I deny error; it is simply progress toward truth. I know that it is impossible to fail when faith is present.
Uell S. Andersen, Third Meditation in Three Magic Words
Not as easy as it looks to get two days, let alone 21 days, of complaint free living in. I did get 24 hours in though...yeah!! I then had to switch my bracelet twice.
Please know that what comes from my mouth is only like 10 % of what I got going on in my mind. I am far from evolved away from any negative thinking. I have just learned to control, to some extent, what I allow to come "out" of me. The outspoken complaint, which is so much easier to monitor than all those negative thoughts, allows me to see what I got swirling around in my head.
Bowen describes that which distinguishes a complaint from a non complaining statement in A Complaint Free world, as the meaning and the energy behind them.It isn't that the things I say are all that "complainy" in the context of what most of us would call a complaint but the energy behind what I say outwardly is quite negative. Once the words are spoken out loud to myself or others...I can retrace them back to the negativity that begot them. That is what is so cool about this experiment.
For example today, when I was attempting to tie the dogs outside, I could not find the tie-outs and heard myself saying to a person who wasn't even there, "You better not have taken them to tie up things on your truck!" This may seem like no more than a simple wish. The energy behind it, however, was one of resentment and resistance indeed making it a complaint.
Resentment
Instantly the little circumstance led me to recall all the "other" times this individual , in a state of unawareness or what some might call "thoughtlessness or unconsciousness" did not take into consideration the value "things" may have for other people. These past behaviours were totally non malicious in anyway but leading to a certain amount of unintended suffering ( however minor) for someone else. Having the tie outs means that I can not tie up the dogs outside all day which proves to be inconvenient for me and the dogs.
Now I am not even sure he has them. I am creating my little complaint/reaction on an assumption based on memory of past behaviours. The big learning here gained from examining this complaint is that I am still clinging to past resentments in my resentment bank, of what my ego likes to label as "inconsiderate and disrespectful" behaviours of others. So as soon as I see a situation that differs from what I thought I wanted, this resentment is triggered. The complaint has moved that resentment from the thought realm to the realm of external awareness.
Resistance to What Is
Another thing that differentiates complaint from a statement of fact is a certain energy of resistance to what is. "He better not"...is equivalent to an "Oh No!" , a "This shouldn't be", or a "This is not fair or right!".
When we complain we are resisting what the moment has for us. When we resist what the moment has for us , we resist the moment. And when we resist the moment, guess what? We resist Life. This complaint showed me that I was resisting Life! I don't want to do that even for a second.
So this small little wish definitely deserved a wrist switching. And what a wonderful opportunity to present to me my own resentment and resistance. Once I am aware of it I can work on letting go of it. Right?
The non-complaint and drama free statement I could have responded with, one that Life, the almighty teacher, would give me a gold star for, could have been: "Hmmm! I don't know where the tie outs are. Maybe D. has them because he has taken similar things before without thinking but maybe he doesn't. The fact remains that I have no tie outs. There is no "better not" or "shouldn't be" about this. It just is."
Hmmm!
So I am switching wrists and beginning all over again, and again and again. What seems like error on our part when we have to switch wrists is actually just progress toward truth! How cool is that?
All is well in my world!
Bowen, Will. A Complaint Free World: How to Stop Complaining and Start Enjoying the Life You Always Wanted . Potter/TenSpeed/Harmony. Kindle Edition.
Wednesday, June 24, 2020
Tuesday, June 23, 2020
Learning from Complaining
There are only two things you can do for yourself. One is conception, and the other is conviction. All the work of creation rests with another than you. For no man is responsible for anything in this life except his thought and his belief.
Andersen, Uell S..
The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines “complain” as “to express grief, pain, or discontent.”...By its very definition, a complaint is spoken.
Bowen, Will.
Switching Wrists
Well I am now wearing the elastic I had placed on my left wrist yesterday, on my right. :) All good. I love this exercise because it gets me examining my internal and external behaviours. I was actually quite surprised to discover that I do pretty good in the "outward complaining" department. I caught myself three times and though others said "no" when I sought to validate my complaining by asking "Was that a complaint?"; and though they may not obviously express grief, pain or discontent ...I recorded these three things as complaints because of the negativity factor. Three complaints in 24 hours is pretty good, don't you think? And yes I am recording my complaints so I can better understand them and restructure those mental formations in my mind that are less than positive.
First Two Complaints Based On Assumption and Bias
The first two came during a certain intense frustration last evening looking for an individual who was scheduled to go into rehab today after a year long wait to get in. He went on a seven day pre-rehab binge and we couldn't find him anywhere. This individual will literally die if he does not recover. And though that sounds like a negative statement and a complaint in itself, I can assure you it is a simple fact.
So while we were looking all over the area for him, I could feel familiar frustration, fear and worry...anger and resentment brewing to the surface but I was very "cool" about the whole thing. That is until my suspicious, past conditioned and assuming mind stepped up to question the behaviour of one of his friends who went out of his way to help us find him. I questioned out loud , "I wonder what his real motivation for helping us was? Was there something in that apartment he didn't want us to see?" I "assumed" he too was an addict, and as an "addict" he would want all addicts to stay addicts and his motive for getting into the car with us had to be for some other reason then helping us get his friend into recovery. The words that came out of my mouth, helped me to see what kinds of seeds were growing from my store consciousness.
Shortly after that, as we were reviewing the days events to determine the possible where abouts of this individual we were looking for, D. mentioned a few things this individual had said to him. I found myself calmly shaking my head saying, "You know we cannot believe a word he says when he is using like this."
Man...how negative is that...to dismiss the core goodness of human beings to their exterior conditions? To stigmatize and stereotype a group of individuals, who are inflicted in this way, as selfish and uncaring and always lying. Yes desperation for a certain survival leads some individuals who are severely addicted to do some dishonest and less than ethical things....but to "absolute" everything is unfair.
Recognizing that I did that ( whether there was an ulterior motive for helping or not; whether he lied or not) really knocked some sense into me about a conditioned belief/ seed/ prompter within my mind. I do not want to water that seed any more. I am not going to beat myself up for it, either. I am just going to observe it, and learn from it. Hopefully, I will be more compassionate and grateful as I look at individuals who suffer from such life threatening and desperation inducing conditions with less prejudice and assumption in the future.
The third complaint came this morning when I, because of a hot humid environment, and extra hot flashes as well as post crisis anxiety...slept less than well, (what I just wrote was a complaint, wasn't it?) received a call at 7a m ( after I just fell asleep again) from my daughter who was looking for money for gas. Now there is a lot of extras around this request that I will not get into but I will just say...that in my blurry eyed and grumpy state I was not nice. I said nothing except, "Ohhhh A." followed by a big pathetic sigh. And I believe I hung up without saying the usual "goodbye and, love you".
Needless to say my elastic has a new home and I begin again lol.
It is all good. It may take me a while to get my 21 days of complaint free living in, to break the habit of complaining once and for all, but I am determined to. In the process , I get to learn so much more about my mind. How cool is that?
All is well.
Andersen, Uell S.. Three Magic Words . BN Publishing. Kindle Edition.
Bowen, Will. A Complaint Free World: How to Stop Complaining and Start Enjoying the Life You Always Wanted (p. 28). Potter/TenSpeed/Harmony. Kindle Edition.
Andersen, Uell S..
The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines “complain” as “to express grief, pain, or discontent.”...By its very definition, a complaint is spoken.
Bowen, Will.
