Is Illness Real?

We are not victims of aging, sickness and death.  These are parts of scenery, not the seer, who is immune to any form of change. The seer is the spirit, the expression of eternal being.
-Deepak Chopra ( Brainy Quote)

Over the last few weeks I have not been feeling physically well and I once again began to question this idea, that sickness is just an illusion.  It doesn't feel like much of an illusion yet the idea that it may be, wracks me with guilt.  Why am I experiencing illness that is limiting my life  if it isn't real?  What is wrong with me? Am I delusional or looking for secondary gains? Isn't what others see and say more important than what I feel?

The emotional component and the story associated with my experience of illness s is  often much worse than the actual physical symptoms. I do what others tend to do in such situations.  I seek validation...an answer that makes my story real.

Looking for the Validation of Story

In an attempt to understand what the body is doing we often seek a label, a name and some form of validation, do we not? 

I have spent many unsuccessful and shame inducing years attempting to get one solid diagnosis from medicine for what was going on in my heart (and the hearts and vessels of family members).  I or "it" was questionable in the eyes of others. So I collected past evidence to verify the plot.  That didn't seem to matter in changing the opinion of others, no matter how I relayed it. Past, then,  was insignificant in the 'naming' of this story.

I couldn't project the validity of my story into my future either  without a label. (With no diagnosis, there is no prognosis) .  I therefore couldn't build any story around it that I could identify with. My future story would remain a script unwritten.

I am actually grateful it turned out the way it did.  Because I did not succeed, I had to seek alternative means of coping with my perceived experience. This led me away from my psychological dependence on labelling, other validation, and story building that often comes with the experience of not feeling 100%. 

It actually led me back to the now and to  experiencing the body, mind and soul in each moment. I have come to see it all as a story that isn't significant or even all that real

So illness isn't real?

No 'illness' isn't real.  "Diabetes, Cancer and Heart Disease" are not real. "Arthritis, Colitis and sciatica" are not real.  "Illness" isn't real.

Say what??? I can see what is happening in my body...it is real.

Your symptoms  are real.  You feel what you feel. 

The signs may be real. Maybe you or others see, hear, smell, taste, or feel what is going on in your body that validate it is no longer in balance. That part is real.

The reality of the illness is only what you experience in the moment (Tolle)

Right now your glucometer may be  showing you that your  blood sugar is sky high or you are experiencing the wooziness of a low blood sugar because you forgot to eat after you took your insulin. That is real.

Right now you may be feeling a mass  somewhere on your flesh as you and your physician view some big dark spot on a Radiology report.  That is real. 

Right now you may be experiencing chest pain and shortness of breath as the ECG attached to you shows changes.  That too  is real.

Yes signs and symptoms can be real.  Your body is subject to the wears and tears of Life just as your mind is.  It will occasionally breakdown, mutate and disintegrate like all things of the physical world have the tendency to do.  Those changes in the body can be observed by the body (yours and/or someone else's).  What your body is experiencing right here in this moment is indeed  real.....

However, the 'diagnosis' and the determination of ' illness' isn't real.

Why "Illness" isn't real.

Illness isn't real because it is just a mental concept that exists in past and future. It is just a word that does not have the capability (as no one word does)  to adequately explain 'experience'. Illness is just a label. It is not the experience that is being labelled.

When we present with our so called body imbalances, signs and symptoms get grouped together by well meaning professionals. By using some diagnostic manual, a name is often given to them. That name then determines the course of treatment and the prognosis. Individual experience is not a part of that.

The name is what we tend to get hung up on.  The name is what we build our stories around using past memory and experience...and future  expectations. We go from experiencing the individual body...to playing out a script in our heads created by a collective thought.

These diagnosis' are just mental concepts...words and images attached to a series of signs and symptoms experienced by a body.  They are  pointing fingers pointing to a physical body which simply houses who we really are. We don't seem to look past the finger.


What we do with these mental concepts that really make us sick.

With the mental constructs we create an image that explains  our symptomology and that provides some relief to ego's need to know. Unfortunately, it also takes us from experiencing our moment.

We get hung up on past and future. We use the use past experiences of others to create a mental story in our mind of what that word "means". We identify with past (why I got this and what happened to others who had this), future (what will happen to me) and the so called 'disease' becomes our Life story.  It becomes a story in our minds that we too often live out, a story passed on by the collective and documented experiences of others who also  seen it as a story about them.

Cancer, for example, is only a word...yet it has the potential to cause great fear and grief in us.  It already has a pervasive story built around it. It is that  story built around the the word we fear. not the individual experience of cancer moment to moment.

