain?

Two full days in without complaint  and that may be debatable.  Last evening, I had to question if I had complained or not.  I had an unexpected visitor who wanted to discuss some issues regarding our children.  It was a heavy conversation because the topic matter was heavy but I think I remained honest, to the point, pragmatic and open during the conversation.  I felt genuine compassion and loving kindness toward her and her view point. I also felt compassion for myself and the two individuals involved. Though there was a lot of "concern" on my part, there was also a direct intention to stay positive especially with what I said.

I did stress that the system, as it presently is, is deficient in its ability to provide much needed resources but that honestly did not "feel" like a complaint.  I was  stating a fact with the hope of finding a way around the deficit.

I am not saying this conversation did not bring me down or lead to a certain amount of stress.  It did.  I felt the familiar heaviness of worry and negativity come over me...but...I did not vocalize it ( as far as I can remember)  and that is the measurable criteria for switching wrists. 

Getting Beyond Triggers?

Also during this conversation, another issue was inadvertently brought up regarding the individual whom I felt was getting in the way of me getting a proper diagnosis for this mass I had discovered in November.  (I have written about it extensively in December, January and February)  I was reminded by this individual  of what I suspected then....that I could not have been the only person his seemingly  ego-based judgments were impacting. Others were being hurt by these judgments.  I did not complain outwardly about this person.  I did not relay my story.  I just mentioned that I knew that his judgments have  negatively impacted others and stated that eventually his behaviours  will all come to public light and these situations will be dealt with and  prevented from happening in the future....without our need to make official complaints. I did not see that as a complaint. Still not sure though if I alluded to more with nuances or judgement.  I am giving myself the benefit of the doubt on this one and keeping the elastic where it is.

This conversation  did trigger in me some old fear and anger related to the  situation and I began to wonder again if his lack of a proper diagnosis was allowing something in me  to go untreated for too long.  I did not speak outwardly of this but brought myself back to breath and being.  I reminded myself:  I do not have to put any energy into trusting  his judgment or doubting it.  He , after all, has so little power over my wellness.  I just have to put this in the hands of God and trust that it is all being taken care of. I Let go and Let God!

So I am going to say, I have two full days in.

How cool is that?   

Andersen, Uell S.. Three Magic Words . BN Publishing. Kindle Edition.

Don't Resist; Just Refocus

Across my consciousness comes a constant procession of thoughts and I observe them. I do not make up these thoughts - I know they come from the Universal Subconscious Mind, and I watch as they are presented to me. I slow the train of thoughts. I examine each of them, then let go, neither accepting nor rejecting.
Andersen, Uell S.. Three Magic Words ....Sixth Meditation

What we resist persists

The more we fight the mind and resist the thoughts that show up on it...the more the mind fights back.  Did you ever notice that?

If I told you right now not "to think of ice-cream...to close your eyes and think whatever comes up but not about ice cream. Okay...now when you open your eyes, for one full hour,  you can think of whatever you want but not ice cream!

How did you make out? My guess is the first thing you thought of was probably ice-cream and that thought kept popping up for that hour.  Why?  Because what we resist persists.

We Are Not Putting the Thoughts in Our Minds

We also have to remember that we, as separate little selves, are not creating our  own individual thoughts.  We are just tapping into a storehouse of thoughts, feelings and experiences already established in the universal sub-conscious mind we all share. The thoughts of ice-cream  are already there.  We just water them and allow them to grow with our focus and attention.

Resistance Makes Our Thoughts Grow Stronger

When I told you "not" to think of ice-cream " ... you ended up watering ice-cream because you were focusing on "not"  watering it. Ice-cream kept getting watered the more you resisted thinking about it until it grew into and it became something your conscious mind created.  Resistance was the "vita-grow" enriched water you poured over the seed of this thought. It grew into your conscious mind.

 And what you may have noticed, as well, the more you resisted thinking about ice-cream, the more the thought grew in the conscious mind...and...the more evidence of ice-cream you may notice in the external environment.  In that one hour, you may have run into ads or commercials about ice-cream, the ice cream truck will come by, the store will announce a 2 for 1 sale on their tubs of ice-cream.  People everywhere will be eating ice cream.

Resistance is often more powerful than intention.  It is important to know that when you avoid  looking at your bills; stuffing pain away so you or others can't see it or struggle against the way something currently is.

