Let it Be

Let it be....Let it Be
Whisper words of wisdom ...Let it Be...
The Beatles

They are words of wisdom..."Let it be".  Just let it all be what it is.  If only we could remember to do that in times of trouble.  Sigh!

Let it be!

All is well.

Not Good or Bad

Wealth exists not in great possessions, but in having few wants.
Epictetus

It is not that the things we tend to desire in our misdirected way when ego is in charge are "bad".  They are neither good or bad.  The problem is our attachment to them as a means of finding the ultimate long term goal we seek. 

Money: not good or bad

There is nothing wrong or bad or evil about money, for example.  It is just paper and metal symbols. There is nothing wrong with wanting or having a big bank account or the material things that account provides. But if our "striving" for it is never ceasing because we feel we will not reach our ultimate goal without a certain amount of it, then that is a problem. 

We may  strive too hard at the expense of appreciating the very moment we are in. We may cling. We may compete.  We may defend and attack for it.  We may ironically  lose sight of what it is we are hoping to gain from the money: peace and joy and get lost in the short term goal instead.   We may then feel constantly dissatisfied and confused.  "Why am I not happy?  I got what I wanted.  I achieved my short term goal.  I guess I just must need a little more of this thing."

We go searching for more. This type of desire then intensifies and multiplies in number.

Hmmm!

Money like most things in this world is a temporary phenomena that comes and goes.  In itself it is not a problem.  The short term goal of it is not a problem.  Our attachment to outcome is.

"I will not be happy, or rest peacefully until I have a six figure bank account." 

Now that is a problem because we end up putting off the happiness and peace that is already in us, searching and striving and waiting for Life to be different than what it is this very moment. We need to be careful not to use our short term goals as fundamental stepping stones toward our future. As long as we try to "skip over" what is to get to something else...we are missing the only  time and space where joy and peace can be experienced...and that is now.

What about the possibility of never reaching that short term goal?  What happens then? What if you never get a six digit account?    You will spend your life focusing on what you don't have, feeling like failure.  Is that anyway to live?

What if it takes you fifty years of striving, working, putting off time with your family , having no fun at all ...is that a successful life? 

And what about the thing you had to do in those fifty years of attempting to meet that goal? How much of you will be in the doing when you are focusing on outcome rather than process?

Lost

If we get lost in our short term goals and fail to see what it is that we really want, we are indeed lost and helplessly dependent on something that can never ultimately make us happy to do so.

Money, like many of the things on our wish list, won't make us  happy and it cannot make us unhappy either if it is taken away or  if we have so much of it we feel overwhelmed by the pressure to hold onto it. 

It is not the money that creates joy or suffering...it is our attachment to it and our seeking something from it that it cannot give us, that keeps us from experiencing true peace and joy.  If we get the money or keep the money...it will not bring us the joy we truly hunger for. Our inability to get the money  or our losing it  is also not responsible for any sense of suffering we may experience. Not because money is a good thing or a bad thing but because it does not have the power to bless us or harm us.

Already are what we are looking for

We have actually already reached this long term goal we seek. Our natural state of being is already peaceful and joyful.  We just do not experience joy and peace  because we are so busy seeking  it in some-thing 'out there' when it is already 'in here'. Our getting lost in short term goals that are pointing in the wrong direction, our  prioritizing the need for physical gratification instead of experiencing the joy and peace of something a whole lot deeper... is the problem.

We already are what we are looking to achieve from money. We are peace and we are joy.

Hmm! I am tired...not making much sense today. lol.   All good .

It Takes Time

When I am told that it is possible to reach a certain peace of mind in no time at all, I become skeptical.  It would be like asking your physician for an injection of peace of mind.  I think the doctor would burst out laughing.
Dalai Lama ( Desk top calendar; Andrew McMeel Publsihing, 2018)

Wanting and Striving: Short Term Goals

Fulfilled desire may provide a sense of temporary satisfaction; however, the pleasure... is usually short lived. When we indulge our desires, they tend to increase in intensity and multiply in number.  We become more demanding and less content, finding it more difficult to satisfy our needs.
-Dalai Lama ( Desktop calendar, Andrew McMeel Publishing, 2018)

Hmmm!  Now those are words to ponder this morning, aren't they?

In some spiritual traditions "wanting," "craving," and "striving for" are seen as vices that hold us back from achieving spiritual enlightenment.  How does that piece of wisdom apply, then, in secular reality when few of us are striving to achieve "Buddha" status?

Well we may not be consciously striving for enlightenment but  many of us would admit to wanting to find "happiness" in our lives, would we not? Some of us, like me, just want peace of mind and freedom from the "stressors" we are living through.

Long Term Goals of Happiness and Peace

There is nothing wrong with that.

Happiness and peace are  our natural birthright.  They can be viewed as our life long goals. We are meant to be peaceful and joyful. These long term goals, however, are punctuated by many short term goals. 

Short Term Goals

It is what we choose as short term goals,  I believe the Dalai Lama is referring to, that cause the problem with being satisfied. As we attain each one, they intensify and increase in numbers and our wanting becomes more difficult to find contentment.

Misdirected short term goals

I want happiness. I therefore desire:

• perfect health
• a six digit bank account
• the perfect job
• a great house in a great neighborhood
•  a certain degree of recognition and praise
• a  relationship with an outwardly seeming perfect person
• the car of my dreams
• the ability to travel everywhere
• a Facebook family others will be envious of
• etc etc

Breaking it Down: What happens when we meet a misdirected short term goal?

When we get that perfect checkup that says we are in perfect health, we will feel pretty darn satisfied for a bit...  but it won't last.  We may look in the mirror a few weeks later and see we are aging.  Regardless of how perfectly healthy we are, we are all  going to age.  We may then desire youth and seek a reconstructive process that takes the lines out of our brow and from around our mouths.  We get that done and then  feel pretty satisfied for a while...until we notice that body parts are sagging as they are meant to at a certain part of our life spans...so we seek reconstructive surgery to repair that. We get it done and feel happy for a while.  Then we see a need for another surgery, and then  another to repair the first one we had done... And on and on it goes.

Or

After striving our whole lives we finally get that perfect job promotion that gives us a six figure salary.  Oh happy day!! Our bank account is soon full.  We get the house, the car, the recognition and reward we craved  so desperately all our lives.  Our dream has come true. We are finally there.  We can stop striving...or can we? We feel good and satisfied ...for a while. We will soon realize that  with this new position more is expected of us.  We need to work harder to keep it until we can move up to the next rung in the corporate ladder which seems to be what is also expected.  We work even harder now to get the next promotion, a bigger home, a nicer car. We will never be satisfied. Sigh!

