An Attitude for Hard Work?

 It's not the load that breaks you down, it's the way you carry it.

Lou Holtz

This will likely be my last post in this house.  After a few days of extension on our self imposed deadline we will be out of here today.  Still have some cleaning to do here...spent 12 hours straight out yesterday with a 30 minute break in total cleaning and finishing the packing. I have been going full tilt since December first! 

It surprises me to realize that I actually enjoy hard physical labor! 

Say what?

It is such a big job but so far I loved putting my body to the task and am so appreciative of the way it is allowing me to. I know there is a bug under the surface percolating, waiting to emerge...D. said he was beginning to feel sick yesterday and headed for the bed...I too feel the throat and sinus thing...but my mind is directing my immune system with a big "Wait...wait until after this is done," and my immune system, so far, has been listening. My ticker too has not been protesting as much as it normally would with the amount of physicality required to do all this...mostly on my own.  

I kind have enjoyed this time working with myself.  I work well with "me" lol.  I like moving the body. I like having purpose.  Though cleaning beyond the basic requirements was always on the bottom of my priority list, I can clean...and I can even enjoy it. Packing is a little more challenging though but doable...obviously...being that everything but the bathroom is packed up. I do resent having to "direct" others to pack or help more which I found myself having to do with less success than I had hoped for.  When communicating my expectations for assistance honestly and openly doesn't spur others on...I just say..."I can fight that battle with them and allow a resentful ego in me take over or I can surrender to doing it myself." 

 I am impressed with how much I was able to "do". It is all attitude, isn't it? 

Anyway, will hopefully catch up with you soon. I may be almost finished here but I have a heck of a lot to do up there now. It will get done. Sigh! It will get done and then I can surrneder to whatever the universe has in store for this body and mind.

All is well

Overwhelmed

 

You can't calm the storm so quit trying. What you can do is calm yourself. The storm will pass. 

Timber Hawkeye

I felt so overwhelmed this morning when I woke up to D. taking a call for work. You see, we are supposed to be out of here tomorow and the house is still not ready for us to move in. We had planned on doing so much today. Sigh! After hours and hours of fixing and painting walls and trim...and it looked beautiful and bright...we noticed yesterday that the stackable washer and dryer will not fit through the very small 1960's doorway to the area that has been created for it. That means attempting first of all to remove the trim that has been on there since the build (and back then, for some reason, they used a heck of a lot more nails! so these things are really hard to remove. It will be messy)! If that doesn't solve the problem ...we will have to make the wall wider...which will create a whole bunch of more mess.  I cannot clean the main space and move everything in until that washer is moved into its assigned location.  We cannot move that until the entry is made bigger and until  D. fixes the electrical over there...which he attempted to do on three different visits only to discover the need for this or that which he did not have with him. He keeps forgetting one thing or another and the distance is too far just to "run back and get it".  I cannot clean in here until all this stuff that I keep tripping over is out of here. It is chaotic. And my poor old dog is just overwhelmed with the chaos. I still do not know what we are going to do about her...tried leaving the decision to D. ( technically she is his dog being that he brought the dogs here after his house got burnt down). I gathered everyone together on Friday to offer him feedback to help with that decision...but here we are.  No decision. It will be to make it, I guess, and I resent that being left to me as well as all the packing and cleaning...on top of all the reno work I do at the house we are moving in to. (I kept up with the guys, let me tell ya.) Anyway, as you can tell by my rambling I am overwhelmed and feeling a bit sorry for myself. Sigh! 

I came here to center again. Deep breath....in ....and a deep breath out. In...out...in....out.....

Okay...I can only do what I can do. What absolutely needs to be done to move...I will focus on that....leaving the rest when I am on there.    I will try cleaning around all this for now...maybe moving boxes and stuff out to the step if I have to.  ( If only the weather was cooperating...winter in Canada is not the time to move people!!)

I did not mean to use this as a venting board lol...but that is exactly what I did. Go figure.

All is well,

Embracing the Curriculum

 Embracing the Curriculum

Quietly I sit in this old familiar spot

sipping on the tea that refuses to stay hot.

I read, think, and write a bit in some demanding fever

to understand reality and to become a true believer.

Yet...no matter how many times I reheat this stupid cup

or type some deep, life changing and inspiring message up,

I can't seem to find the "aha" moment that makes it all sound right.

I just can't seem to relieve this mind that is always so uptight.

I guess I am hiding  from the reality 'that is' with every word I type.

I am hiding from the true curriculum in this "I am a seeker" hype.

The lesson is not in thinking or in explaining the life outside that door,

nor is it in getting lost in some practice, or by doing more and more.

The learning is found in being with each thing that painfully emerges from inside 

and facing the circumstances and reactions from which I tend to hide. 

