Help us forgive, for we would be at peace.
-ACIM-W-359:1:5
Forgiveness brings peace.
One of the emotions we resist that keeps us from peace is shame and many of us know what that is. Well we think we know what that is. We can conceptualize it and think we know it but do we really? Shame is a sign, according to Pema Chodron in Going to the Places that Scare You, that we are afraid of feeling something very intense. When we catch ourselves cringing and wincing over something we might have done...we can become aware that there is an intense emotion of unworthiness that we are resisting feeling. Our resistance may come in the form of numbing with things or substances, brain deadening activity like TV binging , crying or over reacting. Instead of just being with the feeling we actively push it away.
Well the more we resist, we know, the more the thing persists. Resisting shame and more accurately the feeling of unworthiness beneath the shame leads us to experience it even more acutely in different ways. Like all suppressed, denied, repressed and intellectualized feelings...shame and fear will pop up in other ways. (I wrote a book about this btw lol) Hmmm!
So what do we do about it? According to the Buddhist tradition, we open up to it and experience it once and for all and then we let it go. We can use a modified form of the Tonglen meditation practice of breathing in suffering and releasing with , in this case, forgiveness, that Pema Chodron guides us through in the video link below.
Steps to breathing in shame/unworthiness and releasing with Forgiveness
1) We begin by visualizing ourselves standing outside our experience watching it. Then we close our eyes and think of one shameful experience that makes us 'wince' when we think about it...something we did or were a part of that we truly regret. Her advice is not to start out with the truly shameful experiences...start with the fairly minor and work up to the big things.
2) We breathe in that 'feeling' of shame and the unworthiness it triggers...breathe in that emotional experience we were resisting. We breathe it in fully and imagine it coming into a very big and open heart. We breathe it into an immense space, attempting to see it for what it is: unobstructed, open, clear energy. Without the story attached to it, without the thoughts and the words...that is all that feeling is. Yet we have avoided it and resisted it...closed up to it our entire lives. Now it is time to open up and see it for what it is. We do this on the in breath. It is normal to feel the usual resistance and defenses at first...keep practicing.
3) Then on the out-breath we send loving kindness and forgiveness to that self that is watching...in whatever way she/he appears to us. As the adult we are now, or a small child...it doesn't matter we embrace and send loving kindness and forgiveness to self.
4) Keeping that cringe-making experience in mind, we continue to breathe in the 'feeling' of shame and unworthiness but this time we breathe in all the shame others might be feeling that is just like ours. We are not alone in our shame. Many people do things they regret and feel guilt and shame for afterwards. Many, many others live with it and attempt to avoid feeling shame. So we breathe in for them as well.
5) We breathe out forgiveness and loving kindness to them too. Sometimes it is easier to forgive others than it is ourselves.
6) Practice that repetitively for many breaths until we feel a certain 'relief' and release. Until we feel the body relaxing into the feeling.
The point is to "feel" the feelings we were spending so much of our energy resisting. We open up to and we experience it fully so we can let it go ...seeing it as an open unobstructed energy. We forgive ourselves and we forgive the world.
Tonglen is the meditative practice of expanding our intentions from the little self to the greater Self, offering forgiveness and loving kindness to all. We can use any form of universal suffering as our focus but in this particular example it is shame.
And in a slightly different way, this is taught in ACIM as well. Let me not forget myself is nothing, but my Self is all. ACIM-W-358:1:7
Forgiveness brings peace.
All is well in my world.
ACIM
Chodron, Pema (Septemeber, 2018) Going to The Places That Scare You. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sLw5QFaFUgI
Sunday, December 30, 2018
Saturday, December 29, 2018
Turn Down the Volume on Resistance
The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.
-Martin Luther King, Jr.
I am going to give you a bit of unsolicited advice...advice I was given today as I was listening to my mentor, Eckhart Tolle speak about how to overcome struggle. (Do you see a pattern here? I am always writing about overcoming suffering. I wonder why? lol)
Stop amplifying the things that seem to"go wrong".
Watch yourself. Are you still complaining about the things that are going in in your life to yourself or to others? Are you feeling 'bothered' by what other people do or don't do? Do you feel like others, circumstances, things are not meeting your expectations of how they should be? Do you feel like Life is constantly sabotaging your efforts to get to where you think you should be able to get with ease? And do these thoughts, words, stories and complaints seem to get very loud in your head or as they come from your mouth?
Turn down the Volume
If so...turn down the volume. Stop amplifying the things that you judge, label and perceive as wrong, difficult and /or unfair. Stop dwelling on them...stop turning up the volume so nothing else can be heard.
Difficulty wakes us up
You see...life isn't meant to be easy. Life is meant to challenge you not sedate you. You are already too sleepy. It is time to wake up. Our so called 'difficulties' wake us up. We wake up not just for ourselves...we wake up for the world.
Not just about 'little me'
The whole world is waking up and you are just one small cog in a big wheel. The whole world has to change and everything will be pushed a bit to change. Every sentient being is challenged by Life at some point? Why? Because without challenge , there is no evolution, no growth, no adaptation, and no change for the better.
Besides the more you insist that Life should be easy and struggle against the reality that it isn't...the more you resist challenges when they arise...the more you resist Life. As long as you are resisting Life...you do not experience the beauty that is Life. The problem is not what happens to you or around you. It is not the things that 'go wrong' or do not meet your expectations. The problem lies in your expectations and your resisting. You expect it should be easy and go a certain way...and when it doesn't you allow your thoughts and complaints to get very noisy.
Accept what Life Offers
Accept challenge for what it offers and therefore Life as it is...and you will see just how beautiful it can all be. You may even learn to see the challenges as doors that help to take you to the truth that exists beyond the obvious? You will not hear the directions that take you through, however, as long as that volume of complaint is amplified in your head.
Turn down the volume on resistance and see the gift in challenges...see the gifts in accepting Life as it is.
All is well in my world.
Friday, December 28, 2018
Flying Beyond Neurotic Labelling
Sometimes letting go is simply changing the labels you put on an event. Looking at the same event with fresh eyes.
Steve Maroboli
What holds us back from experiencing the Ultimate Reality? Many things do including our insane compulsion to judge and label everything in us and around us instead of just experiencing it.
Through our conditioning as human beings we develop a false sense of self and see the world/Life through that narrowed and limiting perception. We therefore judge and label everything in it. Oh "this" is "good"...that is "bad. That is a whatever...putting a very limiting noun on the 'beingness' of something that diminishes it to the word we use to label it with. Avoid that...go after this. This is 'right' and that is 'wrong'. This makes us completely neurotic, does it not?
Labelling is not Living
We live with distorted perceptions because we limit our understanding to what our five senses determine as real and most importantly because we live in a world of judgments and labels. We don't 'experience' the full essence of Life when we' label' it.
I like this analogy Eckhart Tolle and other masters use to describe our limited perceptions and how that leads us to miss the bigger picture. Imagine that you are flying in an airplane through a storm. You are in the midst of heavy clouds and turbulence and the plane is reacting to that turbulence. Scary, right? In those moments you are only aware of what your body is telling you. You see only cloud, hear and feel only the bumpy ride and your own fear. You think this is all there is.
Turbulence?
That turbulence can be like the stuff that is going on around us...Life being Life. It can come when we least expect it. What our mind does is label it as "frightening", " dangerous", "Terrible"...and focuses only on that which cause fear. Not a pleasant way to live, is it? Very neurotic?
Yet most of us live this way...seeing only the clouds and turbulence that are right in front us. Judging Life because of it. We label this experience as Life...when it is nothing more than some momentary turbulence in Life. We might even decide to stop flying all together. We fail to see what exists beyond the clouds.
As long as we are stuck in our thinking minds; as long as we are judging and labelling what is going on around us...we are not aware of what Life really is. We forget that there is more to this experience than the clouds and stormy flying.
What we may not know is that we can actually learn to fly above the turbulence...to take the planes we are in in ( our minds/ our awareness) to the place in which this temporary storm exists.
Fly above the clouds. Fly above the storm and what do you find? Unlimited clear sky and space. This is consciousness. This is who we really are. The cloud, the storm was just something in that space. It did not define our life...because Life is so much bigger than that.
So what do we do to cope with the turbulence?
The first thing we need to do when we experience the turbulence and storms in our lives is to put away our labels. Put away the right and wrong of it, put away the good or bad of it. It just is...accept it...it just is.
Our minds and our bodies will react to storms and passing clouds, especially at first until we master it and learn to fly above That's okay. Just allow...allow the turbulence, allow the reaction. Don't resist it. Resistance only adds to and prolongs the discomfort. And it is the labelling that leads to resistance.
Practice! Then we must begin a committed practice of training the mind to firstly sit with the turbulence without reacting ...without judging...without labelling... and at the same time know that it is not all there is nor is it all you are. It is temporary. That blue sky beyond the turbulence never goes away, it just gets covered from time to time by heavy clouds of life circumstances. Be aware of that space as you practice.
At first the thoughts and the labels and the judgments will persist. Just be aware of them. Be aware of them as clouds or turbulence. Also be aware of the space in which they exist. As you progress, you will eventually be able to get beyond your thinking more and more until you can fly above it into that clear, blue infinite space.
It is all good!
Steve Maroboli
What holds us back from experiencing the Ultimate Reality? Many things do including our insane compulsion to judge and label everything in us and around us instead of just experiencing it.
Through our conditioning as human beings we develop a false sense of self and see the world/Life through that narrowed and limiting perception. We therefore judge and label everything in it. Oh "this" is "good"...that is "bad. That is a whatever...putting a very limiting noun on the 'beingness' of something that diminishes it to the word we use to label it with. Avoid that...go after this. This is 'right' and that is 'wrong'. This makes us completely neurotic, does it not?
Labelling is not Living
We live with distorted perceptions because we limit our understanding to what our five senses determine as real and most importantly because we live in a world of judgments and labels. We don't 'experience' the full essence of Life when we' label' it.
I like this analogy Eckhart Tolle and other masters use to describe our limited perceptions and how that leads us to miss the bigger picture. Imagine that you are flying in an airplane through a storm. You are in the midst of heavy clouds and turbulence and the plane is reacting to that turbulence. Scary, right? In those moments you are only aware of what your body is telling you. You see only cloud, hear and feel only the bumpy ride and your own fear. You think this is all there is.
Turbulence?
That turbulence can be like the stuff that is going on around us...Life being Life. It can come when we least expect it. What our mind does is label it as "frightening", " dangerous", "Terrible"...and focuses only on that which cause fear. Not a pleasant way to live, is it? Very neurotic?
Yet most of us live this way...seeing only the clouds and turbulence that are right in front us. Judging Life because of it. We label this experience as Life...when it is nothing more than some momentary turbulence in Life. We might even decide to stop flying all together. We fail to see what exists beyond the clouds.
As long as we are stuck in our thinking minds; as long as we are judging and labelling what is going on around us...we are not aware of what Life really is. We forget that there is more to this experience than the clouds and stormy flying.
What we may not know is that we can actually learn to fly above the turbulence...to take the planes we are in in ( our minds/ our awareness) to the place in which this temporary storm exists.