The object is not to resist that which you do not want in your mind and therefore in your life,  but to realize it has nothing to do with you.  That thought of ice-cream or money is in the collective universal subconscious. You didn't put it there and you are not responsible for getting it out of there.  All you have to do is decide if it is something you want to water and see growing or something you want to let go of, so you can focus that powerful attention on something you want in your life.

Allow All Thoughts to Pass By

So allow all your thoughts to just pass by as you observe them without judgment.  Recognize them, don't deny them or push them away. Just allow them to be. If they are sticky and tenacious pick them up and hold them close for second before sending them back on their way. Do not accept or reject any of them as more of a passing thought. 

When you see "ice-cream" or whatever thought, feeling or "problematic" experience you have been trying to avoid...recognize it, allow it, and embrace it.  You can when you are ready look deeply into the causes of it...but only when you mastered the letting go part. Let it go...just let it go with a "this does not serve me now and it will not serve me or others in the future".  Allow it to pass by.

Refocus your Attention

Now place your attention on what you do want. A loving thought, a giving thought, a healthy thought, feeling or experience passes by...recognize that  (How?  It makes you feel good!) , allow that, and refocus your attention on it...hold it  to your chest without clinging or grasping and then let it go with the affirmation, and the faith and the trust that you will see more of this thought and feeling thing in your mind and in your life.

Hmmm!  This is what healing the mind/healing our lives is all about, according to Uell S. Andersen.  Kind of makes sense , doesn't it?

All is well.

Andersen, Uell S.. Three Magic Words . BN Publishing. Kindle Edition

Grasping or Guided

Each day is another step on my journey to a oneness with God. I do not seek; I know. I do not strive; I am guided.
Andersen, Uell S...Fifth Meditation

So Much Learning

So much learning I am absorbing and I just cannot seem to get enough. I find myself reaching out( now that isn't good is it, lol?) for all the teachings that are showing up around me, so many different perspectives, so many different approaches yet with One Truth connecting them all.

Thirsty

I am thirsty for that Truth and no matter how much I seem to drink, the thirst doesn't go away.  It is a thirst that I am loving the process of quenching! I want more...I read more...I listen to more...I go inward more...I am so very thirsty for it all. 

Yet, there are times I have to ask if I am absorbing any of it or if I am like some strainer riddled with holes and all this precious knowledge  slips right out the moment it comes in. There is just so much that I am taking in so quickly, you know?  How can anyone absorb that much? Like I read four such books in  a little over a week and I have more on my desk and in the Kindle waiting to be read.

Is this "grasping"? 


I have to ask this...honestly.  Is it?

Inward Searching

The  difference here compared to the grasping I have done in the past, is this  is an inward searching...sure I am looking for pointers "out there" but I know where these things point to.  These pointers won't delude me by telling me I need to make a life for myself "out there".  The pointers  take me to where I want to be.  I want to make a Life for myself in here.

Loving The Process

And it isn't a desperate grasping...where I am looking for something to fix me ...fill in my incompleteness right away...where the  thing I seek is simply a means to an end and where I am fixed only on the outcome.  I am enjoying being in each of these precious moments of learning ...I am loving the process. I am loving the learning.

Universal Support

With this thing that some may define as grasping...I seem to have the Universe on my side.  It is like all of Life circumstance's have molded  an educational  path for me to walk on. The slowing down because of a perceived health issue, the loss of my job and a social level of productivity, my more or less being spat out of the rat race with a lot of real life issues to process through...has led me here to this desire to transform suffering.  It is like all these learning tools just showed up at the exact time I needed them....one lead to another, and another, and another.  

Am I learning?

For me teaching and writing is how I learn.  It is like the writing suddenly came easy, especially around this subject.  Man...the poetry just slips out as evidence that I am absorbing something, somehow. ( Whether anyone sees it as good or bad...is irrelevant ...it is a measure of my learning.)

I realize that I am not grasping in an unhealthy way...I am not seeking; I am realizing that I know more than I thought I did.  I am realizing and remembering. And   I am not striving to get to that place of unruffled and placid waters, I am simply being guided there.

How cool is that?

All is well in my world!


Andersen, Uell S.. Three Magic Words . BN Publishing. Kindle Edition.