We never want to see someone plopping that word above our group of symptoms or the symptoms of someone we love, do we?  If that word is used in anyway to describe us we automatically build more  story around it, don't we?  We go directly to our heads and  back to our memory banks to recall others who had that label placed on them.  We believe the story; we become the story!!!

We are told by well meaning professionals who use past survival statistics to determine our prognosis what our chances are. We believe them.  We believe the story our mind is telling us.  We get lost in past and future. And we truly believe we are going to suffer  and spend all our life energy unsuccessfully  'fighting death' because of one word. The real tragedy isn't the experience of so-called  cancer here but our reaction to a word, a label, a name.

Victims of words

We make  past stories associated with a mere word, our story. We identify with those stories and live in past and future.  Instead of seeing and experiencing the symptoms as they occur in each moment, we identify with the label.  We become it. "I am a diabetic.  I am a cancer survivor or a chemo patient.  I am a cardiac patient."  We become the illness and therefor the victim of a 'word'.

What we fail to accept is that diagnosis'  are just words and maps made by the collective professional mind. They cannot be who we are.  We just 'believe' they are.

How do we get beyond the limiting belief in Illness.

We can start by realizing who we are. I mean...who we really are.  Catch yourself referring to an illness label  using "I am".  Remind yourself you are not an illness.  You are not the body.  These things are just scenery. You are so much more.  You are the seer. You are the awareness that watches the blood sugar or the ST waves fluctuate on the machines.   You are not the label, the disease, the bodily changes. Who you are is beyond a mere concept of disease...it is 'nameless, eternal and unchanging.' (The Tao)

Drop the label.  We do not have to identify with the disease we are labelled with do we?  By all means treat it in the ways you see fit but don't become it. If you feel you need to address it, instead of saying, "I am diabetic", simply focus on the symptoms.  " I have high blood sugar according to this machine so I take insulin."

Don't personalize it. Watch those pronouns: "My" and "Mine".  This group of symptoms does not belong to you.  It isn't something the universe is doing to you.  It is just a breeze that is blowing through you just as a different type of breeze may blow through someone else.

Don't build story around your experience. Be aware of that tendency of the mind to remove us from our 'experience' and take us into story. It wants you to see yourself as a victim or a hero to your disease. It wants the drama and the ownership of it.  Try to recognize when it is becoming a story...when you are building a past and future around it, constantly talking about your condition to yourself or others, seeking specialness,  or staying stuck in your mind.  Gently bring yourself back to the present experience.

Experience the now.  The only reality to illness is what you experience in this moment, right here , right now. Be willing to accept and allow this moment no matter what it offers in terms of physical experiences. Put down the past and future concepts and live in the now. Instead of focusing on your past and the past of others who had similar signs or symptoms, bring awareness back to the present moment.  What are you experiencing now? Are you having pain now?  Experience it. (of course...treat it if it is interfering with your Life experience) but experience it. Even if you agree to  having  a label like arthritis stuck to you for treatment purposes ...it doesn't mean you have to experience pain all the time.  That is just a belief.  Symptoms may come and go.  What happened in the past may not be happening now and just because it is happening now, doesn't mean it will continue into the future.  As a nurse, I have seen the consequence of 'anticipated pain' in patients...the fear of it prevented them from enjoying their pain free moments. So stay in the present. There is no other Life but right here, right now.

Determine what your body might be trying to tell you. There is no doubt in my mind that the physical body reacts to what is going on in the mind.  Therefore I believe all so called disease is in some form or another...psychosomatic.  I know what I am experiencing is psychosomatic.  I am finally okay with that.  We need to be okay with that so we can get back to what the bodily symptoms are really trying to tell us.  There is an important message in that physical experience.  It is trying to tell you there is something in your 'thinking', your 'believing' and your 'perceiving' that needs to be looked at. We may need some  mental health professional or alternative practitioner like an energy healer to help us with that one.

Be Grateful.  That's a hard one, eh?  How can we be grateful for feeling so rotten or for witnessing how our lives are effected by these symptoms?  Remind yourself that Life knows what it is doing.  Everything that seems to 'happen' to us is for a reason we may not be able to understand at this point...but we will eventually.  It will all make sense someday. 

In the meantime be grateful for how you are being led to something greater...that something that lay beyond the body and mind.  So called 'Illness" can actually  be a portal to awakening.

How cool is that?

All is well!

References

Legge, James. (1891)  Translation of the Tao Te Ching. Retrieved from https://www.sacred-texts.com/tao/taote.htm

Tolle, Eckhart. (March, 2019) Eckhart Talks Real Versus Perceived Limitations. Retrieved from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=30Qtgduxqxg