You do not need to waste your time doing those things that are unnecessary and trifling. You do not need to be rich. You do not need to seek fame or power. What you need is freedom, solidity, peace and joy. You need the time and energy to share these things with others.
Thich Nhat Hanh.
As is the way with synchronicity, the events of yesterday and today, one by one in some perfect order I will never be able to understand, have lead me to that quote, to wise words that would resonate within me with a lovely reminder of truth. I have been wasting my time, precious time, that I am not sure how much I have left of on the unnecessary and trifling. Again that feeling of "running out of time...need to get the "important" things done", has entered my experience. ( As it has many times in the past...and I am still here lol). I have been spending precious life energy worrying about my finances, among other things and struggling to attain some type of readership. Why?
Wanting Freedom
I do not need riches...just sustainability. I do not need fame ...just to know that what I am doing is reaching its target. I do not need power...just a sense of safety and security....but maybe even this is "unnecessary and trifling"? I know what I truly need...what we all truly need is that freedom from suffering brought on by our by our minds, our ego's need to gain power and control, to create drama, to react, to stuff down all that is unpleasant and to cling so desperately to all that is pleasant creating one big knot of tangled up life experiences to process through.
I want to be knot free. I want that freedom, more than I want my financial situation to rectify itself, more than I want material wealth of any kind. I want that freedom more than I want publication or readership, more than I want any type of control or power over Life. That is why I am here...doing what I am doing. Yet, I keep slipping back into ego's world of collecting grievances, resisting what is and making a mess of things inside, if not outside too.
Yesterday, as I was walking, I had a taste of this freedom. It came about spontaneously, without any effort from me. And it was lovely. I was free. I was solid. I was not only experiencing peace and joy, I was peace and joy??? Bizarre really. As soon as I got home it slipped away and I was back in busy, reactive mind that was so desperate to make sense of my overly busy world again.
Freedom from the Heavy Personality
Upon listening to Eckhart Tolle this morning talk about how we need to forgive in order to finally reach enlightenment he said something that reminded me of what I was experiencing yesterday...He was talking about this happening in terms of our relating to people who we had grievances against but it also applied to my experience yesterday. It is like suddenly we are freed from the heavy personality and something deeper shines through...you have become conscious. In those moments, I was freed from personality and my personality lately was the size of a bull elephant. It was hard to carry around. In those moments of walking,I wasn't lost in "me"...there was this feeling of "lightness"...a feeling of being lighter and being light-er. Something came through.
Two Dimensions: Wave and Water
Then...in the series of events that lead up to the point I read the above quite, I was listening to Thich Nhat Hanh, in Fear, explain the two dimensions of reality, of Life. He said there is a historical dimension and an Ultimate dimension. Historical dimension is, of course, our story, the past we have collected and the future we are anticipating. It is full of beginnings and endings, comings and goings, beings and non beings, highs and lows. We can compare this dimension to a wave on the ocean...with a crest and a trough. Sometimes that wave is high and and sometimes it is low...sometimes we can barely see it. This wave sees itself as separate from all other waves and from its Source. Because of that , it fears the ups and downs, the comings and the goings...It doesn't know what will happen next so its afraid of the future and is afraid of the past that may have affected its perspective.
We are this wave when we are lost in ego mind...when we are lost in an idea of self.
The wave is riding on a vast ocean of water. That water is the Ultimate dimension, is everything that is. In its depth is this freedom, solidity, peace and joy we all really want There is no comings and goings, no births, no deaths, no highs or lows. That water on the surface manifests itself in so many waves. Each wave, however, is that water. The water is in the wave without the ideas and beliefs that it is separate or alone. It is only the wave that creates those notions, not the water. The water knows what it is. The wave doesn't.
The trick is for the wave to see that it is the water. We first must do that by practicing in this historical dimension...seeing how mind works clearly, recognizing and living with the duality. We observe everything, allow everything even the fear that is so much a part of this dimension. We observe it all. Then we fall back into the water that we are, and from there we observe again, this time as water, instead of wave. The duality disappears and so does the fear.
Hmmm! How beautiful is that?
So once again I am sharing my puny little experience to emphasize to you and to me...what I am learning about truth, about Life. I hope, though, you are able to observe your own life and discover this wisdom for yourself.
All is well.
Thich Nhat Hanh ( nd) Fear:Essential Wisdom For Getting Through the Storm. . Audio book. Spotify
Eckhart Tolle (May, 2022) How Not Forgiving Can Delay Your Awakening. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wcn5uIZBqXU
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