You Know You are a Hick when...

I say half your life is spent trying to get out of a small town, and the other half trying to get back to one.
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You know you are a hick when...when  airport security asks you to stand on the red line you turn your back to them and lift your arms in preparation for the frisk you see on TV shows... only to have them  tell you to turn around and go through the archway like a "normal person".

You know you are a hick when...you can read the airline  magazine twice because it so " interesting".

You know you are a hick when...you get excited over the "cute little" package of cookies or pretzels the  airline offers you for a snack.

You know you are a hick when...you can't get your head around the fact that you are suspended miles and miles in the air...when only a little over a 100 years ago the idea of flying was deemed "impossible."

You know you are a hick when...you wore hard to walk in flip flops because you assume you will be able to  step into Pearson airport off the plane and walk right out the door to a waiting taxi cab.

You know you are a hick when...you are prevented from crossing lanes of traffic to go into an unmarked vehicle  that is hailing "Come!  Taxi!" from half a kilometer away from where the taxi line up is .

You know you are a hick when...some kind soul pulls you away from the oncoming traffic that you assumed would be courteous and super aware of new to the city  pedestrians as you walk into it.

You know you are a hick when...you believe that "only minutes away from the airport"  is like five or ten minutes away, not a 50 minute taxi drive.

You know you are a hick when... only five minutes into the city you are looking above the massive buildings to the sky and are saddened by the fact that you cannot find one single star in it.  The lights around you are not the lights that impress you.

You know you are a hick when...you instantly drop your bags in the middle of the  lobby  of the Hilton and look up completely amazed by the architecture and size of the building, as well as  the ten floor glass elevator.  You are even more amazed at the more "cool" people who are now  staring at you because you are amazed.

You know you are a hick when...you sit in a crowded bar for 30 minutes, wanting nothing more than a sandwich,  only to be completely ignored as all the "more cool"  people around you get waited on and served.

You know you are a hick when...you have to jump on the bed in the hotel room to test it out.

You know you are a hick when...you long for the sound of cicadas and peepers in the middle of the night so you can sleep.

You know you are a hick when.... you travel down the 401 or the 407.  (I need not say more....only that you know if it was you behind the wheel, you would have your eyes closed and your foot on the brake the whole time.)

You know you are a hick when... you ask people how  they can stand being in a car for up to six hours a day and they just look at you like you are crazy, "Well...you got to do what you got to do.  You get used to it."  You know you never could nor would you want to.

You know you are a hick when...you wonder where all the  people in the city are going and why because  after they reach their destination they just seem to spend the time planning the way back.

You know you are a hick when...you feel like you were the one who got married as you walk away from the wedding reception with a beautiful bouquet of flowers that was once the centerpiece on one of the many elaborately decorated tables, bottles of complementary wine, boxes of sweets,...all this after eating a magnificent three course meal that was to die for.  ("What did I have at my wedding?"  you may find yourself asking as the shoulders come up around the ears. "Oh, now I remember...I couldn't even afford wine for everyone so I gave them juice." Oh the shame of comparison.lol)

You know you are a hick when...your limited exposure to different languages and cultures becomes so obvious as you strain to listen to the wonderful varied tongues all around you and shamefully catch yourself staring at the beautiful faces and wardrobes   that look so different than your own.

You know you are a hick when...with butterflies in your belly, you want to see it all and experience it all while you are here and get disappointed when you know you can't do "everything" in three days!

You know you are a hick when...despite all the excitement, you still find yourself longing for the small streets, back yards that go for acres, skies that twinkle with stars at night and the friendly simplicity of life in a small coastal city.

You know you are a hick when...you hear the wheels of the airplane touching down on the runway of a much smaller airport,( one suited for flip flop wearing gals like myself) and you sigh with deepest appreciation, "Ah!  I'm home!"

You know you are a hick when...