The Difference Between Words

The difference between the right word and the almost right word is like the difference between lightning and a lightning bug.
-Mark Twain


I am still a little stuck on the limitations of the English Language as a symbol of the limitations of our western cultural conditioning. Get all that? :)

I am looking at the words "I have" in how they relate as a replacement for our distorted use of "I am."

Not to be used with doing

 Now when I use "I have" here in favorable terms...I am by no means recommending it as  a good choice for describing doing. When it comes to doing, I see it as a curse term synonymous with "should' and "must".  I absolutely hate to see it in forms like, "I have to do this."  "I have to go." etc.  No...it is yucky in that context. It denies the freedom of choice that each of us have internally. 

Replace "I am" with "I have"

The context I want "I have" to be used is simply in the replacement of "I am" when we identify with the perishable or temporary that diminish the "I am" potentiality. In other words...I would like to see us say, "I have a role as a nurse, doctor, writer...or whatever right now," instead of saying to ourselves and to the world, "I am a nurse, doctor, writer."   "I have feelings of frustration, anger, loneliness right now," instead of saying, "I am frustrated, angry, lonely." "I have pain right now," instead of saying, "I am sick or broken."  Does that make sense?

The Difference

What difference does it make to replace "I am" with "I have" there?  A lot. 

Firstly, when I say I am...it is like I am saying to myself and the world..."Look at me.  This is who I am.  This sickness, this emotion, this role...is who I am." It is a piece of me.

When I say" I have...", I am not identifying, not making what I have a part of me.  It is like I am holding this particular something in my hands and showing it to myself and the world. "Look at this.  This is what I have in my hands right now." The thing I have is separate from me...it is just something I am holding a part from me and experiencing with my five senses. It isn't "me".

Another difference is in permanence. In "I am"...whatever I am experiencing is deemed to be as eternal as I am. There is no temporary nature to it.  I am clinging and making things of this world something they are not.  For example, if I say "I am sick." it implies there is no end to it.  It is as if sickness is as much  a part of me as is my name or my eye colour.

I, however, use "right now", when I describe the experience of having, to bring us back into the moment, the only time there is.  In this moment...I have this or that. I may have pain but it will not last forever.  I just have it right now.  I may not have what I have now in the next moment but that is irrelevant.  Right now I have this or that. The use of "I have" shows that I recognize that things of the external world are temporary and fleeting.

The biggest distinguishing point between I am and I have is...is that in "I have" I express that I can put whatever I am holding down whenever I choose to, it is not a part of me...I don't have to amputate pieces of the Self if I decide to remove it.  I don't lose who I am when I set it on the ground and walk away.  If you are holding a heavy bolder in your hands and it gets heavy, what do you do?  You put it down and walk away.

If I use "I am" however...it equates to this understanding that part of me will be removed if I take this thing away. I will be less than. Even removing painful things like a heavy bolder or painful emotion may be resisted if we use these terms for fear of losing who we are in the process. If I am angry...I will cling to that anger in fear of the pain of amputation if I don't. There is a potential for loss and pain  in the inappropriate use of "I am" and much less in  in "I have".

Try this and see which one "feels" better for you.  "I am suffering"  or "I have suffering in my life right now."  ????

If we want to use language to detach from erroneous cultural beliefs, we need to change "I am" to "I have" when we describe roles, feelings or temporary experiences.  It will, I believe, eventually change the way we look at Self and look at Life.

More food for thought.

All is well.