Unruffled and Placid Waters

If your mind is beautiful, then all of Life is beautiful.
Michael Singer

...in the recesses of my being, there is utter calm, a place of unruffled and placid waters, where the truth is apparent and the clamor of the world does not exist.
-Fourth Meditation; Three Magic Words

 

How beautiful is that?  Is your mind beautiful?

The Space Within

Within everyone of us is that space; that serene place of "unruffled and placid waters" and this place is our reality, not the world we look out upon with these very limited organs of vision on our heads. When will we get that?

Listening to  both Michael Singer and Eckhart Tolle  today in a couple of videos ( see links below) I was reminded of how this beautiful place is within us all...and it is the only place where true lasting joy exists. 

How The Mind Hides This Place

We too often  feel that this mind-space within us is anything but unruffled.  In fact, we often perceive it to be  raging like a tsunami.  We also have it in our heads that  we need to manipulate, fix, control, take from or distract with  the world outside of us in order to make this internal chaos calm down when that is not the case at all.

The conceptual and egoic parts of our mind will make us uneasy , will lead us 'out there' for answers and solutions to the chaos it, itself, creates and it will also place a veil of 'conceptual knowing'  over the  forever  unchanging " unruffled and placid waters " of our inner being. It will make our minds anything but beautiful if we give it the reins.

There is a place of calm, however, that exists beneath the conceptual mind, beneath the ego, beneath all our mixed up thinking, outward seeking and complaining.  We do not need to go 'out there' to end suffering...we just need to sink deeper into what is and always has been within us...our very being in this very moment. We do that by removing the veil from that which is.  We cut through the negative thinking, the complaining, the struggling and resisting the  habitual mind is programmed to do...so we can float in those unruffled placid waters.

The Process of Discovering

It is a process and as we give up say, for example, our habit of complaining, as I am attempting to do...we will see that it is challenging  to break through such conditioned habits of perceiving and behaving. It is a process.  I had to switch wrists four times in 24 hours lol. 

It is also very important to be self compassionate as we progress to a heightened state of positivity and openness. We do not beat ourselves up for our slip ups which are bound to come...we do not punish ourselves for it...we learn from each complaint and love ourselves into those placid waters.  Self compassion is called for.

I started my daughter on this challenge today and she assumed as I was placing the elastic ceremoniously and humorously on her wrist, that she was suppose to snap the elastic against herself every time she complained.  she thought each complaint deserves a punishment. I told her that each complaint deserve a big "thank you."

Proceed with Self Compassion

This is what the mind conditions us to do...to punish ourselves for our errors in judgement, for our lack of perfection etc.  It expects and demands a struggle to succeed, a fight against something which is often others or ourselves.  This challenge  is not a battle ...it is a letting go and an opening to a better way of living. It took time to build up this mental behavioural habits and it will take time to dismantle them so we can see and experience, once and for all,  what lay beneath them.

Keep your eyes on the prize, I tell myself and her as we switch from wrist to wrist.  The prize is peace, joy, happiness and real Love.  It is also connection to something much grander than "little me" could ever offer us.  The prize is  a connection to our Source, a connection to all we are. Hmmm!

You are a Ripple

I read another line from Bowen's book as I was coming to the end of it that reminded me , as the expression of the Poem "Just a Little Ripple?" did as it came through me... You are a ripple in the great ocean of humanity that resounds around the world. You are a blessing.

All is well.

Andersen, Uell S.. Three Magic Words . BN Publishing. Kindle Edition.
Andersen,

Bowen, Will. A Complaint Free World: How to Stop Complaining and Start Enjoying the Life You Always Wanted (p. 272). Potter/TenSpeed/Harmony. Kindle Edition.

Michael Singer ( May 2020) Why We suffer-Mindfulness Training with Michael A. Singer. SoundsTrue https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qtr21LqHKcs

Eckhart Tolle (October, 2019) The Power of Inner Stillness. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xoW_cPx_638

Early Morning Stillness

It is in the quiet stillness
of early morning
that I find
what I am looking for.
A feeling of completeness
uncurls in my being,
pushing past the years
of fear and guilt
that have been imprinted
as "Necessary"
on my weary mind.
In the timeless space between
the thinking and the doing,
I find more precious emptiness,
a nothingness so perfect
in its fullness,
that I hold my breath
and wait for it to consume me.
It fills me with a wisdom
that cannot be spoken,
only known.

