Feeling the Energy

Everything is energy. Your thought begins it, your emotion amplifies it, and your action increases the momentum.

Unknown

Have you ever watched your energy levels?

Say what crazy lady?

Have you ever just noticed when your energy is down mentally and physically and when it is up?  I am sure you felt both up and down at certain times in your life. I am sure you had times when you felt like you could run a marathon ( or at least a half marathon) and times when getting out of bed felt like a chore. I am sure there were times you felt joy, excitement, enthusiasm and times you felt depressed or very frustrated with your present situation. The point is, you know what that feels like.  You may not call it such but you do know energy.  And it really doesn't matter what you call it...really. Some may call it physical, emotional or mental health...some may call it biology...some may  call it psychology...some may call it spirituality. It is all just energy!  As a yogi, I tend to call it Shakti. 

I am very aware...only because I make it a point to be...of my energy levels. I observe when ...for some reason...the Shakti begins to flow through all my many blockages (and I have a very thick jungle of samskara in here). I feel phyiscally well...like I could run a marathon. I feel motivated to do so many things with this energy. I want to serve others without much thought of outcome or "me" gratification. In fact, there is so little me at these time.  I am so grateful for everything.  I put great time and effort happily into tasks and chores ( like this book).  I also feel this creative inspiration in me...this flow of  a powerful something that wants to come out on the paper or be heard ( if only by me). I write, write, write. At these times, I witness all the suffering around me with great compassion  but I see more light than dark.  It doesn't pull me down. I see beyond the suffering of others to that equanimity which is within us all. It is amazing and exhilerating when that energy is high like that. 

I also observe when my energy is down, like it is now. I observe when I do not feel so well physically...tired and lethargic, in pain( I wake up every morning with this pain in my left lower quadrant , regardless of energy level...but when energy is low I resist it more). I still feel grateful but I question why things are not working out for this human.  I notice the tendency for envy and self pity to arise ( as it did yesterday ). These are times when I still continue to write but I question why I am writing.  I notice at these times ...how little I am doing and the effect of my lack of doing: Entropy with a capitol "E"in the environment around me. The creative inspirations gets replaced by so much doubt, obligation and a thought of outcome.  These are times when the suffering of others seems to be soaked up by my pores like I am a giant emotional sponge. I feel so heavy at these times. I start to feel like I am this body and mind. The light, that I know is there, can not be seen through the jungle bush of samskara. Little shakti flows through. Sigh!

So, I observe the rise and fall of energy, just as I observe the rise and fall of all physical phenomena around me.  Things come and things go.  I am okay with that. I really am.  I am not asking (well for the most part lol) that things out there change so as not to disturb the biodiversity of my samskara jungle...but that I learn how to use this internal  machete that will help me slash through the bush and brush of my stored stuff so the light  can come through freely, the way it is intended to. I am fully aware as to why my energy level is down...the samskara jungle is overgrown and I negatively assume there is no way through when the energy drops low enough. I do have to work on two things:. The first is thinning out this mess that is blocking the energy flow and two: this tendency I have toward negativity when energy is low. Hmm!

I do believe though that part of the reason I am low is because the samskaras are unsettling and moving up for release. I am feeling the discomfort of that which was stored in pain as it makes its way back up...like the burn one would get upon vomiting a corrosive they ingested. Sometimes, it hurts more coming out. It is a necessary burn though...one I am more than willing to experience if it frees Self from 'me' and allows this energy to flow in the direction it so wants to...which is up, of course.

All is well in my world. 

Michael A. Singer/ Temple of the Universe ( August 19, 2024) Working With Your Inner Energy Flow.https://tou.org/talks/