In these examples , it is easy to see how wanting and desiring things that are so physically centered and at the mercy of natural laws because of their temporary nature, can lead us to get caught in a never ending cycle of needing and wanting more. 

What happens if things work the other way and one does not reach these short term goals or so called pinnacles of success?  

Desiring the removal of Life circumstance

In my own life, my desires were somewhat different than above. I did want things like perfect health and a "comfortable " income but I also wanted to publish books, be known as a writer. I lost both perfect health and a comfortable income (and have yet to publish a book which is irrelevant to this example lol).  The "stress" in my life was often overwhelming. So my "striving" changed gears. Instead of wanting things added, I wanted things removed.

My wanting became more of a "take this away please" kind of thing .  Many of you may relate.

I want peace of mind.  I therefore desire:

• a removal of parenting stressors from my life
• a removal of financial stressors
• a removal of this illness
• a removal of this shame related to my health seeking
• a removal of conflict
• a removal of life circumstance
• etc etc

A less demanding type of wanting?

It seems a less demanding type of wanting to some degree but it isn't.  In fact...maybe it is even more demanding. 

In my wishing, desiring and striving I am asking Life not so much to give me something...but to stop being Life and to remove something it has already given me from my experience.  The ideology here is that if I work really hard at it, put everything into controlling and fixing what is broken, Life could take away some of my parenting stressors, for example,  and I may be satisfied and "peaceful" for a while.  But It will also have to take away some precious learning opportunity for both me and my children when it does that.  I will not be peaceful for long. The much needed learning will present itself in another challenge.

If I work myself past the brink of my physical limitations and into exhaustion, Life may somehow end all my financial stress by putting money in my account but it may also have to  remove health and learning.  I won't be satisfied for long because  another similar challenge will show up in my Life that I will have to process through....and this time I will be too exhausted to deal with it.

My wanting and striving for  things to leave my life experience  is just as destructive to my growth as wanting Life to give me more, is.

External world short term goals are the problem

The problem is not in the wanting and striving to be happy ( though I am not fond of that word) or peaceful.  No that is perfectly okay...that is what we should all be striving toward.  The problem is in what we assume are the short term goals that will take us there. 

Looking out there into the external and very material world for happiness and peace is looking in the wrong direction. 

The reason why we are not satisfied for long when we get the new house or car is that those things are not what we are "really" wanting and needing.  They don't bring us closer to happiness.   The new house or car cannot give us happiness.  When we get them, something in us knows that.  They do not fill us  up.  We begin to feel dissatisfied again but instead of turning in the right direction...we just go onto the next worldly thing or goal on our list.  ...leading to more and more dissatisfaction...more and more desperation to fill in those holes...more and realizing that they don't.

The reason why the attempts made to change or end our negative  circumstances don't keep us peaceful for long is because they also  lead us in the  wrong direction.  We don't need to end challenge...we just need to go through it.  Challenges are blessing in our lives, learning opportunities and necessary for our spiritual growth.

Our short term goals need to be internal

If we truly want contentment, happiness and peace we do not need to strive for more or seek the removal of outer world things, to bring that to us.  These things can't.  We need to set some goals that will lead us in a different direction.

Look inward rather than outward.  We need to change our focus direction and create  new list short term of goals.

I want peace.  I therefore desire:

• more stillness in my day
• more quiet
• more presence
• more acceptance
• more awareness
• more appreciation
• more kindness ( that comes from me)
• more compassion
• more laughter
• more knowledge of who I am beyond all the monkey chatter in my mind
• etc etc

It is with the attainment of these goals that we will find a satisfaction that doesn't go away.  We know, finally, we are going in a direction that will take us to where we really want to be. We are on our way home.  We then become less demanding and more content with each moment Life offers us.

Hmmm!  Does that make sense?

All is well.

What does turning the other cheek look like?

Surrender is not weakness, There is great strength in it.  Only a surrendered person has spiritual power.
Eckhart Tolle ( The Power of Now, page 83)

Turning the Other Cheek

What does it look like, in the practical sense, to turn the other cheek? 

Of course the image of literally turning the left cheek toward a violent offender comes to mind but it is much deeper than that. I don't think that passage  was meant as literally as we often take it. Only the highly evolved would offer both sides of their being...their whole being....  in a real physical confrontation with a so called "enemy" or "evil doer".  Few of us are that evolved. I certainly, am not.

Can you picture yourself, in the midst of a violent attack against you, bowing your head with hands in prayer position saying "Namaste" or "peace be with you"  to your offender while they whacked you across the head?  Probably not? Nor are you expected too.

In the real world sense, I believe,  turning the other cheek refers to  an opening up and an acceptance of what is.  It is a putting down of  our shields and our weapons that we have been using to resist life with or using to  defend  this insignificant idea of self with. How better could Christ exemplify the perfection in that letting go than by comparing it to a turning of a cheek?

 Few of us will reach that level of evolving in this life time...but we will encounter many, many opportunities where we can practice allowing that which is valueless to be exposed for potential destruction, where we can practice putting away our need to resist and attack what is, and where we can practice surrendering to what life has to offer openly with our full beings.

Practicing

We can practice this in our relations with others and in our response to any  life circumstances that seem to be "attacking" us.

Each moment offers us a chance to learn. Some impatient driver, for example,  lays on the horn behind you because you hesitated to pull out into an intersection. What would you be inclined to do? Most of us would "react" in a less than Christ-like way, right?  We would possibly roll down the window and mouth or hand gesture some obscenity to alert the other driver that we are defending ourselves and fighting back. This is not turning the other cheek, this is resisting and putting ourselves in attack and defense mode to either prevent damage or repair damage to this flimsy shield of "me" we wear.

Say what, crazy lady?


We are always automatically defending and attacking on behalf of this idea of "me".   In the above example, this idea we have of ourselves as a 'good driver" is being threatened by the reaction of the  person behind us. We fear!

"If this small section  of who I believe is me  gets damaged, than maybe my whole sense of "me" will be damaged.  If I no longer have this idea of me, what will I have?  What will I be?  A nobody?"

Just that possibility makes us feel so uncomfortable.  We react, often so quickly we are not even aware we are doing it. We have quickly judged the blowing of the horn a bad thing, and the  person that is blowing it, an enemy or evil doer. We are at war.


Affirming, defending and repairing "little me"

So instinctively and often with lightening speed we retaliate in an attempt to affirm, defend or repair this idea of self we have. That is what ego does.  Ego doesn't want us turning the other cheek.  It wants us defending and attacking for everything it stands for...which ironically often does not serve us or anyone else.