Switching Wrists
Well I am now wearing the elastic I had placed on my left wrist yesterday, on my right. :) All good. I love this exercise because it gets me examining my internal and external behaviours. I was actually quite surprised to discover that I do pretty good in the "outward complaining" department. I caught myself three times and though others said "no" when I sought to validate my complaining by asking "Was that a complaint?"; and though they may not obviously express grief, pain or discontent ...I recorded these three things as complaints because of the negativity factor. Three complaints in 24 hours is pretty good, don't you think? And yes I am recording my complaints so I can better understand them and restructure those mental formations in my mind that are less than positive.
First Two Complaints Based On Assumption and Bias
The first two came during a certain intense frustration last evening looking for an individual who was scheduled to go into rehab today after a year long wait to get in. He went on a seven day pre-rehab binge and we couldn't find him anywhere. This individual will literally die if he does not recover. And though that sounds like a negative statement and a complaint in itself, I can assure you it is a simple fact.
So while we were looking all over the area for him, I could feel familiar frustration, fear and worry...anger and resentment brewing to the surface but I was very "cool" about the whole thing. That is until my suspicious, past conditioned and assuming mind stepped up to question the behaviour of one of his friends who went out of his way to help us find him. I questioned out loud , "I wonder what his real motivation for helping us was? Was there something in that apartment he didn't want us to see?" I "assumed" he too was an addict, and as an "addict" he would want all addicts to stay addicts and his motive for getting into the car with us had to be for some other reason then helping us get his friend into recovery. The words that came out of my mouth, helped me to see what kinds of seeds were growing from my store consciousness.
Shortly after that, as we were reviewing the days events to determine the possible where abouts of this individual we were looking for, D. mentioned a few things this individual had said to him. I found myself calmly shaking my head saying, "You know we cannot believe a word he says when he is using like this."
Man...how negative is that...to dismiss the core goodness of human beings to their exterior conditions? To stigmatize and stereotype a group of individuals, who are inflicted in this way, as selfish and uncaring and always lying. Yes desperation for a certain survival leads some individuals who are severely addicted to do some dishonest and less than ethical things....but to "absolute" everything is unfair.
Recognizing that I did that ( whether there was an ulterior motive for helping or not; whether he lied or not) really knocked some sense into me about a conditioned belief/ seed/ prompter within my mind. I do not want to water that seed any more. I am not going to beat myself up for it, either. I am just going to observe it, and learn from it. Hopefully, I will be more compassionate and grateful as I look at individuals who suffer from such life threatening and desperation inducing conditions with less prejudice and assumption in the future.
The third complaint came this morning when I, because of a hot humid environment, and extra hot flashes as well as post crisis anxiety...slept less than well, (what I just wrote was a complaint, wasn't it?) received a call at 7a m ( after I just fell asleep again) from my daughter who was looking for money for gas. Now there is a lot of extras around this request that I will not get into but I will just say...that in my blurry eyed and grumpy state I was not nice. I said nothing except, "Ohhhh A." followed by a big pathetic sigh. And I believe I hung up without saying the usual "goodbye and, love you".
Needless to say my elastic has a new home and I begin again lol.
It is all good. It may take me a while to get my 21 days of complaint free living in, to break the habit of complaining once and for all, but I am determined to. In the process , I get to learn so much more about my mind. How cool is that?
All is well.
Andersen, Uell S.. Three Magic Words . BN Publishing. Kindle Edition.
Bowen, Will. A Complaint Free World: How to Stop Complaining and Start Enjoying the Life You Always Wanted (p. 28). Potter/TenSpeed/Harmony. Kindle Edition.
Monday, June 22, 2020
To Live Positively: Stop Complaining
Conceptual habits of the Conscious Mind are the greatest bar to man's discovery of himself.
Andersen, Uell S..
When you stop complaining about what you perceive to be wrong and begin to speak about what you are grateful for and what you desire, you force your manufacturer brain to develop a new product line.
Bowen, Will. (p. 29).
I know, like this pear tree branch, I have the capacity to reach higher. We all do!
I am going to begin my challenge. I am going to use the teachings from Andersen's book and especially the meditations to help build faith and purpose as I attempt to become more positive in my thinking.
I am also going to use the simplified suggestions in A Complaint Free World by Will Bowen to make it a more measurable experiment. I presently have an elastic bracelet on my wrist and am going to focus on getting 21 consecutive days of outwardly spoken complaint-free habit (much easier to control and measure than thought) into my life.
And, of course, I will still adhere to the teachings of my "go-to" mentors ( who do not know they are my mentors) namely, Eckhart Tolle, Thich Nhat Hanh and Michael Singer.
Hmmm!
I will keep you posted.
All is well in my world!
Andersen, Uell S.. Three Magic Words . BN Publishing. Kindle Edition.
Bowen, Will. A Complaint Free World: How to Stop Complaining and Start Enjoying the Life You Always Wanted (p. 29). Potter/TenSpeed/Harmony. Kindle Edition.
Andersen, Uell S..
When you stop complaining about what you perceive to be wrong and begin to speak about what you are grateful for and what you desire, you force your manufacturer brain to develop a new product line.
Bowen, Will. (p. 29).
I am going to begin my challenge. I am going to use the teachings from Andersen's book and especially the meditations to help build faith and purpose as I attempt to become more positive in my thinking.
I am also going to use the simplified suggestions in A Complaint Free World by Will Bowen to make it a more measurable experiment. I presently have an elastic bracelet on my wrist and am going to focus on getting 21 consecutive days of outwardly spoken complaint-free habit (much easier to control and measure than thought) into my life.
And, of course, I will still adhere to the teachings of my "go-to" mentors ( who do not know they are my mentors) namely, Eckhart Tolle, Thich Nhat Hanh and Michael Singer.
Hmmm!
I will keep you posted.
All is well in my world!
Andersen, Uell S.. Three Magic Words . BN Publishing. Kindle Edition.
Bowen, Will. A Complaint Free World: How to Stop Complaining and Start Enjoying the Life You Always Wanted (p. 29). Potter/TenSpeed/Harmony. Kindle Edition.
Sunday, June 21, 2020
Just a Little Ripple?
Just a Little Ripple?
Just a little ripple...
emerging
into existence
from the vastness of ocean.
Floating under a spacious sky
that is forever changing.
Seemingly vulnerable,
blown in this direction
and that,
at the mercy
of wind and rain
and the ocean's own
fierce and unforgiving nature.
Seemingly alone,
struggling and competing
as a separate entity,
amongst a surface of
many "other" competing ripples.
The little ripple bobs up and down
determined to get
to some unseen shore
up ahead in the distance.
Struggling,
fighting,
resisting,
all that pours and blows upon it,
pushing back
all the other ripples to do so,
the little ripple
may someday succeed.
It may become
Just a little ripple...
emerging
into existence
from the vastness of ocean.
Floating under a spacious sky
that is forever changing.
Seemingly vulnerable,
blown in this direction
and that,
at the mercy
of wind and rain
and the ocean's own
fierce and unforgiving nature.
Seemingly alone,
struggling and competing
as a separate entity,
amongst a surface of
many "other" competing ripples.
The little ripple bobs up and down
determined to get
to some unseen shore
up ahead in the distance.
Struggling,
fighting,
resisting,
all that pours and blows upon it,
pushing back
all the other ripples to do so,
the little ripple
may someday succeed.
It may become
a spray of salty foam
upon the shore
it thought would save it,
only to discover
that no salvation can be found
amongst the rock and sand.
It will see,
upon the shore
it thought would save it,
only to discover
that no salvation can be found
amongst the rock and sand.
It will see,
in its exhausted state,
that it is water
that it is water
belonging in water
and with that realization
will gently be pulled back
into the depth
that is and always will be "home".
