Letting Go of Stuff Through Relationships

Every day of your life you can be higher than you were the day before...just let go of some of that stuff. 

Michael A. Singer

If you have ever read anything I have ever written or listened to anything I have ever said, you will see that I am committed to my sadhanna, my practice of healing, learning, growing and expanding. I am committed to untangling all the knots inside me that prevent me from realizing and being my true Self. I am committed to letting go of my stuff, and my 'self'. I know, in every cell of my being, that if I want to do anything truly positive and worthwhile in this life time, that is it.  It is the only truly significant work I could ever take part in.  Any service I provide out there, will be lacking until I do the work in here.  (That doesn't mean, of course, that I do not provide a service out there.  Providing service is a giant part of my sadhana. It will help me to remove the focus from "self" ( "little me") so that my focus eventually expands to Self which is everything. everyone...no thing/no one.)

Some partners need to do a lot of inside work

Anyway, I digress.  I am committed to my practice.  I wake up in the morning and I meditate.  I practice kriya yoga.  I come out here, on mornings I am not providing service elsewhere, and I listen, read, study something significant from another human who has already ascended or who is at least a head of me on this journey.  I absorb it, if it resonates, and I further my commitment to live by the teachings.  I write here, or do a silly video,  regurgitating my learning. I practice hatha yoga.  I teach hatha yoga. I take care of my pets. I feed my crows ...now 'crow'( yes, that is part of my practice). I spend time with my daughters or grandchildren. I walk in the woods with the dogs  surrounded by nature. I do all the other things of daily life. I cook and clean for self and others. ( Wellll...I could do a little more of the cleaning let me tell ya. ) . I read. I try to knit ( working on mitts for grandchildren and man...I am struggling lol). I watch too much TV in the evenings. I deal with each crisis or request for help from another when they unfold in front of me as best as I can. I read and meditate before sleep...and I start all over the next day.  Every moment is part of my practice.  I do my best to stay observant of my mind and my tendencies. I try to recognize when I am being pulled into them, to relax when I notice, and I gently call myself back. (I am getting gentler and more compassionate with self as I notice...which is a sign of my healing and my growth) Oh man, I fall flat on my face in the muck of my samskaras again and again but I am committed to letting them come up and out.  It isn't fun; it isn't easy; and it is far from comfortable...but I am committed to untangling this mess the true Self is caught up in. It is work for me to untangle, a lot of work. 

Others Don't

Then, I look at D. and I am floored. I see a man who had more challenge and trauma in his life than most, yet he isn't all tangled up in his samskaras like I seem to be. His ability to let go is phenomenal. There is so little reactivity and so much relaxed detachment in him.  He just walks through life lightly and gently, expecting little, grateful for all. And people seem to flock to him. They recognize that easiness in him.  The children and the teachers at school love him. Animals love him. Babies and toddlers love him.   He is like a warm May breeze that flows from one  open window to the next. Whatever he says or does in the presence of another just goes in and then out, but it leaves the other  bathing in warmth.  He has absolutely no idea what he is doing.  He doesn't meditate, nor is he the most aware or mindful person I know. He isn't putting effort or work into being like this. Infact, when he does start to practice with me he loses something natural.  This is simply the way he is. He is a person that would seldom trigger anyone into reactivity.

Triggered

Yet, I am apparently triggered by him at times. I am reactive around him. I share this because I believe reactivity  to be a common occurrence in long term relationships.  It is worthy of exploring as we "enter the laboratory of soul exploration" as part of our practice. Understanding our wants, our expectations, and  our needs when it comes to relationships could be a very big step forward toward our healing and  Self realization. Don't you think?

Why are we triggered in our so called "special relationships" (ACIM)? Why do we question them? 

The attraction of the unholy[special] relationship starts to fade and be questioned almost at once. Once it is formed, doubt must enter in, because its purpose is impossible. The ideal of the unholy [special] relationship thus becomes one in which the reality of the other does not enter at all to"spoil"  the dream. And the less the other really brings to the relationship, the "better" it becomes. Thus the attempt at union becomes a way of excluding even the one with whom the relationship was sought. For it was formed to get him out of it, and join with fantasies in uninterrupted "bliss".  ACIM-17:III: 4:3-8

The fantasy of what a relationship can bring versus the reality

Why am I triggered into reactivity by someone who is so non reactive? The first thing, I need to remember, is that what ego wants the relationship for ( to stop me from feeling the pain of stored impressions and to  create an illusion of bliss inside) is not what the higher me needs it for. 

Then I need to remember that if I am questioning the relationship, it has little to do with my partner. He is not the problem. Whatever disturbance may be going on inside me is mine...caused by "me" and was likely there long before I ever met him. The areas being unintentionally poked are simply a part of the tangled mess of my past. Whatever he may or may not be doing is simply triggering something that needs to be released. Instead of blaming him for "getting on my nerves",  "not being enough" or "too much", as humans tend to do when expectations are threatened in such relationships; instead of saying, "Okay...that is it.  This isn't good for me.  I am out of here!" ...I can/ we can take another approach.  We can take our attention off of the other person and put it back on self. 

 

Huh?

Instead of asking, "What is wrong with him or her or them ?", we  can ask, "What is wrong with me? What knot inside of me is his/her/their words, actions, presence untangling? Why am I closing up to love?" 

That is basically what the relationship disturbance is, isn't it? A closing up. A reactivation of a stored impression ...a triggering of a locked away memory from the past.  The other person is either not 'making' us happy by allowing space for the positive impressions we are clinging to,to arise as we assume they should,  or they are seemingly, (and unlikely unbeknownst to them)  unravelling and allowing the painful stuff to emerge as we assume they shouldn't. They are not matching any unreal expectation we had for them in this relationship. What he is doing, is not the problem.  My expectations and what I have stored within me, are.  Do you see that? 

When we are reacting, we are comparing and looking for inadequacies in the other. We are seeking to make them "wrong" so our resistance to experiencing what is coming up, our closing up to love, can be viewed as "right" and justified.  There is no right or wrong here...there is just the unwholesome closing and the wholesome opening of the heart to which we are entirely responsible.  One keeps us on the path towards Self realization, and one takes us off it. 

Comparison must be an ego device, for love has none. It is established by a lack seen in another, and maintained by searching for, and keeping clear in sight, all lacks it can perceive.  (ACIM, 24:II:1:1-3)

The more I examine this, the more I look at my reactivity, the more I put away ego comparison, I realize D.  is the perfect partner for me.  Not only because of his easy going nature, or what others see in him...but because he is triggering me.  I don't know why or how but he is.  If I am not triggered, I am not motivated enough to explore my samskaras and to eventually let them go. As a partner, he makes me look inside so I can do the work needed. He is in my life, possibly, to do that. He doesn't know it but he is an essential part of my sadhana. He is going to help me untangle and unravel once and for all. He is, without even trying to, helping me to heal.  He is touching my stuff, without meaning to, and I need to have this stuff poked so that it comes up and out.  

Once it is up and out...once I am clean and clear, I will see that the love, we so erroneously look for in another person, was always inside me.  I was just closing to it. That 'river of joy' Yogananda spoke of will flow again. 

Love is already in us, people. We don't get it from another person, but another person can help us to let go of the stuff that needs to be let go of.  We need to realize that. If we do let go, everyday of our lives can be higher than the day before. 

 As I continue to commit to my practice of becoming Self realized, free, whole, and the love I have spent my life looking for in others, I will see and appreciate D.'s natural "goodness" on a personal relationship  level, and I will honor what he does for me on the spiritual level. This does not have to be an "unholy special relationship, it can be a holy one.  I am so blessed to have him in my life.

All is well

Please note: Honoring and accepting our partners on the spiritual level, does not mean staying in abusive relationships or in relationships where the conscious or unconscious intent of another is malicious and undermining. Loving, protecting  and nurturing self is of utmost importance in your spiritual practice. If the relationship challenges your ability to do that, please get help!  

ACIM

 Michael A. Singer/ Temple of the Universe (December 11, 2023) Working Inside for Unconditional Well Being. https://tou.org/talks/

 

A Story About a Pig

 There is a story about a great king trapped in the body of a pig that I have heard many times in the 25 plus years I have been studying yoga.  I want to retell it now. 

