We should always remember that the truth of the Self is the same, but when presented to you through words and forms and modes, it may appear in different ways to suit the individual or the trend of the age...But the truth can never be changed because truth is always the same.
Satchidananda, (The Yoga Sutras of Patanjali, 20ll, page 13)
FOMO?
The Social Media Trend
I have heard my kids use this acronym before. They often use it in the contextual experience of feeling inadequate as a result of comparing themselves to someone on social media. They assume that they are missing out on something the other appears to have.
The other looks happier on the page, like they are having so much more fun, that their life is one big adventure followed by one achievement after another. The other's pages reflect a life of "more" love, more laughter, more travel and more great food than they could ever hope to have.
They then are consumed by a "Fear of Missing Out". Something must be wrong with their life because they don't feel as "happy" and as "enthusiastic" as the other appears to be on that page ...So therefore they conclude they are missing out on the secrets of a good life and must "do" something about it.
The Superficial World
I try to tell them that what they are being shown is just a two dimensional picture and a few scribbled ( often grammatically incorrect) words...not the "reality" of the other person's experience. What they are seeing is a very selectively filtered external world reflection...not what is really going on in that person's life. Besides it is the "inner world" that is so important, not the "outer". You don't see much of that on Facebook.
"When I was Your Age..."
Sometimes they seem to understand that and other times they just look at me like I am a weird old crazy lady that just doesn't "get it"...that doesn't get what the world is like for them. That could be true. I am a weird old crazy lady :) And I don't completely understand their experience...How could I when there is a generation gap between us that is as wide as cyber space. They are the conditioned results of their culture. As I am of mine.
" When I was your age..." usually falls on deaf ears, doesn't it?
I come from a time where phones were attached to walls not thumbs and the Jetsons were the only family who got to see the people they were talking to on screen while they were talking. I even go back to the time of the rotary dial.
I remember how excited I was when our family first got a "touch tone" phone. How amazing and advanced my culture was to be able to push buttons rather than stick a finger in a hole to make a call. (Man I miss those phones, only because it still takes me like half an hour to text someone...I just cannot seem to assimilate into the cell phone culture like a cool mom...lol)
And our parents were worried then about how those advancements in technology would effect us. I remember my parents growling my siblings and I for talking so long on the phone to our friends. There was only one family phone and everyone shared it. Imagine!
"I don't know what is wrong with you children today." My father would say. " When I was your age and I wanted to talk to my friends I had no choice but to go knock on their door. Now all you do is talk on the phone...where is the face to face? My, my...what is the world coming to?"
Sound familiar?
Different World/Different Ways
The point is...just as our world was different than the world our parents grew up in, it is a different world for our kids today. I do believe they are more aware of "stress", "anxiety", "depression" , "Addiction" and the "assault on our planet" than we ever were. So yeah...maybe, as a whole, they are more "fearful" and are using that as label that defines them and gets them treatment more than we ever were. Maybe , to some degree, they are more aware that they are missing out on something and are seeking to find that something. Is that a bad thing?
No...I think it could be the first step to healing the entire world.
The Generation That Heals?
Right now they may be looking out at the externals to fill this gapping hole of loneliness, diminishment, lack, and less than they feel by external means.
Maybe if I get all done up like one of the Kardasians and take the best selfie with this person, out at that place while we are eating that food and put it up here, I will look like I got it all. Then maybe I will feel like I got it all and I am not missing out.
They Are Looking...
Then when that doesn't make them feel better, they may seek something out there again and again and again. They may not be looking in the right direction but at least they are looking. They are realizing that there is something more, that they are missing out on something.
My faith is that eventually, after so much disappointment and FOMO...so much suffering... they will see that that Something is not out there; that what they are missing out on is a connection to the Self within....
And maybe one young adult at a time will begin to turn their gaze away from the poorly reflected world on their screens to the only world that truly matters...the only world that will heal this outer one...and that is the world inside.
Truth is Always The Same
It takes suffering sometimes to see the need for healing. The Buddhists teach that the lotus flower grows in the mud...it is the mud that gives it the nutrients it needs to blossom and transform into something beautiful. Maybe this muddy world the kids are living in now, maybe this idea they have that they are suffering because of a Fear of Missing Out is going to transform their suffering into something that will heal the world.
Wouldn't that be great?
All is well, even without the touch tone phones attached to the wall.
Inspired By:
Plum Village Online (April 2017) The Five Powers; Faith, Diligence, Mindfulness, Concentration, Insight -Br Phap Huru https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a4PGrMjea7A
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