Once the little ripple sees itself
and all the ripples
that surround it,
as the ocean...
all struggling will cease.
Peace will finally
be experienced by all
when the mighty,
patient ocean sees
It's perfect powerful Self
reflected beautifully
in each tiny little ripple.
and with that realization
will gently be pulled back
into the depth
that is and always will be "home".
Once the little ripple sees itself
and all the ripples
that surround it,
as the ocean...
all struggling will cease.
Peace will finally
be experienced by all
when the mighty,
patient ocean sees
It's perfect powerful Self
reflected beautifully
in each tiny little ripple.
© Dale-Lyn (Pen) , June 2020
I don't know lol! This came out, and not all that easily or gracefully , after listening to the below video. Hmm! Not going to judge. I will put it down and possibly come back to it. I don't know lol
All is well!
Eckhart Tolle (June, 2020) Eckhart Tolle Special Live Teaching/ Conscious Manifestation. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8G46F9ye204
Eckhart Tolle (June, 2020) Eckhart Tolle Special Live Teaching/ Conscious Manifestation. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8G46F9ye204
Saturday, June 20, 2020
Lesson 190-200
It is your thoughts alone that cause you pain. Nothing external to your mind can hurt or injure you in anyway.
ACIM-W-190: 5: 1-2
To alter your life the only single course open is to alter your thinking!
Andersen, Uell S..
Hmmm! This is what I have been contemplating as I finish reading Andersen's book. I see how ACIM supports a lot of his teachings. It seems fitting to write of my understanding of the next ten lessons. (I have been neglecting to finish this mission, so wrapped up was I in other things. My bad! :))
Lesson 190
This lesson speaks to the fact that it is thought and thought alone that causes pain...namely an incorrect perception It goes on to make a very strong statement that if we believe pain is a real thing...namely some random external thing that has the power to hurt us, than we cannot truly believe in God. If God is real, there is no pain. If pain is real, there is no God. (I have to think about that statement before I comment further.) The lesson goes on to say that the world seems to be causing us pain, but the world is cause less. It is we that create the world with our unskillful thinking, so it is we that create pain with our thinking. Pain is illusion; joy reality. Pain is but sleep; joy is awakening. Peace is deception; joy alone is truth. (Peace is deception? Have to think about that one too but I am assuming right off that A Course is referring to ego's "idea" of peace, not peace itself)When we realize who we truly are and from Whom we came...we will realize this and no longer suffer pain.
This coincides beautifully with what I read from Andersen today:
Once we have come far enough to realize that all pain-physical, mental, and emotional-proceeds from errors in thinking, we are well on the way to filling our lives with vigor, abundance and joy...
Chapter 11
Lesson 191
This lesson speaks to how we have denied our identities as "the holy son of God Himself." It teaches that if we could only believe, what I am already guessing the three magic words from Andersen's book, are alluding to...We would be free from all our illusions of this world that we created with our minds. We would be free of suffering by realizing our Oneness with everything.
Lesson 192
In this lesson we are reminded that our function, while here in physical form, is forgiveness. Until we completely evolve as a race...we will need forgiveness as a means of letting go of all our illusions. We are to forgive others as well as our selves for our errors in thinking and judgment which result in our actions. Only thinking can relieve the mind of thinking that the body is its home.
Lesson 193
Lesson 193 offers us lessons God would have us learn in order to correct our erroneous perceptions. The major point behind the lessons is Forgive, and you will see this differently. When we perceive ourselves to be suffering because of circumstance or others we are in bondage. All we need to do to free ourselves is to remember these words and learn to believe them. Forgive ! Forgive! Forgive!
Lesson 194
Here we are asked to let the future go and place it in God's Hands. Instead of worrying anxiously over what tomorrow may or may not bring, we are encouraged to simply Let go and Let God! The world and our brother will stop appearing, then, to be the enemy. We will be free.
Lesson 195
In this lesson we are taught to be sincerely grateful through Love. Knowing that our freedom from bondage will bring everyone to freedom we walk the road to god in Love.
Lesson 196
Despite the lies ego tells us, we need to know that when we hurt another, we hurt ourselves. We do not fear others, we fear ourselves and when we realize this we can step back away from fear and into Love. Love allows us to see how w are all One.
Lesson 197
Keeping on the thought stream that we are really all One, this lesson teaches that when we are grateful it is us that earn the gratitude. When we accept the gifts we have been given gratefully they are accepted by all.
Lesson 198
Forgive, don't condemn!
When we condemn another, we end up injuring ourselves by accepting this illusionary possibility. Since there is no form of suffering that can hide an unforgiving thought; there is no form of pain that forgiveness cannot heal. All we have to do is forgive.
Lesson 199
When we realize we are not bodies, the mind is set free. We are not trapped within the body, we are spirit that uses mind. Ego may tell us we are trapped in physical form to create fear but when our mind's are free to serve God and the Holy spirit, there can be no more attack thoughts or no more fear.
Love will flow in such a free mind.
Lesson 200
We will find happiness and peace nowhere but with God. We just need to realize that this world is not where we belong and what it offers will not bring us eternal peace. We need to forgive ourselves for our illusions and delusions and Go home.
I think of Thich Nhat Hanh's Gatha for walking meditation as I review these lessons:
I am not a body. I am free. For I am still as God created me.
All is well!
ACIM ( 2007) A Course in Miracles Combined Volume. Workbook. Foundation For Inner Peace.
Andersen, Uell S.. Three Magic Words . BN Publishing. Kindle Edition.
Thich Nhat Hanh (2011) peace is every breath. Harper One.
ACIM-W-190: 5: 1-2
To alter your life the only single course open is to alter your thinking!
Andersen, Uell S..
Hmmm! This is what I have been contemplating as I finish reading Andersen's book. I see how ACIM supports a lot of his teachings. It seems fitting to write of my understanding of the next ten lessons. (I have been neglecting to finish this mission, so wrapped up was I in other things. My bad! :))
Lesson 190
This lesson speaks to the fact that it is thought and thought alone that causes pain...namely an incorrect perception It goes on to make a very strong statement that if we believe pain is a real thing...namely some random external thing that has the power to hurt us, than we cannot truly believe in God. If God is real, there is no pain. If pain is real, there is no God. (I have to think about that statement before I comment further.) The lesson goes on to say that the world seems to be causing us pain, but the world is cause less. It is we that create the world with our unskillful thinking, so it is we that create pain with our thinking. Pain is illusion; joy reality. Pain is but sleep; joy is awakening. Peace is deception; joy alone is truth. (Peace is deception? Have to think about that one too but I am assuming right off that A Course is referring to ego's "idea" of peace, not peace itself)When we realize who we truly are and from Whom we came...we will realize this and no longer suffer pain.
This coincides beautifully with what I read from Andersen today:
Once we have come far enough to realize that all pain-physical, mental, and emotional-proceeds from errors in thinking, we are well on the way to filling our lives with vigor, abundance and joy...
Chapter 11
Lesson 191
This lesson speaks to how we have denied our identities as "the holy son of God Himself." It teaches that if we could only believe, what I am already guessing the three magic words from Andersen's book, are alluding to...We would be free from all our illusions of this world that we created with our minds. We would be free of suffering by realizing our Oneness with everything.
Lesson 192
In this lesson we are reminded that our function, while here in physical form, is forgiveness. Until we completely evolve as a race...we will need forgiveness as a means of letting go of all our illusions. We are to forgive others as well as our selves for our errors in thinking and judgment which result in our actions. Only thinking can relieve the mind of thinking that the body is its home.