Fly above the clouds. Fly above the storm and what do you find? Unlimited clear sky and space. This is consciousness. This is who we really are. The cloud, the storm was just something in that space. It did not define our life...because Life is so much bigger than that.
So what do we do to cope with the turbulence?
The first thing we need to do when we experience the turbulence and storms in our lives is to put away our labels. Put away the right and wrong of it, put away the good or bad of it. It just is...accept it...it just is.
Our minds and our bodies will react to storms and passing clouds, especially at first until we master it and learn to fly above That's okay. Just allow...allow the turbulence, allow the reaction. Don't resist it. Resistance only adds to and prolongs the discomfort. And it is the labelling that leads to resistance.
Practice! Then we must begin a committed practice of training the mind to firstly sit with the turbulence without reacting ...without judging...without labelling... and at the same time know that it is not all there is nor is it all you are. It is temporary. That blue sky beyond the turbulence never goes away, it just gets covered from time to time by heavy clouds of life circumstances. Be aware of that space as you practice.
At first the thoughts and the labels and the judgments will persist. Just be aware of them. Be aware of them as clouds or turbulence. Also be aware of the space in which they exist. As you progress, you will eventually be able to get beyond your thinking more and more until you can fly above it into that clear, blue infinite space.
It is all good!
Thursday, December 27, 2018
A little more learning from A Course
Always walk through Life as if you have something new to learn and you will.
-Vernon Howard
More from ACIM's final lessons.
Once again I rushed through the lessons for holiday reasons. I want to clasp their meaning so I put them here.
The Terminolgy
Before I begin I want to clarify some confusion that may arise from the terminology. As I have stressed before...terms, words, descriptors are just pointers that do not adequately describe what something 'is'. Getting hung up on the words can therefore limit the Beingness of something and thus our true understanding of it.
We are conditioned to think in such limited terms. We see God as this paternal figure in the sky and thus limit Him in that way. We use the pronouns Him...to limit him to a gender or human form probably because it is less threatening for us to do so. We therefore limit the term "Father" ...when a father is a "creator" . God is the Creator of all things...is how I see God. I do use the "Him" and the "Father" because it is familiar with my upbringing but again these are just words.
A Course in Miracles is full of masculine terminology, using 'brother' and brotherhood' , 'Son 'etc....why I am not sure other than it is trying to reach human understanding in a patriarchal mindset. Don't get hung up on that...see "brother' as just a word used to express 'human' and brotherhood as 'humanity. Son is all God's human creation. It helps. Women and children are included, no less or no more significantly than man.
'Christ' is a big one people may have trouble with and therefore deem this text to be sacra religious. The text and lessons keep referring to all of us as Christ when we become fully awakened. It took me a long time to figure that out . It is not saying we are Jesus. Jesus was the Messiah of the Christ. It is saying that we are One with Jesus when we become awakened to the truth of who we are..."God's creations'. I see "Christ" as consciousness...the unified consciousness. It is this that Jesus taught when He said the "Kingdom of Heaven is within". The truth is within us...this consciousness is within us.
Not Preaching anything! Just Learning!
I am not asking you to read A Course...to believe any of it or what I say here. I am just writing down some wisdom I have gained from it. If it is not for you , it is not for you. As I finish the lessons for the third and possibly final time, however, I want to ensure I have gained all that was meant to be gained from this text before I put it away.
Like everything I approach, I do so with an open mind...I read, I study and then I evaluate its effect on me. Did it resonate? Did I "feel" it? Does it seem like truth? The answer to these questions is, "Yes it resonated , made sense and seemed like truth. And I feel it was speaking to me and all humanity. It feels 'right' to me as I begin awakening."
Love these words from Lesson 352.
Judgment and love are opposites. From one come all the sorrows of the world. But from the other comes the peace of God Himself.
Let's look at this statement in more detail. Judgment and Love are opposites?
Well judgment ...the duality of our perceptions...this need to determine good or bad, right or wrong, ugly or beautiful etc makes us resist life and keeps us in a mental prison of fear. We retract with judgment.Thus creating sorrow and our version of "suffering". Now remember suffering/"dukkha" is not necessarily pain...it is resistance of pain because we judge it as something to be avoided.
Love on the other hand is freedom. We expand with Love. Love is acceptance of Life as it is...therefore it is an acceptance of what God offers us. This brings peace.
Lesson 353
Nothing is mine alone....Then I lose myself in my Identity, and recognize that Christ is but my Self.
This lesson speaks to the Greater Self over the little "self". The Greater self encompasses all humanity to which A Course refers to as 'Christ'. Christ represents all of us...one united 'brotherhood' of man (though the terminology is masculine it is meant to include women and children) which Jesus was the messiah of. I think of it as united consciousness. So we join with one another...we join Christ in this mission to awaken the world...in so doing we lose this little version of 'self' for the greater Identity of Self. Yoga also refers to Self.
Lesson 354
I have no self except the Christ in me
Again we are taken back to this united consciousness in this lesson. The only true Identity we have is the Christ in us. We are all children of the Creator-God and we stand together in peace.
Lesson 355
There is no end to all the peace and joy, and all the miracles that I will give, when I accept God's Word.....
I see this to mean that when we accept God's Word, His will for us...Life as it is...we will 'awaken'...we will find true peace and joy. The miracle refers to this awakening to the Truth of who and what we are and the freedom from our mental egoic prisons it will offer us.
I am sure my treasure waits for me, and I need but reach out my hand to find it. It is very close. I need but wait an instant more to be at peace forever. The Lesson goes on to say that this treasure, this Truth, waits for all of us and we are so very close...we are actually touching it and it is but an instant away from us. We just have to wake up to see it and experience it. We are so close to God.
Lesson 356
Healing is but another name for God,
Knowing God is everything...it heals all wounds and puts away all illusions.
Lesson 357
Truth answers every call we make to God, responding first with miracles, and then returning unto us to be itself.
The truth of who we are and what Life is beyond all our conditioning ...will answer us ....when we seek God. We will see this truth in miracles (in healing, in understanding, in recognizing...and in our ability to forgive ourselves and each other for our confusion up until then)
Forgiveness, truth's reflection, tells me how to offer miracles, and thus escape the prison house in which I think I live.
The miracle we offer is our forgiveness...it is the most healing thing we can give and receive because it means we put aside our illusions and see the world, ourselves and God for What It really is.
"Behold his sinlessness, and be you healed."
This is the only true healing.
All is well!
Wednesday, December 26, 2018
Seasons Greetings
He who has not Christmas in in his heart will never find it under the tree.
-Roy L. Smith
I hope everyone have /has a blessed couple of weeks regardless of your religious or cultural conditioning. Though I absolutely hate the commercialized version of Christmas (pretty strong I know lol) I do like that this time of the year reminds the world to look within their hearts for true meaning. This true meaning goes way beyond the gifting and the decorating. It is peace that Christ brought to man. So regardless if we practice Christianity or not...we can celebrate peace and hold it in our hearts throughout the year, can we not?
I wish you peace this season.
-Roy L. Smith
I hope everyone have /has a blessed couple of weeks regardless of your religious or cultural conditioning. Though I absolutely hate the commercialized version of Christmas (pretty strong I know lol) I do like that this time of the year reminds the world to look within their hearts for true meaning. This true meaning goes way beyond the gifting and the decorating. It is peace that Christ brought to man. So regardless if we practice Christianity or not...we can celebrate peace and hold it in our hearts throughout the year, can we not?
I wish you peace this season.
Saturday, December 22, 2018
Lessons from A Course
Getting down to the last few daily lessons from A Course in Miracles, third time around. They mean more to me every time. I had a lot of things going around me...whoever me is...and I may have rushed through the last few lessons. I want to make sure I learned what was meant to be learned.
Some key points in those lessons:
Straighten my mind, my Father. It is sick.
-ACIM Lesson 347: 1: 2-3
What need have I for anger or for fear? Surrounding me is perfect safety.
-ACIM Lesson 348: 1:4-5
For this do I obey the law of love, and give what I would find and make my own. It will be given me, because I have chosen it as the gift I want to give.
-Lesson 349:1:2
What he is, is unaffected by his thoughts. But what he looks upon is their direct result.
-ACIM: Lesson 350:1:4-5
In the section of the workbook entitled, What am I? This answer is given:
Yet this perception is the choice I make and can relinquish.
ACIM:351:1:3
All good.
Some key points in those lessons:
Straighten my mind, my Father. It is sick.
-ACIM Lesson 347: 1: 2-3
What need have I for anger or for fear? Surrounding me is perfect safety.
-ACIM Lesson 348: 1:4-5
For this do I obey the law of love, and give what I would find and make my own. It will be given me, because I have chosen it as the gift I want to give.
-Lesson 349:1:2
What he is, is unaffected by his thoughts. But what he looks upon is their direct result.
-ACIM: Lesson 350:1:4-5
In the section of the workbook entitled, What am I? This answer is given:
- God's child
- complete, healed and whole
- a being where love is perfected, fear impossible and joy established
- saviours of the world
- perceivers of kindness and of good
- concerned only with the truth
- part of the Oneness...sharers of our peace and joy
- the holy messengers of God and we learn the message is written on our hearts
- we bring tidings of redemption to our brothers who think they have suffered
Yet this perception is the choice I make and can relinquish.
ACIM:351:1:3
All good.
Thursday, December 20, 2018
Fragile
How fragile this cup I hold in my two hands. I suddenly realize it will not last.
Like all of the surface phenomenon of Life, it will crumble; it will die; it will pass.
I look down at these hands, wrinkled with passing time and see the same
like the cup, this idea of me in its aging form, is just a chip in ego's cruel game.
Nothing lasts. The clock's busy second hand will someday cease its distracting noise
and the magic secrets of past and future will be revealed as deceptive ploys.
Bodies will die, yours and mine. The things we cling to will rust , decay and get lost.
Our desire to win a game or two as ego deals, will always come at cost.
The continuous flux of worldly things will surely turn to rubble and bury us alive
but if you find your little self choking on the dust beneath the debris, fighting to survive...
Stop for a second, quiet your mind and listen . Be still. Allow the door of truth to open.
Through just a crack you will see the absolute reality when true vision has awoken.
There is something there that is not fragile, that is permanent, real, remaining as it is.
This timeless awareness of who you are will show you there is so much more than 'this'.
From that place of knowing just watch the insignificant pass and enjoy the changing scenery.
Learn to breathe, learn to smile, learn to love and learn to simply be.
Dale-Lyn Dec 2018
Just popped out as I was listening to Eckhart Tolle. Not me...just through me...so I can't take the blame or the credit for it lol. Feel compelled to put it here even though it is embarrassing for my poet ego to do so lol.
All is well.
How fragile this cup I hold in my two hands. I suddenly realize it will not last.
Like all of the surface phenomenon of Life, it will crumble; it will die; it will pass.
I look down at these hands, wrinkled with passing time and see the same
like the cup, this idea of me in its aging form, is just a chip in ego's cruel game.
Nothing lasts. The clock's busy second hand will someday cease its distracting noise
and the magic secrets of past and future will be revealed as deceptive ploys.
Bodies will die, yours and mine. The things we cling to will rust , decay and get lost.
