Monday, January 14, 2019

It Doesn't Matter

It really doesn't matter.
-Bill Murray

  I watched an interesting documentary on Netflix last night about Bill Murray.  (Please see the link below).  I was surprised to find how awake he was.  I was also reminded of a statement he was often overheard reciting both on and off screen: It really doesn't matter. I see the connection now that that phrase has with his own life and in all of ours actually.  It is a wonderful mantra in itself.  The truth is that all this phenomenon of our living...how it all plays out...really doesn't matter as long as we stay in the present moment.

Eckhart Tolle  reminded  me today as I listened to some of his teaching of two stories I love to tell in relation to this idea that It really doesn't matter. The one called "Maybe" I shared on Sept 25th and this one entitled "Is that so,"  I would like to share now.  Please know that these stories are ancient and have been passed around the globe for centuries...every version, including my version, will differ in many ways but the point remains: It really doesn't matter.

Is That So
 
 
Many years ago in a small Japanese village there lived a very respected and revered Zen master.  Because of his great reputation he received many people who flocked to him for advice and teaching.  Among the students were many of the local villagers including a young 15 year old girl.  The young girl had a free spirit and her parents found it hard to contain her desire to push the family order to the limit. When they brought the girl, kicking and screaming, to the master one day explaining that their daughter desperately needed his guidance, the Zen master stroked his bearded chin and answered in his calm,  unflinching way, "Is that so?"
 
He allowed the girl to become one of his pupils. She was a reluctant student, restless in class and often leaving in the middle of satsangs to return only before her parents arrived to walk her home.  The Zen master offered her the same effort, respect and consideration he offered all his students without trying to control the outcome of her learning or her life.
 
One evening the parents of the girl came pounding at  the master's door. With faces aflame with anger they told the master that their daughter was pregnant and that she had told them that he, the master, was the father. The Zen master, looked at the parents, stroked his long beard and said in his calm unflinching way, "Is that so?" 

The parents accused the master of taking advantage of their daughter and of ruining her and their lives.   They promised they were going to let the entire village know how corrupt and immoral the master  actually was. The Zen master just stroked his beard and answered in his calm, unflinching way, "Is that so?"

Disgusted by his arrogance, the parents stormed away and proceeded to tell all the villagers about the horrible thing the master had done to their daughter. The village was aghast. All of the parents who had children being taught stormed to the master's house to remove their children from the teaching.  They told the master that they would never allow their children to be contaminated by such a man and that he should be ashamed.  The Zen master looked at them all, stroked his beard and answered, "Is that so?"

 His school crumbled and he was left poor and destitute,  scorned and outcasted by the village. People taunted him, threatened to harm him, and  threw things at his house as they passed by. Even the local merchants  banned together and told him one day that they would not sell their goods to him. He stroked his long bearded chin as they closed their doors on him and said, "Is that so?"

Everyday since he was forced to walk miles to beg for what he needed just to survive. His aging body resented the effort but still he walked without complaint or defense.
 
Eight months later, the parents of the girl came pounding once again at his door.  They  pushed a new born baby angrily into the arms of the master.  "This is your baby.  We do not want it because of the shameful way it was conceived.  We give it to you to look after."  To which the Zen master replied, stroking his chin with his free hand and in his calm, unflinching way, "Is that so?"
 
He took the baby in and took care of it.  He walked for miles with it on his back everyday to get milk and food.  He got up at night with it.  He rocked it. He held it. He showed nothing but pure loving kindness toward the baby. Meanwhile the villagers continued  to throw things at his house and threaten him  whenever he walked by.  He responded to their insults and accusations each  and every time by stroking his long beard and in his calm, unflinching way saying, "Is that so?"
 
Four months later the girl's parents came to the door again.  Red faced with shame they knelt in the doorway before the master.  The girl's mother crying, looked up at the old man , "We were wrong" she said, "We have done you so much injustice.  Our daughter told us that you are not the father, that you have treated her with nothing but respect.  She admitted to leaving the satsangs and going off with one of the neighborhood boys." 
 
"Is that so? " the Zen master replied stroking his beard and with the same  calm unflinching voice.
 
"Yes," the father answered, "And we would desperately like the child back." Again the Zen master stroked his long beard and in his calm, unflinching way responded, "Is that so?"
 
He left the doorway and went to where the child was sleeping.  He bundled her up, packed the supplies he had bought for her and kissing her gently on the forehead  handed the child and the supplies to the parents.
 
"We will make amends," the parents assured.  "We will tell the villagers the truth about you so they honor you once again for being such a good and honest man, one willing to take a child in and care for it even when it was not your own." 
 
Once again the Zen master just  stroked his long beard and in his calm, unflinching way said, "Is that so?"

It really doesn't matter

What the Zen master was truly saying whenever he was confronting the lies, the accusations or even the praise was that none of it mattered.  What people thought of him, good or bad, didn't matter.  What he owned or lost didn't matter.  The truth about who the father was didn't matter.   Any suffering he might have endured didn't matter.

All that mattered was what was taking place in front of him each and every moment and he dealt with that as it came.  The child needed him in that moment so he cared for her even though it wasn't his. Just as quickly as he accepted the child, he gave the child up.  There was no attachment, no clinging, no defending, no attacking and no resistance what so ever. There was nothing  but a complete allowing of Life to do as life does. All else simply didn't matter.

Hmmm! A lot of learning to be gained by his example.

All is well!




References:


The Bill Murray Stories: Life lessons Learned from a Mythical Man (2018) Netflix

Tolle, Eckhart (Jan 2019) A Deeper Knowing. Eckhart Tolle TV. Retrieved from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EFJhXZgeJWU

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