King Indra, once a great king of the demigods, in the heavenly kingdom of Svargaloka  was often  arrogant in his post and had this tendency to offend others.  One day his tendency got him into trouble. He offended Brihaspathi, the spiritual master of all demigods.  

"Oh Indra," Brihaspathi roared, his thunderous voice echoing through the heavens, "Your rudeness has to be corrected.  Because you act like pig, I am sentencing you to a life as one!" 

The Great Spiritual Master called out to Brahmaji, the creator of earth and the entire material world.  "I am sending one of my own down to you.  Treat him as the pig he is, and not as a god. Let him wallow in the mud, eating nothing but man's leftovers from the filthy trough. "

 So as  punishment for his insolence, Indra  was exiled to earth to live his life out as a pig. He soon found himself in the obese and dirty swine's body , in a small little shelter that Brahmaji created for him, surrounded by mud and with a trough located in the far corner of the pen. He was devastated.  He tried using his powers to remove his spirit from the pig's body but he couldn't. He tried shouting out with a plea for release to Brihaspathi but all that would come from his mouth was a pathetic squeal. 

Feeling sorry for the demi god trapped in this pig, and knowing as well that he had to obey Brishapathi's orders, Brahmaji promised Indra that he would wipe all prior memory  from his mind so he would not miss his old life and could accept his pig life.  He promised that he would  keep the trough full with leftovers and that he would give him a mate so he did not feel so much alone. He kept his promise. Indra's memory of who he once was was wiped from his mind. The trough remained full and a lovely sow, in pig terms, was soon in the pen with Indra. 

While Indra was adapting to his life as a pig, things in Svargaloka were not going so well in his absence.  

"We need Indra back here," Brihaspathi ordered Brahmaji. "Go to him and tell him he is free to come home.  He no longer has to be a pig!"

Delighted to be able to free Indra from his miserable plight, Brahmaji went back to earth and to the pen Indra was confined to.  Sure enough, he found the pig wallowing in the mud with flies all around him.  A dirty sow was by his side nursing a dozen little piglets. 

"You are not a pig," Brahmaji called out.  

Indra looked up and replied, "Huh? Of course, I am a pig!  I have this lovely pig's body living in this wonderful warm mud with my beautiful wife by my side and all my sweet children at her breast.  What else would I be? "

"You are a God and you are wanted back in heaven."

"A God? No, I am not a God, nor do I have any desire to be one.  I am perfectly content being a pig.  And this, where I am now, is heaven. This mud is beautiful and warm, the trough is always full.  I need not do anything but wallow.  What a life! Besides,  I could never leave my wife or my children.  There can be nothing greater than the love I have for them and them for me.  No, go away Brahmaji.  I am a pig and very much content with that."

Brahmaji was so surprised by this response and did not know what to do.  He knew he had to get Indra back to Svargaloka as demanded by Brihaspati.  

"Well, I will have to take these things you are so attached to away.  He removed the mud and though Indra cried out, he still refused to be anything but a pig.  "I have my trough, my children, and my wife."

Brahmaji used his powers to remove the trough.Again Indra cried out in pain. 

"I still have my children and my wife."

One by one, Brahmaji used his powers to remove each piglet as Indra cried out in pain and grief. 

"I still have my wife!"

And poof...the sow was gone. 

Indra felt his heart breaking and the world he had come to love so much crumbling.

"Why are you being so cruel?  You have taken all I love away."

"You are a God Indra and you are wanted back home!" 

"I am no God.  I am in this lovely warm and soft pig flesh. I am a pig! Please leave me alone to be this pig with a broken, grieving heart!"

And with that Brahmaji ripped opened the carcass Indra was in and pulled him out .

Indra emerged from the pig's body, feeling lighter than he ever felt before, feeling powerful and strong, feeling much more than the mere contentment he ever  felt as a pig.  He felt bliss, love and joy.  He suddenly remembered who he was.  His life as a pig, he realized, was nothing more than a faint dream.

"And I thought I was that," he said pointing to the pig's body?  "And I thought this was heaven?" he went on...pointing to the pen.  He began to laugh and laugh and laugh.

The end.

Inspired by

Sri Swami Vivekananda (n.d.) The Complete Works of Vivekananda.  Kindle Edition, page 129

Suvyakta Narasimha Dasa/ Speaking Tree (Jan, 2011) When Indra Became a Hog. https://www.speakingtree.in/blog/when-indra-became-a-hog

 

Don't Make God as Small As You

 Your consciousness is the highest thing there is.  It is God.

Michael A. Singer

To a great being, consciousness is everything. God is consciousness or "conscious energy", what the yogis refer to as "chit shakti." Consciousness, then, is omnipresent (everywhere), omnipotent (all-powerful ), and omniscient (all-knowing). Singer reminds us, in the below linked podcast, that there is just as much consciousness/God in your little finger as there is in the farthest galaxy, and it is all connected, all one. 

Narrowing the Focus to the Dot

We are pretty high beings in these tiny, finite forms with these tiny, insignificant psyches that we call "me".   Yet, instead of recognizing and living in our omnipresent, omnipotent and  omniscient nature...we take this powerful consciousness and narrow it down,  focus it down on these tiny little specks we call "me"with all their self made problems and dramas. We, as "me", are tiny little dots on a speck of dust, here for such a short time. We, as awareness,  get pulled down from the higher state of being that we are and become  so lost in the drama, we identify with it, we become it and fail to see all else. We fail to see who we are.

Getting Lost in the Objects of Consciousness

Now, it is taught that there is only one consciousness (God) but a multitude of objects of consciousness. When we are lost in this "me", we focus more on the objects than we do on consciousness itself.  Heck, we are not even aware of consciousness, for the most part, or our true nature.  We see ourselves as that nurse, or doctor, or teacher, or plumber, or patient, or student, or daughter, or father etc  gathering  people, things and experiences that we hope will make us feel good inside, and cursing at or pushing away people, things, or experiences we fear will make us feel bad inside. We spend most of our time, then, clinging to or  resisting what life is unfolding in front of us.  It is like we are in a tug of war contest clinging to one end of the rope as we are pulled forward a few feet  and then as we are able to pull back a few feet...It is exhausting and a challenging way to live.  Yet, all our attention goes to this tiny little insignificant "person" holding onto the rope. All of our attention goes to this object of consciousness and its struggles to hang on. 

Making God as Small as Us

In the midst of our struggle we may look for some relief, some reprieve...a way to "get what we want so we can win this tug of war with life" .  We look for salvation from God.  What we want this omnipresent, omnipotent, and omniscient God to do is come down into the mud with us and give us what we want so we, as these little  dots on this speck of dust (earth in the infinite universe), feel okay inside. We want God to contract and shrink down into a limited human version we can relate.  We have this need, from this "me" focus, to humanize the holy relationship. God then becomes a concept, a belief, an idea that suits the psyche, not the soul, not the consciousness we actually are. We limit God and we limit ourselves when we do that. This just increases our sense of suffering as we get farther and farther away from who we actually are.

The Other Alternative: Moving Up

We don't have to do this.  We do not need to limit  God or consciousness by pulling It down into these problematic selves.  We can instead move up to where God is. We can  lift our gazes up and away from the person holding the tug a war rope.  We can begin  the  process of Objective  Observation...seeing ourselves as the Witness...observing the psyche and the form struggling in this game it doesn't have to struggle in. We can begin to observe how distracted we have been, looking at and resisting throughout  this drama. And though we will still feel the pull of it for some time, we can make the conscious choice to look away from "me", to look upward and behind us as we settle into the Seat of Conscious Awareness. 

We practice becoming awareness once again.  We practice relaxing instead of resisting what Life is unfolding in front of us.  We will still have internal reactions with what we deem as pleasant and unpleasant.  We will still feel a mixture of different emotions and have a mixture of different thoughts...but instead of feeling the urge to pull back and away as we tighten our grip...or feel ourselves  being pulled down into the mud because of them...we just watch them from a distance. We drop our end of the rope and the struggle eventually ends.

 Be willing to not know yourself  as you know yourself now, so you can know who you really are.

Then as we settle here, in awareness, we begin to make awareness itself our object of consciousness.  We become aware that we are aware. We become aware of Self as awareness.  If God is awareness then, we must be pieces of God? With our focus here, instead of on the  resistant "me", Singer tells us, we naturally get pulled upward away from the tug of war pit...away from our objects of consciousness. We move up to God. 

