Serve The Moment With All that You Are

 The highest life you can live is when every single moment that passes before you is better off because it did. 

Michael A. Singer, page 197

Serving the Moment

So in the final chapter, Singer explains how Life is really about serving the moment in front of us, and not worrying about whether or not it will serve us. We can serve it  by simply noticing what is in it without judgement or preference, allowing it and appreciating it.  Or we can "do" something that will raise the energy of it as it passes by which could mean smiling to a stranger, dropping  a kind word on someone who needs it or offering a helping hand. We just need to remember the moment is not there to give us something ( though it does), we are there to give it something...and that something, is who we are. 

When we do something to  raise the energy, like  picking up a piece of litter off the street, as Singer offers as an example, we do not do that to satisfy the "little-me's" puny needs and desires ( that never get met anyway, right?...at least not for long) to be thanked and recognized. We do it in a spontaneous and authentic desire to make the world a better place. How wonderful the world would be if we are all self actualized in that way.

Self Actualized?

Self- actualization is the top of Maslow's pyramid and though he tended to stick to the psychological realm in his definition of that achievement, I see it as a crucial step towards the Self- realization that takes us beyond the psyche.  In  order to achieve self actualization , he often explained, one needs to be absent of the need for the good opinion of others. We don't serve others to get something back when we are self- actualized or self realized...we serve for the sake of serving,  spontaneously, authentically, and for the sheer joy it brings to us and to the world. I want that and that is the step in my life-practice where I am now. And of course, Singer teaches how our willingness  to practice relax ing in the face of less than positive opinion can speed this process along.  

Looking For Unconditional Positive Regard? 

This little job I took on helps so much in that area. There is no self esteem building based on positive recognition, let me tell ya, when one is  standing before 13-18 year olds who have absolutely little regard for your position or you for that matter. It is even questionable if they see or hear me  and others who do what I do lol. It is very, very humbling. I went into this position more than a little arrogant, thinking that I could use my years of experience and education to handle the situation and gain respect like I did in my previous position. Ha! Eye opener! I picture Rodney Dangerfield, spitting out his "No Respect!" Speaking about respect,

If your motive is to let go of yourself and serve the moment in front of you, you are worthy of great respect. 

Michael A. Singer, page 198

It is my motive to let go of "me" and serve...it truly is but "me" is not gone yet. There is still a hint of reactivity in me when I see this "lack of respect" from those I am attempting to serve.  There is still a bit of a sting. There is a triggering of old inadequacy wounds. In the beginning the ego felt the sting a lot more intensely but I am  learning to relax into it.  I am able to look out at the many before me who are dishing out the less than positive regard, and then look inside myself to see how my energy is being affected.  Many times I am shocked to realize that I am  not offended or bothered by it.  In fact, I sometimes find myself saying "Cool! This is good. This is what I need for my growth" and I find myself cooly and calmly just slipping into observer mode...not judging...just gently questioning to myself the "why" of the behaviors I am witnessing.  I don't react.  I respond, I state my expectations. I go around to each and see if those expectations are being met. I observe.  I record.  ...without judgment...and I constantly question.  "What is missing here in the service I am providing?  Why is it being resisted? What can I learn from this? Have I done everything in my power house ?  What can I do differently? Is there something I am doing or not doing that is contributing to the resistance? Am I helping or is it even my job to help or simply offer help? You can lead a horse to water but you cannot make it drink " etc. I keep reminding myself of that and I keep giving it back to them in my round about way by basically saying, "I am here to help in the limited way I can in one day  but it is up to you to accept that help. Please know that I am not judging or blaming but I will record all that I observe. You own your behavior and your choices,  not me." 

Most importantly, I observe myself and ask, "Now that I am clear and nonreactive, is there something I can do to raise the moment as it passes by?" page 198.  Of course, I don't say it exactly like that. 

Anyway, I can see how I would never have been able to do this ten years ago.  So attached was I to the good opinion of others. I see growth in me and that is amazing. I am trying to make the moments that pass before me better.  Whether or not I am is left to be seen but at least I am trying.

It is all good.

All is well in my world. 

Michael A. Singer ( 2022) living untethered.  New Harbinger/ Sounds True