Receiving a Gift

I gave them a gift

I gave her a gift
and she cried out loud with happiness.
She jumped up and into my arms
and hugged me with all her might.
"You are the absolute greatest!", she said,
smiling from ear to ear.
She ran off excitedly to take selfies
she could snap chat to her friends.

I gave him a gift
and he smiled politely.
His voice was neutral,
 but pleasant when he said,
"Thank you.  That was very thoughtful of you."
He got up to hug me with as much squeeze
as he gave me when he said goodbye.
He put the gift gently to the side
and he continued to do what he was doing
as he smiled.

I took the gift away from her.
I pulled it from her reluctant hands
and she fell to her knees, crying out in pain,
"You can't.  It isn't fair.  I love it! I need it!"
I apologized as I put the gift
back in the bag it came in.
She watched with her tiny hands in fists
and her face red with heat,
"This is sooo cruel! You are the absolute worst.
I will never talk to you again!"
She stormed off to take selfies
she could snap chat to her friends.

I proceeded to take the gift from him
but before I could lift it from the table beside him, 
he passed it to me gently.
The smile was still on his face as I apologized.
"That's okay.  I understand", he said.
"Thanks again though, for your thoughtfulness."
He stood up and hugged me
with as much squeeze as he gave me
when he said good bye.
He went back to doing what he was doing
as he continued to smile.  

Dale-Lyn 2019

I wrote this little ditty  a few minutes ago when I was thinking about attachment to thoughts, things and ideas  and about equanimity.

Looking Out there for Happiness

So many of us are unconsciously lost in our "mind stuff", identifying our sense of self with past and future, what we can do and attain, what image of self we can create.  We honestly believe the thoughts that come storming through our heads and we lose ourselves in them.  Such thoughts tell us if we do this or that, get this or that, maintain this or that we will be happy.  We, therefore, look to the outside world for our happiness.  Our emotional health is  therefore dependent on "stuff."  A lot of that stuff is just ideology, story and nothing substantial and sustaining. Yet we perceive it to be so real!

The problem with seeking happiness (the ego's definition of happiness) is that this "stuff" we seek is temporary.  Just as quickly as it comes into our lives, it can be taken away. It may cause great "happiness" when we receive it and great pain when we lose it.  We  go through life fluctuating dramatically and often chaotically from one emotional extreme to another. Why? Because we erroneously assume that our sense of peace and joy and wellness is dependent on something "out there". Even though everything "out there" is constantly fluctuating and changing as well.

You can probably tell from the above description which of the receivers was practicing attachment and discrimination and which one was practicing equanimity.

Equanimity

We know we are practicing equanimity and non attachment by how we respond to external offerings, either they be from another in the form of a gift or from Life in the form of circumstance.  Our response to receiving and losing are pretty much the same when we have reached this state of non attachment.  Why?  Because we are not dependent on these things to make us happy.  In fact, at this stage we are looking for something much deeper than ego's conditional happiness.  We are looking for "joy". 

Joy, I believe, is the deep sense of peaceful neutrality and detachment that reminds us of our "aliveness".  It doesn't come from ego but from Spirit or presence. It comes with an acceptance and appreciation of Life and whatever it offers.  Therefore, it doesn't come and go like "happiness" does.  It just is.

When we can experience joy we have transcended the highs and lows of emotional fluctuation and our pendulum stays pretty much centered. Our life  is no longer a story with such extreme ups and downs that we need to dramatically share.  It is an experience of being alive. It is simple and real.

So if I gave you a "special" gift and then took it away, how would you respond?

All is well.