We merge back into the ocean of consciousness, back into the quantum field, back into the spaciousness and back into the omnipresent, omnipotent, and omniscient nature of who we really are. We live from here. We are free.

Nothing that you are doing here has any meaning, except for your liberation. Use everything to go to God.

All is well! 

Michael A. Singer/ Temple of the Universe. (December 10,2023) The Journey from Finite to Infinite https://tou.org/talks/

 

Happiness is an Inside Game. Stay Open

 All happiness that comes through the senses will, eventually, bring pain. All enjoyment will make us thirst for more, and that brings pain as its result...Vivekananda, pg 126

Happiness is an inside game! Making it an outside one brings pain. 

Even if what we are experiencing out there is pleasant, and we are opening up to experience a little happiness inside in response to it...the outer world person, event, or situation is not making us happy. The happiness is already inside us, in that flow of energy that is a part of who we really are.  Yet, if we believe something outside us is the cause of our happiness...we will soon be looking for "more" out there to keep the happiness going. This clinging and constant seeking will bring pain. Why? Because Life will never be able to meet all our expectations of how it should be to make or keep us happy.  It is an inside game.  Not an outside one! 

The alternative?

Simply stay open regardless if life is dropping pleasant things at your feet that meet your expectations or if it is bringing unpleasant things that don't match, leaving you uncomfortable inside. Just stay open to the energy flow inside.

Stay open to the natural flow of who you are. 

All is well! 

Michael A. Singer/ Temple of the Universe (December 7, 2023) Learning to Unblock Your Natural Energy Flow. https://tou.org/talks/

Swami Vivekananda (n.d.) The completer Works of Swami Vivekananda. Kindle Edition 

The Receptacle of Works

  Yogis regard the sum total of the impressions, good or evil, as pain bearing obstructions; they obstruct the way to freedom of the Soul. 

Vivekananda , page 126

What is the receptacle of works?  Vivekananda tells us that it is the sum total of our samskaras, and Singer tells us that is our psyches. It is all we have stored inside us from past experiences. We then  either open or close to an outside event or the possibility of one based on what we have learned about these experiences.  They become stimuli that leads to a conditioned response. 

Yoga, Singer reminds us,  is all about energy. Everything is energy...what we are is energy. The trouble is the energy is blocked becasue of this opening and closing that we do.  It is us, not Life, that is stripping us of the higher energy experience of living; it is not Life that is doing the closing and the opening.  We are shutting ourselves off from the natural flow of happiness, joy, creativity, peace, compassion, love and bliss which is already in us. 

We need to stay open, beyond the receptacle of works knowing we are that higher consciousness that is observing it...we are not it. We are SAt Chit Ananda: Eternal Conscious Bliss.

All is well

Michael A. Singer/ Temple of the Universe. (December 7, 2023) Learning to Unblock Your Natural Energy Flow. https://tou.org/talks/

The Complete Works of Swami Vivekananda (n.d.) Kindle Edition

Getting to the Root

 The Chitta-Vrittis, the mind -waves, which are gross, we can appreciate and feel; they can be more easily controlled, but what about the finer instincts? How can they be controlled? When I am angry, my whole mind becomes a huge wave of anger. I feel it, see it, handle it, can fight with it; but I shall not succeed perfectly in the fight until I can get down below to its causes....

...I thought, "I am going to be angry". Anger was one thing, and I was another; but when I became angry, I was anger.  These feelings have to be controlled in the germ, the root, in their fine forms, before even we have become conscious that they are acting on us.

With the vast majority of mankind the fine states of these passions are not even known- thestates in which they emerge from subconsciousness. When a bubble is rising from the bottom of the lake, we do not see it, nor even when it is nearly come to the surface; it is only when it bursts and makes a ripple that we know it is there...

until you can get hold of them before they become gross, there is no hope of conquering any passion perfectly. To control our passions we have to control them at their very roots; then alone shall we be able to burn out their very seeds....

As fried seeds thrown into the ground will never come up, so these passions will never arise.

Swami Vivekananda on  Patanjali's Yoga Sutra 9, Book  2

Allow Life to be as it is

 Every single moment is , "What happened next?"

Michael A. Singer

Life isn't anything we are doing.  It is simply being done. Allow, allow, allow. Even if we wanted to, we can not control any of it.  Honor, honor, honor the way things are.

All is well. 

Michael A. Singer/ Temple of the Universe ( December 5, 2023) Releasing Control and Honoring Life. https://tou.org/talks/

Learn to Merge Into That which is Just Aware

 There is only one consciousness.  It has always been there.  It has no age; it has no gender; it has no likes or dislikes; it has no preferences; it has no hopes; it has no dreams.  It is just aware.

Michael A. Singer

Whenever I listen to or read great lines of wisdom  that resonate within me as truth, I squibble down notes. (Been in school a little too long maybe, lol) As I was listening to Michael A. Singer in this podcast today (which may or may not be a recycled one), I wrote down the following lines.  Some of it is directly quoted, most of it is paraphrased.  

On What We really are

There is nothing solid inside of you...You are more ethereal than air...everything passes through...you are a clean being

Most of us see ourselves as the body and mind, as the this individual idea of "me" that we have built up over the years based on our learned experiences, our preferences, our likes and dislikes etc. We see tis me to be as "solid" and as "real" as the  body itself. We have come to believe over the years that something is only real if we can see it, touch it, smell it, hear it, taste it. Therefore we fail to consider the "essence" of something, the formless, invisible nature of it. Who we are at the deepest level is this invisible, formless essence. Our attachment to solidity often keeps us from experiencing the True Self.

This True Self is awareness

On the Psyche

Every moment is the sum of its learned experiences.  Your psyche is the sum of your learned experiences ( what you consider to be 'you or your life'). 

What we call "me" is just the psyche and it isn't who we are at the deepest level.  Yet, we spend so much time, as awareness, staring at it, we come to believe it is all we are. 

"If you touch it it will stick" 

So, as  our ethereal , spiritual, formless nature...all of life's experiences are meant to pass right through us. But they don't, do they?  Instead of simply observing, experiencing, and letting go we reach out our physical hands and our non-physical mental hands to touch certain things as they pass through.  The mind attempts to grab each thing and categorize it into certain storage chambers.  Those that we want repeated and those that we do not want repeated.  The only things that pass through, without us touching them, are the neutral events.  Everything we touch sticks...forming our likes and dislikes, our desires and aversions, our samskaras and therefore our psyches- this idea of a personalized me. This me leaves  very messy, clogged, and blocked insides.

"Anything you store inside destroys your life"

it stops you from "being here now"

We may erroneously believe it is just the so-called "negative" experiences we stored inside that makes our lives difficult, as we do everything we can to avoid  repeating them or reliving the painful emotions they generated.  But even when we grab the positive things our lives are effected because we will spend the rest of our lives clinging, or attempting to recapture and relive such experiences. It will be like chasing the dragon. Our focus and attention will consistently be on getting what we want...focusing on the future, reliving those memories of the past...we will not be fully here, in this moment.

Anything you push away stays inside of you....anything you resist persists

We also erroneously believe that when we avoid the unpleasant by pushing it away, we are somehow getting rid of it, when instead we are pulling it in and down. We are storing it inside.  We are clinging to it.  It does not go away, it persist inside us like  an infection brewing under the surface.  When you experience a painful loss and do not deal with it head on because your mind tells you you can't handle it ...the pain and the debris of that loss just gets buried inside you by your own hands.  It will linger and arise to the surface whenever it has the chance. It, like all experiences in Life, is meant to flow through but your resistance allows it to persist.

Psychology is based on the fact that you can't handle it. 

Psychology deals with the mind and mind's use of unhealthy defense mechanism of repression and suppression when we are dealing with reality. It, however, doesn't help us to accept reality. It helps to keep this self made  and unreal entity called the "psyche" functioning.  So its goal is to help unblock us...not to set us free, however, but to allow the psyche to flourish in a "normal" way.  Remember, just because something is normal, doesn't mean it is healthy.  To be heathy at the deepest level means to recognize the unwholesome nature of and let go of the psyche all together...which would mean going beyond the limitations of psychology. 

Is the world more negative than positive? No.  It is because you have a small list of what you call "positive", that you perceive more experiences as"negative."

