No Big Deal

Not everything is a big deal...chill!
-unknown

A Personal Example of Letting Go

Have a lot to deal with lately. A little stressed lol.  Feel the tightness of that stress in my core and of course, now in my hip...radiating down my knee and up to my lower back. 

A Little Injury

I pulled a muscle and not during yoga but during a reactive  intent to forcibly remove a 80-90 pound dog from my sleeping space. 

She sleeps right where I put my lower legs and feet, innocently pushing both out of alignment during the night.   I often find myself awakened and pushing up against her weight so I can realign myself...often unsuccessfully. No big deal for one or two nights but after months of this, something happens to those muscles. Some muscles will shorten and some will weaken. 

A bear showed up outside my window the other night and she jumped up onto my other leg to get a better look out the window, consequently pinning it down into an awkward position.  The shock and pain of that led to me lifting my unpinned hip up too quickly to push her off the other leg.  Something popped in my hip and I have been experiencing pain ever since. ...and now I have to really watch myself during yoga. ... at a time when I should be ready to go.

No big deal!

A Delay in Beginning a New Adventure

I can stretch this out with yoga! But I can't teach yoga until it is healed.

Been trying to isolate the muscle or even the muscle group in my mind so I know how to handle it but still can't quite figure it out.  Likely an abductor and internal rotator ...so I am thinking Gluteus Medius or  the TFL.  But then I get pain in the upper groin from time to time so I am thinking Pectineus or Adductor Brevis. The pain in my knee tells me that I really did a number on myself...and now the whole body seems to be out of alignment to compensate for the injury and weak muscles that led to it. Could be an extensor issue...a ham even though it does not feel like a hamstring injury but it would explain the knee. More likely the Sartorius muscle (a hip flexor, abductor and external rotator)  which has its attachment below the medial knee right where it hurts on me. Hmm!  The popping I get tells me it could also be an impingement. 

Anyway...I don't know what to do to relax the muscles that need rest because I don't know which ones they are nor do I know what muscles to work on strengthening because I don't know which ones are weak.  It puts my yoga teaching out of the picture for a while. On a brighter note, it is a wonderful opportunity to learn about the consequences of misalignment , weakened muscles and muscles in general so I can prevent injury in myself again and most importantly in my students.  I learned a lot of wonderful stuff about hips in the last few days that I can take into practice and into my studio.

No big deal!

Renovations that Never Seem to End

 The renovations down stairs, that I have admittedly been unconsciously stressing over, I find out coincidentally will not be ready for another three weeks thus adding to cost and inconvenience and a delay on any return of investment. On a brighter note, it is also giving me time to figure out and to heal from the injury. I am in the process of leaning up against the wall of stress the renovations provide and letting go into it.  What will be will be. It is what it is. It will get done when it gets done.

 In the long run, no big deal!

Financial Woes?

My money stress has been compounded by the fact that a check that was to be deposited 6 weeks ago into my account as part of my retirement allowance, has somehow been lost.  I was hoping to have a return on that by now to help with finances but instead I have been spending weeks encouraging others to look for it.  Worse case scenario it will be stopped and a new one issued...sigh!  I found a great learning opportunity for gentle, patient and centered confrontation in all my dealings with the bank.  Mind you, I am not saying I have not slipped from presence to anger and reaction during any of these confrontations. lol

No big deal!

Parenting Concerns

I have children who are unwell and one I haven't seen in weeks and who I miss so much! I remind myself that this is their life and I must let go. I make it clearly known that I am here for them and I let go.  I lean up against another wall and I fall through into acceptance.

No big deal!

Life or Death; Safety or Danger

I am face to face with major life threatening addiction in another loved one again and somehow I am in a position where I am responsible for his welfare....I honestly have no idea how to handle this! I want to remain open, loving, compassionate, encouraging and nonjudgmental without getting  overly neurotic or protective considering how fatal it could prove to be.  I want to provide a safe environment for recovery while we wait for rehab. Yet I am not even sure how serious he is about his recovery. I find myself in a situation where I feel I am responsible for protecting him from his own choices and at the same time protecting others from his addictive behaviours.  Some of those past addictive behaviours are now mental impressions that wake me up at night and I find myself worrying about what could happen here.

Wow! My core really tightens up when I think of that and that hip ...well those muscles are not relaxing, let me tell ya! lol.

But, I hear from that quiet space within me, that in this moment it is no big deal!  At this moment he is either straight or he is not...that is all that matters.  What he does in the next moment I have no control over. If he is still straight he stays and if he isn't, he doesn't.  If he is serious about recovery he is welcomed with open arms and if he isn't, he won't want to stay because of my limits.  It will be his choice and really nothing to do with me except adhering to my own limits. I want him to stay; I want him to recover. I will do whatever I can within my very limited power to encourage, support and assist in that recovery.  I tell him that but I also tell him that I have little  power here other than the power to set limits, talk, help make plans that protect him and my other loved ones. I remind him that I also have others to protect.

No big deal!

Man...it does help to say those words, to lean into the stress and fall through into the arms of what really matters.  Life matters, Stillness matters.  Peace matters.  Spirit/God/Self Consciousness/ awareness/The way...matters!!  Love matters!

All else is No Big Deal!

All is well in my world!