Lesson 193
Lesson 193 offers us lessons God would have us learn in order to correct our erroneous perceptions. The major point behind the lessons is Forgive, and you will see this differently. When we perceive ourselves to be suffering because of circumstance or others we are in bondage. All we need to do to free ourselves is to remember these words and learn to believe them. Forgive ! Forgive! Forgive!
Lesson 194
Here we are asked to let the future go and place it in God's Hands. Instead of worrying anxiously over what tomorrow may or may not bring, we are encouraged to simply Let go and Let God! The world and our brother will stop appearing, then, to be the enemy. We will be free.
Lesson 195
In this lesson we are taught to be sincerely grateful through Love. Knowing that our freedom from bondage will bring everyone to freedom we walk the road to god in Love.
Lesson 196
Despite the lies ego tells us, we need to know that when we hurt another, we hurt ourselves. We do not fear others, we fear ourselves and when we realize this we can step back away from fear and into Love. Love allows us to see how w are all One.
Lesson 197
Keeping on the thought stream that we are really all One, this lesson teaches that when we are grateful it is us that earn the gratitude. When we accept the gifts we have been given gratefully they are accepted by all.
Lesson 198
Forgive, don't condemn!
When we condemn another, we end up injuring ourselves by accepting this illusionary possibility. Since there is no form of suffering that can hide an unforgiving thought; there is no form of pain that forgiveness cannot heal. All we have to do is forgive.
Lesson 199
When we realize we are not bodies, the mind is set free. We are not trapped within the body, we are spirit that uses mind. Ego may tell us we are trapped in physical form to create fear but when our mind's are free to serve God and the Holy spirit, there can be no more attack thoughts or no more fear.
Love will flow in such a free mind.
Lesson 200
We will find happiness and peace nowhere but with God. We just need to realize that this world is not where we belong and what it offers will not bring us eternal peace. We need to forgive ourselves for our illusions and delusions and Go home.
I think of Thich Nhat Hanh's Gatha for walking meditation as I review these lessons:
I have arrived; I am home
In the here; in the now.
I am solid; I am free.
In the ultimate I dwell.
(peace is every breath, page 30)
The Review
In the review for the last 20 lessons, ACIM encourages us to begin our cognitive restructuring for the purposes of finding "home" and dwelling in the "Ultimate". It asks that we use this statement when we find ourselves dwelling on thoughts that are directed by ego, dragging us back into fear, anger, despair and hopelessness.
This thought I do not want. I choose instead___________________
We can fill in that blank with:
I am not a body. I am free. For I am still as God created me.
All is well!
ACIM ( 2007) A Course in Miracles Combined Volume. Workbook. Foundation For Inner Peace.
Andersen, Uell S.. Three Magic Words . BN Publishing. Kindle Edition.
Thich Nhat Hanh (2011) peace is every breath. Harper One.
The Only Cure for A Different Kind of Poverty
The greatest disease in the west today in not TB or leprosy; it is being unwanted, unloved, and uncared for. We can cure physical diseases with medicine, but the only cure for loneliness, despair, and hopelessness is love. There are many in the world who are dying for a piece of bread but there are many more dying for a little love. The poverty in the West is a different type of poverty-it is not only a poverty of loneliness but also of spirituality.
-Mother Teresa
Yesterday's post wasn't just about my daughter's friend, or about little me as the "I" though I certainly visualized him as the poem was being written and sincerely wished that I or someone could have been there . ( Notice how I say..."the poem was being written", rather than, "when I was writing the poem."? I am seeing more and more myself as only a tool, a conduit for what Andersen refers to as "universal mind" to pour through. All I can "do" is come to the page or the person suffering and stay open.)
The poem was written, I believe, as a way of expressing the importance of human connection, of being there for others so they know they are not alone. We are all responsible for suffering in this world...and we all carry the capacity to transform it with us. Compassion not only can help others feel understood, it can open the listener up too, open the hearts of all beings up to the greatest and most powerful force in this world- Love. We owe that compassion to every single being on this planet, including ourselves. Hmmm!
I owe a lot of that inspiration that sat me down and opened me enough so the poem could come through to Thich Nhat Hanh and his teachings on "Listening deeply".
I am not asking people to feel guilty and ashamed of how we have and do handle suffering. I am just asking that we look deeply into how we handle suffering. Determine what was unhealthy and non beneficial in the past in getting us to where we really want to be...a state of openness to Love, joy and all the things, I believe, God wants for us.
Has denying and turning our backs on suffering worked for us so far? Maybe for all of a minute but no...we can not run away from the inevitabilities in life. Instead of putting all our energy into running away from suffering, pushing away suffering, struggling against suffering, denying and stuffing suffering...we need to recognize it, accept it and embrace it. Then we can look deeply into it so we can transform it. I truly believe this is the way to go...for each and every one of us.
Hmm...But then again, what do I know for sure? Absolutely nothing. :)
All is well.
Friday, June 19, 2020
I Wish
Oops! Tried to edit and revise this...maybe it wasn't meant to be...cuz I kind of made a mess lol
I Wish
a better way out.
with you that afternoon,
holding your pain and your being
long enough for you to catch your breath
and hear what was being said
how sweet and musical that breath you were thinking of ending was,
how lovely and welcoming this world you were thinking of leaving was,
and until the suffocating heaviness diminished,
just enough
I Wish
I wish I could have sat with you that afternoon,
pulled a chair up close enough to you,
leaned my open being towards you
as the pain resurfaced
and the knots of hope that kept you going
unravelled.
I wish I could have been there.
I wish I would have been able to place,
even an awkward hand
on your knee as it bounced up and down
while the persistent and compelling thought
vibrated through you,
so you could feel the connection
of form against form
and know that your body’s borders
and your broken heart could never
truly separate you from others.
I wish I could have showed you
that you were not alone.
I wish I could have showed up
at the right time,
with my judgements, my ideas,
my need to hide
behind layers of useless advice
and delusions of wisdom
tucked away somewhere,
so I could be for you,
someone who simply listened.
I wish I could have offered
my listening presence.
I wish I could have
made you feel safe enough
to release the
gnawing pain you were stuffing
so deeply and ferociously inside
at the right time,
with my judgements, my ideas,
my need to hide
behind layers of useless advice
and delusions of wisdom
tucked away somewhere,
so I could be for you,
someone who simply listened.
I wish I could have offered
my listening presence.
I wish I could have
made you feel safe enough
to release the
gnawing pain you were stuffing
so deeply and ferociously inside
like some brave but broken Sergeant
on the battle field,
on the battle field,
trying to keep your charges and
yourself
from knowing just how afraid you really were.
I wish I could have let you know you
did not have to sacrifice yourself for peace.
I wish that I could have sat with you
in the perfection of warm and spacious silence
allowing it to wrap itself around us and go through us,
so you could purge yourself
of the suffering that was eating at every cell of your being,
as it tricked you into believing
as it tricked you into believing
there was no escaping from it.
I wish I could have offered you,
a better way out.
I wish I could have nodded my head
in front of you while you spoke
so you would know that I was earnestly ,
with my eyes and my ears,
and my heart and my soul,
and my heart and my soul,
there to pick up the pieces of you that spilled out
all around us in the verbal flood of confusion,
give them back to you and
watch as you put them back into
their respective places.
I wish I could have showed you that someone cared.
I wish I could have rocked back and forth with you that afternoon,
holding your pain and your being
in my heart,
as if it were my only child,
long enough for you to catch your breath
and hear what was being said
through my own flawed and wordless articulation.
I wish I could have made you hear
what the silence had to say.
what the silence had to say.