Our desire to win a game or two as ego deals, will always come at cost.
The continuous flux of worldly things will surely turn to rubble and bury us alive
but if you find your little self choking on the dust beneath the debris, fighting to survive...
Stop for a second, quiet your mind and listen . Be still. Allow the door of truth to open.
Through just a crack you will see the absolute reality when true vision has awoken.
There is something there that is not fragile, that is permanent, real, remaining as it is.
This timeless awareness of who you are will show you there is so much more than 'this'.
From that place of knowing just watch the insignificant pass and enjoy the changing scenery.
Learn to breathe, learn to smile, learn to love and learn to simply be.
Dale-Lyn Dec 2018
Just popped out as I was listening to Eckhart Tolle. Not me...just through me...so I can't take the blame or the credit for it lol. Feel compelled to put it here even though it is embarrassing for my poet ego to do so lol.
All is well.
Wednesday, December 19, 2018
Do we Need Suffering?
Suffering is necessary until you realize you don't need it any more.
-Eckhart Tolle
Does suffering serve a purpose?
Yes I believe it does....at first. Suffering can wake us up. In my own life it took a certain amount of suffering to make me want to understand it so I could transcend it. If it wasn't for suffering I wouldn't be where I am right now...and despite what is happening around me....I like where I am.
How long does it take to realize this?
It was a slow journey for me but it doesn't always have to be. Some people get it right away, in what A Course refers to as The Holy Instant. My experience was more like a holy half- century(though it didn't always feel very holy lol). I am finally seeing what I need to see.
What is it that you are seeing?
I am seeing that my life situation comes from time and thought. It is of the mind, more specifically the ego and is wrought with "problems," with past imprisonment and future projection. Man, the ego loves problems and mental chaos, doesn't it? It is always looking for the problem in every moment to take us away from that moment.
What I am also seeing, however, is that there is a big distinction between my life situation and my life and I can step our of my life situation and into Life any time. Life situation is purely a mental construct...a story I created in my head. Life is who I am. As Eckhart Tolle says, You are life; you don't have a life.
Life is consciousness, awareness, of the Deeper I/ or universal Self . Life situation is of the little I...and the mind, the ego. There are no problems in the realm of the true Self. The only problem is when the deeper I gets obscured.
Obscured by what?
It gets obscured by our mind stuff: our focus on this time idea (clinging to the past or projecting hope and fear into our so called futures), on thought, on doing and on our seeking things of the external world to fulfill what doesn't need to be fulfilled. Life is perfect as it is; you are perfect as you are right here, right now but this mind stuff covers it all up with layers and layers of dirt and grim over the most magnificent light. This perfect expression of Life, which we are, can not therefore be seen, heard, felt or expressed as long as it is covered by mind stuff. It is the mind stuff that causes the suffering....not Life.
Are you saying that Life is easy?
No. Life can be pretty challenging at times. It is not meant to be easy. Sure Life throws certain situations our way for whatever reason it does in its ultimate wisdom. Sure ...those situations may not always be pleasant. Yet that is not what causes suffering.
It is what this mind stuff does with what we are handed...that creates Dukkha. We place our distorted mental perceptions, judgments and fears on 'external circumstance' to turn it into suffering. We condemn it, we struggle against it, we resist it and we fight it...so we make what we are dealing with (or refusing to deal with) in the present moment the enemy.
We do that...Life doesn't.
So what do we do about the 'suffering'?
Step out of your life situation...just for a moment...because that is all there is....and into your Life. Your Life is now...in this present moment. It is not in yesterday and it is not in a future that will never come. Life is not a story or a clump of moving thoughts in your head. It is stillness It is right here and right now.
Then when we truly realize that...we won't need suffering anymore. We can transcend it.
Become aware of the present moment and become aware that you are awareness.
It is all good.
References
Tolle, Eckhart. (November, 2018) The Journey into Now. Retrieved from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6tKe_Tvtq8Q
-Eckhart Tolle
Does suffering serve a purpose?
Yes I believe it does....at first. Suffering can wake us up. In my own life it took a certain amount of suffering to make me want to understand it so I could transcend it. If it wasn't for suffering I wouldn't be where I am right now...and despite what is happening around me....I like where I am.
How long does it take to realize this?
It was a slow journey for me but it doesn't always have to be. Some people get it right away, in what A Course refers to as The Holy Instant. My experience was more like a holy half- century(though it didn't always feel very holy lol). I am finally seeing what I need to see.
What is it that you are seeing?
I am seeing that my life situation comes from time and thought. It is of the mind, more specifically the ego and is wrought with "problems," with past imprisonment and future projection. Man, the ego loves problems and mental chaos, doesn't it? It is always looking for the problem in every moment to take us away from that moment.
What I am also seeing, however, is that there is a big distinction between my life situation and my life and I can step our of my life situation and into Life any time. Life situation is purely a mental construct...a story I created in my head. Life is who I am. As Eckhart Tolle says, You are life; you don't have a life.
Life is consciousness, awareness, of the Deeper I/ or universal Self . Life situation is of the little I...and the mind, the ego. There are no problems in the realm of the true Self. The only problem is when the deeper I gets obscured.
Obscured by what?
It gets obscured by our mind stuff: our focus on this time idea (clinging to the past or projecting hope and fear into our so called futures), on thought, on doing and on our seeking things of the external world to fulfill what doesn't need to be fulfilled. Life is perfect as it is; you are perfect as you are right here, right now but this mind stuff covers it all up with layers and layers of dirt and grim over the most magnificent light. This perfect expression of Life, which we are, can not therefore be seen, heard, felt or expressed as long as it is covered by mind stuff. It is the mind stuff that causes the suffering....not Life.
Are you saying that Life is easy?
No. Life can be pretty challenging at times. It is not meant to be easy. Sure Life throws certain situations our way for whatever reason it does in its ultimate wisdom. Sure ...those situations may not always be pleasant. Yet that is not what causes suffering.
It is what this mind stuff does with what we are handed...that creates Dukkha. We place our distorted mental perceptions, judgments and fears on 'external circumstance' to turn it into suffering. We condemn it, we struggle against it, we resist it and we fight it...so we make what we are dealing with (or refusing to deal with) in the present moment the enemy.
We do that...Life doesn't.
So what do we do about the 'suffering'?
Step out of your life situation...just for a moment...because that is all there is....and into your Life. Your Life is now...in this present moment. It is not in yesterday and it is not in a future that will never come. Life is not a story or a clump of moving thoughts in your head. It is stillness It is right here and right now.
Then when we truly realize that...we won't need suffering anymore. We can transcend it.
Become aware of the present moment and become aware that you are awareness.
It is all good.
References
Tolle, Eckhart. (November, 2018) The Journey into Now. Retrieved from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6tKe_Tvtq8Q
Tuesday, December 18, 2018
The Greatest of All Miracles
To be alive and to know you are alive is the greatest of all miracles.
-Thich Nhat Hanh
Such simple but profound truth in that statement from this little man. To be alive is enough and to know you are alive is the ultimate, is it not? That is the basis of all the teaching that has come my way over the last decade of so called "hardship". It is finally sinking in.
To experience that aliveness deeply and fully is basically what we all want...truly want ...and all we need, whether it seems that way or not. That's joy...that is true happiness.
Where do we find this sense of aliveness? In the present moment, in the here and the now. It just is. Yet most of us are spending all our precious energy clinging to the past or projecting onto the future. We are hooked on doing. How foolish that is.
Instead of walking into the full expansion of being alive, we contract and retract away from it in fear using time and "seeking more" to do.
I did these videos up in February on retraction and expansion. You may or may not get a bit of something from them. I share them here again because I feel compelled to do so.
-Thich Nhat Hanh
Such simple but profound truth in that statement from this little man. To be alive is enough and to know you are alive is the ultimate, is it not? That is the basis of all the teaching that has come my way over the last decade of so called "hardship". It is finally sinking in.
To experience that aliveness deeply and fully is basically what we all want...truly want ...and all we need, whether it seems that way or not. That's joy...that is true happiness.
Where do we find this sense of aliveness? In the present moment, in the here and the now. It just is. Yet most of us are spending all our precious energy clinging to the past or projecting onto the future. We are hooked on doing. How foolish that is.
Instead of walking into the full expansion of being alive, we contract and retract away from it in fear using time and "seeking more" to do.
I did these videos up in February on retraction and expansion. You may or may not get a bit of something from them. I share them here again because I feel compelled to do so.
Can you hear my lovely old dog Hiedi snoring in the back ground? lol I have counted over 100 things I could improve upon in these videos, including the misuse of the English langauge on many occassions and my William Shatner speaking techniques (okay when he did the pauses, me not so much...lol). How imperfect these and I, as the human delivering them, are. Isn't it amazing, though, to be able to recognize the imperfect human in our experiences and be okay with it? lol
All is well!
Sunday, December 16, 2018
In the Here and Now
"In the here, in the now" is the address of Life.
-Thich Nhat Hanh, peace is every breath, pg 32
I am so grateful for Thich Nhat Hanh's presence on this earth and his simple teachings echoed by so many others as well. It is all so simple and "real".
Mindfulness is the key to experiencing Life and all its bounty. The most precious priority for us should be our peace and joy. Where do we find it? In this moment and in this moment only. By simply concentrating on our breath or the steps we are taking and seeing it as a sign that we are alive...is something to be so very grateful for.
Breathe
Breathe in, I feel my breath coming into my belly and chest.
Breathing out, I feel my breath flowing out of my belly and chest
Breathing in, I feel well.
Breathing out, I feel at ease.
Walk
I have arrived, I am home
in the here, in the now.
I am solid, I am free.
In the ultimate I dwell.
On one step say to self " I have arrived; I am home." You are really where you want to be, the one place that will bring peace. This moment is your home. On the next step say, "in the here, in the now." Solid and free means that you are not being pulled back by ghosts from the past and you are not being dragged into the future. This, according to Hanh, is the foundation of real happiness. What is the ultimate (step four)? The moment, of course,. This moment is teh ultimate everything.
Don't you just want to go home? I know I do. All it takes to do so is a bit of mindfulness.
All is well in my world.
Thich Nhat Hanh ( 2011) peace is every breath. New York: Harper One
-Thich Nhat Hanh, peace is every breath, pg 32
I am so grateful for Thich Nhat Hanh's presence on this earth and his simple teachings echoed by so many others as well. It is all so simple and "real".
Mindfulness is the key to experiencing Life and all its bounty. The most precious priority for us should be our peace and joy. Where do we find it? In this moment and in this moment only. By simply concentrating on our breath or the steps we are taking and seeing it as a sign that we are alive...is something to be so very grateful for.
Breathe
Breathe in, I feel my breath coming into my belly and chest.
Breathing out, I feel my breath flowing out of my belly and chest
Breathing in, I feel well.
Breathing out, I feel at ease.
Walk
I have arrived, I am home
in the here, in the now.
I am solid, I am free.
In the ultimate I dwell.