It seems that we have so much more negative experiences and that we tend to store more negative stuff. That is only becasue we have very small, clearly defined lists of our expectations, what the world should be like to match our desires.  Does that mean the world is negative?  No. something isn't bad, wrong, shouldn't be just because we have defined it as such, just  because  it doesn't match what we want. The statistical probability that the world can match what we have on these lists is miniscule! The world isn't negative.  It is just not matching our criteria.

No one can think like you do because they have totally different experiences...

The same goes with other people.  They are not bad, wrong, or shouldn't be just because they do not match our expectations of what they should be like.  They have their own short lists remember?  What is the statistical probability that what is on their lists will match what is on ours.  The problem is not them.  The lists we make are the problem. Their learned experiences leading them to like or dislike, be attractive or repulsive,  do or say certain things are unique to them, just as your learned experiences that make up your psyche are unique to you.  The chances of the expectations and needs, and desires of us and someone else matching perfectly are very small.  So yeah, other people are going to disappoint us as long as we are clinging to these lists of expectations, demanding others be a certain way so as not to disrupt our samskaras inside. We, in turn, are going to disappoint others.

everything that is happening in front of you has a history and that history has nothing to do with you

The same with life events.  They are not personal. Life is not here to give us what we want . There were many causes leading to each effect that unfolds in front of us.  It isn't about us.

What is the probability that that moment is going to match what is going on in your head?

You are a very great being staring at something that is not so great,That doesn't mean you are not okay...you are just staring at something that is not....the psyche.

We are not the psyche.  We are the Observer of the psyche which is much greater than the psyche could ever be. This infinite, powerful awareness is who we are  and it is so often narrowly focusing  and concentrating  on something that is not okay- this disturbed mess we call "me". That doesn't mean we, at the deepest level, are affected by what we are staring at.  We are the light that is shining and just like the light is never contaminated by that which it is focusing on, we are not affected by that lower stuff we are paying attention to. 

On True Spirituality

True spirituality is not about attracting, manifesting or getting what you want...spirituality is the ability to learn to handle life.

Spirituality is not about making the world be something it isn't so it suits us.  It is about removing our attention from the  personal messes we created and looking upward. It is all about accepting the world exactly as it is and learning to handle it.  When we take this approach, we wake up each day to say, "Oh good morning world...I am back...I wonder what will happen today.  Can I handle the reality that is unfolding in front of me today?  Going to learn to...this is my practice.This is why I am here. "

Singer assures us when we take on this practice/sadhana we will go up.  We will stop looking down and start moving up energetically.  We will feel better and better, regardless of what is happening around us.  Understanding that we, as the light that is shining, are not contaminated by that which we are shining on, will keep us up. 

Like looking down at tumultuous water from a high bridge...every now and again the water gets so rough a few tiny splashes reach you and you realize, "Oh God, I use to be down there swimming around in that" Ram Dass (paraphrased)

We do not need to drown in these inner messes we created.  We can clean up the mess inside so there are no sticky blockages and so Life, in whatever form it unfolds in front of us, can flow through...so who we really are can flow through, up and out.

The Yogi merges back into the depth of infinite awareness like the drop of water merges back into the ocean 

We are not that which we have been erroneously shining on for so long.  We are the light that is doing the shining.  We are awareness. When we truly realize this we merge back into that awareness, like the drop of water which was  always the ocean merges back into that.  There is no  separate "me". 

You need to be willing to work your way out of yourself

The work we are to do here is to simply get out of our identification with this individual and personal self, this idea of "me", to realize  who we really are at the deepest level 

...let go of your resistance to dying to be reborn

We need to eventually do as Christ says, and die to be reborn.

All is well!

Michael Singer/Temple of the Universe (December 3, 2023) Shifting the Pull Downward to Upward. https://tou.org/talks/

Knowing Brahman, Knowing Everything

 Brahman is the truth, knowledge and infinity.

Satyam, Jnanam, Anantham Brahman

The ancient vedic teachings tell us that Brahman (God) is "the vast," that which  expands  or swells without limit. ( Sarvapriyananda).

Anantham

Anantham means, "without limit" or "infinite". What doe it mean to be without limit?

It means to be omnipresent, eternal, and nondual.

Say what crazy lady?

It means that it extends beyond the limit of space. There is no place where Brahman is not.  It is everywhere.  It extends beyond the limit of time. There is no time before Brahman existed and there will be no time after it existed.  It is not born and it does not die. It extends beyond the limit of object. There is nothing brahman is not in.  It is not separate or apart from anything. It is in everything.  

Brahman is right here, right now, in everything.

How can an object be Brahman if it is impermanent as much of this physical world is?  Our forms will die will they not?

Satyam

What is omnipresent, timeless, and not separate from anything is the existence of a thing...the being of a thing. Satyam is "pure existence"/truth /reality ...it is the "isness" of everything we see.  God/ Brahman is that isness. God is the ocean and all temporal objects are simply the waves.  We as human forms are manifesting existence for finite time...our bodies will die but the Ocean in us will continue to exist...we, who we are without this form,  will simply fall back into it. 

Reality exists beyond names and forms. We can look at a tree and say "tree"...that is just a name.  The tree is just a form. We can cut the tree down and chop it up for wood.  We may now call it "wood" but it is still that which the tree was.  We can then burn this wood in a fire and call it "fuel" but it is still that which the tree was.  We will see ashes in the firepit after the fire is out and may call it "ashes" but it is still that which the tree was.  The thing we called "tree" still exists though the names and forms changes....Even when all  matter is no longer visualized related to that object, what allowed the tree to be is still there though we can no longer experience it as such. It is this "isness"  that is "satyam", not the form or name.

Jnanam

It may seem that our knowledge can not be Brahman under the characteristics of spacelessness, timelessness, and nonduality because knowledge changes fast and all our experiences are so fleeting.  We learn something new every even minute, we may forget something every odd minute. What we have to remember is that all knowledge is stored in consciousness. It is only  the objects of consciousness that are constantly changing, appearing dual, appearing here or there, but consciousness itself is pure. It is the common backdrop of all knowledge. It is not limited by space, time or duality.  Hmm!

This is where Sat Chit Ananda comes into play.  The  Eternal Conscious Bliss of existence. It is the light within our hearts that allows us to experience  these lives.

 Brahman  is the Truth, Knowledge, and Infinity. He who knows It as existing in the cave of the heart in the  transcendent akasha, realizes all his desires along with omniscient Brahman. (Taittiriya Upanishad)

All is well. 

The Vedic Verse (November, 2023) Mind Blowing Idea that proves God is Within You/Swami SarvaPriyananda .https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cKVg3Sb1_2k

Taittiriya Upanishads/Vedanta  Students. (n.d.) https://vedantastudents.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/10/05-Taittriya-Upanishad-Summary.pdf

Inspired?

 

When you are inspired by some great purpose, some extraordinary project, all your thoughts break their bonds. Your mind transcends limitations, your consciousness expands in every direction, and you find yourself in a new, great, and wonderful world. 

Patanjali

In the below linked podcast, Michael Singer addressed the idea of inspiration and love being something innate within us as opposed to being something we find out there. 

Inspiration is this flow of spirit, this flow of shakti that rushes up inside of you and you cant do anything but do as it pulls you to do. Spontaneous being...can't be controlled. (somewhat paraphrased)

So, this wonderful feeling of inspiration is already in us.  We can, in fact, be inspired every single moment by every single thing.  

Then why aren't we?  Why are so many of us searching desperately out there for things or other beings that we assume will fill us with inspiration and love?  Singer tells us, that we are so busy staring at the mess our psyches have made, we have come to believe we are them , that we are nothing more than the sum of our learned experiences. We have therefore come to believe that inspiration and love are conditional, based on what happens "out there."

We are not our psyches.  We are the Observer of these psyches.  Just as the light that shines on a broken object is not broken, either are we.   We are just so busy  staring at  broken mess that  needs to be fixed, we cannot see who we really are. We do not tap into this natural flow of inspiration, love, peace and bliss that is flowing within us.   If we could stop staring at what is broken, fall back into the spaciousness of who we are, then we would be truly inspired. 

Inspiration is unconditional.  It is something we are, not something we find. 