I wish I could have made you see,
without opening my mouth to offer
verbal trinkets and long winded explanations
about the preciousness of Life,
without opening my mouth to offer
verbal trinkets and long winded explanations
about the preciousness of Life,
how sweet and musical that breath you were thinking of ending was,
how beautiful and magical that heart beat you were thinking of stopping was,
how lovely and welcoming this world you were thinking of leaving was,
how forgiving and transformative that suffering you were determined to end was,
and how perfect and divine this
being you couldn't see within you was.
I wish I could have made you see
how amazing your Life could be.
I wish, I was there in that
moment
when that other thought became so loud
and so demanding,
it was all you could hear,
all you could feel,
all you could see.
I wish I was there to remove
your trembling hand
from the object you
clung so ambivalently to,
to hold it in my own
from the object you
clung so ambivalently to,
to hold it in my own
until the thought stepped back,
until the darkness opened up a crack
to allow a soft ray of light through
until the darkness opened up a crack
to allow a soft ray of light through
and until the suffocating heaviness diminished,
just enough
to make you
willing to breathe another breath,
and live another day.
I wish that I was there then
so you could be here now.
© Dale-Lyn (pen), June 2020
Prioritizing Mental Health/Mind Healing
Yes it is important to inspire the next generation, but let's not forget to inspire the now generation too.
Onyi Anyado
An Evolutionary Process?
My daughter is so wise. Her suffering, somehow, makes her wiser. She said to me, when I asked why so many within her age group were suffering, "Its just evolution Mom. Change is painful and the world has gotta change." How's that for an answer.
The generation we gave birth to is a wise one!
These kids are waking up. They are waking up from generations of conditioning that has been drilled into their heads and absorbed by their cells. They are now at a crossroads of unlearning that which they were taught. It is a scary and confusing place to be. They got to this point, I suppose, by watching us.
What They Learned By Watching Us
They watched us, the generation that physically birthed them, doing what we were taught to do from the generations that birthed us. They watched us do many great and wonderful things. They also, unfortunately, watched us worship the almighty dollar, define and strive for an idea of "success and happiness" which meant conquering the external world and anyone or anything that got in our way.
They watched us place "a good work ethic" at the top of the favorable characteristics to have list as we rewarded them for having one, punished them for not. They watched us work our 12 hour workdays for the pursuit of a "better tomorrow."
They watched us put off this elusive happiness for something that might happen in the future, while we stomped blindly and destructively over each precious moment we had to get there.
They watched us, as we accepted and taught, that it was normal to be anxious, depressed, unhappy, exhausted, worried, fearful and stressed to the core. That we should just "suck it up" and grin and bear it...the more we could "endure" of this, the better and stronger we would be in the long run.
They watched us laugh and sweep away any idea that there may be more than what can be seen and felt with the five senses. They watched us use science and a "rational" mind to create faithlessness, in anything but materialism and random uncertainty as we lived with "skeptical doubt" in the goodness of Life.
They watched us prioritizing safety over exploration and expansion . We wonder why they seek the comfort zone so often and we know in our deepest core that is because we have so beautifully built comfort zones around them.
They watched us chanting our silly mantras, "Keep moving!" "The busier the better." ""Just do it" as we ran around like chickens with our heads cut off, going nowhere in particular. They watched us prioritise productivity over well being as we denied, dismissed, pushed away, drank or ate away, or numbed from any emotions that were painful, encouraging them to do the same.
They watched us destroy this planet to appease our materialistic needs and they see so clearly the damage we have done.
And they see that through all of this "effort" ...how "unhappy" most of us still are despite all our hard work , despite how much we may own or be able to buy for them. They see that the people they turn to for mentorship and guidance still do not know how to live or to just be. They see that the way we are doing things now is not going to work much longer. They see that the human race, as well s the planet, is in trouble.
The Burden of Change
No wonder why there seems to be such a collective sense of hopelessness and fear amongst the 20 something population. The deep resounding vibration of, "The world has gotta change," has been dumped on their shoulders to carry. And as we continue to do what we have been doing, they can no longer follow; they can no longer trust that ego force that keeps us moving in this direction. They see that our ways are not only unhealthy but also destructive. Yet, most of us have our heads stuck so far into habitual patterns, we do not see it...therefore we are not only unable to help relieve the loads they carry but we add to them.
We all have to Wake Up!
If we want to help our youth. We all have to wake up . We have to take a good look at how we are living, how we are pursuing this idea of happiness, how we are denying what is. We have to examine our mental formations, have a good look at the mind and choose to learn to use it skillfully rather than just being pulled along by a collective mind, as we are now. We have to recognize, accept and transform our own suffering so we can help them transform theirs. We have to prioritize instead of stigmatize the need for better mental health for all of us.
Life is an inside game. Mind healing has to be a priority. Our problems begin in the mind and can only be solved in the mind. We need to learn and teach that. Let's teach our kids how to find peace, joy, Love through their recognizing, allowing, embracing and looking deeply into suffering.
Let's discover that for ourselves first. If we cannot wake up, how are we going to help them wake up? We need to wake up for them!
All is well.
Onyi Anyado
An Evolutionary Process?
My daughter is so wise. Her suffering, somehow, makes her wiser. She said to me, when I asked why so many within her age group were suffering, "Its just evolution Mom. Change is painful and the world has gotta change." How's that for an answer.
The generation we gave birth to is a wise one!
These kids are waking up. They are waking up from generations of conditioning that has been drilled into their heads and absorbed by their cells. They are now at a crossroads of unlearning that which they were taught. It is a scary and confusing place to be. They got to this point, I suppose, by watching us.
What They Learned By Watching Us
They watched us, the generation that physically birthed them, doing what we were taught to do from the generations that birthed us. They watched us do many great and wonderful things. They also, unfortunately, watched us worship the almighty dollar, define and strive for an idea of "success and happiness" which meant conquering the external world and anyone or anything that got in our way.
They watched us place "a good work ethic" at the top of the favorable characteristics to have list as we rewarded them for having one, punished them for not. They watched us work our 12 hour workdays for the pursuit of a "better tomorrow."
They watched us put off this elusive happiness for something that might happen in the future, while we stomped blindly and destructively over each precious moment we had to get there.
They watched us, as we accepted and taught, that it was normal to be anxious, depressed, unhappy, exhausted, worried, fearful and stressed to the core. That we should just "suck it up" and grin and bear it...the more we could "endure" of this, the better and stronger we would be in the long run.
They watched us laugh and sweep away any idea that there may be more than what can be seen and felt with the five senses. They watched us use science and a "rational" mind to create faithlessness, in anything but materialism and random uncertainty as we lived with "skeptical doubt" in the goodness of Life.
They watched us prioritizing safety over exploration and expansion . We wonder why they seek the comfort zone so often and we know in our deepest core that is because we have so beautifully built comfort zones around them.
They watched us chanting our silly mantras, "Keep moving!" "The busier the better." ""Just do it" as we ran around like chickens with our heads cut off, going nowhere in particular. They watched us prioritise productivity over well being as we denied, dismissed, pushed away, drank or ate away, or numbed from any emotions that were painful, encouraging them to do the same.
They watched us destroy this planet to appease our materialistic needs and they see so clearly the damage we have done.
And they see that through all of this "effort" ...how "unhappy" most of us still are despite all our hard work , despite how much we may own or be able to buy for them. They see that the people they turn to for mentorship and guidance still do not know how to live or to just be. They see that the way we are doing things now is not going to work much longer. They see that the human race, as well s the planet, is in trouble.