On one step say to self " I have arrived; I am home." You are really where you want to be, the one place that will bring peace. This moment is your home. On the next step say, "in the here, in the now." Solid and free means that you are not being pulled back by ghosts from the past and you are not being dragged into the future. This, according to Hanh, is the foundation of real happiness. What is the ultimate (step four)? The moment, of course,. This moment is teh ultimate everything.
Don't you just want to go home? I know I do. All it takes to do so is a bit of mindfulness.
All is well in my world.
Thich Nhat Hanh ( 2011) peace is every breath. New York: Harper One
Saturday, December 15, 2018
Peace to all seeking hearts
Peace to all seeking hearts today.
-ACIM-W-345:2:1
For we will learn today what peace is ours, when we forget all things except God's Love.
-ACIM-W-346:2:2
-ACIM-W-345:2:1
For we will learn today what peace is ours, when we forget all things except God's Love.
-ACIM-W-346:2:2
Thursday, December 13, 2018
Wise Thoughts about Life and Death from "the untethered soul"
The beauty of deep truths is that you don't have to change your life; you just change how you live your life. It's not what you are doing: it is how much of you is doing it.
page 160
Life itself is your career, and your interaction with life is your most meaningful relationship
page 161
What actually gives life meaning is the willingness to live it. It isn't any particular event; it's the willingness to experience life's events.
page 161
You are not living life;you are living mind
pge 161
You should be experiencing the life that is happening to you, not the one you wish was happening.
page 163
You really don't need more time before death; what you need is more depth of experience during the time you are given.
page 163
I am not afraid of dying anymore. That is one of the reasons why I am so willing to put away my health seeking. As long as I was seeking I was clinging to life in fear of death. Now I feel free to live my life...whatever time I have left. Don't get me wrong...I don't want to die any time soon nor do I think I necessarily will...but I am not resisting death any longer. Resisting death equates to resisting Life. I want to embrace life. And as Michael Singer puts it...what a wonderful teacher death is.
All is well
You need to read:
Singer, Michael (2007) Chapter 17: contemplating death. the untethered soul. New Harbinger.
page 160
Life itself is your career, and your interaction with life is your most meaningful relationship
page 161
What actually gives life meaning is the willingness to live it. It isn't any particular event; it's the willingness to experience life's events.
page 161
You are not living life;you are living mind
pge 161
You should be experiencing the life that is happening to you, not the one you wish was happening.
page 163
You really don't need more time before death; what you need is more depth of experience during the time you are given.
page 163
I am not afraid of dying anymore. That is one of the reasons why I am so willing to put away my health seeking. As long as I was seeking I was clinging to life in fear of death. Now I feel free to live my life...whatever time I have left. Don't get me wrong...I don't want to die any time soon nor do I think I necessarily will...but I am not resisting death any longer. Resisting death equates to resisting Life. I want to embrace life. And as Michael Singer puts it...what a wonderful teacher death is.
All is well
You need to read:
Singer, Michael (2007) Chapter 17: contemplating death. the untethered soul. New Harbinger.
Wednesday, December 12, 2018
Relax and Release
No matter what events take place in life, it is always better to let go rather than to close.
Michael Singer, the untethered soul, page 67
If we are going to depend on words to support our experiences (and let's face it most of us will be thought and word junkies while we tramp through this planet), there are two valuable words we can use as guide posts: Relax and Release. I have talked about these concepts from the beginning of this blog and there are so many others who do so as well, much more eloquently and much more read than I will ever be able to.
Relax
When I think of the sound advice offered by Michael Singer and so many others: "Relax". I think of this little video I did a year ago on the need to de-stress and put an end to the low grade stress response that is taking over so many of our lives. I strongly believe that most disease/dis-ease is a result of an inability or refusal to "relax".
Many of us spend our lives contracted and tense as we stay stuck in low grade stress responses. This stress often comes from building defenses around ourselves to protect us from Life. We are on a mission to protect some illusion we have of ourselves from all that is "out there" that may harm it. We cling to ideas, we build walls , we defend , we attack, we hope for some validation in special relationships and we seek to fill in holes we assume we have in us. We see relaxation as a 'sin" almost and force ourselves to do, do and do.
Man that takes so much energy to do that...and what do we get from all our hard work? Are we able to cling and stop "bad" things from happening? Absolutely not. We just get stressed out, burned out or sick. Believe me, I know from my own experiences.
Release
This is the biggy. If we really want to relax and be happy and peaceful as we were meant to be....we need to release. We need to release and let go of our resistance to Life. We need to release and let go of our attachment to things and stuff that will never make us happy. We need to release and let go of illusions we cling to about who we are and what the world owes us. We need to release and let go of our walls that are not protecting us, but smothering us. We need to release resistance.
Most of our unhappiness is a result of our resistance to this moment. Life is this moment so we resist what it offers us because it is not as we assume it should be...we resist Life. How contracted, how bound up, how blocked and miserable that makes us.
Release resistance and let Life do what Life does. Accept the moment as it is and learn to embrace it...for that is the true secret to happiness.
All is well in my world.
References
Singer, Michael. (2007) the untethered soul. New York: New Harbinger.
Michael Singer, the untethered soul, page 67
If we are going to depend on words to support our experiences (and let's face it most of us will be thought and word junkies while we tramp through this planet), there are two valuable words we can use as guide posts: Relax and Release. I have talked about these concepts from the beginning of this blog and there are so many others who do so as well, much more eloquently and much more read than I will ever be able to.
Relax
Many of us spend our lives contracted and tense as we stay stuck in low grade stress responses. This stress often comes from building defenses around ourselves to protect us from Life. We are on a mission to protect some illusion we have of ourselves from all that is "out there" that may harm it. We cling to ideas, we build walls , we defend , we attack, we hope for some validation in special relationships and we seek to fill in holes we assume we have in us. We see relaxation as a 'sin" almost and force ourselves to do, do and do.
Man that takes so much energy to do that...and what do we get from all our hard work? Are we able to cling and stop "bad" things from happening? Absolutely not. We just get stressed out, burned out or sick. Believe me, I know from my own experiences.
Release
This is the biggy. If we really want to relax and be happy and peaceful as we were meant to be....we need to release. We need to release and let go of our resistance to Life. We need to release and let go of our attachment to things and stuff that will never make us happy. We need to release and let go of illusions we cling to about who we are and what the world owes us. We need to release and let go of our walls that are not protecting us, but smothering us. We need to release resistance.
Most of our unhappiness is a result of our resistance to this moment. Life is this moment so we resist what it offers us because it is not as we assume it should be...we resist Life. How contracted, how bound up, how blocked and miserable that makes us.
Release resistance and let Life do what Life does. Accept the moment as it is and learn to embrace it...for that is the true secret to happiness.
All is well in my world.
References
Singer, Michael. (2007) the untethered soul. New York: New Harbinger.
Monday, December 10, 2018
Don't Close!
How long have you been struggling in there to keep it all together? Any time anything goes wrong in the protective model you built around yourself, you defend and rationalize to get it back together. Your mind does not stop struggling until you've processed the event or somehow made it go away.
-Michael Singer, the untethered soul, page 136
According to Michael Singer, in the untethered soul, the solution to ending all suffering is, "Don't close!" As human beings we have a tendency to close up the doors of invisible fortresses that we have built around ourselves to protect us from whatever is going on "out there.". We fear Life more than we embrace Life...we close up to it because we are afraid of what it offers us. We become overly comfortable in our home-made comfort zones as a result, and unconsciously resort to pseudo -protection behind images of who and what we are.
We resist and resist and resist anything coming through or anything seeping out. Yet keeping these walls up takes remarkable energy and we constantly feel the outside weather beating against them. Heaven forbid something should blow open and the unexpected should flow in or our vulnerable selves should slip out. We suffer.
When we close up ...we not only stop the judged "bad" from coming in ...we do not let the light in either. We do not only stop the "unwanted" from hurting us...we stop the love from going out to heal others and ourselves. Constantly being on guard, defending and attacking from walls that really do not have any foundation in the true sense, is suffering.
We learn this when our walls eventually crumble or the doors, because of wear and tear, no longer seal. What a wonderful thing that is, when that happens. At first it is frightening as we face all the things we were afraid to face...then we see them for what they really are. The light shines in and around us and we realize we never ever needed any walls.
Our hearts and our minds are meant to be full of love and light. When we choose to close them up behind dark walls...we do not experience that love and light and we do not share it with the world. It is time we put away our defenses and let the light in and the light out...as it was meant to be.
Don't Close!
There is no need for false solidity when you are at peace with the universal expanse of your true being.
-page 137
All is well in my world.
Reference
Singer, Michael ( 2007) the untethered soul. Oakland: New Harbinger Publications
-Michael Singer, the untethered soul, page 136
According to Michael Singer, in the untethered soul, the solution to ending all suffering is, "Don't close!" As human beings we have a tendency to close up the doors of invisible fortresses that we have built around ourselves to protect us from whatever is going on "out there.". We fear Life more than we embrace Life...we close up to it because we are afraid of what it offers us. We become overly comfortable in our home-made comfort zones as a result, and unconsciously resort to pseudo -protection behind images of who and what we are.
We resist and resist and resist anything coming through or anything seeping out. Yet keeping these walls up takes remarkable energy and we constantly feel the outside weather beating against them. Heaven forbid something should blow open and the unexpected should flow in or our vulnerable selves should slip out. We suffer.
When we close up ...we not only stop the judged "bad" from coming in ...we do not let the light in either. We do not only stop the "unwanted" from hurting us...we stop the love from going out to heal others and ourselves. Constantly being on guard, defending and attacking from walls that really do not have any foundation in the true sense, is suffering.
We learn this when our walls eventually crumble or the doors, because of wear and tear, no longer seal. What a wonderful thing that is, when that happens. At first it is frightening as we face all the things we were afraid to face...then we see them for what they really are. The light shines in and around us and we realize we never ever needed any walls.
Our hearts and our minds are meant to be full of love and light. When we choose to close them up behind dark walls...we do not experience that love and light and we do not share it with the world. It is time we put away our defenses and let the light in and the light out...as it was meant to be.
Don't Close!
There is no need for false solidity when you are at peace with the universal expanse of your true being.
-page 137
All is well in my world.
Reference
Singer, Michael ( 2007) the untethered soul. Oakland: New Harbinger Publications
Sunday, December 9, 2018
What we really want
Let us resolve today to ask for what we really want, and only this, that we may spend the day in fearlessness, without confusing pain with joy, or fear with love.
-ACIM-W-339:1:9
Are you asking for what you really want or are you confused about the things you want and the state you will attain from your request? Are you getting the things you ask for and are those things bringing you happiness?
According to ACIM, you will get what you ask for, "I will receive whatever I request." Too often we ask for "things" that we assume will bring happiness but that only bring pain. Too often we confuse suffering with peace because we live in fear rather than love. Most of us are pretty mixed up in the request department of our lives.:)
I am finally coming to terms with the fact that what I really want from Life is peace not pain. I was asking for pain for a big portion of my life...playing a victim of suffering thinking it would get me somewhere. It didn't. It only brought more suffering. As I started asking for peace, Life started testing me, pushing my faith to the point so my seeking would become more purposeful.