I come here everyday pulled by this flow of inspiration inside me.  I really couldn't stop it if I wanted to.  I can see that readers are down again, next to zero and still I come.  I am inspired to help in some way and though coming here makes no sense whatsoever to my rational mind, here I am. I can't wait for conditions to change, for there to be  a great number of readers or for the conditions out there to match what my psyche wants.  Inspiration sees all that as totally insignificant. So, I come here and do what I do. My thoughts are unblocking, my mind is transcending limitations, my consciousness is expanding, and the world , I see from here, is an amazing and wonderful place.  I want to share what I see to whomever, whenever. Hmm! 

All is well in my world.

Michael A. Singer/ Temple of the Universe ( November 30, 2023) Inspiration: Being It Vs Finding It.https://tou.org/talks/

The SImplicity of True Wisdom

I am without form, without limit, I am beyond space, beyond time.  I am in everything; everything is in me.  I am the bliss of the universe. Everywhere I am. I am sat chit ananda, absolute experience, absolute knowledge, absolute bliss....tat taum aussi.  I am that. I am that. 

Swami Ram Kir

Listened to this podcast today and Ram Dass shared these words from the Indian mystic above.  They are important words I think but probably very challenging for many of us in the west to accept as our reality.  We are so addicted to our little minds and all the dramas of our personal worlds that we fail to see who we truly are at the deepest level. We are so addicted to the form we obsessively put our attention on, that we fail to see the formless nature of who we are. We do not fully realize this truth: "I see my experiences as projections of my own attachments."

We need to remember that we are spirits on earth having the odd human experience, not humans who have the odd spiritual one. We need to remember the "being" in Human Being!

I love this prayer or intention, that Ram Dass shared as well:

May your every act in life, down to your very breath, be a vehicle for bringing matter into spirit and spirit into matter. May you become a transformation so you can live in the world but not of the world, so you are both the word and the silence, you are the form and the formless, with every breath.

Al is well.

Baba Ram Dass (1980) The Circle/Ram Dass Full Lecture. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jx2jEpDMcGk&t=1s

The Tiny Fish bowl of your mind

Eternal ecstasy?  When you stop staring at you, that is what is there.

Michael Singer

I reminded some one last evening, "You are greater than that mind that convinces you that you can only be okay if you  get what you want." 

I wanted them to see that the reason they didn't feel healthy  is because they were very narrowly focusing on something that wasn't healthy. That they were not it and what they really were could not be damaged by it.  Didn't go over well but that was my argument before I let go and released the choices they were making. 

Like most of us, this person's consciousness was focusing on what was broken and destructive rather than on what was beyond that. Why? Because they couldn't get what they thought they wanted. It was hard to convince them that beyond this mind with its desires and aversions, its drama and mess was pure peace and happiness.  After the conversation, I had to go to great effort to remind myself. Sigh! I too had closed and found myself looking down at what was not okay. I have to redirect my focus back on that which cannot be touched by this narrow focus. 

All is well.

Michael A. Singer/Temple of the Universe ( November 27, 2023) A Lot to Be Thankful For. https://tou.org/talks/

Enough

 To do the useful thing, to say the courageous thing,to contemplate the beautiful thing: that is enough for one man's life.

T.S. Eliot

Back to Understanding Collective Karma

 As far as the laws of existence are concerned, there is no good and no bad, no crime and punishment.  It is just for every action there is a consequence.

Sadhguru

This is all Karma is people: a consequence for action, an effect from a cause.The effect or consequence can be personal or collective. 

Personal: Let's say, for example,we think bad thoughts about a certain person because of their race or gender, we voice those thoughts, (or worse...act on them) and then we reap the consequences of those thoughts and words. We receive some form of social or legal sanction.  Why?  Because we are bad and needing to be punished?  No,  because we are "off the mark" when aiming for our target ( reestablishing ourselves in the Seat of Self...whether we know that is what we are aiming for  or not, that is the Soul's goal....and such distinct mental separation from others takes us way off course). What we get back from society, what we get back from life as  a consequence for our action, is to simply help us learn and get back on course.  If there were no consequences we would get farther and farther away from the mission agenda of taking the Soul where it is here to go. We need karma!

Karma can be personal, as above, or it can be collective. 

So, a question was asked to Sadhguru and recorded in the last chapter of the book. 

When I read a news report  about a little girl being raped, for example, can I really say she deserved it because it is her karma?

Sadhguru answers by saying it isn't her karma, it is ours.

If all of us live without any humanity in our hearts for all the atrocities going on around us, that is our karma. We get the society we deserve. So don't think of it as her karma. Think of it as your own.  Inaction is also  karma. page 206

 Every little girl in society, not just the ones we know and love, are deserving of our protection.  We are collectively responsible for suffering in our community when we do not  at least try to make a difference. We need to do whatever we can to protect every little girl in our society, every sentient being!  We need to take responsibility for the collective suffering around us. If we are observing it...it is a part of our karma. We can recognize it as such and take on wholesome action!  Not that we can change all the would be consequences and protect everyone but we can have in our thoughts, words, and actions the desire for the well being of all. 

If there is collective will, we can bring many things to some sense of order. With concerted and participatory action, much can be changed. But if you attribute all this to divine will, things will go on endlessly in the same way. page 206

...if you see yourself as the creator of your karma, it will shape the way you think, feel, and act. And you now realize, you have the power to affect the lives of many, many others around you.  page 207

But remember this: for every thought that you generate, there is a consequence. Don't ever try to fix the consequence. The consequence will happen anyway. It is not something you can control. But the process is your doing.  If you manage the process well, the consequence will be good.  page 207

So we cannot control the consequences of karma but we can control the process.  Let's ensure our thoughts, words, and actions are motivated by a desire for the well being of all. Let's manage the process well. 

All is well.  

Sadhguru ( 2021) Karma: A Yogi's Guide to Crafting Your Destiny. New York: Harmony

Samma Ditthi: Right Understanding

"When I stop screwing myself up, things will be fine," and that is an absolute truth. 

Michael A. Singer

Samma Ditthi, Right Understanding or Right View, is the first "Right" in the Eightfold Path taught by the Buddha to assist us through suffering. Yes, Noble Truths tell us, there is suffering, a cause for suffering, a way through suffering, and the Eightfold Path is the way. Such amazing wisdom!

Right understanding. according to Michael Singer, is simply recognizing that we are in a sense responsible for our suffering.  If we are not okay inside it is because we are holding on to something that does not serve us. The yogi's refer to these stored things as "samskaras". We are also using a conditioned methodology for "feeling better" that does not work in the long run.  We are grasping, clinging and chasing things from the outside world that we erroneously believe will make us feel better inside and we push out the stuff  from the outside world that makes us feel worse inside. (Pushing away is equivalent to pushing down adding to our stored stuff). 

Wrong View

Our mixed up understanding is that the outside world is responsible for how we feel inside. So we spend our time chasing and clinging  and pushing away. Our methodology for happiness, however, does not work and will cause more disturbance and unhappiness inside us and outside us in the long run.  When we approach Life and suffering like this we end up preferring certain outside experiences, expecting them,  and needing it all to be a certain way and that isn't how Life works.  Life is just doing what Life does and we have this wonderful opportunity to observe it, experience it, and participate fully in it, which we cannot do if we are resisting it. When we resist anything in Life we close our hearts and operate from closed hearts and resistant minds. Singer reminds us that there are almost 8 billion people on the planet and if they are all operating from this "wrong understanding" no wonder why there is so much individual and collective suffering in the world today. We are not understanding correctly!

Right understanding takes us inside to the "root of suffering" so we view it and understand it enough to get through it. With Right Understanding we come to see that happiness is  an inside game and that we are responsible for any mess we might have inside. Life is not here to please us but we can be pleased when we learn to open up to whatever unfolds in front of us...be it ten thousand joys or ten thousand sorrows.  Keeping our hearts open is the goal, no matter what.  We need to understand that is the only thing that works!!That is why Right Understanding is the most crucial step to ending suffering and opening ourselves up to the peace and joy we can be experiencing instead.

Stop screwing yourself up and you will find that the whole world is beautiful...not perfect...but beautiful!

All is well!

 Michael A. Singer/ Temple of the Universe ( November 26, 2023) Taking Charge of Your Inner State. https://tou.org/talks/

Understanding the Yoga Sutras a Bit Better: Practice and Non-Attachment

The moment you understand yourself as the True Self, you find such peace and bliss that the impressions of the petty enjoyments you experienced before  become as ordinary specks of light in front of a brilliant sun. You lose all interest in them permanently. That is the highest non-attachment.