An Opportunity to Learn in Relationships

We are so identified with this sense of self, of "little me", "my and mine",  that we defend and attack for it in almost every relationship we have.  We are doing this with the people we live with, work with, befriend, date or meet in passing.  As long as they help us affirm our egoic "little mes' the relations we have with them will be smooth.

If someone, however,  "attacks" our beliefs, our life styles, our nationality, our actions, however innocently...we feel threatened, don't we?  Just like we would feel threatened if they were physically attacking our bodies.  By all means if that were the case and someone was coming at us to cause physical harm or take our lives away we need to defend and even possibly attack.  But why do we attack and defend so viciously when someone tells us our "beliefs are wrong", the way we look is wrong, our work is wrong, our choices are wrong, the way we look is wrong or our thinking/feeling is wrong? We do this not only personally but collectively.  And this "feeling threatened"  is often the cause of war. 

Special , loving relationships also offer plenty of opportunity for practice. They seem so great  and conflict free until our loved one innocently attacks this idea of who we are  with, "Oh My God!  You are so messy!" or "Why do you always do that thing with your mouth?  It is so annoying." Man do we get defensive and scrappy! And if they say or do something that implies that we are not special enough or the source of their pain...we counter attack with a vengeance.  Even our loved ones can become enemies or evil doers pretty quick, can't they?

Life as the Enemy

And Life can also be seen as the enemy or evil doer. When things don't work out the way we want them to, we often feel attacked by Life, don't we? We certainly do not offer it our other cheek to beat upon. We resist what is handed to us and "struggle" and "fight" against it. If circumstance  takes away something we use to maintain that sense of self with, like our appearance, our jobs, our belongings, our health ...we fear ...and once again go on a mission to affirm, defend and repair who we think we are.

I have done that in my own life and continue to do so.  I often feel attacked by the  cartload of circumstances that seem to have landed on my lap from out of the blue. I am like wonder woman crossing my arms in front of me to deflect each bullet coming my way.  Of course, I have no golden bracelets ( if I did I would sell them to pay the bills lol) and I am no superhero. Defending against Life's bullets  is absolutely exhausting and I get hit by more than I deflect! 

What are we defending?

What the heck am I defending anyway?  This unrealistic idea I have of me as a good mom who can fix every one's problems?  This idea I had of me as a successful professional?  This idea I had of me as an extremely active and physically fit individual?    What about me as a financially independent woman?   A well respected member of the community?  There are so many gaping holes in this image now it offers me nothing anymore.

Am I lost without this image? Am I invisible or nobody? 

No..."I am" still here but "me" isn't as much as it used to be.

What I was trying so hard to defend was an illusion of me, an image that was not who I am.  It is not worth defending.  So why don't I just hand what is left of it over to my would be attackers and let them have it? What would happen if I did that?  If we all did that?

If there is truly nothing that you can do to change your here and now, and you can't remove yourself from the situation, then accept your here and now by dropping all inner resistance.  The false, unhappy self that loves feeling miserable, resentful, or sorry for itself can then no longer survive. This is called surrender.  ( Tolle, page 83)

The Gift of Surrender

If we would surrender graciously, we would realize that what we are protecting is just our "psychological form identity" (Eckhart Tolle, Omega 6)... not anything of truth or value.  It is merely an ego concept created in the mind and not substantial or worth defending.

We would realize as this image got bopped around and torn apart, as I was fortunate enough to experience,  that it never was who we are.  Who we are is much deeper and lies peacefully , undisturbed beneath all that idea we have of self.  Who we really are is much more than a fragile  image and It cannot be hurt, offended, harmed in anyway.  We would find a certain peace and mental freedom in discovering that.

Without a need to defend, we would look at our attackers, be they Life or the person bonking the horn behind us ...and not see an enemy or an evildoer.  We would simply see someone lost in their own ego or Life doing what Life is here to do.  We would realize that we are all in the same boat and would pray for that person's liberation as we pray for our own.  We would see the teacher before us and honor them as such.

Without this heavy armour  of "little me", we all so ineffectively wear, we are going to feel lighter, freer and more alive.

Without resistance, by offering our entire being through turning the other cheek,  we are going to put aside the valueless for the valuable.  We are going to finally be open and accepting of  all that Life has in store for us. 

We will find our strength in surrender.  We will embrace our spiritual power.

Hmmm!  Well that is the way I see it but then again, what do I know?

All is well.

Eckhart Tolle ( March 2016) Omega 6 .Namaste Publishing https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3zcurl7QUCw

Eckhart Tolle ( 2004) The Power of Now. Novato: Namaste Publishing

Turn the Other Cheek

But I say to you, Do not resist an evil doer. But if anyone strikes you on the right cheek, turn the other also;

Matt 5:39  NRSV

(https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Matthew+5%3A39&version=NRSV)

Hmmm!  I would almost swear someone or something is doing whatever they can so that I do not publish those words lol. They were the opening for yesterday’s blog that I put two hours of time and limited energy into to only have the post disappear.  And this morning there was one glitch after another, both on site and in Microsoft document, leading to over thirty minutes just to get that passage down.  This is not going to be a smooth writing experience.

But that’s okay because today I would like to write about “tolerance”.  The Dalai Lama’s quote for today on my desk top calendar reads: In the practice of tolerance, one’s enemy is the best teacher. (Andrews McMeel Publishing, 2018).  Is it not fitting that I actually publish an entry about turning the other cheek on the day I read that quote?

The enemy or “evil doer”

So before I begin explaining what I think Jesus’s words, thusly being echoed by the Dalai Lama’s words, mean….let’s understand what I believe is meant by “enemy” or “evil doer.”

I much prefer “evil doer” to enemy or as described in many other versions of the bible, “evil person”.  I hate labelling people by their actions…just because a person does what we believe to be bad or evil…it doesn’t make them evil.  I don’t believe there are evil people in the world, just people who do nasty things.  I see these individuals as unconscious, un-evolved, lost in ego, and acting “insanely” or “stupidly” at the time of their action…not evil. And enemy is only a concept…it is a judgement we make based on circumstances…totally relative. What we may refer to as an enemy, someone else is referring to as an ally…and we, without meaning to are likely enemies to someone somewhere…right now.

Our egos tend to make “enemies” and “evil doers” out of anyone or anything that threatens our sense of self.  And I believe that is what the above bible passage is actually reflecting.  It teaches metaphorically how we should respond when that sense of self (not just the flesh on our cheek) is threatened.

What is this sense of self?