As I sat where I was on Thursday, intending to find peace by finally putting closure on my health seeking journey, my family (who didn't know where I was at that time or why) was desperately trying to get a hold of me to tell me that our 61 year old brother had infarcted and was rushed to Calgary General for surgery. If you knew my whole story you would realize just how ironic that is!
If they were to reach me in those hours, I would never have made the decision I did. I would have opted to continue my "crusade" as it was referred to. You see... I embarked on my mission to find answers and retribution as somewhat of a Templar Knight...seeking to protect future pilgrims from nasty and unfair decisions and to protect my family from further injury. For the longest time...I thought I was doing the "right" thing no matter how unsuccessful I seemed to be at it.
While my brother was unknowingly being wheeled into the cardiac OR...I was in a room miles away from where he was, making a decision that could change all our lives. I had decided to put down my sword and my red crossed cape and accept a life of peace instead. I was so tired from carrying that heavy burden for as long as I did. No matter how I tried I was not getting anywhere...not helping anyone. I wasn't a very good knight :) Selfishly, I just wanted closure.
It was more than coincidental that my brother infarcted in those very same hours of my deciding to let go. Why was I not able to get my sister's messages at that time when there was no reason why I should not have been able to? That was indeed serendipity at its best. Though part of my argument was my family history, he was not one of the siblings on that list. He was added to it that day...making it six of us. Who, but the most close minded or fearfully defensive, could call that coincidence?
I don't know what I am to learn from this yet. I don't know what to ask for from here on in ..except...except... peace. It is still what I ask for...for myself and all those in my life. I want peace for me and I want peace for others. Hopefully I will live long enough to attain it and to share it.
All is well
-ACIM-W-339:1:9
Are you asking for what you really want or are you confused about the things you want and the state you will attain from your request? Are you getting the things you ask for and are those things bringing you happiness?
According to ACIM, you will get what you ask for, "I will receive whatever I request." Too often we ask for "things" that we assume will bring happiness but that only bring pain. Too often we confuse suffering with peace because we live in fear rather than love. Most of us are pretty mixed up in the request department of our lives.:)
I am finally coming to terms with the fact that what I really want from Life is peace not pain. I was asking for pain for a big portion of my life...playing a victim of suffering thinking it would get me somewhere. It didn't. It only brought more suffering. As I started asking for peace, Life started testing me, pushing my faith to the point so my seeking would become more purposeful.
As I sat where I was on Thursday, intending to find peace by finally putting closure on my health seeking journey, my family (who didn't know where I was at that time or why) was desperately trying to get a hold of me to tell me that our 61 year old brother had infarcted and was rushed to Calgary General for surgery. If you knew my whole story you would realize just how ironic that is!
If they were to reach me in those hours, I would never have made the decision I did. I would have opted to continue my "crusade" as it was referred to. You see... I embarked on my mission to find answers and retribution as somewhat of a Templar Knight...seeking to protect future pilgrims from nasty and unfair decisions and to protect my family from further injury. For the longest time...I thought I was doing the "right" thing no matter how unsuccessful I seemed to be at it.
While my brother was unknowingly being wheeled into the cardiac OR...I was in a room miles away from where he was, making a decision that could change all our lives. I had decided to put down my sword and my red crossed cape and accept a life of peace instead. I was so tired from carrying that heavy burden for as long as I did. No matter how I tried I was not getting anywhere...not helping anyone. I wasn't a very good knight :) Selfishly, I just wanted closure.
It was more than coincidental that my brother infarcted in those very same hours of my deciding to let go. Why was I not able to get my sister's messages at that time when there was no reason why I should not have been able to? That was indeed serendipity at its best. Though part of my argument was my family history, he was not one of the siblings on that list. He was added to it that day...making it six of us. Who, but the most close minded or fearfully defensive, could call that coincidence?
I don't know what I am to learn from this yet. I don't know what to ask for from here on in ..except...except... peace. It is still what I ask for...for myself and all those in my life. I want peace for me and I want peace for others. Hopefully I will live long enough to attain it and to share it.
All is well
Saturday, December 8, 2018
Everything will be Okay
The truth is, everything will be okay as soon as you are okay with everything. And that is the only time everything will be okay.
-Michael Singer untethered soul- page 95
Wow! How can I speak to that piece of wisdom? In its perfect simplicity it tells us that peace is our own making. It isn't about making everything "out there" work perfectly in our favor. It is simply about being okay with things no matter how they turn out.
I learned the value of that wisdom Thursday. I was in a situation where I was originally determined to do more than break even for some monetary losses incurred because of events that were beyond my control. During the hours I sat there, I made a decision to put away my struggle to make a point for peace; to put away my anger and resentment for forgiveness; to put away my desire for a secure future for the psychological release of letting go of the past and to put away my wish for more for just enough to pay off my debts and to assist my children in the small ways I have not been able to assist them for years.
I could have went further. I know that...I mean I really know that. I could have caused a lot of trouble for the other side. But something in me...told me to let go. Just let go. It wasn't any longer about "winning" and proving how right I was nor was it about losing. It was just about peace. I wanted peace more than anything.
Sure...I am no farther ahead in knowing how I will survive in the future but I will not owe and I will have helped my children in some small way...that is all that matters.
Isn't this the direction I truly wanted to go in? Am I not learning about what is really important? About the internal harm in grasping and clinging to things of form and the freedom that comes from letting go of our mental attachments to things?
I can't say I walked away feeling thrilled or excited as others seemed to want me to believe I should lol. I walked away feeling nothing really...not excitement, not a tremendous amount of relief, not hope or a sense of security that I thought I would walk away with....but...but...I also did not walk away with grief, anger, resentment, loss, fear, or worry. The thing is, I walked away psychologically unaffected by the outcome. That to me says it all...that to me shows how much I have grown and healed.
My peace is not determined by what happens around me or to me. Everything is okay as it is. Why? Because I am okay with everything.
How cool is that?
All is well.
-Michael Singer untethered soul- page 95
Wow! How can I speak to that piece of wisdom? In its perfect simplicity it tells us that peace is our own making. It isn't about making everything "out there" work perfectly in our favor. It is simply about being okay with things no matter how they turn out.
I learned the value of that wisdom Thursday. I was in a situation where I was originally determined to do more than break even for some monetary losses incurred because of events that were beyond my control. During the hours I sat there, I made a decision to put away my struggle to make a point for peace; to put away my anger and resentment for forgiveness; to put away my desire for a secure future for the psychological release of letting go of the past and to put away my wish for more for just enough to pay off my debts and to assist my children in the small ways I have not been able to assist them for years.
I could have went further. I know that...I mean I really know that. I could have caused a lot of trouble for the other side. But something in me...told me to let go. Just let go. It wasn't any longer about "winning" and proving how right I was nor was it about losing. It was just about peace. I wanted peace more than anything.
Sure...I am no farther ahead in knowing how I will survive in the future but I will not owe and I will have helped my children in some small way...that is all that matters.
Isn't this the direction I truly wanted to go in? Am I not learning about what is really important? About the internal harm in grasping and clinging to things of form and the freedom that comes from letting go of our mental attachments to things?
I can't say I walked away feeling thrilled or excited as others seemed to want me to believe I should lol. I walked away feeling nothing really...not excitement, not a tremendous amount of relief, not hope or a sense of security that I thought I would walk away with....but...but...I also did not walk away with grief, anger, resentment, loss, fear, or worry. The thing is, I walked away psychologically unaffected by the outcome. That to me says it all...that to me shows how much I have grown and healed.
My peace is not determined by what happens around me or to me. Everything is okay as it is. Why? Because I am okay with everything.
How cool is that?
All is well.
Tuesday, December 4, 2018
Weeping or Rejoicing?
When the ego weeps for what it has lost, the Spirit rejoices for what it has found.
Sufi proverb
Do you see how wonderful loss is yet?
I can actually say, in all honesty, that I am grateful for my recent losses. I am grateful that I have lost some of my perceived physicality, my ability to work in a job I loved, my professional designation, my income, that sense of financial stability I once depended on, the recognition I once enjoyed and most importantly the sense of identification I had with these things.
Say what???
It was ego's weeping that brought me to the "inevitability of is..." as Tolle describes it. I have finally gotten to the point in my Life where I am no longer thinking, "No! This should not be." ...but..."It is as it is."
I see that these situations do not make or break my life. It is what my mind is saying about them that does that. I may not be able to control what life hands out but I can control what my mind says about it. I want a healthy relationship with my Life as it is right now in this moment. That is what is important to me. All the stuff ego sees as loss...is just that "stuff.' It is not my Life.
I would never have realized the insignificance of that stuff until I lost it. I would never have realized the importance of "being" over "doing" if things didn't happen the way they did. I would have still been stuck in ego dominated thinking and doing if Life didn't present what it did to me.
Life is not meant to make us comfortable. It is meant to challenge us. Life is unpredictable...nothing of this material world will last forever. Loss is inevitable. (Tolle, 2018). And it is all okay.
I choose to rejoice in what my spirit has found...the moment; rather than weep over what ego perceives as loss.
All is well
Eckhart Tolle (2018) Getting Beyond Thinking https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fgos7QmJ_DQ
Sufi proverb
Do you see how wonderful loss is yet?
I can actually say, in all honesty, that I am grateful for my recent losses. I am grateful that I have lost some of my perceived physicality, my ability to work in a job I loved, my professional designation, my income, that sense of financial stability I once depended on, the recognition I once enjoyed and most importantly the sense of identification I had with these things.
Say what???
It was ego's weeping that brought me to the "inevitability of is..." as Tolle describes it. I have finally gotten to the point in my Life where I am no longer thinking, "No! This should not be." ...but..."It is as it is."
I see that these situations do not make or break my life. It is what my mind is saying about them that does that. I may not be able to control what life hands out but I can control what my mind says about it. I want a healthy relationship with my Life as it is right now in this moment. That is what is important to me. All the stuff ego sees as loss...is just that "stuff.' It is not my Life.
I would never have realized the insignificance of that stuff until I lost it. I would never have realized the importance of "being" over "doing" if things didn't happen the way they did. I would have still been stuck in ego dominated thinking and doing if Life didn't present what it did to me.
Life is not meant to make us comfortable. It is meant to challenge us. Life is unpredictable...nothing of this material world will last forever. Loss is inevitable. (Tolle, 2018). And it is all okay.
I choose to rejoice in what my spirit has found...the moment; rather than weep over what ego perceives as loss.
All is well
Eckhart Tolle (2018) Getting Beyond Thinking https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fgos7QmJ_DQ
Monday, December 3, 2018
Sunday, December 2, 2018
Conflict must be resolved
Conflict must be resolved. It cannot be evaded, set aside, denied, disguised, seen somewhere else, called by another name, or hidden by deceit of any kind, if it would be escaped. It must be seen exactly as it is, where it is thought to be, in the reality which has been given it, and with the purpose in mind accorded it.
ACIM-W-333:1:1-3
I used to teach conflict resolution in my Communications class. When I asked the students, every year, if they thought conflict was good or bad in fostering a healthy team...most answered that it was a bad thing to be avoided at all costs. Of course, I would throw that line from Hamlet at them, nothing is either good or bad, but thinking makes it so. Then I would proceed to tell them basically the same thing the above excerpt from A Course in Miracles tells us. "Conflict must be resolved not denied or avoided."