The Burden of Change
No wonder why there seems to be such a collective sense of hopelessness and fear amongst the 20 something population. The deep resounding vibration of, "The world has gotta change," has been dumped on their shoulders to carry. And as we continue to do what we have been doing, they can no longer follow; they can no longer trust that ego force that keeps us moving in this direction. They see that our ways are not only unhealthy but also destructive. Yet, most of us have our heads stuck so far into habitual patterns, we do not see it...therefore we are not only unable to help relieve the loads they carry but we add to them.
We all have to Wake Up!
If we want to help our youth. We all have to wake up . We have to take a good look at how we are living, how we are pursuing this idea of happiness, how we are denying what is. We have to examine our mental formations, have a good look at the mind and choose to learn to use it skillfully rather than just being pulled along by a collective mind, as we are now. We have to recognize, accept and transform our own suffering so we can help them transform theirs. We have to prioritize instead of stigmatize the need for better mental health for all of us.
Life is an inside game. Mind healing has to be a priority. Our problems begin in the mind and can only be solved in the mind. We need to learn and teach that. Let's teach our kids how to find peace, joy, Love through their recognizing, allowing, embracing and looking deeply into suffering.
Let's discover that for ourselves first. If we cannot wake up, how are we going to help them wake up? We need to wake up for them!
All is well.
Thursday, June 18, 2020
Listening with Karuna
We will sit and listen without any prejudice. We will sit and listen without judging or reacting. We will sit and listen in order to understand. We will sit and listen so attentively that we will be able to hear what's being said and also what is being left unsaid. We know that just by listening deeply, we already alleviate much pain and suffering in the other person.
Thich Nhat Hanh; peace is every breath; 104
My heart is heavy. I wrote yesterday (as I have many times before) about things and circumstances I really want in my life that I believe ( without knowing anything for sure) will bring my living to a state of peace and fulfillment. Amongst the things I want to be "doing" , if I am to "do" anything, is to create a service or be a service for our youth, especially in the area of addiction and mental health. I see such "need" there, such suffering. That suffering has been touching my life experience directly.
Yesterday...after writing that... I was reminded with one situation after another...boom...boom...boom...how big this need is, how much our young adults are suffering.
I had two of my daughters outwardly expressing their suffering and a sense of helplessness that it will never go away. That broke my heart. I couldn't "fix" it for them! Then I had another loved one show up higher than a kite after a few months of some degree of sobriety, and breaching parole. I was made aware that his actions once again were putting him and others at risk. Then, I was told some very sad news about my daughter's friend who apparently took his own life in a very violent way yesterday. My heart got so heavy so fast. It felt like it would either shrivel up or explode.
Staying Open
I want to stay positive. I do not want to allow fear, anger, disappointment and a sense of helplessness to close me down. I want to stay open to all Life puts in front of me...so I can give my best...and if my mind is responsible for what Life puts in front of me, I want to ensure even more that it is used very skillfully! I want to approach the suffering of others skillfully.
How Do We Approach and Help Transform the Suffering of Others?
What do we do, then, when it comes to handling the suffering of others? I know now that we do not turn away from it, ignore it, deny it, repress it ( no matter how heavy it feels in our hearts). That is not the answer. Compassion is! Compassion or "Karuna", according to Buddhist teachings, is the capacity to understand the suffering in another and to help to transform it. We must recognize it, allow it into our hearts, embrace it there...embrace the suffering of the other as well as our own and then we look at it deeply.
Step One: Seek to Understand.
At this point I do not understand why this population of younger individuals is suffering so much. I can speculate. I can say that the electronic age has reduced personalization to a screen that requires a certain degree of competition and comparison in order to feel worthy. The things they are comparing to are unrealistic portrayals that they cannot attain or maintain, leading to a chronic state of unworthiness. And on top of that they are lonely for direct contact!
I can say that our youth are becoming label dependent and are seeking and therefore succumbing to the diagnosis'/conceptual realities of various mental disorders that we would have passed off in our day as something you just needed to get through, "anxiety", "depression", " addiction", "eating disorders".
I can say that kids are not given the opportunity to learn how to deal with intense emotions. They are overwhelmed by them and see them as something to avoid at all costs. We live in a "numbing" age, a "keep busy and don't sit still with your Self" age, and a "look away from real life into your screen" age....not a "this is suffering, a normal part of the human experience, and this is how you deal with it" age.
I also think that our youth are actually waking up a lot faster than we are. They are realizing that "This , what we are doing, is not the way to go!" and that is unsettling , confusing and fear producing. They look to us for guidance and so few of us are awake enough to assist them in the transition. They are often lost!
Of course, I do not know for sure why our youth are suffering so. I just know they are. The only way to truly understand is to listen deeply, offering our space and presence for them to do that. Are we, as their elders and mentors, offering that?
So we need to understand why they are suffering before we can begin to help them transform that suffering. We cannot, however, get lost in it.
Step Two: Stay Out of the Hole
When I speak of helping others who are emotionally suffering, I always use the analogy of someone who fell down into this deep hole. If you want to help you do not jump into the hole with that person...If you do, both of you will be stuck there. The best thing is be where you are and help from there. Of course when people are in pain, they want you in the hole with them, just for company. They may use whatever they have in their unhealthy tool box to pull you down with them. And it is also easy to become so overwhelmed with how the suffering of others impacts your little sense of "self" that you can find yourself in a hole as well. It is so important , however, to stay out of the hole! Keep space between Self and suffering and be aware of that space. Observe it from a calm, spacious distance.
Step Three: Listen Deeply
As I sat across from one of my daughter's yesterday who suffers greatly with a diagnosed Borderline Disorder, I found myself watching and asking from (and to) a deeper place, "What do I do with this?" How can I best help her?" In that moment, I knew that it was best to just be there...to be present and open and spacious...to listen. I cannot say I was a perfect listener, because I wasn't, but I can say when "I" stop getting in the way...I can be pretty effective in this role.
As Thich Nhat Hanh teaches deep listening is a selfless, patient act.
...when we offer someone our practice of deep listening. we do it with the sole aim of helping them empty their heart and release their pain. When we can stay focused on that aim, we can continue to listen deeply, even when the person's speech may contain a lot of wrong perceptions, bitterness, sarcasm, judgment and accusation .
It isn't always easy but when we listen from the higher Self, putting our own noisy little egos away, when we put away our judgments and our "I told you so's", we can offer something precious that will help transform suffering. We as the older population, the mentors of our youth need to be willing to listen. We can affect so much change by simply offering our youth an hour of our undivided attention. Are we able to do that? Am I?
Step Four: Check in with Self
When we have recognized and allowed the suffering of this often troubled age group into our hearts; when we embrace their suffering and look deeply into it through our listening and presence...we can then take that back into Self . We do not let ego or drama step in and tell us how to handle the situations we encounter. We allow Self to tell us how to proceed. Maybe we will be guided or inspired to do something specific like set up a sober house, a support group, to volunteer for a crisis line , to donate. Or maybe we will simply be guided to talk openly about the issues, to listen more and be there more. Maybe we can actually learn from our youth about our own need to wake up.
We do need, before we offer true compassion to others, to be kind and compassionate to ourselves. Before we assist others into a skilful way of being mentally emotionally, we have to be in using our own minds skillfully. Are we?
When we use our minds skillfully, our hearts will open wide enough to allow the suffering in without it shrivelling up or exploding. That's pretty cool.
Hmmm!
Anyway...my desire to help will guide me to where I need to be in order to make some semblance of a difference, however small. It is all good.
All is well in my world.
Thich Nhat Hanh ( 2011) peace is every breath. Harper One
Thich Nhat Hanh; peace is every breath; 104
My heart is heavy. I wrote yesterday (as I have many times before) about things and circumstances I really want in my life that I believe ( without knowing anything for sure) will bring my living to a state of peace and fulfillment. Amongst the things I want to be "doing" , if I am to "do" anything, is to create a service or be a service for our youth, especially in the area of addiction and mental health. I see such "need" there, such suffering. That suffering has been touching my life experience directly.