This sense of self is who we believe we are in the body we are in, the mind we are using and the persona we have worked so hard to create.  It is in reality nothing more than “idea” we have of ourselves and an idea we want others to have of us. It is based on thought and image…created by years of conditioning, attaining (or losing), owning ( or not having),socially accepted success (or failure), conforming ( or nonconforming), “fitting in” ( or social rejection) etc etc.  It is a compilation of our learning or what we have experienced or told we ‘should’ be in order to meet outer world expectation.   It is not who we really are!

Our sense of “little me” is a flimsy outer garment we wear and that we have come to believe is us. Because of that it is fragile…easily bruised and wounded.  It hurts like the dickens when it gets slapped around by circumstances or other egos.

How does the so called “evil doer” threaten or damage this sense of self.

The passage, I believe, is not so much referring to what happens when   the body is being attacked and when our very survival is threatened.  Like many of Christ’s teachings…it is more metaphorical than that. Life or another ego may not give us what we were expecting or believed it should…we feel threatened, cheated, and struck with an enemy’s blow.  People may attack our personal beliefs, or our fragile sense of belonging to a collective belief system, which acts as the glue that keeps us together and it feels like we received another rattling blow…we begin to come apart.

The  “evil doer” (be it another being or circumstance) may take away something we believe helps to keep this idea we have of self  intact…our belongings, our  jobs, our looks, our reputation, or our physical health…another blow to the cheek that may actually knock us down.

How do we respond?

Every time Life or the egos of others fail to give us what we feel they “should” in order to keep this sense of self together…we make enemies and “evil doers’ out of them because they are putting holes in our personas. We fear we will be reduced to invisible nobodies without this “idea” of who we are. We have a tendency then to do whatever we can to further affirm this idea of “me”, to protect it, defend it and repair it whenever it is threatened or damaged.  We do that by creating borders around self (both the individual and the collective), defending “self” and what is considered “mine”, or “attacking” before or after we are attacked.  In order to do that, we create distinct borders between us and them.  We need to judge and label our enemies and determine what is “good” and what is “evil”. We, then, put a large amount of our energy into “war” be it personal or worldly.

We do not often do…as Jesus teaches…turn the other cheek.  We are seldom tolerant as the Dalia Lama advises we should be. We are not at peace.  We are not open to Life and what each moment offers us…instead we are resistant to it and constantly on guard. We make what shows up in the moment...the enemy. Is that how we really want to live?

Jesus teaches us that what we are defending is not worth defending or repairing.  This little egoic me is not who we are…we are so much more. Let it be slapped around by our so called enemies.  They are actually doing us a favour by creating holes in something that is hiding who we are from us.  The cheek is nothing of value.  The ego and idea we have of ourselves is nothing of value.. Every time something that is valueless is taken away from us, we are getting closer to what is valuable.  

Nothing real can be threatened,

Nothing unreal exists

Herein lies the peace of God.(ACIM Introduction)

I believe, He is teaching us to be so open to what life has in store for us, be it “good” or be it “evil" , that we are willing to turn the other cheek to it…knowing in our very core it cannot hurt who we really are. Our enemies, be they life circumstance or other beings on this planet, are our greatest teachers.  They teach us tolerance….and with tolerance we will find freedom in knowing who we truly are.

All is well!

 

My post disappeared...I mean totally? What the...that is s bizarre...

Happy Thanksgiving to all who are celebrating today!!!  May your hearts be full of appreciation and your lives full of reasons to be so.

Still it

Still it

Still it
before it is gone

hold your trembling finger 
to  the shutter

feel the perfection
of silence

sink into
the healing pause
that exists
between
each  anxious breath

Release...
let go....
and capture what is before you

still the moment

wrap its essence up
in a beautiful container
 of presence

take it beyond your eye
your glass
your mind
and into your very being

then...
and only then
pass it on

let your life become a
transparent offering
of what is

 c Dale-Lyn October 2019
(as inspired by Eckhart Tolle's words this morning https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3zcurl7QUCw  and my love of photography)

Delicious Autumn! My very soul is wedded to it, and if I were a bird I would fly about the earth seeking the successive autumns.
George Eliot

The Need for Acceptance of Life and Love

Accept the things to which fate binds you, and love the people whom fate brings you together, but do so with all your heart.
-Marcus Aurelius (Brainy Quote)

My learning keeps bringing me back to this: all our so called problems with life are in our minds and in our minds only.  There are two things that hold us back from being "free", expanding,  joyous, peaceful and embracing the here and now. Those two things are:

• Resistance to what is
• the "little me" the ego has created with its "me, my and mine " focus.

Dealing with Resistance

So what do we do about it?  We learn to put down our resistance and do what Tao Lzu teaches....become as soft and supple as water.  We let go and accept. 

"What?  You want us to give up?"

In a way...yes...but there is a big difference between giving up and letting go.  I am by no means encouraging anyone to curl up in a ball in the fetal position and stay there.  I simply mean...we need to let go of our resistance.  We need to stop fighting and struggling against what is...against the moment...against Life.  Let go of the resistance and the struggle.  Accept what is not yours to control!

I love the Serenity prayer (so much so...I named my yoga studio "Serenity Yoga").

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change...the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.

There is very little, "out there"  that we can change, that we have a "right" to change or that will make the real "problem"  go away if we do change it.  If there are changes to be made, they are likely internal changes that involve the way we think.

Life is not out to get us.  In fact there is very little personal in it.  We therefore, do not have to struggle to keep some sort of a status quo.  We do not need to resist it...we just need to change the way we think about it.  We need to put away "this is bad...it therefore must be fought off, pushed away or fixed," mentality.

Resistance is so very draining! And it isn't effective, is it?  How many times has your crying out "Oh no!" changed the situation you were in? All the energy we put into resisting "what is" could be better spent living, don't you think?

That living begins with accepting the moment for all it offers...be it sunshine or rain...pleasure or pain...joy or sadness. A certain relief comes when we finally get that and we put down our heavy shields and our weapons of attack, when we put down our need to fight the moment as if it were an enemy....when we just accept it for whatever it is.  We become lighter, freer.

Hmmm!

Go Beyond the "Little me" mentality

We also need to realize at some point that "it isn't all about me." Life isn't that personal. There is almost 8 billion people on this planet and trillions of other beings. Earth is just one planet in a solar system and our solar system is just one in an infinite galaxy of more.  We are not being signalled out for the "bad things" that happen.  They just happen.

This "me...me" focus doesn't protect us from pain and suffering...it makes it worse.  With the more me, my and mine...the more separation, competition, defense and attack that takes place.  This leads to more isolation and a disconnect from each other and from the source of all Life. More "bad things" are bound to happen.  Our "little me" focus is pulling the world into darkness instead of toward the light of understanding I believe we are here to find.

