Molting

 

Molting

The transformation has started.

Tight and constricting, 

strangling the flow of life in me,

this outer shell I wear is

ready and needing to come off.

It is a slow and  painful process.

Though I may long for outside fingers,

to reach down where I, 

in contorted shape,

lay, writhing and twisting,

to rip the skin  off in one painful swoop

so I can breathe for the first time,

I know there is a process I must follow.

I must allow myself to molt.

Ego’s drying carcass, 

with all its likes and dislikes,

freckling and speckling  

in the beautiful patterns 

of reds and yellows,

  I once wore so proudly

to let others know who I was

will, I am told, 

peel and slide off me

naturally and effortlessly,

leaving a perfect form 

of what I never was behind me…

if I am willing.

I think I am willing.

They tell me  that,

as I continue to make my way through

these tall grasses of life circumstance,

I need do nothing but allow.

I will do my best to allow.

 

Molting….Self is  molting.

It is a slow and painful process,

impacted by my ambivalent readiness.

Part of me longs to be free 

of this  restricting hold.

The other part is much too attached

 to these beautiful colours

 and the way the world seems to 

fear and respect me for them.

I have grown accustomed 

to the defensive safety they provide.

How naked and vulnerable I fear,

 I  will be without my outer shell,

at the mercy of Life and all 

that unfolds in front of me.

Yet, as shiny and attractive as it may be,

I know Ego offers a flimsy protection 

from the predators on the outside

and a tight and choking 

prison for my insides.

I must just let it go.

Breathe, I tell myself, breathe.

Relax, I tell myself , relax.

I stop my writhing and resisting

and I lay back to  notice, simply notice….

 the slow progressive peeling

of what I  thought I once was,

 from the being that I am.

I breathe and I relax,

settling into the transformation

that will save me from myself.

I learn to let go.

© Dale-Lynn, February 2023

Sigh! Listening to the  below talk as I continue to process these teachings and the inspiration for this comes up and out like a hiccough. 

Anyway, just a few more chapters of living untethered. I am getting these teachings.  I am absorbing the learning, and am so very grateful for all of it.  I will eventually move on from it but never completely away.  I will just add more teachings and more teachers as I continue to pursue  my Masters of Life degree. Someday I might even graduate.  Do you think?

All is well.

Michael A. Singer ( February 19, 2023) Shedding the  Ego. https://tou.org/talks/