Swami Satchidananda, page 28

As Patanjali's second sutra dictates:

The restraint of the modification of the mind-stuff is Yoga. Satchidananda, page 3

Yoga is restraining the mind-stuff (Chitta) from taking various forms (Vrittis). Vivekananda, page 103-104

Chitta is the various process in the "mind-stuff"...the mental modifications. It is the infinite storehouse of force in nature. We can call it "the stuff of the mind". Vrittis are the waves of thought, the "whirlpools",  in the Chitta. Thoughts are a force, as is gravitation and repulsion. 

Chitta takes hold of some [what the senses pick up], absorbs it and sends it out as thought.page 104

...the mind is not intelligent; yet it appears intelligent. Why? Because the intelligent soul is behind it. You are only the sentient being; mind is only the instrument through which you catch the external world. page 105

The real man[Self/ soul/Purisha?]is behind the mind; the mind is the instrument in his hands; it is his intelligence that is percolating through the mind.

It is only when you stand behind the mind that it becomes intelligent. When man gives it up, it falls to pieces and is nothing. Thus you understand what is meant by Chitta. It is the mind stuff, and Vrittis are the waves and ripples rising in it when external causes impinge on it. These Vrittis are our universe. page 105

We cannot see the bottom of the lake when its surface is covered in ripples or if it is muddy and agitated all the time. 

If it is clear, and there are no waves, we shall see the bottom. The bottom of the lake is our own true Self; the lake is the Chitta and the waves the Vrittis.

Then there is the state called Sattva, serenity, calmness, in which the waves cease, and the water of the mind-lake becomes clear.  It is not inactive, but rather intensely active. It is the greatest manifestation of power to be calm. ...The calm man is the one who has control over the mind waves. Activity is the manifestation of inferior strength, calmness, of the superior. page 105

The Chitta is always trying to get back to its natural pure state, but the [sense?] organs draw it out. To restrain it, to check this outward tendency, and to start it on the return journey to the essence of intelligence is the first step in yoga, because only in this way can the Chitta get into its proper course.  page 105

On the Third Sutra of Patanjali

Then the Seer (Self) abides in Its own nature. (Satchidananda, page 6)

At the time(the time of concentration) the seer( Purusha) rests in his own(unmodified) state. 106

As soon as the waves have stopped, and the lake has become quiet, we see its bottom. So with the mind; when it is calm, we see what our own nature is; we do not mix ourselves but remain our own selves

On the Forth Sutra

At other times[the Self appears to] assume the form of the mental modifications. Satchidananda, pg 7

At other times (other than that of concentration) the seer is identified with the modifications. page 106

On the 11th Sutra

When a mental modification of an object previously experienced and not forgotten comes back to consciousness, that is memory. Satchidananda, page 17

Memory is when the (Vrittis of) perceived objects do not slip away (and through impressions come back to consciousness) page 108

Of course, Patanjali is introducing us to Samskaras with this sutra.

On the 12th Sutra

These mental modifications are restrained by practice and non-attachment. Satchidananda, page 18

Their control is by practice and non-attachment,page 108

Yoga is a practice of letting go of these tendencies, these habits.

 ...Each action is like the pulsations quivering over the surface of the lake. The vibration dies out, and what is left? The Samskaras, the impressions. When a large number of these impressions are left on the mind, they coalesce and become a habit. (page 108)

...everything we are is the result of habit.[our psyches?] That gives us consolation, because, if it[this idea of self we adhere to?] is only habit, we can make or unmake it anytime. page 108

The Samskaras are left by these vibrations passing out of our mind, each one of them leaving its result. Our character is the sum total of these marks, and according as some particular wave prevails one takes that tone. If good prevails, one becomes good; if wickedness prevails, one becomes wicked. If joyfulness prevails, one becomes happy. page 108

The only remedy for bad habits is counter habits; all the bad habits that have left their impressions are to be controlled with good habits. ..Go on doing good, thinking holy thoughts continuously; that is the only way to suppress base impressions. page 108

I know Vivekananda uses the big, bad, no-no word 'suppress' here but I think he simply means we need to water the wholesome seeds in our store consciousness so there are less unwholesome weeds growing up into our conscious mind and therefore into our "character".

On the 16th Sutra

When there is non-thirst  for even the gunas (constituents of Nature) due to the realization of the Purusa (True Self), that is supreme non-attachment. Satchidananda, page 27

That is extreme non-attachment which gives up even the qualities, and comes from the knowledge of (the real nature of) the Purusha. page 109

According to Yoga philosophy, the whole of nature consists of three qualities of nature called Tamas, another Rajas, and the third Sattva. These three qualities manifest themselves in the physical world as darkness or inactivity, attraction or repulsion, and equilibrium of the two. page 109

...the Self of man is beyond all these, beyond nature. It is effulgent, pure, and perfect. Whatever of intelligence we see in nature is but the reflection of Self upon nature. Nature itself is insentient. page 109.

I question this statement a bit.  In my mind, I see nature as intelligent and sentient?? I think nature here, however, may refer to "form".

...the word nature also includes the mind; mind is in nature; thought is in nature; from thought, down to the grossest of matter, everything is in nature, the manifestation of nature.This nature has covered the Self of man, and when nature takes away the covering, the self appears in its own glory. page 109

Wow! So much learning I felt compelled to share for reasons I may never understand completely :) This is where I left off in the Vivekananda book I am reading.  Will be back with more of his shared teachings as I get further along.

All is well. 

Swami Satchidananda (2011) The Yoga Sutras of Patanjali. Yogieville, Virginia: Integral Yoga Publications

Swami Vivekananda, (1976 revised?)The Complete Works of Swami Vivekananda (1.3.9), Kindle Edition

The Work We Need to Do

 If you are focusing on anything other than the Self, you are not focusing on God, you are focusing on "you".

Michael A. Singer

What do we do, as part of our practice, when we are not meditating?

A lot.  Meditation is only one limb of Patanjali's Raja Yoga. And though it offers a wonderful way of connecting to body, breath, moment and the higher Self...there is so much other work to be done in order to get to the point where we can maintain the Seat of the Self. 

Reading Vivekananda and he taught basically the same thing shared by Singer in the below linked podcast. Both are addressing something called "Mahayoga"...in which the Yogi finds himself and the whole universe as God.  This is the highest of all yogas.  Vivekananda

Of course, that is not what we may consciously set out to do.  We may simply be looking for a better alternative to approaching life than the way we have been living, attempting to manipulate the world outside so "little me" feels okay inside. We may decide to "go deeper" and going deeper will ultimately take us to God. 

The eight limbs of yoga derived by Patanjali consist of:

Yama: living a life of non-injury, truthfulness, non-covetousness, chastity, not receiving anything from another

Niyama: Regular habits and observances in austerity, study, contentment, purity, worship (and possibly fasting on occasion, purifying and keeping the body clean, repeating mantras, etc,.

Asana: postures done in Hatha Yoga

Pranayama: control of the vital force in one's own body through controlled breathing exercises

Pratyahara: Bringing the sense organs under the control of the will so we are less distracted and can calmly sit still for a bit( what most of us in the West would consider our meditation practice) 

Dharna: focusing our concentration on one thing like the breath, a candle flame or the heart chakra for example...we coach the mind away from distracting thoughts ( we do not try to stop thinking we just encourage our consciousness to be distracted by something else for a period of time) Again, we may consider this meditation in the west when actually it is only a pre-step, like pratyahara, to prepare for meditation.  Here there may be many vibratory waves coming up that we can focus on and it may seem like all other waves ( like thoughts) are receding

Dhyana: is the step in Patanjali's Sutras where we actually meditate. This is when everything comes together into a state of non duality. The multiple waves merge into One. 

Samadhi: When the whole of the mind has become one wave, one formedness it is called Samadhi.(Vivekananda)

If the mind can be fixed on its center for twelve seconds it will be Dharana, twelve such Dharanas and it will be a Dhyana, and twelve such Dhyanas will be a Samdhi. Vivekananda, page 100

So though we think we believe we are practicing and achieving Dhyana during our own understanding of meditation, most of are not and even if we are, most of these steps take place in those hours when we are not on the cushion or the mat. , 

The most important thing we can do, according to Singer, is purify and relax into life.  Instead of basing our approach towards life on preventing a disturbance inside because of samskara triggering...we get rid of the samskaras. We allow them to come up,,,we allow them to go.  Relaxing and letting go  are the most important actions to take part in in our sadhana.  Once the blockages are removed Sat Chit Ananda will flow through freely and we will once again, know who we are.  