Most of us know by now, how good it feels, how right it feels when we are selflessly caring for another.  It feels good for a reason...it is our natural inclination. We need to care more for others...all others...not just those who help keep this idea of "little me" thriving.  We do not need to build more borders or weapons of destruction that go against our nature...we need to build more compassion and acts of kindness. We do not need more devices that disconnect...we need more connection!

Anyway...I digress.  That is the learning I am left with: If we want to heal ourselves and therefore the world...we need to stop resisting and we need to expand beyond the little me.

But who am I and what do I know? :)

All is well!

In a Sacred Manner

Do everything in a sacred manner....honor the now!
-Eckhart Tolle

The Photos

I finally got out to shoot on Thursday!!! Oh man I missed having a camera in my hands. And it was the most amazing day with the most amazing scenery. The colours...OMG!  The camera loved them.  If it wasn't for those captured colours, it was the type of day that could make the most amateurish of us an Ansel Adams. Our province is absolutely breathtaking in autumn. So very grateful

 I can't get the details about what I shot these in for some reason. Sure it was aperture priority with about a 55mm lens.  ISO 200...not sure what SS or f stop. As if you really wanted to know lol.

The Quote

I was thinking about that man in the photos when I came across that quote.  He is often in a state of "pre-thought" and though it can be concerning and even infuriating at those times I allow my ego to resist his nature...for the most part I am so envious! He can be so connected to the now.  He treats it as sacred and he honors it without even trying to.  He doesn't seem to have to work his way through a thick dense cloud of thinking, analyzing, judging, condemning and can just be so there, like he was in these shots. (He wasn't posing lol...all shots are candid....which I so prefer).  He radiates peace and nature welcomes him like one of her own.

Sigh!  I, on the other hand, need a pick axe, chisel  and a saw to get through the thinking in my head....especially after an incident that occurred after our nature experience. :) I find myself too often, using this moment as a means to the next...rushing through it, without appreciating what I am doing in each here and now. 

If we treat the moment as sacred we would honor it and see the beauty in it.  We wouldn't view it and use it as if it was just something in our way, would we? Each step, on this path would be something to respect and honor.

I am just so grateful I had a few hours to reconnect with the earth and landscape, to get my bearings, to find myself "Present" before I once again had to deal with what I dealt with.  And I am grateful for having this man in my life and for what he can teach me about simply being there.

All is well!

Let it be so completely that labels are not necessary in the mind.
Eckhart Tolle


Eckhart Tolle (March 2016) Eckhart Tolle Omega 7. Namaste Publishing https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZMGdZ7bWHuU&spfreload=5

Resistance to Learning

As human beings we all want to be happy and free from misery...We have learned that the key to happiness is inner peace.
-Dalai Lama

Have we all learned that?

No, last night reminds me that we haven't and there are some people who are actively resisting that truth.  Why?  They are reaching out for external means by which to numb and end suffering. What they choose as a means causes more suffering for themselves and others. When one asks them to choose differently, the resistance is so immense it knocks one down. It is resistance that keeps  them in misery

It is a vicious cycle , as an observer and bystander, I don't know how to break.  It isn't my job to break it anyway.  The creator of the cycle is the one who must break it but when they do not want to for whatever reason....their circling creates a vortex that pulls us all in. It is such a chaotic mess...and personally, even though this really isn't about "me", I am completely exhausted by it.

I am not exhausted by the illness, or even the behaviour that so often results from choices...I am exhausted by the resistance to getting better...the 101 reasons why this person has to do what they do and how any...any...other suggestion is not even worth trying because it just won't work or as often said,  "I don't want to do that."

Sigh! How does one help in that situation?

All will be well.

Keep It Simple...Sister

They should think their (course) food sweet; their (plain) clothes beautiful; their (poor) dwellings places of rest; and their common (simple)  ways sources of enjoyment.
-Lao Tzu ( Chapter /Verse 80...translation of Tao Te Ching by James Legge...1895)

Hmm!

It is challenging for most of us to do that, isn't it?  We too often live in a perpetual state of needing/wanting/ striving for more, don't we?

I spent the last five - seven years lamenting over what I was losing, focusing on scarcity and comparison making as material things were disappearing from my life: a career, secure income,  savings, investments, titles, designations etc.  Even my dwelling, which became poorer in appearance with my inability to maintain it the way I  wanted to, was on the line of disappearing as well. I lamented about that...I was looking at how much others seem to have around me and not focusing on the fact that I actually had more than many. I thought I needed a certain amount of material abundance to be okay and until I got it back or stopped it from being taken away, I would not be okay. What I had was not enough!

Well...it was only not enough in my mind, a mind  that could never seem to be content with the "simple" ...with what is.  The Universe more or less teaching me to Keep It Simple ...Sister.

I had food though maybe course.  I had clothing though maybe plain.  I had a place of rest and I had a means of enjoyment through the simple things around me.  That was all I needed...all I ever needed and it took me some time to realize that.

As long as we are striving for more and discontent with where we are and what we have...we cannot find peace , joy, wellness (what many of us call 'happiness').  Where I find my delight these days is not in "things" but in healing my mind.

Hmmm! All is well!

If one's life is simple, contentment has to come.  Simplicity is extremely important for happiness. Having few desires, feeling satisfied with what you have, is very vital - satisfaction with just enough food, clothing, and shelter to protect yourself from the elements.  And finally there is an intense delight in abandoning faulty states of mind and in cultivating helpful ones in meditation.
-Dalai Lama (Insight from the Dalai Lama calendar (2018) Andrew McMeel Publishing)

Mentally Skunked

The Guest House

This being human is a guest house.
Every morning a new arrival.

A joy, a depression, a meanness,
some momentary awareness comes
as an unexpected visitor.

Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they’re a crowd of sorrows,
who violently sweep your house
empty of its furniture,
still, treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out
for some new delight.

The dark thought, the shame, the malice,
meet them at the door laughing,
and invite them in.

Be grateful for whoever comes,
because each has been sent
as a guide from beyond.

Rumi (as translated by Coleman Barks) 

 

I sit here feeling the rumble of a host of uninvited  guests in my guest house.  I don't like the energy they bring and I want them to leave.  But I guess they are here for a reason and I must play the gracious host.

(Man...I am resisting those big white blocks that come when I cut and paste lol)

Skunked!

I was awakened at six by two skunked dogs who jumped back up on the bed with me after passing by the oblivious perceptions of the person who let them in. I resisted that moment big time, let me tell ya!