Conflict is not only an expectant part of group dynamics but it is an expected part of Life. We can close our eyes to it, walk away from it, promise to deal with it later or call it something else...but we will never escape it if we do that. The only way to deal with a conflict or any less than desirable life event...is to go through it. Resolution is the key that allows us to do so.
Resolution begins with seeing the conflict for what it is, where it is. And of course...that is in our minds. We need to put it all out on the table, so to speak. Just recognizing conflict: "This side has a different way of seeing things than my side does...and that is preventing us, as a whole, from moving forward with one unified goal." ...is enough to start the resolution process and create freedom from it.
In our own minds...conflict might exist between what ego wants for us and what that wise part of us (God) wants for us. This conflict makes us feel uneasy, unhappy and we might squirm and wiggle our focus from it. We may run from it by numbing our minds or getting lost in superficial pursuits. The more we run, however, the bigger the conflict gets and the further away from reaching a unified goal we are.
Just by recognizing that there is a conflict...heck that there are two sides in our minds capable of disputing....is a big step toward resolution. When we recognize an ego self...lets call that side "Fear" and a true Self ("Love") we begin the process. Then when we recognize how they both want different things...we take another big step into resolving the problem.
By the time both parties sit down at the bargaining table and lay down their demands we are well on our way. It is only when we see the demands, however, that conflict gets dismissed. We see how futile and counter productive ego/fear's demands are and it is like...wow...why are we even bothering to try to negotiate with such absurdity? There really is only one side that makes sense.
So ego is respectfully dismissed from the table and the true goal..."peace, happiness, Joy" is re-established. This is conflict resolution. This is awakening. Hmm!
All is well!
ACIM-W-333:1:1-3
I used to teach conflict resolution in my Communications class. When I asked the students, every year, if they thought conflict was good or bad in fostering a healthy team...most answered that it was a bad thing to be avoided at all costs. Of course, I would throw that line from Hamlet at them, nothing is either good or bad, but thinking makes it so. Then I would proceed to tell them basically the same thing the above excerpt from A Course in Miracles tells us. "Conflict must be resolved not denied or avoided."
Conflict is not only an expectant part of group dynamics but it is an expected part of Life. We can close our eyes to it, walk away from it, promise to deal with it later or call it something else...but we will never escape it if we do that. The only way to deal with a conflict or any less than desirable life event...is to go through it. Resolution is the key that allows us to do so.
Resolution begins with seeing the conflict for what it is, where it is. And of course...that is in our minds. We need to put it all out on the table, so to speak. Just recognizing conflict: "This side has a different way of seeing things than my side does...and that is preventing us, as a whole, from moving forward with one unified goal." ...is enough to start the resolution process and create freedom from it.
In our own minds...conflict might exist between what ego wants for us and what that wise part of us (God) wants for us. This conflict makes us feel uneasy, unhappy and we might squirm and wiggle our focus from it. We may run from it by numbing our minds or getting lost in superficial pursuits. The more we run, however, the bigger the conflict gets and the further away from reaching a unified goal we are.
Just by recognizing that there is a conflict...heck that there are two sides in our minds capable of disputing....is a big step toward resolution. When we recognize an ego self...lets call that side "Fear" and a true Self ("Love") we begin the process. Then when we recognize how they both want different things...we take another big step into resolving the problem.
By the time both parties sit down at the bargaining table and lay down their demands we are well on our way. It is only when we see the demands, however, that conflict gets dismissed. We see how futile and counter productive ego/fear's demands are and it is like...wow...why are we even bothering to try to negotiate with such absurdity? There really is only one side that makes sense.
So ego is respectfully dismissed from the table and the true goal..."peace, happiness, Joy" is re-established. This is conflict resolution. This is awakening. Hmm!
All is well!
Saturday, December 1, 2018
Forgiveness
Without forgiveness is the mind in chains, believing in its own futility. Yet with forgiveness does that light shine through the dream of darkness, offering it hope, and giving it the means to realize the freedom that is its inheritance.
-ACIM -W-332:1:7-8
What does forgiveness mean to you? I was brought up to believe it was something that only came if one repented for their sins...and sins were horrible and evil things that we or others committed because we were inherently bad. Pretty gruesome , eh?
I don't think that way anymore. I see forgiveness simply as freedom, a freedom that comes from letting go of old perceptions and ideas, a letting go of fear. We were born free...just as our minds were born peaceful. This so called 'sin' was just all the 'wrong and busy thinking' we piled on top of that peaceful state and that led to fearful choices and behaviours. It darkened the light that is us. A change of mind is all the repenting we need to do.
Forgiveness is warm. Like a tear on the cheek. Nell: The Haunting of Hill House: Red Room Scene.
-ACIM -W-332:1:7-8
What does forgiveness mean to you? I was brought up to believe it was something that only came if one repented for their sins...and sins were horrible and evil things that we or others committed because we were inherently bad. Pretty gruesome , eh?
I don't think that way anymore. I see forgiveness simply as freedom, a freedom that comes from letting go of old perceptions and ideas, a letting go of fear. We were born free...just as our minds were born peaceful. This so called 'sin' was just all the 'wrong and busy thinking' we piled on top of that peaceful state and that led to fearful choices and behaviours. It darkened the light that is us. A change of mind is all the repenting we need to do.
Forgiveness is warm. Like a tear on the cheek. Nell: The Haunting of Hill House: Red Room Scene.
(Recycling my pics like crazy....need to get out and shoot some more lol)
All is well!
Friday, November 30, 2018
Conflict is sleep
Conflict is sleep, and peace awakening.
-ACIM-W-331:1:8
I just finished binging on The Haunting of Hill House. And like ...wow! Sure it was scary and I certainly jumped and screamed at certain points lol...but I was amazed at the wisdom in the story line. This whole idea that conflict is sleep and peace awakening was expressed so clearly. It really was a beautifully scripted allegory about how we are haunted by fear and shame and can be lifted from that when we awaken...when we confront our fears and see them for what they really are. Fear is a dream...(7)
We will all awaken eventually at death but we do not have to wait until then. We do not need to be haunted by the past and suffer our way through life as the Crane kids did. Nor do we have to "end it". We simply need to confront the ghosts that haunt us, accept the world that exists beyond what we can see or perceive with our bodily senses, look at time not as a linear line but as moments "falling like confetti" all around and embrace each of those moments.
I wasn't expecting to find so much of this "aha!' and so much light in a dark and scary movie said to terrify. lol Well done!
-ACIM-W-331:1:8
I just finished binging on The Haunting of Hill House. And like ...wow! Sure it was scary and I certainly jumped and screamed at certain points lol...but I was amazed at the wisdom in the story line. This whole idea that conflict is sleep and peace awakening was expressed so clearly. It really was a beautifully scripted allegory about how we are haunted by fear and shame and can be lifted from that when we awaken...when we confront our fears and see them for what they really are. Fear is a dream...(7)
We will all awaken eventually at death but we do not have to wait until then. We do not need to be haunted by the past and suffer our way through life as the Crane kids did. Nor do we have to "end it". We simply need to confront the ghosts that haunt us, accept the world that exists beyond what we can see or perceive with our bodily senses, look at time not as a linear line but as moments "falling like confetti" all around and embrace each of those moments.
I wasn't expecting to find so much of this "aha!' and so much light in a dark and scary movie said to terrify. lol Well done!
Wednesday, November 28, 2018
Autonomy or Suffering?
For all things we perceive are upside down until we listen to the Voice of God. It seems that we will gain autonomy but by our striving to be separate, and that our independence from the rest of God's creation is the way in which salvation is obtained. Yet all we find is sickness, suffering, loss and death.
ACIM-W-328:1:1-3
Wow! We got it all wrong, don't we? We are not going to find the 'salvation' we are looking for through striving, or by building borders around ourselves that separate and defend.
What is this salvation many of us seek? It is simply freedom from suffering. We think we need to do whatever we can to protect ourselves from the suffering life hands out. Do we not often believe that God is out to get us? So we separate and defend this 'little me' we believe is us from all potential villains. We build walls around it, throw our spears from it and from our fortresses we strive to own, attain, and have all the "things' of the world that will fill a hole in us. We mentally argue against our need for each other, the world and God thinking this argument will make us autonomous, strong and successful. It only makes us sick, suffering and victims of illness, loss and death. Is this the salvation we are looking for?
No!
Isn't what most of us want...if we really, really think about it...is just peace of mind and joy and happiness. Do we just not want to be free of fear and feel safe?
Well the good news is ...we can have this. We can be saved. This salvation, however, does not come from our fear induced argument that we need to protect ourselves from Life by separating from God and others. It comes from realizing that our perceptions are upside down. God isn't out to get us. We were not meant to suffer like this...we created all this nonsense in our minds so we can un-create it. We can change our perceptions. We can begin by realizing what God really wants for us.
It is Your Will that I be wholly safe, eternally at peace.
ACIM-W-328:2:3
All is well!
ACIM-W-328:1:1-3
Wow! We got it all wrong, don't we? We are not going to find the 'salvation' we are looking for through striving, or by building borders around ourselves that separate and defend.
What is this salvation many of us seek? It is simply freedom from suffering. We think we need to do whatever we can to protect ourselves from the suffering life hands out. Do we not often believe that God is out to get us? So we separate and defend this 'little me' we believe is us from all potential villains. We build walls around it, throw our spears from it and from our fortresses we strive to own, attain, and have all the "things' of the world that will fill a hole in us. We mentally argue against our need for each other, the world and God thinking this argument will make us autonomous, strong and successful. It only makes us sick, suffering and victims of illness, loss and death. Is this the salvation we are looking for?
No!
Isn't what most of us want...if we really, really think about it...is just peace of mind and joy and happiness. Do we just not want to be free of fear and feel safe?
Well the good news is ...we can have this. We can be saved. This salvation, however, does not come from our fear induced argument that we need to protect ourselves from Life by separating from God and others. It comes from realizing that our perceptions are upside down. God isn't out to get us. We were not meant to suffer like this...we created all this nonsense in our minds so we can un-create it. We can change our perceptions. We can begin by realizing what God really wants for us.
It is Your Will that I be wholly safe, eternally at peace.
ACIM-W-328:2:3
All is well!
Monday, November 26, 2018
Life Doing Life....
From judgment comes a world condemned. And from forgiving thoughts a gentle world comes forth...
ACIM-W-325:1:5-6
I don't even know where to begin. If I write from my heart right now it is going to be all frustration, resentment, doubt, fear mixed with hope, love, a desire to forgive and a desire to forget. If I write from mind right now it will be all story. If I write from the Observer of mind and heart, there will be just this simple reminder:..."Wow! A lot of learning going on. Don't forget you are not the so called 'problem', just the watcher of it. From that place there is no problem...just Life doing Life."
Hmmm! Right now that observation...is getting covered a bit by the turbulent weather of mind and heart...but if I ponder the sky/space beneath ...eventually I might come to know I am the sky beneath. The thoughts, feeling, story and situations are just passing clouds...that's all! Man ...I would like to know that right now...
All good!