All is well. 

Michael A. Singer/  Temple of the Universe ( November 24) What to do When You Are Not Meditating. https://tou.org/talks/

The Complete Works of Vivekananda, Kindle edition

Windows to the Soul

 Windows to the Soul

I look into your eyes

and I see my own.

The shape differs.

I have more crinkles in the corner;

you have more of a slant.

The irises are a different shade of blue

yet ...

there I am.

My undefined and vague physicality

is reflected in the pupils

that you call your own.

I want to look away

...but I don't.

The more I force myself to look,

the more I see

what I thought was me

intertwined in the fibers and cells

of your form,

swimming in the pools of your being,

settling into the home

where I have always been.

Body lines blur;

borders disappear;

and what once separated us

is gone.

I am in you

and you

my dear friend

are in me.

We are one.

 

Dale-Lyn 2017

I thought of this poem I wrote years ago when I listened to Ram Dass speak today. 

All is well!

Levels of Perceiving Who We Are

 Our journey is about being more deeply involved in life, yet less attached to it.

Ram Dass

Sometimes I look at what I call " my life" and wonder what it is all about; why it was the way it was with all its challenges up to this point; why things turn out the way they do; why it is the way it is now.  I wonder who I am and why I am here. You know?  I have always had this questioning in the back of my mind since I could remember and it is that questioning that has led me here to this path I seem to be on now, to the practice that has become more important than anything else to me.  It has led me to this blog, this moment, and to doing what I am doing now...writing about it. 

Not this Body/ Not this Mind 

I do a meditation every morning and part of that meditation is reminding myself that I am not this body and not this mind ( this psyche, this self concept, these feelings, thoughts and beliefs).  I have progressed  far enough to know that much anyway. I somehow see and understand what Ram Dass discovered and taught :

I am going through a set of experiences which is called "living life" and these experiences have a certain function . These experiences if used consciously and intentionally by me are vehicles through which I can awaken to who I am in truth.

This path of awakening to truth is not about advancing  farther on the horizontal line of existence ...not at all.  It is about transecting that line and going vertically deeper. It is all about going deeper with our perceptions.

The Levels of Perception

Ram Dass brilliantly shows how we advance deeper into truth , into seeing and understanding who we are at the deepest level by understanding what we see when we look at other humans through six levels of perception. 

First level of perception: On this superficial level we look at another human being and see only the separate physical body (man, woman, old, young,  fat, pretty etc)

Second level of perception: Here we step deeper into seeing beyond form to the psychology in another human being or self. Many ppl live on this level and are totally preoccupied with their own psychology, mental illnesses, emotions, anxieties and  fears, thoughts and beliefs etc .  They tend to see this psychology or psyche as the "real me" and the body as just the carrier of that.

Third Level of perception: Here Ram Dass describes the astral level...where  we go beyond body and mind to see what the other is in terms of astrology. ( Of course, this lecture was in the late sixties where astrology was a big part of the new emerging culture. It is also a big part, or was, of Indian tradition.  I don't understand it enough to comment.)

Forth level of perception: At this level we go deeper beyond body, psyche, astral sign, to see the being looking back at us. We see another being exactly like us at this level.  We see the "soul". Less focused is based on individuality and more on similarity. We see that:  All the individual differences is the stuff in which this being is encased....

Fifth level of perception: What we see, at this level of depth, when we look into someone else's eyes we see the One Self: see yourself looking at yourself looking at yourself. Ram Dass goes on to say we can see that, There is one awareness in a multiplicity of form.

Sixth and deepest level of perception, : Is what Buddhists call the void or "shunyata" 

I disappear and you disappear...and we are dealing with what the Buddhist call "void"or in the New Testament "before the word"... before the vibratory uniqueness...or why God is unable to be spelled in the Hebrew religion.  It is unspeakable, unknowable, unseeable, ...and inconceivable...

Who are you?

So the question remains, "Who are you?  Who am I?" To understand taht answer we need to go beyond surface identity. This is what ram Dass has to say about it:

....the deeper we go the more profound the identity

I am the void who manifests as the one who becomes the many who has a unique set of factors to work out through a unique astral, psychological, and physical body.

Understanding who we truly are means looking into two concepts we may have been conditioned to reject or be overly identified with. 

Reincarnation and Karma?

I have taken a body to do certain work and when I am finished that work I will drop that body

He, of course, includes two ideations which are still often  viewed as "woo-woo"in the west: reincarnation and karma. They are considered to be "taboo" subjects for many Christians.  We have to remember though, that they were not always taboo. The teachings on reincarnation and karma have been removed from the bible and Christian teachings roughly between  the first council of Nicaea  in 325 AD and the second council of Nicea in 787 AD because they didn't make the church a workable situation. Belief in reincarnation and karma would make every human being their own priest, giving them a direct relationship with God.  The church did not want that. 

Time? 

As long as we are dealing with the body, with your personality, with your soul we are dealing in time. Time passes, things change...but in the One...there is no time anymore.  Time is relative...now we are dealing with a place, where you know yourself as taht, you just are....you are going nowhere and you are coming from nowhere. 

your going and coming is nowhere but where you are...as taught by zen masters

The question then arises, what would life be like if we perceived it at the deepest level of our being? 

Imagine what it would be like to see your life as so functional to your awakening and your death equally so the whole business becomes merely a process of growth, and awakening, and opening and deepening and clearing, and shifting channels. There is no problem about transitioning...no problem with holding on out of fear.  It is just opening

Wow ! That was some pretty profound teaching for one day...at least it was for me. What do you think? 

All is well.

Ram Dass/ After Skool (Sept 27, 2021) The Freedom of Being Nobody-Ram Dass. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nWJXdr0mQ0s&t=363s

A clean and tidy inner state is more important than the outer one

 There is nothing more important than your inner state of consciousness... [When we get upset about something out there] it is a reminder then, that there was a confusion about importance, what matters and what is secondary and what is primary. Secondary is the external situation. Primary is your state of consciousness that you bring to it. 

Eckhart Tolle

My goal has always been peace in lieu of suffering.  I have committed to keeping my inner state serene over creating a semblance of order in my external state.  It shows.  I looked around my house yesterday as I was watching my grandson.  I was exhausted from the morning, a lot of stair climbing, and before I received my grandson so my daughter, who dropped a 300 lb mulcher on her foot at work ( missing the steel toe) could do the 11 hour wait in emergency, I was all about just meditating, and revamping with  the evenings yoga class etc...my inner work.  Things changed, of course, which is perfectly okay but I realized that I choose automatically to put my remaining  energy  to peace and being fully present (especially when I am with the grandchildren) rather than caring what the house looks like.  It was disastrous.  There were toys from one end of it to the other ( fur balls and dust bunnies as well), dishes in the sink, pet dishes scattered from one end of er to the other, laundry piled up in the washroom, and like always when I feel this way, I shut down to deal with the task at hand...being present fully for my grandson and constantly observing and taming my mind before it gets too crazy.  That is a full time job. lol. Well the Xray revealed that there was no fracture but by the look of it, she will not be on it for a while. No grandson this Thursday, so maybe I will have to clean the house from top to bottom after all. yuck!  I would rather choose peace lol.

All is well.

"This is not worth losing my peace over."

 I am the prince of perpetual peace playing in a drama of sad and happy dreams on a stage of eternity.

Yogananda

Mantra of the day (of every day): "This is not worth losing my peace over."

All is well! 

Michael A. Singer/ Temple of the Universe ( November 20, 2023) Choosing Peace. https://tou.org/talks/

Sleepy November

 Peering from some high window, at the gold of November sunset and feeling if it has to become night, this is a beautiful way.

e.e. cummings

 I don't know what to write about today. It feels like there was so much exposure lately.  I feel the urge to pull back a bit maybe and just breathe.  I like to observe nature when I breathe in. 

Lovely cool, crisp November day out there. I am looking out the window  and seeing the signs of a changing season. Winter is coming. So many changes.  Trees are naked. The earth covered in heavy frost and dusty wisps of snow in the morning.  Cars have to be started and run for a while before anyone is brave enough to crawl in them. 