Resisting What Is

After a somewhat disturbed sleep ( ticker acting up a bit) I really wanted to sleep in.  I wanted this situation  to be handled by anyone other than me. I tried the pillow over my head thing but nope...wasn't going to work. I tried the yelling out and transfer of responsibility  thing; "Your dogs are skunked!"...that wasn't going to cut it either.  I then tried hiding somewhere beneath the thick cloud of curse words that were suddenly bumping around in my head...but no...the stench still reached me.

Being the only one who thinks she knows how to handle this type of situation (because I am usually the only one that does) and  being the only one who seemed to see a need for it to be handled...I dragged myself from bed, my jaw tight from resentment, my tone curt and demanding and I proceeded to very reluctantly handle the crisis.

As soon as I approached them with the bucket of prewash, the two recipients of  an unwilling prey's fight and flight response knew what type of guests I had in me.  They looked up at me with watering  eyes that said: "Oh Crap! "

They did not fight me, they simply cowered down  and allowed me to take the bubbling concoctions I created to them as I growled about how at this point they should know better. 

" After five sprayings, you should realize that those black and white  cats with the fluffy tails are not worth the thrill of chase they seem to give you."  With heads down with shame, they allowed me to rub my concoction into them.

" Learn from your mistakes!" I went on later when I had them in the tub, where   I scrubbed and rinsed, choking on the odor myself.  "Blah, blah, blah, blah"

No Learning!

They just listened to my in depth and very articulate argument with blank eyes and tail between their legs.  There would be  no learning.   So when they were finally freed from the tub and shook the remains of their morning's experience all over me, they walked away no further enlightened than they were earlier that morning.  They left me, their teacher, with nothing but  soaking wet slippers,  a nose full of a stench that would be with me for days, a head full of curse words and a guest house full of unwanted guests. Sigh! I have a hard time when other beings do not learn from their mistakes.

Hmmm! I have a hard time when I don't learn from my own mistakes!

I realize that once again, I  became rigid and firm, resistant to what is. I was resisting the life experience(the dogs getting skunked on a morning I wasn't feeling 100%)  and I was resisting the emotional and mental experience ...(the guests in my guest house ). My resistance did not do anything but make the morning, the moment harder than it had to be.

What If?

What if, the next time this happens, and it will happen again...I were to laugh at the situation and invite all the guests at my door in with that laughter? What if I were to get up and instead of a tight jaw, I put a smile on my face? What if I noticed the way I was feeling and was simply okay with it? What is I was open to whatever Life put in front of me and was amused and entertained by it rather than frustrated? What if I simply stopped resisting what is?  What would my moment, my morning, and my Life be like then?

I want to be a guest house where I can laugh with all my guests and one "I" can be content in.  What about you?

Rumi. The Guest House from https://www.scottishpoetrylibrary.org.uk/poem/guest-house/

The Final Verses of Tao Te Ching

With all the sharpness of the Way of Heaven; It injures not; with all the doing in the way of the sage, he does not strive.
-Lao Tzu (last line of Legge's translation of  Tao Te Ching)


Without intending to I have been doing eight verses of the Tao a month.  I mean, I know I was translating a translation but I didn't realize I was doing it monthly lol.  Anyway... I thought I would finish them up.

Verse/Chapter 75

The only reason why people suffer famine is because of the amount of taxes their  superiors charge them so they can live in wealthy excess. This awareness of inequality makes the people hard to govern.  They do not fear death and that cannot be used as a means to control them.  They make light of death because they are starving.  What have they got to lose when do not set a high value on their lives?

Note:  I may have implied too much here in my own translation of the translation.

My Take Away: We cannot govern and lead others in an effective way if we are more interested in exploiting the little they have for our own material gains. If we put them in a situation where they have so little they are fighting to survive eventually their lives will mean little.  A better and more equal distribution of wealth will be more effective?

Verse/ Chapter  76

Man is supple and weak at birth, strong and firm at death as it is with all of nature. The concomitants of death are strength and firmness; the concomitants of life are softness and weakness. It is the strength of a tree that leads it to be cut down.  If we rely solely on our strengths we will not conquer. The place of what is firm and strong is below (inferior?) and the place that is soft and weak
(vulnerable?) is superior?

My Take Away: I think this means when we are more accepting...supple and weak... like a newborn we are more likely to conquer the adversities of life??? It is firmness and strong resistance, maybe, that leads to man's downfall.

Verse/ Chapter 77

The Way is compared to the bending of a bow. That which was high is brought low and that which was low is raised up.  Heaven diminishes where there is superabundance and supplements where there is deficiency. This is the way of Heaven, not the way of man.  Man tends to take from those who have less to add to his own superabundance. Only those who are in possession of the Toa will take their superabundance and share it with all. Therefore the [evolved?] ruling sage does not wish to display his superiority by claiming that the results of sharing are his or by being arrogant.

My Take Away: Equal distribution, and harmony is the way of Heaven.  Competing for more at the expense of his brothers is the way of man. Only those who follow the Way will do as heaven does.

Verse/Chapter 78

By witnessing the way water is able to overcome the strongest, everyone knows that the soft overcomes the hard and the weak is strong ...yet no one is able to carry it out in practice.

Really don't understand this part that Legge has put into verse:

Therefore, the sage has said,

"He who  accepts his state's reproach

has hailed therefore its altars lord;

to him who bears men's direful woes

They all the name of King's accord."

 

If you accept what the state is doing you are making the men responsible for such suffering a lord under the King's orders?  Have to look at this some more.

 

Words that are strictly true seem to be paradoxical? Nothing makes sense.

My Take Away: ??

 

Verse/ Chapter 79

 

When conflict between two parties is supposedly resolved, the one who was wrong still tends to hold a grudge so this really doesn't benefit the other party [those that were wronged]. To guard against this the sage keeps the "left hand" portion of the record and does not expect that the retributions to the wronged party take place right away. If a man has the attributes of the Toa he looks at the agreement very objectively without emotion and if he doesn't he only looks at the parts of the agreement that suit him selfishly.

 

In the Way of Heaven there is no partiality to Love; it is always on the side of the good man.

My Take Away: As above

 

 

Verse/ Chapter 80

 

This was a bit perplexing:

 

If ruling a small population "I" [ the leader? Lao Tzu?] would not make people use their abilities for profit (?) nor would I allow them to avoid looking at death even if they feared it. There should be no escaping what is????(My take).  Even though they had carriages to get away, they would not need to use them; even though they had weapons to fight with or defend with , they would not need to. I would make them return to knotted cords?...a way of calculating and expressing without characters or words. Maybe, indicating a need to go back to a simpler time.

 

They should find peace with what they have and where they are at not seeing the "lack, coarseness or plainness" in them.  And even though there may be a neighboring state that they cannot help to be aware of...they will never have the need to go there or have "intercourse with it".