Friday, November 23, 2018
Training the Wandering Mind
I cannot lose the way. I can chose to wander off a while, and then return.
(ACIM-W-324: 1:3-4)
I read this line in my ACIM lesson for today and it hit home. It spoke to not only finding our way down Life's many paths but I could also see it applying to meditation.
Wandering Away From Home
We can never actually lose this peaceful state that is within us for it is who we really are. We can, however, wander away from it at ego's urgings. We can allow our minds to become cluttered by mental modifications and a need for 'more' of something. We can grasp, and seek, and cling, and fight and defend our way along paths that take us away from this natural state. We can wander away from home.
But we will eventually return...that's a given...even if it isn't until we die. It is assured we will return to this peaceful state because it is home. Home is always there with its bright warm lights welcoming us back and we need do nothing but turn towards it and chose not to wander off any longer.
Meditation: A Training that Keeps Us in the Property Lines
I see meditation(and mindfulness) as practice, a learned thing, that will stop us from wandering off so we can eventually reap the benefits of being home.
Our desire to run off away from home/ truth/ our peaceful state leads to suffering...or Dukkha. Yet, like the animals we are, we are often compelled to seek more out there in a world we made up in our heads.
What can we do?
We can train ourselves to recognize that home is where we want to be and that wandering away causes pain.
Have you ever seen those electric fences used to train dogs who naturally like to wander off, following their five senses (especially the nose) in search of something 'more', to stay within the property lines? An invisible fence is created around the perimeter and guideposts are set up to let the dog know he is getting close to leaving home. The first sign of wandering is met with little white flags and the dog who is wearing a collar will hear a buzz when he gets close to that. Another buzz will go off in his ear when he goes beyond it and if he makes it to the actual fence he will get a gentle shock. (Believe me the gentle shock hurts a lot less than the impact of a vehicle would.) Eventually with enough practice the dog will learn to be aware of the signs and will avoid exposing himself to unnecessary suffering. He will learn that leaving this present state causes unnecessary discomfort.
He will begin to explore instead the yard he is in, finding all kinds of wonderful satisfying things there . He will discover that everything he needs is already where he is. He doesn't have to search; he doesn't have to wander or risk things like fast moving traffic that could damage or kill. He doesn't have to get lost. He doesn't need to be chained or tied, either. He can wander freely around home.
In meditation practice, we can remember that. We can remember that our peaceful state is here within us, going nowhere. Everything we need is here. We are already everything we need to be. Dashing through the busy traffic of our minds is not only dangerous but it can never give us what we truly want...what home provides.
Until we remember we want to be home, wandering off is going to happen. It is human nature. Our minds are so conditioned to followed our noses, our five senses, and ego's lead into thought and feeling. No big deal. We need to learn to expect that we will wander.
Training the Wandering Mind
The thing is we can train ourselves to stay home so we do not wander off into the illusionary world thought creates. We can learn to calm the mind-stuff.
It is not easy at first. Minds wander. We can, however, gradually learn to recognize the signs we are wandering off. We can begin by realizing that Life has already set up the perfect learning tool.
Maybe every minor discomfort we experience, every feeling of confusion and questioning as we step close to the end of property lines...are like the white flags and gentle buzzing offered to dogs. Maybe Life is signalling that we are getting close to straying from home. Many of us will ignore the white flags and the buzzes, so convinced that what we need is "out there.". We will keep going despite the buzzing in our ears.
We will walk right into the shocks offered by Life and suffer the sudden pain as circumstances and loss and illness gets zapped through our experiences. Still, after the shake of the head and the falling down, we may get back up to "push past it"...We will learn to endure it, ignore it, live with it...convinced that what we want and need is out there somewhere. We won't learn from the pain. We keep going.
Then some of us require getting struck my those fast moving vehicles before we realize that we do not want to suffer anymore. For many of us...it takes that sort of crisis or suffering to get us to turn and look towards home.
So to assist Life in the learning of these valuable lessons...we can practice meditation and mindfulness. We can learn to be present.
We will likely start with finding ourselves in full fledged suffering again and again as we begin a meditation practice. (We will keep hitting that fence and finding ourselves running terrified out into the noisy, busy, unsettling traffic). We retrace our steps. Eventually we learn to recognize the outer buzz of warning before we get there and next the inner buzz and then the white flag blowing gently in our mind's eye as we make our way back home.
In other words we begin to catch the mind wandering and then coming home step by step, practice after practice, "Oh I am going off again. " We keep wandering, keep recognizing the signs that we are wandering and we either chose to endure the fence or come back into home. That is what the practice entails...what the training requires.
Eventually, we realize that home is the place to be. We no longer need the fence or any of the reminders. There is nothing out there that we need or want to make us whole. Searching for it just causes unnecessary suffering. We settle where we are and find pure peace, joy and contentment. We can never lose the way because home is the way. Unlike the dogs we are not being confined against our wills...we are being freed to be who we really are.
Meditation can be like an electric fence that trains us to stay within the property lines of our natural state of being. It is all about awareness. The more we practice, the more we learn to observe the signs we are wandering off so we can come back home. Wander, come home...wander, come home...wander, come home... until we decide not to wander anymore, not to suffer anymore.
All is well in my world.
(ACIM-W-324: 1:3-4)
I read this line in my ACIM lesson for today and it hit home. It spoke to not only finding our way down Life's many paths but I could also see it applying to meditation.
Wandering Away From Home
We can never actually lose this peaceful state that is within us for it is who we really are. We can, however, wander away from it at ego's urgings. We can allow our minds to become cluttered by mental modifications and a need for 'more' of something. We can grasp, and seek, and cling, and fight and defend our way along paths that take us away from this natural state. We can wander away from home.
But we will eventually return...that's a given...even if it isn't until we die. It is assured we will return to this peaceful state because it is home. Home is always there with its bright warm lights welcoming us back and we need do nothing but turn towards it and chose not to wander off any longer.
Meditation: A Training that Keeps Us in the Property Lines
I see meditation(and mindfulness) as practice, a learned thing, that will stop us from wandering off so we can eventually reap the benefits of being home.
Our desire to run off away from home/ truth/ our peaceful state leads to suffering...or Dukkha. Yet, like the animals we are, we are often compelled to seek more out there in a world we made up in our heads.
What can we do?
We can train ourselves to recognize that home is where we want to be and that wandering away causes pain.
Have you ever seen those electric fences used to train dogs who naturally like to wander off, following their five senses (especially the nose) in search of something 'more', to stay within the property lines? An invisible fence is created around the perimeter and guideposts are set up to let the dog know he is getting close to leaving home. The first sign of wandering is met with little white flags and the dog who is wearing a collar will hear a buzz when he gets close to that. Another buzz will go off in his ear when he goes beyond it and if he makes it to the actual fence he will get a gentle shock. (Believe me the gentle shock hurts a lot less than the impact of a vehicle would.) Eventually with enough practice the dog will learn to be aware of the signs and will avoid exposing himself to unnecessary suffering. He will learn that leaving this present state causes unnecessary discomfort.
He will begin to explore instead the yard he is in, finding all kinds of wonderful satisfying things there . He will discover that everything he needs is already where he is. He doesn't have to search; he doesn't have to wander or risk things like fast moving traffic that could damage or kill. He doesn't have to get lost. He doesn't need to be chained or tied, either. He can wander freely around home.
In meditation practice, we can remember that. We can remember that our peaceful state is here within us, going nowhere. Everything we need is here. We are already everything we need to be. Dashing through the busy traffic of our minds is not only dangerous but it can never give us what we truly want...what home provides.
Until we remember we want to be home, wandering off is going to happen. It is human nature. Our minds are so conditioned to followed our noses, our five senses, and ego's lead into thought and feeling. No big deal. We need to learn to expect that we will wander.
Training the Wandering Mind
The thing is we can train ourselves to stay home so we do not wander off into the illusionary world thought creates. We can learn to calm the mind-stuff.
It is not easy at first. Minds wander. We can, however, gradually learn to recognize the signs we are wandering off. We can begin by realizing that Life has already set up the perfect learning tool.
Maybe every minor discomfort we experience, every feeling of confusion and questioning as we step close to the end of property lines...are like the white flags and gentle buzzing offered to dogs. Maybe Life is signalling that we are getting close to straying from home. Many of us will ignore the white flags and the buzzes, so convinced that what we need is "out there.". We will keep going despite the buzzing in our ears.
We will walk right into the shocks offered by Life and suffer the sudden pain as circumstances and loss and illness gets zapped through our experiences. Still, after the shake of the head and the falling down, we may get back up to "push past it"...We will learn to endure it, ignore it, live with it...convinced that what we want and need is out there somewhere. We won't learn from the pain. We keep going.
Then some of us require getting struck my those fast moving vehicles before we realize that we do not want to suffer anymore. For many of us...it takes that sort of crisis or suffering to get us to turn and look towards home.
So to assist Life in the learning of these valuable lessons...we can practice meditation and mindfulness. We can learn to be present.
We will likely start with finding ourselves in full fledged suffering again and again as we begin a meditation practice. (We will keep hitting that fence and finding ourselves running terrified out into the noisy, busy, unsettling traffic). We retrace our steps. Eventually we learn to recognize the outer buzz of warning before we get there and next the inner buzz and then the white flag blowing gently in our mind's eye as we make our way back home.
In other words we begin to catch the mind wandering and then coming home step by step, practice after practice, "Oh I am going off again. " We keep wandering, keep recognizing the signs that we are wandering and we either chose to endure the fence or come back into home. That is what the practice entails...what the training requires.
Eventually, we realize that home is the place to be. We no longer need the fence or any of the reminders. There is nothing out there that we need or want to make us whole. Searching for it just causes unnecessary suffering. We settle where we are and find pure peace, joy and contentment. We can never lose the way because home is the way. Unlike the dogs we are not being confined against our wills...we are being freed to be who we really are.
Meditation can be like an electric fence that trains us to stay within the property lines of our natural state of being. It is all about awareness. The more we practice, the more we learn to observe the signs we are wandering off so we can come back home. Wander, come home...wander, come home...wander, come home... until we decide not to wander anymore, not to suffer anymore.
All is well in my world.
Thursday, November 22, 2018
Peace Again
And we are at peace again, for fear is gone and only love remains.
-ACIM-W-323:2:4
The natural state
According to Patanjali as well as other great spiritual philosophies, peace is our natural state of being. The citta vrttis, or the modifications of the mind-stuff, disturb that peace. (Satchidananda, page 4)
Ego creates the mind stuff. We are peaceful until we let all that fear based ego thinking get in the way.
Control the rise of the mind into ripples
The Yoga Sutras tell us that we need to learn to slow those old minds of ours down enough, so we can see beyond the dust they create, to who we really are. Patanjali taught that by controlling the rising of the mind into ripples, we can experience this connection with our natural selves again. It will involve practice. That is what yoga is, what meditation is, what mental control is, what mindfulness is...a practice. It is a practice that takes us back to a mind freed of all the grasping, the anxiety, the doubt that fear creates. Slow down!
What part of us needs to practice?