© Dale-Lyn 2010

 

This came to me, years ago, when things in my life were really starting to shift and I felt so unsettled. I seemed to be losing control of my health, my children, my ego and my family...My sister was also  diagnosed with cancer at that time.  This little poem, I think, marked the beginning of my awakening...or at least a big step toward deeper awakening.  

I put it  in a little book of poems I did up for my sister.   It was half a symbolic gift of hope for her and a silly vanity project ( which I am very embarrassed about lol) to help restore  my ego as it seemed to be, to my horror at the time, slowly dying.

Ego,  is still here,   clinging to a few dying breaths.  And my beautiful sister,  is alive and well ten years later. I am much more awake now. I can actually understand what this poem means now which I couldn't do then.  Go figure.

Anyway, I literally just came across this ten minutes ago and had the urge to put it here.  It is all good!

The Non-Error of Complaint

I deny error; it is simply progress toward truth.  I know that it is impossible to fail when faith is present.
Uell S. Andersen, Third Meditation in Three Magic Words

  Not as easy as it looks to get two days, let alone 21 days, of complaint free living in. I did get 24 hours in though...yeah!! I then had to switch my bracelet twice.

Please know that what comes from my mouth is only like  10 % of what I got going on in my mind.  I am far from evolved away from any negative thinking.  I have just learned to control, to some extent, what I allow to come "out" of me. The outspoken complaint, which is so much easier to monitor than all those negative thoughts, allows me to see what I got swirling around in my head.

Bowen describes that which distinguishes a  complaint  from a non complaining statement  in  A Complaint Free world, as the meaning and the energy behind them.It isn't  that the things I say are all that "complainy" in the context of what most of us would call a complaint but the energy behind what I say outwardly is quite negative.  Once the words are spoken out loud to myself or others...I can retrace them back to the negativity that begot them. That is what is so cool about this experiment. 

For example today, when I was attempting to tie the dogs outside, I could not find the tie-outs and heard myself saying to a person who wasn't even there, "You better not have taken them to tie up things on your truck!" This may seem like no more than a simple wish.   The energy behind it, however,  was one of resentment and resistance indeed making it a complaint. 


Resentment

Instantly the little circumstance led me to recall all the "other" times this individual , in a state of unawareness or what some might call "thoughtlessness or unconsciousness"  did not take into consideration the value  "things" may have for other people. These past behaviours were totally non malicious in anyway but leading to a certain amount of unintended suffering ( however minor) for someone else. Having the tie outs means that I can not tie up the dogs outside all day which proves to be inconvenient for me and the dogs.

Now I am not even sure he has them.  I am creating my little complaint/reaction on an assumption based on  memory of past behaviours.  The big learning here gained from examining this complaint  is  that I am still clinging to past resentments in my resentment bank, of what my ego likes to label as "inconsiderate and disrespectful" behaviours of others. So as soon as I see a situation that differs from what I thought I wanted, this resentment is triggered. The complaint has moved that resentment from the thought realm to the realm of external awareness.

Resistance to What Is

Another thing that differentiates complaint from a statement of fact is a certain energy of resistance to what is.  "He better not"...is equivalent to an "Oh No!" , a "This shouldn't be", or a "This is not fair or right!". 

When we complain we are resisting what the moment has for us.  When we resist what the moment has for us , we resist the moment.  And when we resist the moment, guess what?  We resist Life. This complaint showed me that I was resisting Life! I don't want to do that even for a second.

So this small little wish definitely deserved a wrist switching.  And what a wonderful opportunity to present to me my own resentment and resistance.  Once I am aware of it I can work on letting go of it. Right?

The non-complaint and drama free statement I could have responded with, one that  Life, the almighty teacher,  would give me a gold star for, could have been: "Hmmm!  I don't know where the tie outs are.  Maybe D. has them because he has taken similar things before without thinking but maybe he doesn't.  The fact remains that I have no tie outs.  There is no "better not" or "shouldn't be" about this.  It just is."

Hmmm!

So I am switching wrists and beginning all over again, and again and again. What seems like error on our  part when we have to switch wrists is actually just progress toward truth! How cool is that?

All is well in my world!


Bowen, Will. A Complaint Free World: How to Stop Complaining and Start Enjoying the Life You Always Wanted . Potter/TenSpeed/Harmony. Kindle Edition.