 

My Take Away: I am assuming this is about being satisfied with what one has right here and now and not needing or wanting more.

 

Verse/Chapter 81

 

 

Sincere words are not fine and fine words are not sincere:

 

Sincerity does not come with how well a person articulates as knowledge about the Tao does not come with how much a person supposedly learned about It.

 

Those who know the Toa do not dispute it or argue about it and those who argue do not know it.

 

What the Sage gives, the sage receives.

 

Even though the Way is sharp...It never injures. And no matter what the sage does he does not strive.

My Take Away:  Knowing the Tao is about living it...not talking about it, not arguing in defense of it, not "taking" from it and not striving to "do". ...more about being it?

 

The End!

 

So much wisdom.  Will come back at some point to summarize my learning!  All is well.  

 

 

Legge https://www.sacred-texts.com/tao/taote.htm





Frustrations on the Roller Coaster

There are going to be frustrations in life.  The question is not: how do I escape?  It is: How can I use this as something positive.
-Dalai Lama ( from Desktop calendar...Andrew McMeel Publishing)

Lately, I have been walking a line between frustration and contentment. It is a funny experience to be so on the line when I have spent years of my life going from one emotional intensity to another. I thought life was supposed to be an up and down roller coaster ride and our job was to "do" whatever we could to go up and to do whatever we could to avoid going down. We looked for the highs and did what ever we could to escape the lows.

Of course, that was a strange approach... in this analogy of  a roller caster . We have no control over the ride, do we?  Some One else is operating the  controls and we...if we are smart...are strapped into our seats.  We are going to hit the inclines and the declines of life whenever the ride determines it. The only choice we have is:  Do we want to spend the entire ride  covering  our eyes and screaming  for it  to be over or do we want to learn to  put our arms up in the air and laugh  in excitement  and joy as each downward drop takes us unexpectedly?

The ride is meant to be an amazing and fun one.  But if we have spent most of our lives to date fear based, for whatever reason...it is going to take some time before we get excited over all the dips and rotations. We need to simply begin by taking our hands off our eyes.

Eventually, if we play this right, the ride will become a smooth one...not because the controller has taken away all challenges but because we stop reacting so much to each down ( or to each up). I may not be screaming in excitement and joy at every downward drop lol but I am not dreading or cringing over each drop either.

 I cannot say that I am completely content  with the challenges of my life nor am I overwhelmed with frustration either. I am no longer trying to escape and get off the ride.  I recognize the potentially frustrating situation that may arise for what it is, sigh, accept it in and try to see the positive in it.  I have a ways to go before I master that and am able to throw my arms up in the air at every curve ball thrown my way but I am getting there.

I also notice that I do not react so much to the things that used to excite me.  In fact, I often wonder why they ever excited me in the first place.  I kind of like the smoothness of the ride I am on right now.

I am indeed riding  on ( wobbling on...still do not have complete balance) this smooth line between frustration and contentment.  I guess this ride is called "peace".  I can live with that. :)

All is well

Disenchanted

A true teacher would never tell you what to do.
-Christopher Pike

Oh my!  Oh My!  Oh my! 

Bowing to the Guru?

I have always said that I follow  lessons and not the teacher, right?  I do not bow down and worship the ones who carry and pass on  messages.  I can't even say I revere them in the way they do in India. It is customary there to honor and show great respect for one's chosen Guru.  It is actually a Yoga thing. I, on the other hand, try to know as little as I can about them personally so I can focus solely on the message. I don't want to judge or be biased of the learning they offer  by knowing too much information about them as messengers.   If what they say resonates with me, great...  I take that learning inside and I process it there.

Now, I do  respect their missions as human beings, maybe, but I am cautious of how that mission is carried out. I separate message from messenger.  I would never jump into a teacher's following even though I may like what they say and how they teach. I absorb the message but not them.(Or at least I didn't think I did).  Being embodied in human forms, I know that egos can quickly take over a teaching mission (or even begin it) regardless of how pure and essential that message is.

Thin Line between  Guru Worship and a Cult Following

This is how the so called "cult" comes about. We have to be very, very careful about Guru worship and the motivation behind the teaching!  I have been , incidentally, interested in the socialization of cults and how people get lost in them for years now.  For that reason, I prefer to seek  in my own environment in my own way for fear of getting lost in such  socialized ideology behaviour.

Disenchanted

 I bring this up now because I am disenchanted.  I am feeling like a beautiful message I have received is now tainted because I have come to learn that the person who brought it to me via   his writing and translation of Patanjali's sutras was deemed a cult leader and involved in some very unethical and other-damaging actions.  This is not new...the allegations have been out for over a decade. I just didn't know it because I haven't researched the messenger.

This is the third or forth time this has happened.  I would be reading or listening to someone for a while, very interested in what they had to say and how they said it, quoting them and referring to their words often,  and then the information about their antics would somehow land  on my lap or I would notice a Rolex on a wrist, a Hummer or Rolls Royce in the background.   I would then suddenly  find myself jumping up and away from their teachings as if   a basket of pythons was just emptied on my lap rather than hearsay and allegations about their personal antics. This did not meet my expectation of a teacher of Truth.

Paranoid?

I am not sure if it is  my ego or my wise Self making me acutely aware of ego in these individuals who apparently claim to be egoless. I don't know if it is conditioned paranoia or legitimate concern but I watch for hidden egos in others who lead.  I do not believe there is room for it in those positions.  Though I may listen to a few favorites as they teach...I do not follow anyone for that reason. Nor do I follow one train of teaching.  I love the philosophy of yoga, but I also love many of the teachings of Christianity, Judaism, Taoism, Islam and Buddhism. I see a glorious link amongst them all. I do not want to follow one person or one train of thought.  What does that make me, I wonder.

What I do know is that I am very weary of ego...in others and in my self.

Ego in the Leader


I see ego in those who are reaping great personal material abundance while their so called  followers have so little especially when teaching how unimportant materiality is. 

I see ego  in the need to be revered...this individual allowed others to kiss his feet and bow to him.  Now having a picture up of a respected teacher  as a reminder of what you learned  is okay, as is seen in Hindu tradition, but to have pictures up absolutely everywhere is a conditioning action I believe, that comes from ego.

And to tell a person what to do, think and how to feel, to me, is the ultimate no-no and that which defines a cult leadership....especially when what you tell them to do is unethical ( harmful to others/self) and hypocritical. Even if that telling is done in a very covert way as in subtle manipulation, it is not okay. A true teacher would not tell another what to think, feel or do...they would get the person to look inside themselves and determine what thy were thinking, feeling and desiring to do.