I find myself wondering where my crows went.  I have not seen them in days. ( "My" crows lol...as if they are "mine"). Just meant the murder of  crows I have been feeding all summer.  I named them all and got to the point where they would come when I called them.  I could get pretty close to them as well and they would look down at me as I spoke to them.  So cool :)  I do hope they are okay. Now that food source is limited, I expected them around more.  Maybe they flew south to a warmer area.  I still put the feed out for them but my dogs tend to eat it, just for spite, I am sure.  They are very territorial and do not like me feeding or talking to  other animals. :) 

Speaking of feeding other animals, "my" visiting bear ( oh another claim to that which I  can never claim, lol)...is likely preparing for hibernation. Don't notice his tracks, or scat in the yard or on the trail I walk anymore. Have not heard or seen him outside at night in quite a while.  

The spiders on the troughs outside my windows...and there are many ( I cannot kill them or disturb their webs despite how unappealing...or scary ( they are rather large) their presence  may look)...I discovered are in something called "diapause" right now, which is just a very sleepy metabolic  state meant to help them survive the harsh Canadian winter.  They can still wake up on warm days  to eat.  I did scatter some of their prey covered webs that were standing out because of frost. They were no longer needed and  were creating more of a Halloween scene, then a Christmas one lol...I did my best not to harm the actual spiders.  

Most animals are gone.  No more robin song :( , but there are the Chickadees to listen to and the Jays, whose squawking over the acorns, have diminished a lot in the last few weeks. The deer are also visiting. Glad to see that the left over apples which were so, so abundant on my trees this year (an inner thankyou to the person who gifted those trees to me...they were absolutely lovely every year in their beauty and their harvest) are being put to good use. 

Hmmm! This really is a lovely time of year.  The light is amazing...cloud cover is usually darker but the light beneath that shines through is silvery and almost ethereal in its radiance.  November, though it seems like such a sad month, is simply just a sleepy one...yawning and stretching before the world goes to bed.  

The world is such an amazing thing to observe, no matter what season it is. Don't you think?

  

All is well!

Relaxing into the "Little Stupid Things" of Ego

 Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.

Rumi

I have a big ego still.  I am fully aware of it.  Though it often still  pulls me into its dramas and I get all caught up and tangled up in its issues...I do know, at some deep level, that I am not my ego.  I can pull myself back, more and more, from this ever demanding and compelling object of consciousness and simply observe it.  

Most of the stuff I write here is just observation of this ego at play. If I am observing it, as in recording its antics, I am not it.  Am I?  I go from being the object of consciousness (or assuming I am that) to being the Objective Observer of an overactive ego. I share my observations in hope that you will observe your own ego at play and therefore disidentify from it. And I share because it helps me to disentangle myself from this "problematic me" so I can, more and more, become aware of the consciousness that is observing, the consciousness that I am. 

You are a beautiful being staring at something that is not beautiful

As Singer tells us in the below linked podcast, in our sadhana/spiritual practice, we are not to put our energy into getting rid of the ego. When we do that we simply create another ego with another name.  We develop a spiritual ego (and I am often guilty of doing that).  Our goal is to simply be aware of ego's presence in our lives and not be disturbed by it.  Watch it, feel it, experience it without getting lost in it, without being disturbed by it. We maintain the Seat of Observer and ego is just one of the many things this Observer observes. 

The practice is all about being comfortable in this role of Observer of ego. So when ego acts up, as its nature, we observe and feel the disturbance. We recognize ego and what it is doing. We notice the way we feel inside...maybe fear, anxiety, shame and then we relax into this experience.  We do not expect ego to relax...that is not its nature.  Remember ego  is simply  the accumulation of all the stuff you stored inside: your likes and dislikes, your attractions and aversions...your strong emotions.  Often the ego was built on pain. If that stuff was stored in pain, it comes up in pain. We then notice the anxiety, the shame, the fear, the anger etc should it arise. We do not expect or demand that these emotions be anything but what they are either.  We simply recognize them, observe and allow them to be what they are. We can, if we are so inclined investigate further into them but we do not have to until we are more comfortable with watching ego.  We try to be  kind...or at least neutral... in our response to what we are observing; detached from that which we are observing...knowing it isn't who we really are. If I am observing it, it isn't me.  I am the "I am " observing. 

Singer reminds us in our investigation of  ego to begin slowly.  We can start with those things that are closer to the surface.  When I awoke today, ironically, I found myself dealing with a minor ego thing and doing my best to relax into it.  I recalled, for some odd reason-not sure why it popped into me head...a photography book I self published years ago for gifts.  In the introduction of the book I made a glaring geography error.  Because the photos I had taken were all about the river I grew up on I mistakenly said this river flowed into the Bay of Fundy, when in reality it flows into the Northumberland Strait (something I actually knew so well...aha ego just  stepped in there to tell you that I was someone who knew lol).  My "academic" ego, the ego that likes to be seen as smart was really bothered by that mistake but because I had already handed out the gifts there was no way of correcting it.  My ego led me to feel shame and embarrassment. In fact, whenever I think of that book, to this day,  I feel my face flushing and the tightness in the belly.  I automatically try to suppress the experience of recall back down into the recesses of my subconscious.  

And it is truly such a little stupid thing!!

Today, when it came up, I remembered Singer's words about relaxing into ego and its emotions (not knowing that that would be today's podcast topic, as well). I observed the ego activation, the shame and embarrassment.  I recognized ego in it all and I reminded myself I wasn't that academic that wanted to be seen as smart...that was just ego. I was the Observer of this ego in action. I  noticed but said "no" to that strong temptation to suppress. I breathed and relaxed my body as much as possible.    I sat with the experience as I recalled the book and the mistake. I felt the feelings in my body.  I recognized and allowed it all as I observed. The body relaxed, the feelings passed through, and it was over. I can think about that book now and the experience I have is so much better. (Though I know I would still feel embarrassed if someone mentioned the mistake to me etc...ego, I know is not gone lol) .  Anyway , this relaxing into what is works. 

An ignored guest quickly leaves

Sigh, we are not the ego. We are Consciousness and from there, simply Observers of the "little stupid things" ego does. Ego, is probably going to be sticking around for a long time for most of us, at least. We can learn to be comfortable observing it.

All is well. 

Michael A. Singer/ Temple of the Universe ( November 19, 2023) Understanding Ego: Everybody Has One. https://tou.org/talks/

"Negating Nagging Needs"

 

Everything changes when you change.

Michael A. Singer

In this great talk Singer once again explains that in order to change the world, we  simple change ourselves. All this suffering we feel and observe is not because of anything that is happening out there...it is because of our inner reaction to what is happening out there.  This event (whatever it may be) that shows up in this moment...really has nothing to do with us. It is simply happening for a myriad of different reasons, with a million different causes and effects. Yet, if it isn't the way we assume it should be, if it doesn't meet our expectations, doesn't relieve some of our own inner turmoil, and if it, in fact, stirs up our inner turmoil...we actively resist the outside event and label it as "bad, wrong, or shouldn't be". We push it, and the emotional energy that surrounds it, away which is equivalent to pushing it down into the recesses of our minds and hearts to be triggered again and again by outside things. This creates a blockage or samskara and the Shakti ...the free flowing innate and powerful energy of peace, love, joy and bliss, that is intended to flow through us, gets blocked or tangled up in these blockages on its way through us.  That creates disturbance and emotional energy that we judge as positive or negative. That creates our neediness. 

It is not the event...it is whether it opens you or closes you and that is up to you...if it closes you feel terrible...if it opens you you feel great cuz Shakti is able to flow around the blockage

We either  open or close in reaction to a trigger and a samskara activation.  That opening and closing is something we do. Therefore, it is something we have the power to change.  We cannot change the world around us to make it suit our inner worlds, no matter how much we try, but we can change our inner worlds so we are no longer so easily triggered and disturbed by the world around us as it does what it does. We can become joyful, and loving unconditionally by staying open. We can get rid of those blockages that prevent us from experiencing the free flow of Shakti through us. We can learn to relax and release into what is without preferring or wanting it to be different than what it is. 

"Negating nagging needs",  is what yoga is all about.

All is well in my world. 

Michael A. Singer/ Temple of the Universe ( November 17, 2023) Understanding the Root of Need. https://tou.org/talks/