Learning from Complaining

There are only two things you can do for yourself. One is conception, and the other is conviction. All the work of creation rests with another than you. For no man is responsible for anything in this life except his thought and his belief.
Andersen, Uell S..

The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines “complain” as “to express grief, pain, or discontent.”...By its very definition, a complaint is spoken.
Bowen, Will.

Switching Wrists

Well I am now wearing the elastic I had placed on my left wrist yesterday, on my right.  :) All good.  I love this exercise because it gets me examining my internal and external behaviours. I was actually quite surprised to discover that I do pretty good in the "outward complaining" department.  I caught myself three times and though  others said "no" when I sought to validate my complaining by asking "Was that  a complaint?"; and though they may not obviously express grief, pain or discontent ...I recorded these three things as complaints because of the negativity factor.  Three complaints in 24 hours is pretty good, don't you think? And yes I am recording my complaints so I can better understand them and restructure those mental formations in my mind that are less than positive.

First Two Complaints Based On Assumption and Bias

The first two came during a certain intense frustration last evening looking for an individual who was scheduled to go into rehab today after a year long wait to get in.  He went on  a seven day pre-rehab binge and we couldn't find him anywhere. This individual will literally die if he does not recover.  And though that sounds like a negative statement and a complaint in itself, I can assure you it is a simple fact.

So while we were looking all over the area for him, I could feel familiar frustration, fear and worry...anger and resentment brewing to the surface but I was very "cool" about the whole thing.  That is until my suspicious, past conditioned  and assuming mind stepped up to question the behaviour of one of his friends who went out of his way to help us find him.  I questioned out loud , "I wonder what his real motivation for helping us was? Was there something in that apartment he didn't want us to see?"  I "assumed" he too was an addict, and as an "addict" he would want all addicts to stay addicts and his motive for getting into the car with us had to be for some other reason then helping us get his friend into recovery. The words that came out of my mouth, helped me to see what kinds of seeds were growing from my store consciousness.

Shortly after that, as we were reviewing the days events to determine the possible where abouts of this individual we were looking for, D. mentioned a few things this individual had said to him.  I found myself calmly shaking my head saying, "You know we cannot believe a word he says when he is using like this."

Man...how negative is that...to dismiss the core goodness of  human beings to their exterior conditions? To stigmatize and stereotype a group of individuals, who are inflicted in this way, as selfish and uncaring and always lying. Yes desperation for a certain survival leads some  individuals who are severely addicted to do some dishonest and less than ethical things....but to "absolute" everything is unfair.  

Recognizing that I did that ( whether there was an ulterior motive for helping or not; whether he lied or not) really knocked some sense into me about a conditioned belief/ seed/ prompter within my mind. I do not want to water that seed any more.  I am not going to beat myself up for it, either.  I am just going to observe it, and learn from it.  Hopefully, I will be more compassionate and grateful as I look at individuals who suffer from such life threatening and desperation inducing conditions with less prejudice and assumption in the future.

The third complaint came this morning when I, because of a hot humid environment, and extra hot flashes as well as post crisis anxiety...slept less than well, (what I just wrote was a complaint, wasn't it?) received a call at 7a m ( after I just fell asleep again) from my daughter who was looking for money for gas.  Now there is a lot of extras around this request that I will not get into but I will just say...that in my blurry eyed and grumpy state I was not nice.  I said nothing except, "Ohhhh A." followed by a big pathetic sigh.  And I believe I hung up without saying  the usual "goodbye and, love you".

Needless to say my elastic has a new home and I begin again lol.

It is all good.  It may take me a while to get my 21 days of complaint free living in, to break the habit of complaining once and for all, but I am determined to.  In the process , I get to learn so much more about my mind.  How cool is that?


All is well.

Andersen, Uell S.. Three Magic Words . BN Publishing. Kindle Edition.


Bowen, Will. A Complaint Free World: How to Stop Complaining and Start Enjoying the Life You Always Wanted (p. 28). Potter/TenSpeed/Harmony. Kindle Edition.

To Live Positively: Stop Complaining

Conceptual habits of the Conscious Mind are the greatest bar to man's discovery of himself.
Andersen, Uell S..


When you stop complaining about what you perceive to be wrong and begin to speak about what you are grateful for and what you desire, you force your manufacturer brain to develop a new product line.

Bowen, Will.  (p. 29).

 

I know, like this pear tree branch, I have the capacity to reach higher. We all do!