Using others for  the satisfaction of one's own ego needs is not what leadership and mentorship is all about. It makes the perfect recipe fro a cult.

Ego in Me

I  don't want my own ego in the way judging and condemning things I do not understand either. I don't know everything that is going in these places devoted to one leader.   I just know that when the teacher becomes more important than the "original" teachings, there is a problem. At the same time,   I still want to see and appreciate the beauty of the message even when I back away from the messenger. Can I do that?

Is Yoga tainted?

His message is still beautiful. In fact,  it wasn't even his message actually...but his human behaviour (if the allegations are true) are now in the way of the transmission of that message to me.  It feels tainted. Yoga...being that all my disenchantment to date seems to come from leaders in Yoga lately and it is that Yogic culture that promotes Guru worship ...feels somewhat tainted to me.

I feel very confused right now.  Disenchanted. I need time to rethink the message as I put away the works of the messenger.

I need some time to process but I really want to get back to this subject of cults and Guru worship someday very soon.  It is a very interesting phenomena in human behaviour, don't you think? :)

All is well.

Awe! Autumn

Autumn is a second spring when every leaf is a flower.

Albert Camus

 

Writer's Block

Every noble work is bound to face problems and obstacles.  It is important to check your goal and motivation thoroughly.  ...One's actions should be good for others, and for oneself as well.  Once a positive goal is chosen, you should decide to pursue it all the way to the end.  Even if it is not realized, at least there will be no regret.
-Dalai Lama (from Insights from the Dali Lama Calendar (2018)Andrew McMeel Publishing)

Yesterday I wrote about writer's block and the personal reasons why I experience it in the writing of my sister's story. I later  saved that entry  as a draft because there was too much "me-me" story in it. Anyway, I am blocked not only in the writing but the remembering and the healing. I am facing the "problems" and "obstacles" his holiness speaks of.  And now I need to check my goal and motivation for writing this.

Is this, first of all a 'noble work'?  What makes a noble work? That which is good for others and for oneself.  Hmmm!

Is this good for others?

I began to write this for my sister thinking it would be good for her but she is no longer alive.  Wherever she is now, will this still be good for the essence she is/was? I wanted to honor her memory, tell the story she never had a chance to tell the world.  Really what good does it do her now? 

I also wonder why I want to put memories down on paper. What is a memory but a wisp of stored thought, often fragmented and distorted, a clinging to an idea of time that removes us from the only life there is right here and right now...? 

How can I put her memories down when memories are so unique to the person perceiving?  Even though we shared a past our perception of it differs, our experiences differ. They would have to be my memories, what I perceived and what I can recall in my own fragmented recollections. Will that be good for her memory?

Does it do any good to tell this story?  What will it do to the memory of others in the story who are painted as victimizers?  How will those still clinging to some "ideals" they have of our shared past  feel when painful truths recalled from another threaten to break those walls down?

Hmmm! It will be truthful, honest and reasonable I hope and truth is always good for others, isn't it? It also may offer some inspiration and motivation for healing in others who have experienced something similar.  And I am so determined that it will be well written, even if I have to rewrite each chapter 100 times,  so  it will be a book worth reading.

Is it good for me?

I often fear that my ego is actually motivating this work rather than spirit.  Ego wants to write a great story that will publish and sell, giving "me" literary acclaim.  It knows, indeed, that truth is often stranger (and more sellable) than fiction. I don't want that to be the reason I pursue this.  If that is my motivation, it is not a "noble work".

I do, however, want to tell "my" story through my sister's.  It is easier to do it that way.  Yet, can I, in good conscious, use my sister to do that? Is it selfish or just mutually beneficial?

I do need to heal.  She would want that. And writing has always been my medium for expression, healing, transformation.  So writing this story could ultimately be good for me. Couldn't it?

It is helping me to remember certain things that were locked away for decades.

Hmmm!

Pursue it all the way

I already have the half way word count in...45,000 words...halfway there.  I need to do as the Dalai Lama suggests and pursue it all the way.  I have always had this strong compulsion to finish whatever I started.  I have always been good at doing that.  I need to finish this and I will.

Even if it is not realized

Even if it doesn't publish and remains on my desk with all the other unpublished manuscripts I have... it will be okay...I will have done some healing, some remembering, some little honor to my sister...even if it stays between the two of us. How can I regret that?

All is well

Not in the Doing

Life is not in the doing, it is in the being.
-Eckhart Tolle

"What do I do? What do I do?",  we often ask when we feel frightened, anxious, unsettled or even just bored.  We have this compulsion to "do something" to change the situation, to fix the circumstances, to manipulate the event outside of us so we can change the way we feel inside.  We are so determined to do something.  Doing something seems to be the only possible  solution at least at  the time of question. 

I often have that question posed to me by a loved one who is suffering. As soon as she begins to feel anxious, unsettled she begins to ask that question in a very desperate way. She wants me to tell her what to do.  I, unfortunately, do not give her what she feels she needs.  I usually respond automatically and sincerely with, "Nothing...you do not have to do anything.  Just be with it." 

Let me tell ya that seldom goes over very well. In fact, she often sees that response as cold indifference from someone who doesn't understand.  She accuses me of being uncaring and hiding behind a Buddhist front. (Why does everyone automatically assume one is a Buddhist if they say things like that, lol?)  I do not defend or argue with her. I can only sigh at those times and nod my head.

Her fixed belief that doing is necessary leads her to make choices that are often far from healthy.  Sitting and just  being with her emotional experience is not something she will even consider. She feels that her moment  has to be fixed and ended right away in any way it can be!!!

I cannot explain to her what many, many teachers including Tolle teach about spacious presence, about  learning to bring a different consciousness to the moment rather than doing it away. I cannot explain to her about the importance of just accepting where you are right now,  how the end of fear will never be found out there in numbing activity but in the silence and stillness of being.  I can't explain to her that there is no running from fear and sadness...they are temporary life experiences that every human faces and that the more we run from these things the more taken over by doing and suffering we become. no ...she resists those suggestions and once again will ask, "What do I do?"

Hmmm!  I just sigh, nod my head and say, "I don't know.  What do you think you need to do?" That usually doesn't go over very well either.

All is well.


Eckhart Tolle 2019 Ego: The Mountain and the Valley. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9NbmbX5YV-8

Oh the mind is such a funny thing!

I wanted to write so badly  about "being" and "doing", how it was so important to do from a place of being but I got so caught up in doing for the sake of doing I wasn't being and now I cannot seem to do what I sat down here to do because I can no longer find the  doing or the being in it. lol 

How is that for a mind twister?

I am going to go regroup with the dogs in a place it all makes sense and I will be back.

It's all good...a little cra-cra maybe... but good !