For whoever will save his life, will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it. For what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world but forfeits his soul?
Matthew 16: 25-26 ESV
The focus of what I am reading and listening to right now is all serendipitously centered around the idea that this world can not fulfill us in the way "self: little me" wants it to...nor can it fulfill us in the way Self wants it to, because Self is already fulfilled.
Vivekananda in his lectures on Jnana Yoga, way back in the late 1800's and very early 1900's, spoke of these words. A true yogi recognizes and deeply respects the teachings of Christ. Yet, many, many people who call themselves Christians see these yogic teachings as blasphemous. Sigh! These words make more sense to me through my yogi perspective than they ever did through my Catechism. Am I being blaspemous or just honest? And do you think Christ would care what I called myself with words and ideations or would He simply be glad that I understood what He was saying and was willing to live by it? (Of course, a yogi with a spiritual ego, who is initatied in a special way, may look at what I am saying as untrue and unfounded because they may look at me with contempt for even calling myself a yogi,)
'Christian' is just a word, 'yogi' is just a word, and 'Soul' is just a word, right? What the word 'soul' points to is of upmost importance but the word itself (as well as the connotations, convictions, and associations we humans in our collective forces tend to wrap words in) is not. I do not want to forfeit my 'soul' ( my section of conscousness, this life experience, my deeper Self) over anything the world might have to offer. I do not want to spend any more time doing this thing we humans tend to do: selecting and pushing away what the world offers as if what I want is more important than what I am here for. I see so clearly how it doesn't work. Happiness can not be found in worldly things! It really cant be. I know from the years I spent on this planet so far that the world cannot give me what I truly need and want. Man, I have been trying to get it from the world for way too many years...unsuccessfully. My grasping and pushing away doesn't work for more than a few moments at a time. The world has yet to give this human I call 'me' and lasting form of peace and happiness. It isn't suppose to! And besides, "Me" cannot be happy. We need to go deeper beyond desire.
I also see how it wasn't 'soul' that was searching for this gratification but this idea of "me" that was. And "me" is just another word...pointing to psyche , personality, a concept, a thought but nothing with true substance. It isn't who I am...just a 'spacesuit' that I wear. It is me that desires, not soul. The more "me" desires...the "more" it wants from 'out there'. It is never satisfied. The more we try to preserve this idea of me and its life...the more we will seek happiness in worldly things. Not only will we not find happiness by doing so, we will lose connection with what is real. We will forfeit the Soul. It is only when we are willing to lose this life: this idea of me...will we find Life.
Hmm!
There comes a time when the mind awakens from this long and dreary dream-the child gives up its play and wants to go back to its mother. It finds the truth of this statement, "Desire is never satisfied by the enjoyment of desires, it only increases the more, as fire, when butter is poured upon it."
Let's stop pouring butter on the fire.
All is well. ( It certainly isn't 'easy' right now...a lot going on for 'this human' to deal with...but it is well for that which "I am.")
Swami Vivekanada ( n.d.) Section 2.5: Jnana-Yoga; Complete Works. Kindle Edition
No comments:
Post a Comment