I am going to begin my challenge. I am going to use the teachings from Andersen's book and especially the meditations to help build faith and purpose as I attempt to become more positive in my thinking. 

I am also going to use the simplified suggestions in A Complaint Free World by Will Bowen to make it a more measurable experiment. I presently have an elastic bracelet on my wrist and am going to focus on getting 21 consecutive days of outwardly spoken complaint-free habit (much easier to control and measure than thought)  into  my life.

And, of course,  I will still adhere to the teachings of my "go-to" mentors ( who do not know they are my mentors) namely, Eckhart Tolle, Thich Nhat Hanh and Michael Singer.

Hmmm!

I will keep you posted.

All is well in my world!


Andersen, Uell S.. Three Magic Words . BN Publishing. Kindle Edition.

Bowen, Will. A Complaint Free World: How to Stop Complaining and Start Enjoying the Life You Always Wanted (p. 29). Potter/TenSpeed/Harmony. Kindle Edition.

Just a Little Ripple?

Just a Little Ripple?

Just a  little ripple...
emerging
into existence
from the vastness of ocean.
Floating under a spacious sky
that is forever changing.
Seemingly vulnerable,
blown in this direction
and that,  
at the mercy
of wind and rain
and the ocean's own
fierce and unforgiving  nature.
Seemingly alone,
struggling and competing
as a separate entity,
amongst a surface of
many "other" competing ripples. 
The little ripple bobs up and down
determined to get
to some unseen shore
up ahead  in the distance.  

Struggling,
fighting,
resisting,
all that pours and blows upon it,
pushing back
all the other ripples to do so, 
the little ripple
may someday succeed.
It may become 

a spray of salty foam
upon the shore
it thought would save it,
 only to  discover
that no salvation can be found
amongst the rock and sand.

It will see, 

in its exhausted state,
that it is water 

belonging in water
and with that realization
will  gently  be  pulled back
into the  depth
that  is and always will be "home".

Once the little ripple sees itself
and all the ripples
that surround it,  
as the ocean...
all struggling will cease.
Peace will finally
be experienced by all
when the mighty,
patient ocean sees
It's perfect powerful Self
reflected beautifully
in each tiny little ripple.

© Dale-Lyn (Pen) , June 2020

 

I don't know lol!  This came out, and not all that easily or gracefully , after listening to the below video.  Hmm!  Not going to judge.  I will put it down and possibly come back to it. I don't know lol

 

All is well!
Eckhart Tolle (June, 2020) Eckhart Tolle Special Live Teaching/ Conscious Manifestation. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8G46F9ye204

Lesson 190-200

It is your thoughts alone that cause you pain. Nothing external to your mind can hurt or injure you in anyway.
ACIM-W-190: 5: 1-2

To alter your life the only single course open is to alter your thinking!
Andersen, Uell S..

Hmmm! This is what I have been contemplating as I finish reading Andersen's book.  I see how ACIM supports a lot of his teachings.  It seems fitting to write of my understanding of the next ten lessons.  (I have been neglecting to finish this mission, so wrapped up was I in other things.  My bad! :))

Lesson 190

This lesson speaks to the fact that it is thought and thought alone that causes pain...namely an incorrect perception  It  goes on to make a very strong statement that if we believe pain is a real thing...namely some random external thing that has the power to hurt us, than we cannot truly believe in God. If God is real, there is no pain. If pain is real, there is no God. (I have to think about that statement before I comment further.) The lesson goes on to say that the world seems to be causing us pain, but the world is cause less.  It is we  that create the world with our unskillful thinking, so it is  we that create pain with our thinking. Pain is illusion; joy reality. Pain is but sleep; joy is awakening. Peace is deception; joy alone is truth. (Peace is deception?  Have to think about that one too but I am assuming right off that A Course is referring to ego's "idea" of peace, not peace itself)When we realize who we truly are and from Whom we came...we will realize this and no longer suffer pain.

This coincides beautifully with what I read from Andersen today:

Once we have come far enough to realize that all pain-physical, mental, and emotional-proceeds from errors in thinking, we are well on the way to filling our lives with vigor, abundance and joy...
Chapter 11

Lesson 191

This lesson speaks to how we have denied  our identities as "the holy son of God Himself." It teaches that if we could only believe, what I am already guessing the three magic words from Andersen's book, are alluding to...We would be free from all our illusions of this world that we created with our minds.  We would be free of suffering by realizing our Oneness with everything.