But if who we really are is already peaceful why do we need to practice these things? It is the image you or the ego-you that does all the Yoga practice. not the real you.(page 222)
It is good to know that beyond this busy tormented mind, there is peace, there is joy and there is love.
All good!
-ACIM-W-323:2:4
The natural state
According to Patanjali as well as other great spiritual philosophies, peace is our natural state of being. The citta vrttis, or the modifications of the mind-stuff, disturb that peace. (Satchidananda, page 4)
Ego creates the mind stuff. We are peaceful until we let all that fear based ego thinking get in the way.
Control the rise of the mind into ripples
The Yoga Sutras tell us that we need to learn to slow those old minds of ours down enough, so we can see beyond the dust they create, to who we really are. Patanjali taught that by controlling the rising of the mind into ripples, we can experience this connection with our natural selves again. It will involve practice. That is what yoga is, what meditation is, what mental control is, what mindfulness is...a practice. It is a practice that takes us back to a mind freed of all the grasping, the anxiety, the doubt that fear creates. Slow down!
What part of us needs to practice?
But if who we really are is already peaceful why do we need to practice these things? It is the image you or the ego-you that does all the Yoga practice. not the real you.(page 222)
It is good to know that beyond this busy tormented mind, there is peace, there is joy and there is love.
All good!
ACIM-Workbook
Satchidananda, Sri Swami (2011) The Yoga sutras of Patanjali. Yogaville; Integral Yoga Publications
Monday, November 19, 2018
Sunday, November 18, 2018
Offering Whatever Talents We Have
Use the talents you have. You will make it. You will give joy to the world. Take this tip from nature: the woods would be a very silent place if no birds sang except those who sang best.
-Bernard Meltzer (Brainy Quotes)
What is your special talent, the one thing you can offer the world that will bring it joy? Do you openly express it or are you held back by your social story? How do you react to others and how does this prevent you from doing the thing you do that makes you...you? I am wondering if my social/writing story relates to yours in anyway?
Awkward
After much practice, learning and confronting my fears I can now stand up and speak in front of 600 people without a quiver in my voice but I am still a bit awkward in social situations. I avoid 'exposure' of my vulnerability, of my 'broken' parts for fear of scrutiny and judgment. The egos of other people, frankly, scare the crap out of me. :)
I tend to stand back and a little away from other people. When I do approach or share in a 'social forum' my speech is often flushed, rushed and/or backwards lol. I may stutter or stammer or say something I shouldn't have said. The image I create is far from what I feel I am and wanting to protect that sense of self from egos that I fear can do so much damage, I pull back even farther.
It is much easier, I discovered, to appear aloof and distant...to step back and away...to become a lone-wolf or a wall-holder-upper rather then the center of attention. If anybody notices my retreat, I then become in other opinion...someone who is too 'stuck up' or 'too into herself' to care about others. Of course, that is not the case but who am I to argue with social opinion?
Social Story
That has been my social story for as long as I can remember (for almost 50 years). If I feel I have something important to say though, something that goes beyond my ego or the egos of others, something that has the potential to heal...I will step out there into the spotlight. I will let whatever is in me, beneath all my conditioning, my fear and my shame, to do what it has to do. It is almost like I have no choice. Something bigger than my fear and my shame takes over. Potential 'exposure to scrutiny and judgment ' seems like such a trivial and insignificant risk at those times. I am not held back. Thus my ability to public speak, to teach and to write the things I write. I do not seek ego fame and fortune through these mediums...I seek release. They truly are beyond me. I don't call it 'talent' as much as I call it a need to offer and share.
Offering and Sharing
This blog and my other writing has been like a high school dance for me. For the most part I lean against a wall in the back of the room. I may appear distant and aloof but part of me does want to connect. From that protective spot I shout out all the things I want to say. I remain unseen and unheard. It's safe and comfortable to be hidden away (little readership)but at the same time I get the release I long for. I'm okay with being the least popular kid in the room as long as I can write.
Every now and again, though, the thought that I need to get out of my comfort zone and connect pulls at me. So gingerly and hesitantly, I step out to the center of the dance floor in order to increase readership. There are soooo many kids on the floor, many of them prettier, smarter, and much more popular than me. Still... I introduce myself. I stutter and stammer as I do. I feel myself blushing and trembling. I feel extremely uncomfortable.
Few even stop to pay attention to my awkward introduction and the ones that do stand there with their hands on their hips and their heads titled to the side saying "What the Front door?"
Awkward!
I want nothing more, at these times, then to retreat back into the shadows. I want to run away but if I feel what I have to say needs to be heard...that 'thing within me' takes over. I have no choice but to stand where I am and do my thing. I don't look to see who is giving me the thumbs up or down. I don't speak to the egos in front of me, I speak to what is beyond them. Awkwardness slips away and this part of me slips out to express Itself.
When I have said what needs to be said...I gingerly and hesitantly walk back to hold up the wall again. It is only then, there in the darkness away from the scrutinizing eyes of others, that I check to see if I have been heard. Has my readership increased? Has a publisher or agent found merit in my work? Have I been understood and accepted?
The Outcome is not your problem
Hmmm! So far I remain an 'unknown.' I mean I do receive a thumbs up every now and again through publications and bumps in readership or comments and I am grateful for them. They keep me going. But for the most part, in high school popularity terms, I am not being seen and heard despite the effort it takes to go beyond the comfort zone.
The question is: am I okay with that? I think I am. I think as long as I can release this thing inside me out onto the page it's all good. As long as I try every now and again to step out of my comfort zone to be heard by someone its all good. I guess it is not my role to get all hung up on the outcome. I just need to write, and then step out there and attempt to connect that writing to an audience every now and again. When I do, I have done my job, regardless of how socially awkward I may feel. The rest is not up to me. :)
Moral
So what is the moral of this big long rampage? Comfort zones are okay for awhile, especially when you are creating, but after you create whatever it is that makes you... you...than at least try to share it. Step out away from safety and offer what you have to the world. What others do with it is not up to you. The opinions others have of you are not yours to own. And the outcome of anything you pursue is not your responsibility. Creating and sharing is.
All is well in my world.
Friday, November 16, 2018
Awareness: The Essence of Meditation
The essence of meditation is awareness. Awareness is like space and space can not be changed by clouds. Beautiful clouds, ugly clouds, dark clouds or bright-can not change space.
-Mingyur Rinpoche
In a lecture to potential meditators in London, Buddhist Monk Mingyur Rinpoche explains the practice of meditation through his own story of dealing with childhood panic, explaining how to meditate and by offering the audience exercises to practice.
These are some of the key points I gathered from that lecture:
What Meditation and Awareness are:
Four trouble shooting remedies in practice:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ukTaodQfYRQ
All is well!
-Mingyur Rinpoche
In a lecture to potential meditators in London, Buddhist Monk Mingyur Rinpoche explains the practice of meditation through his own story of dealing with childhood panic, explaining how to meditate and by offering the audience exercises to practice.
These are some of the key points I gathered from that lecture:
What Meditation and Awareness are:
- The essence of meditation is awareness.
- We are all aware
- Awareness is always there. The problem is we sometimes get lost in mental activity: thought, feeling, sensation and activity that we do not see it
- These things can cover the "space" like clouds or turbulent weather but awareness is still there unchanged behind them
- The practice of meditation involves recognizing and tapping into that space, that awareness again and again.
- One moment we are mindful and the next we are lost...we bring ourselves back to a state of being aware of being aware. Then we forget again and go off. We bring ourselves back to that awareness of being aware. It is a constant process of going from not being aware, to be being aware that we are not aware, to being aware we are aware.
- Back and forth and back forth until the little moments of awareness, of space become longer and longer...until awareness opens up into something grander bit by bit.
- It is a slow, mundane and sometimes boring practice of training the mind to recognize awareness...when we are aware of awareness.
- It is the formation of a new healthy, life enhancing habit
- As long as we can see a river (the mind) flowing past us we know we are not in it. If we were in it, we wouldn't see it and we would be swallowed up by it. We wouldn't want to be swallowed up by a dirty turbulent river would we? (Most of our monkey minds are such rivers). If we were going to fall into the river and we all will...from time to time...we want to make sure that river is calm so we can float along. Meditation helps to create a calm river...a calm mind.
- Don't resist anything!
- We must not resist thought, feeling, sensation or experience when we practice meditation. We must welcome and allow anything that is in our experience into our practice.
- He relays how he overcame severe panic attacks by welcoming panic without judgment...simply allowing it and being curious and interested in the sensations it provided...from a place of awareness.
- These intense emotional experiences that we sometimes judge as 'negative' can be powerful teachers, friends and supporters of our practice. Resisting them makes them persist. Befriending them makes them interesting things to learn from before they leave us...and they will.
- He explained that many of us misunderstand meditation and see it as a practice where we try real hard and we resist stress and negative emotion, call on breath and "Peace" to bring out relaxation...when it is not about struggle or resistance at all
- The more we resist the more whatever we are resisting persists
- 'Meditation can take place anywhere at and time even in the city'...it is just about bringing attention back to awareness
- He kind of made fun of the way I and other westerns sometimes meditate...with hands in Guyan mudra chanting peace or other mantras or focusing on breath. He just stressed that meditation doesn't have to be that structured or challenging.
- He said 'trying' and resisting just makes it more difficult to connect with our awareness of awareness
- He doesn't speak of breath awareness as so many practises do...I assume...and I can only assume...that is because of his panic ( and possible ADHD?) as a child. I can see body sensation would be an easier focus in those situations where awareness of breath may increase these feelings???
- He also closes eyes where other Buddhist teaching recommend opening the eyes and focusing on a spot in the visual field about 12 inches down from the tip of the nose( a form of Trataka from the yoga tradition?)
- I guess the key thing is then...do what works for you.
- If we simply make meditation about becoming more aware at any time or anywhere...it becomes so much easier (He does not use the term mindfulness)
- He encourages meditating in the beginning on body sensation...just becoming aware of sensations in the body from head to toe.
- He also says it is good to listen to sound...Buddhist bells in particular.
- The preferred way will depend on the individual but going back and forth between the two ways is recommended so one doesn't get bored
- Accept all emotional experiences
- don't try to relive a past experience that was joyful...past is past...create new experiences
- Remember that failure is a good thing...it is 'the mother of success'
Four trouble shooting remedies in practice:
- Watch: watch the sensation in the body, simply be aware of it
- Try Something Different: Change focus if necessary. If you find you can't settle with sound try body sensation and if body sensation becomes a problem because of the areas of concern you are focusing on...try focusing on a neutral part of body
- Step Back: mentally from the object of focus...become aware of what is watching it. Observe the observer
- Take a break: if it is still too much of a struggle to meditate which it should never be...take a break from it. Try physical exercise.
- Can be experienced as a physical sensation: top of head, tingling down spine or warm spreading sensation in core
- Can be experienced with extrasensory perception...light and colour etc
- Can be experienced as sensing energy around us from other people or things
- Or it can be experienced as being on an emotional roller coaster
- Experiencing this does not make us special, enlightened, wiser than the next...nor does it mean we are going crazy
- It is a normal response to effective meditation practice
- Need to recognize when we experience it...an indication we are opening up
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ukTaodQfYRQ
All is well!
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