You Have Enough

 

Samtusta, you have enough.

Thich Nhat Hanh

I have been thinking an awful lot about samtusta lately (once I remembered the name for this state of being completely satisfied with what is, that is :)). I truly see at some very deep level of understanding that it isn't where we are in life, what we are doing, who we are with, what we have or don't have...that makes us feel happy or not happy.  It is where we are "inside" that counts. We really do not have to make big changes in our lives, achieve this or that, get this or that, or put an end to all difficulty and challenge in order to feel satisfied. We simply need to be pure and clean in here.  It is not a "moral" cleansing that is required but a samskara cleansing. We need to remove those knots in the way of experiencing the peaceful flow of shakti through us. 

So, where ever you are at right now, whatever is happening around you, regardless of who you are with...regardless of how wonderful or how awful your mind is telling you it all is...instead of automatically running into "change"...stop, breathe , and look inward towards that which you are running from. Remind yourself you have enough. This satisfaction and awareness of enough is just buried under something that does not serve you. 

Everytime I feel the urge for "something different" or "more than this" lately, I stop, take a breath, and remind myself that I am wanting to run away from some samskara turbulence inside me.  I remind myself that runnng won't help if I end up just dragging this thing along with me. I tell myself to relax instead...and to feel and experience what is inside as unpleasant and counterintuitive to the mind it might be. Several layers of story related to that "feeling" may come up, including the story related to the trigger that seemed to have initiated the feeling. I tell myself that it is "just a story";  that is unnecessary to the healing process and what is important is the feeling trapped beneath it.  I go there to feel whatever is happening inside in my body first, than in my heart.  I gently encourage a movement upwards. As of late it seems to go only so far as my upper belly...but that is enough for now. Sigh!

Purification and healing in the truest sense  is quite a process.  It is going to take some time. When I get discouraged over the slow progress...I just remind myself of the beautiful state of being I am looking for: Samtusta...and then I keep going, knowing that I already have enough.

All is well.