Lesson 192

In this lesson we are reminded that our function, while here in physical form,  is forgiveness.  Until we completely evolve as a race...we will need forgiveness as a means of letting go of all our illusions. We are to forgive others as well as our selves for our errors in thinking and judgment which  result in our actions. Only thinking can relieve the mind of thinking that the body is its home.

Lesson 193

Lesson 193 offers us lessons God would have us learn in order to correct our erroneous perceptions. The major point behind the lessons is Forgive, and you will see this differently. When we perceive ourselves to be suffering because of circumstance or others we are in bondage.  All we need to do to free ourselves is to remember these words and learn to believe them. Forgive !  Forgive!  Forgive!

Lesson 194

Here we are asked to let the future go and place it in God's Hands.  Instead of worrying anxiously over what tomorrow may or may not bring, we are encouraged to simply Let go and Let God! The world and our brother will stop appearing, then, to be the enemy.  We will be free.

Lesson 195

In this lesson we are taught to be sincerely grateful through Love.  Knowing that our freedom from bondage will bring everyone to freedom we walk the road to god in Love.

Lesson 196

Despite the lies ego tells us, we need to know that when we hurt another, we hurt ourselves.  We do not fear others, we fear ourselves and when we realize this we can step back away from fear and into Love. Love allows us to see how w are all One.

Lesson 197

Keeping on the thought stream that we are really all One, this lesson teaches that when we are grateful it is us that earn the gratitude. When we accept the gifts we have been given gratefully they are accepted by all.

Lesson 198

Forgive, don't condemn!

When we condemn another, we end up injuring ourselves by accepting this illusionary possibility. Since there is no form of suffering that can hide an unforgiving thought; there is no form of pain that forgiveness cannot heal.  All we have to do is forgive.

Lesson 199

When we realize we are not bodies, the mind is set free.  We are not trapped within the body, we are spirit that uses mind.  Ego may tell us we are trapped in physical form to create fear but when our mind's are free to serve God and the Holy spirit, there can be no more attack thoughts or no more fear.

Love will flow in such a free mind.

Lesson 200

We will find happiness and peace nowhere but with God.  We just need to realize that this world is not where we belong and  what it offers will not bring us eternal peace.  We need to forgive ourselves for our illusions and delusions and Go home.

I think of Thich Nhat Hanh's Gatha for walking meditation as I review these lessons:

I have arrived; I am home

In the here; in  the now.

I am solid; I am free.

In the ultimate I dwell.

(peace is every breath, page 30)

 

The Review

 

In the review for the last 20 lessons, ACIM encourages us to begin our cognitive restructuring for the purposes of finding "home" and dwelling in the "Ultimate".  It asks that we use this statement when we find ourselves dwelling on thoughts that are directed by ego, dragging us back into fear, anger, despair and hopelessness.

 

This thought I do not want. I choose instead___________________

 

 

We can fill in that blank with: 

I am not a body.  I am free. For I am still as God created me.

All is well!

ACIM ( 2007)  A Course in Miracles Combined Volume.  Workbook. Foundation For Inner Peace.

Andersen, Uell S.. Three Magic Words . BN Publishing. Kindle Edition.

Thich Nhat Hanh (2011) peace is every breath. Harper One.

The Only Cure for A Different Kind of Poverty

 

The greatest disease in the west today in not TB or leprosy; it is being unwanted, unloved, and uncared for. We can cure physical diseases with medicine, but the only cure for loneliness, despair, and hopelessness is love.  There are many in the world who are dying for a piece of bread but there are many more dying for a little love.  The poverty in the West is a different type of poverty-it is not only a poverty of loneliness but also of spirituality.

-Mother Teresa

Yesterday's post wasn't just about   my daughter's friend, or about little me as the "I" though I certainly visualized him as the poem was being written and sincerely wished that I or someone could have been there . ( Notice how I say..."the poem was being written",  rather than, "when I was writing the poem."? I am seeing more and more myself as only a tool, a conduit for what Andersen refers to as "universal mind" to pour through. All I can "do" is come to the page or the person suffering and stay open.)