Yesterday...after writing that... I was reminded with one situation after another...boom...boom...boom...how big this need is, how much our young adults are suffering.
I had two of my daughters outwardly expressing their suffering and a sense of helplessness that it will never go away. That broke my heart. I couldn't "fix" it for them! Then I had another loved one show up higher than a kite after a few months of some degree of sobriety, and breaching parole. I was made aware that his actions once again were putting him and others at risk. Then, I was told some very sad news about my daughter's friend who apparently took his own life in a very violent way yesterday. My heart got so heavy so fast. It felt like it would either shrivel up or explode.
Staying Open
I want to stay positive. I do not want to allow fear, anger, disappointment and a sense of helplessness to close me down. I want to stay open to all Life puts in front of me...so I can give my best...and if my mind is responsible for what Life puts in front of me, I want to ensure even more that it is used very skillfully! I want to approach the suffering of others skillfully.
How Do We Approach and Help Transform the Suffering of Others?
What do we do, then, when it comes to handling the suffering of others? I know now that we do not turn away from it, ignore it, deny it, repress it ( no matter how heavy it feels in our hearts). That is not the answer. Compassion is! Compassion or "Karuna", according to Buddhist teachings, is the capacity to understand the suffering in another and to help to transform it. We must recognize it, allow it into our hearts, embrace it there...embrace the suffering of the other as well as our own and then we look at it deeply.
Step One: Seek to Understand.
At this point I do not understand why this population of younger individuals is suffering so much. I can speculate. I can say that the electronic age has reduced personalization to a screen that requires a certain degree of competition and comparison in order to feel worthy. The things they are comparing to are unrealistic portrayals that they cannot attain or maintain, leading to a chronic state of unworthiness. And on top of that they are lonely for direct contact!
I can say that our youth are becoming label dependent and are seeking and therefore succumbing to the diagnosis'/conceptual realities of various mental disorders that we would have passed off in our day as something you just needed to get through, "anxiety", "depression", " addiction", "eating disorders".
I can say that kids are not given the opportunity to learn how to deal with intense emotions. They are overwhelmed by them and see them as something to avoid at all costs. We live in a "numbing" age, a "keep busy and don't sit still with your Self" age, and a "look away from real life into your screen" age....not a "this is suffering, a normal part of the human experience, and this is how you deal with it" age.
I also think that our youth are actually waking up a lot faster than we are. They are realizing that "This , what we are doing, is not the way to go!" and that is unsettling , confusing and fear producing. They look to us for guidance and so few of us are awake enough to assist them in the transition. They are often lost!
Of course, I do not know for sure why our youth are suffering so. I just know they are. The only way to truly understand is to listen deeply, offering our space and presence for them to do that. Are we, as their elders and mentors, offering that?
So we need to understand why they are suffering before we can begin to help them transform that suffering. We cannot, however, get lost in it.
Step Two: Stay Out of the Hole
When I speak of helping others who are emotionally suffering, I always use the analogy of someone who fell down into this deep hole. If you want to help you do not jump into the hole with that person...If you do, both of you will be stuck there. The best thing is be where you are and help from there. Of course when people are in pain, they want you in the hole with them, just for company. They may use whatever they have in their unhealthy tool box to pull you down with them. And it is also easy to become so overwhelmed with how the suffering of others impacts your little sense of "self" that you can find yourself in a hole as well. It is so important , however, to stay out of the hole! Keep space between Self and suffering and be aware of that space. Observe it from a calm, spacious distance.
Step Three: Listen Deeply
As I sat across from one of my daughter's yesterday who suffers greatly with a diagnosed Borderline Disorder, I found myself watching and asking from (and to) a deeper place, "What do I do with this?" How can I best help her?" In that moment, I knew that it was best to just be there...to be present and open and spacious...to listen. I cannot say I was a perfect listener, because I wasn't, but I can say when "I" stop getting in the way...I can be pretty effective in this role.
As Thich Nhat Hanh teaches deep listening is a selfless, patient act.
...when we offer someone our practice of deep listening. we do it with the sole aim of helping them empty their heart and release their pain. When we can stay focused on that aim, we can continue to listen deeply, even when the person's speech may contain a lot of wrong perceptions, bitterness, sarcasm, judgment and accusation .
It isn't always easy but when we listen from the higher Self, putting our own noisy little egos away, when we put away our judgments and our "I told you so's", we can offer something precious that will help transform suffering. We as the older population, the mentors of our youth need to be willing to listen. We can affect so much change by simply offering our youth an hour of our undivided attention. Are we able to do that? Am I?
Step Four: Check in with Self
When we have recognized and allowed the suffering of this often troubled age group into our hearts; when we embrace their suffering and look deeply into it through our listening and presence...we can then take that back into Self . We do not let ego or drama step in and tell us how to handle the situations we encounter. We allow Self to tell us how to proceed. Maybe we will be guided or inspired to do something specific like set up a sober house, a support group, to volunteer for a crisis line , to donate. Or maybe we will simply be guided to talk openly about the issues, to listen more and be there more. Maybe we can actually learn from our youth about our own need to wake up.
We do need, before we offer true compassion to others, to be kind and compassionate to ourselves. Before we assist others into a skilful way of being mentally emotionally, we have to be in using our own minds skillfully. Are we?
When we use our minds skillfully, our hearts will open wide enough to allow the suffering in without it shrivelling up or exploding. That's pretty cool.
Hmmm!
Anyway...my desire to help will guide me to where I need to be in order to make some semblance of a difference, however small. It is all good.
All is well in my world.
Thich Nhat Hanh ( 2011) peace is every breath. Harper One
Wednesday, June 17, 2020
Renewing the Mind
Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is-His good, pleasing and perfect will.
Romans 12: 2 NIV https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Romans+12%3A2&version=NIV
I have a desire to test what a renewal of the mind will do. I have a desire to know what God's perfect will for me and all of us is. So Uell S. Andersen challenges us to partake in a 30 day mental fast from all negative thinking on the premise if we think only positively we will connect to God's Will for us.
Does our thinking create the world around us?
Still pondering that question and in one breath I am saying, "Would that not be an amazing thing?" and in the next, "Oh My God! Look what I have done! I better get rid of that negativity before I have to go through one more self created challenge, before I cause more pain and suffering for myself and others!" The possibility of this being true causes both awe and panic.
What about you? How do you feel about the possibility of this being true? And if there was even the slimmest possibility that it was true, what would you do differently? Would you have to do a lot of "cognitive restructuring", changing old nasty thoughts and beliefs ingrained in that subconscious mind of yours? Are you even aware of what you got going on up there, out there or in there ( wherever the subconscious mind actually is)? Do you know whether your thoughts are primarily positive, negative or neutral? Are you aware of how these thoughts affect your Life?
Our Thoughts Do Have An Impact On our Lives
Regardless if they are the actual cause of everything before you, I guarantee, in one way or another they do affect you. As I have studied, learned and written so many times before, thoughts and beliefs affect our bodies... therefore they are, at least partially, responsible for our physical health. (Read something on the Placebo and Nocebo effect, or something by Bruce Lipton or Dr. Lissa Rankin.) Thoughts and beliefs also affect our emotional experiences and our mental health. Ask any psychologist or psychiatrist about the truth of this.
