Mentally Skunked

The Guest House

This being human is a guest house.
Every morning a new arrival.

A joy, a depression, a meanness,
some momentary awareness comes
as an unexpected visitor.

Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they’re a crowd of sorrows,
who violently sweep your house
empty of its furniture,
still, treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out
for some new delight.

The dark thought, the shame, the malice,
meet them at the door laughing,
and invite them in.

Be grateful for whoever comes,
because each has been sent
as a guide from beyond.

Rumi (as translated by Coleman Barks) 

 

I sit here feeling the rumble of a host of uninvited  guests in my guest house.  I don't like the energy they bring and I want them to leave.  But I guess they are here for a reason and I must play the gracious host.

(Man...I am resisting those big white blocks that come when I cut and paste lol)

Skunked!

I was awakened at six by two skunked dogs who jumped back up on the bed with me after passing by the oblivious perceptions of the person who let them in. I resisted that moment big time, let me tell ya!

Resisting What Is

After a somewhat disturbed sleep ( ticker acting up a bit) I really wanted to sleep in.  I wanted this situation  to be handled by anyone other than me. I tried the pillow over my head thing but nope...wasn't going to work. I tried the yelling out and transfer of responsibility  thing; "Your dogs are skunked!"...that wasn't going to cut it either.  I then tried hiding somewhere beneath the thick cloud of curse words that were suddenly bumping around in my head...but no...the stench still reached me.

Being the only one who thinks she knows how to handle this type of situation (because I am usually the only one that does) and  being the only one who seemed to see a need for it to be handled...I dragged myself from bed, my jaw tight from resentment, my tone curt and demanding and I proceeded to very reluctantly handle the crisis.

As soon as I approached them with the bucket of prewash, the two recipients of  an unwilling prey's fight and flight response knew what type of guests I had in me.  They looked up at me with watering  eyes that said: "Oh Crap! "

They did not fight me, they simply cowered down  and allowed me to take the bubbling concoctions I created to them as I growled about how at this point they should know better. 

" After five sprayings, you should realize that those black and white  cats with the fluffy tails are not worth the thrill of chase they seem to give you."  With heads down with shame, they allowed me to rub my concoction into them.

" Learn from your mistakes!" I went on later when I had them in the tub, where   I scrubbed and rinsed, choking on the odor myself.  "Blah, blah, blah, blah"

No Learning!

They just listened to my in depth and very articulate argument with blank eyes and tail between their legs.  There would be  no learning.   So when they were finally freed from the tub and shook the remains of their morning's experience all over me, they walked away no further enlightened than they were earlier that morning.  They left me, their teacher, with nothing but  soaking wet slippers,  a nose full of a stench that would be with me for days, a head full of curse words and a guest house full of unwanted guests. Sigh! I have a hard time when other beings do not learn from their mistakes.

Hmmm! I have a hard time when I don't learn from my own mistakes!

I realize that once again, I  became rigid and firm, resistant to what is. I was resisting the life experience(the dogs getting skunked on a morning I wasn't feeling 100%)  and I was resisting the emotional and mental experience ...(the guests in my guest house ). My resistance did not do anything but make the morning, the moment harder than it had to be.

What If?

What if, the next time this happens, and it will happen again...I were to laugh at the situation and invite all the guests at my door in with that laughter? What if I were to get up and instead of a tight jaw, I put a smile on my face? What if I noticed the way I was feeling and was simply okay with it? What is I was open to whatever Life put in front of me and was amused and entertained by it rather than frustrated? What if I simply stopped resisting what is?  What would my moment, my morning, and my Life be like then?

I want to be a guest house where I can laugh with all my guests and one "I" can be content in.  What about you?

Rumi. The Guest House from https://www.scottishpoetrylibrary.org.uk/poem/guest-house/