The poem  was written, I believe, as a way of expressing the importance of  human connection, of being there for others so they know they are not alone.  We are all responsible for suffering in this world...and we all carry the capacity to transform it with us. Compassion not only can help others feel understood, it can open the listener up too, open the hearts of all beings up to the greatest and most powerful force in this world- Love.  We owe that compassion to every single being on this planet, including ourselves.  Hmmm!


I owe a lot of that inspiration that sat me down and opened me enough so the poem could come through to Thich Nhat Hanh and his teachings on "Listening deeply".

I am not asking people to feel guilty and ashamed of how we have and do handle suffering.  I am just asking that we look deeply into how we handle suffering.  Determine what was unhealthy and non beneficial in the past in getting us to where we really want to be...a state of openness to Love, joy and all the things, I believe,  God wants for us.

Has denying and turning our backs on suffering worked for us so far?  Maybe for all of a minute but no...we can not run away from the inevitabilities in life.  Instead of putting all our energy into running away from suffering, pushing away suffering, struggling against suffering, denying and stuffing suffering...we need to recognize it, accept it and embrace it.  Then we can look deeply into it so we can transform it.  I truly believe this is the way to go...for each and every one of us.

Hmm...But then again, what do I know for sure?  Absolutely nothing.  :)

All is well.

I Wish

Oops!  Tried to edit and revise this...maybe it wasn't meant to be...cuz I kind of made a mess lol


I Wish

I wish I could have sat with you that afternoon,

pulled a chair up close enough to you,

leaned  my open being towards you

 as the pain resurfaced

and the knots of hope that kept you going

 

unravelled.

I wish I could have been there.

 

I wish I would have been able to place,

even an awkward hand

on your knee as it bounced up and down

while  the  persistent and compelling thought

vibrated through you,

so you could feel the connection

 

of form against form

and know that your body’s borders

and your broken heart could never

 truly separate  you from others.

I wish I could have showed you

 

that you were not alone.

 

I wish I could have showed up

at the right time,

with my judgements, my ideas,

my need to hide



 behind layers of useless advice

and delusions of wisdom

tucked away somewhere,

 so I could   be for you,

someone who simply listened. 

I wish I could have offered

my   listening presence.



  I wish I could have

made you feel safe enough   

to release the
 gnawing pain you were stuffing

so deeply and ferociously inside

like some brave  but broken Sergeant

on the battle field,

trying to keep your charges  and yourself

from knowing just how afraid you really were.

I wish I could have let you know you

did not have to sacrifice yourself for peace.

 

 

I wish that I could have sat with you

in the perfection of warm and spacious  silence

allowing it to wrap itself around us and go through us,

so  you could  purge yourself

of the suffering that was eating at every cell of your being,

as it tricked you into believing

 there was no escaping from it.

I wish I could have offered  you,

a better way out.

I wish I could have nodded my head

in front of you while you spoke

so you would know that I was earnestly ,

with my eyes and my ears,

and my heart and my soul,

there to pick up the pieces of you that spilled out

all around us in the   verbal flood  of confusion,

give them back to you and

watch as you put them back into

their respective places.

I wish I could have showed you that someone cared.


 

I wish I could have rocked back and forth  

with you that afternoon,

holding your pain and your being

in my heart,

 as if it were my only child,

long enough  for you to catch your breath

and  hear what was being said

 through my own flawed and wordless articulation.

I wish I could have made you hear

what the silence had to say.

 

I wish I could have made you see,

without opening my mouth to offer

verbal trinkets and long winded explanations

about the preciousness of Life,

 
how sweet and musical  that breath  you were thinking of ending was,

how beautiful and magical that heart beat you were thinking of stopping was,

how lovely and welcoming this world you were thinking of leaving was,

how forgiving and transformative that suffering you were determined to end was,

and how perfect and divine  this being you couldn't see within you was.

I wish I could have made you see

how amazing your  Life could be.

 

I wish, I was there  in that moment

when that other  thought became so loud

 

and so demanding,

 

it was all you could hear,

all you could feel,

all you could see.

I wish I was there to  remove

 

your  trembling hand

from the object you

clung so ambivalently to,

to hold it in my own

until the thought stepped back,

until the darkness opened up a crack

to allow a soft ray of light through

 
and until the  suffocating heaviness diminished,

just enough

to make you

 

 willing to breathe another breath,

and live another day.

I wish that I was there then

 

so you could be here now.

 

 

 

©  Dale-Lyn (pen), June 2020