Got a match? I got a leech on me.

Feed your own ego, I'm busy.
-Kushandiwisdom


I know I occasionally go on and on about my readership or lack of but believe me that behaviour is not intended to induce pity from you or from myself.  I am just trying to understand how to do what I feel so compelled to do.  :) I want to reach people...it doesn't have to be many.  As I said before I will continue as long as I am making a difference in one person's life...even if that person is me. lol.  Not ego but something much greater is driving me.  I am not saying that ego isn't present because it is still  my  noisy and annoying back seat driver on this ride.

Ego got another little burn. I suddenly received a number of viewers over the last few days and I was excited.  I thought I was connecting to a larger audience again (getting 25 + a day...which may not seem like much to some but it makes a perfect class size for me:))....I was getting what I wanted to say out there.  I was confident that of all the new readers I "seemed" to be getting, there would be 2-3 who would really "get it" and benefit from it.  My teaching and learning desire would be supported. 

I decided to check out the new, much appreciated site that seemed to be "following" this blog.  It turned out to be, as shocked as I was, a sex site...connected to me (I assume...and we all know we should not assume)  via the yandex redirect that showed up a few months ago. I was floored, embarrassed that I let ego get inflamed again, and angry.  I am not judging the site or those who use it....I am just upset that this site and me, who is practicing continence in Brahmacarya Yama (look it up lol), is so not fitting with the message of that site.

It also tells me that no one from that search link is reading.  I have been used as an unsuspecting travel host to carry leeches from one area of this vast cyber lake to the next.  These "leeches" ( such a strong word) do not mean to hurt me, just suck a bit of my blood and go a little distance using my body as the vehicle. It really is only ego that feels the sting of their bites....but I don't want to carry them.  Please get off.  :) Of course, that won't be read that because they aren't actually reading, just being carried.  Do leeches even have eyes?

It is all good.  It is exactly the way it is meant to be for now.  Eventually readership here or elsewhere will be doing what I intend it to do...reading lol. For now things are the way they are for my learning purposes.  I want to thank again the people I know who are reading this and for letting me know you are.  I also want to thank yandex redirect  for reminding me once again...that my ego still needs a bit of an anti-inflammatory.  Though it is shrinking tremendously...it is still a red and swollen hemorrhoid on my psyche.  Ouch! :)

All good!