So our thoughts do affect us. If they are positive, we will feel "good" and if they are negative we will feel "bad". We get that, don't we? Is that not reason enough to try to think more positively? To change our thinking so we feel better physically and emotionally? And if we feel better emotionally and physically are we not going to improve our lives?
A Chance to Observe and Examine The Mind
We cannot even begin to readjust our thinking and believing until we know what we are thinking and believing. Shouldn't we all know that, instead of going blindly reactively through Life?
Hmmm! This 30 day challenge I will embark on in the near future is not only going to give me an opportunity to test the hypothesis: If you change your thinking, you will change your life (considering, of course, the variables of individual experience as both subject and object), but it is also going to give me the chance to really examine my own mind. To look deeply into it, to see what thoughts I have going on in the conscious mind and most importantly what seeds/ prompters/ core beliefs I have buried deep within the subconscious. It will give me the opportunity to see how this mind of mine effects my body and my emotional living experience. That in itself, is a good reason for taking part in such a fast, right?
Will Circumstances Change?
Then I will test it further to see if the external circumstances I think are responsible for the "good" experiences and the "bad" experiences of my life actually change when I refuse to think negatively for 30 days. Is my health going to change? Am I going to have more energy? Am I going to have less pain? Is this mass finally going to be diagnosed, removed? Is my house going to fall into order? Is my writing going to get published? Is my present 4 digit annual salary going to increase? Will I be able to keep the house when the disability insurance runs out in October? Are my children going to be well and happy?
I don't think I ask for much here, do I? My desiring is pretty basic but still it is a leap from what I am presently learning to accept. The thing is I am learning to accept this life the way it is now and appreciate it, find blessing in it and even enjoy it. So even if my circumstances do not change ...I will be okay.
Do Circumstances Have to Change for Me to Get What I Really Want?
That brings up the question: Am I settling with less than and making the most of my situation because I have doubt it will change, can change? Is my being okay with what is, going to be a hindrance or a promoter of me getting more?
I mean I could ask for even more than the basic. I would love to travel, to have my books published and making a difference in people's lives, to teach on stages across the world, to create and be a service to all the causes I find touch me deeply: addiction, mental illness, aging support, feeding and educating poverty stricken children, palliative care. Those would be cool circumstances...they really would be but I also know I do not need to wait until I have those things manifesting in my day to day experiences to truly have what I want: Peace, Faith, joy and laughter.
What do I really, really want then? I want the freedom from this thing that has been dragging me down all my life...fear. I want peace of mind and connection with God's Will for me. I get that and it wouldn't matter if I was digging ditches for the rest of my life with a shackle around my ankle, would it?
Hmm! Getting ahead of myself. The main purpose of my partaking in this 30 day mental fast is to help me examine and know my mind better and to see how it is affecting me and my life. Determining whether a change in thought changes external circumstances, is secondary.
And though thy knees were never bent ;To heaven thy hourly prayers are sent ;And whether formed for good or ill ;Are registered and answered still.
Ralph Waldo Emerson
It is all good! All is well in my world.
Andersen, Uell S.. Three Magic Words . BN Publishing. Kindle Edition.
Romans 12: 2 NIV https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Romans+12%3A2&version=NIV
I have a desire to test what a renewal of the mind will do. I have a desire to know what God's perfect will for me and all of us is. So Uell S. Andersen challenges us to partake in a 30 day mental fast from all negative thinking on the premise if we think only positively we will connect to God's Will for us.
Does our thinking create the world around us?
Still pondering that question and in one breath I am saying, "Would that not be an amazing thing?" and in the next, "Oh My God! Look what I have done! I better get rid of that negativity before I have to go through one more self created challenge, before I cause more pain and suffering for myself and others!" The possibility of this being true causes both awe and panic.
What about you? How do you feel about the possibility of this being true? And if there was even the slimmest possibility that it was true, what would you do differently? Would you have to do a lot of "cognitive restructuring", changing old nasty thoughts and beliefs ingrained in that subconscious mind of yours? Are you even aware of what you got going on up there, out there or in there ( wherever the subconscious mind actually is)? Do you know whether your thoughts are primarily positive, negative or neutral? Are you aware of how these thoughts affect your Life?
Our Thoughts Do Have An Impact On our Lives
Regardless if they are the actual cause of everything before you, I guarantee, in one way or another they do affect you. As I have studied, learned and written so many times before, thoughts and beliefs affect our bodies... therefore they are, at least partially, responsible for our physical health. (Read something on the Placebo and Nocebo effect, or something by Bruce Lipton or Dr. Lissa Rankin.) Thoughts and beliefs also affect our emotional experiences and our mental health. Ask any psychologist or psychiatrist about the truth of this.
So our thoughts do affect us. If they are positive, we will feel "good" and if they are negative we will feel "bad". We get that, don't we? Is that not reason enough to try to think more positively? To change our thinking so we feel better physically and emotionally? And if we feel better emotionally and physically are we not going to improve our lives?
A Chance to Observe and Examine The Mind
We cannot even begin to readjust our thinking and believing until we know what we are thinking and believing. Shouldn't we all know that, instead of going blindly reactively through Life?
Hmmm! This 30 day challenge I will embark on in the near future is not only going to give me an opportunity to test the hypothesis: If you change your thinking, you will change your life (considering, of course, the variables of individual experience as both subject and object), but it is also going to give me the chance to really examine my own mind. To look deeply into it, to see what thoughts I have going on in the conscious mind and most importantly what seeds/ prompters/ core beliefs I have buried deep within the subconscious. It will give me the opportunity to see how this mind of mine effects my body and my emotional living experience. That in itself, is a good reason for taking part in such a fast, right?
Will Circumstances Change?
Then I will test it further to see if the external circumstances I think are responsible for the "good" experiences and the "bad" experiences of my life actually change when I refuse to think negatively for 30 days. Is my health going to change? Am I going to have more energy? Am I going to have less pain? Is this mass finally going to be diagnosed, removed? Is my house going to fall into order? Is my writing going to get published? Is my present 4 digit annual salary going to increase? Will I be able to keep the house when the disability insurance runs out in October? Are my children going to be well and happy?
I don't think I ask for much here, do I? My desiring is pretty basic but still it is a leap from what I am presently learning to accept. The thing is I am learning to accept this life the way it is now and appreciate it, find blessing in it and even enjoy it. So even if my circumstances do not change ...I will be okay.
Do Circumstances Have to Change for Me to Get What I Really Want?
That brings up the question: Am I settling with less than and making the most of my situation because I have doubt it will change, can change? Is my being okay with what is, going to be a hindrance or a promoter of me getting more?
I mean I could ask for even more than the basic. I would love to travel, to have my books published and making a difference in people's lives, to teach on stages across the world, to create and be a service to all the causes I find touch me deeply: addiction, mental illness, aging support, feeding and educating poverty stricken children, palliative care. Those would be cool circumstances...they really would be but I also know I do not need to wait until I have those things manifesting in my day to day experiences to truly have what I want: Peace, Faith, joy and laughter.
What do I really, really want then? I want the freedom from this thing that has been dragging me down all my life...fear. I want peace of mind and connection with God's Will for me. I get that and it wouldn't matter if I was digging ditches for the rest of my life with a shackle around my ankle, would it?
Hmm! Getting ahead of myself. The main purpose of my partaking in this 30 day mental fast is to help me examine and know my mind better and to see how it is affecting me and my life. Determining whether a change in thought changes external circumstances, is secondary.
And though thy knees were never bent ;To heaven thy hourly prayers are sent ;And whether formed for good or ill ;Are registered and answered still.
Ralph Waldo Emerson
It is all good! All is well in my world.
Andersen, Uell S.. Three Magic Words . BN Publishing. Kindle Edition.
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