Good Bye House

 Home is not a place. It is a feeling you carry with you wherever you go.

I am preaparing to leave this house I lived in for almost twenty years.  I am starting to grieve a bit.  I silently sent a thought of gratitude to it for the way it took me in at a difficult point in my life, wrapping its walls around me and my family, protecting us and keeping us warm and safe.  More than anything it became this amazing sanctuary for me to heal in.  I am so, so grateful for it! 

I didn't treat it well. I struggled with maintaining ownership of it since I first went off work sick in 2011. That was hard but I was determined to do what I could to keep a roof over my childrens' heads and somehow I did! I both hated it and loved it after that and it became a somewhat negelected partner.  I stopped caring for it the way I could have. Still, it was so forgiving.  It continued to be a sanctuary for me to begin awakening in.  I will miss this one spot in the house to which I became attached....the dining room with four windows that allow so much light to come in from either side. I wrote so much here.  I can see this amazing yard as I look out.  And that yard out there with the giant trees full of so much Life  that have become my friends. The peace and solace I found out there when things in her got tough, I have buried or spread the ashes of so many beloved pets, that once ran joyfully from corner to corner of it, under those trees, as well. They too have become a part of that yard  Oh God, the growth I have done here. So, so grateful!!

And I know it is time to fill it once again with the love it deserves.  Soon the floors will be echoing the pitter patter of little feet, the sound of childrens's laughters will be bouncing off its walls again. This house will embrace that young life, I know it will, and that life will embrace it. 

It is all good.

All is well.