Life, I'm told, will give me exactly what it is that I am meant to learn

and I will come to trust the teacher with every challenge badge I earn.

Each and every  moment is the lesson plan at play

and if I become a faith-filled student, I may graduate some day.

Dale-Lyn December 2025

Silly poem ...if you want to even call it that...quickly put together for whatever reason.  Don't judge the poem...it is "bad", I know...(I really feel embarrassed about putting this one up and that is why I know I must put it up!) Just take the message from it if you can. 

All is well

No Gifting!

It's not about the presents but it is about your presence. Therein lies the spirit of the holiday season.

Rahne E.

(Not sure about this name...it isn't the author of this quote...and I am not sure how it got here on this page.)

Christmas is coming and it is easy to get lost in the western version of this season that has been so conditioned into us. I am doing my best not to.  The busy distraction of the move and the other things that are going on around me helps to prevent me from getting sucked into that. To me...gifting for the sake of gifting has got to stop! It is not really a "healthy and wholesome" way to celebrate the birth (the date not so randomly selected  by Pope Julius's attempt to outstage the pagan "winter soltice" celebration) of one of the wisest beings who ever walked the planet. Is it? Sure...good will and charity...wonderful...but buying for the sake of buying...to me that just makes it a capitalist holiday, not a spiritual one. Sigh! 

Anyway, the kids and I agreed last year to collect for charity rather than gift each other. We will continue that new tradition this year.  I mean, we will have a little yankee exchange of a small amount and we will buy for the grandkids ( for now...hopefully that too will change in the future so the kids grow up understanding that "it isn't about the gifts!"). We are having a yankee exchange at my sister's tonight as well.  D. and I might fill each other's stockings with sundries but that will be all. That's it! No gifting!

We will see how that intention turns out.  

All is well!

Temporary Grounding

 In order to deal with the chaos that exists in the world today, you need some grounding. That grounding best comes from knowing who you are.

Michael Ray

It is almost as if this blog, this part of my practice has walls...comforting walls I can run behind when everything out here is as chaotic as it is right now. I get a glimpse of  and am reminded of who I am here. 

I am feeling less than grounded let me tell ya.  We have a few more days to be out of this house, and to clean it to make it move in friendly, a few more days to make and follow through with the decision for our beloved dog, a few more days to consider the commercially conditioned needs of Christmas ( I have no shopping done...I really, really am trying to move away from that version of Christmas but I want to buy for grandchildren and give where it is needed), a few more days to get two more blankets knitted for my grandchildren-  (The girls' blankets take sooo long to knit! And I have so little time to sit and knit), and more than a few more days to get to place where I can "ground" again. I really do feel "all over the place."

So,  why crazy lady ...do you feel the need to spend your limited time here?

I need to temporarily touch ground somewhere  as I float around in this chaotic space. I need to be reminded of who I am.

All good. 

Change

 Change is hard at first, messy in the middle, and gorgeous at the end.

Robin Sharma

Sorry been away from this trying to renovate a 1960 build in two weeks.  That is a big and massive process, especially since it was previously rented  by people who happened to smoke. Everything is yellow and brown. So, of course there is a thorough cleaning followed by a few coats of paint on each wall and ceiling.  That is the easy part. We have a combination of plaster/drywall thing going on so that means lots of cracks in walls and ceilings that had to be crackfilled and repaired. We are also remodelling the walls in a very tiny bathroom. I desperately wanted a new tub but the plumbing and the tearing down of walls just to get a tub into this tiny space is something we do not want to get tangled up in. I will refurbish teh tub instead. Since there are only a few small windows and I am a light lover...I also wanted to tear down a few walls to open up the space...but being the age it is, everywall in this house is a support wall. That will require more time and effort than we have. Will eventually make a lunch counter/pass through in the kitchen wall to compensate so light and space can flow but that will have to wait. There are so many things we are ignoring and putting on hold just to make our deadline, like the lead paint I am sure is still on the walls and the old wiring that has been in this house since the build, not to mention the fuse box panel it is attached to ( should be priority to replace that...I know!). We did remove what seemed like a giant washer from one wall and a giant dryer from another wall in another room that was taking up way, way too much of the limited space and have a stackable coming in to replace it that can be neatly tucked into a corner. That, however, means more wiring...yikes. Then there is the finishing of packing here and the moving of all that I am bringing with me...in hope that it will fit!! 

While we are preparing for the move my lovely old girl Roxy is suffering in her premature aging (she had Addison's all her life). It hurts her to move from spot to spot though she is so restless, she is constantly trying to move. It also looks like she has a squamous cell ca ( my guess...only) on her leg and possibly in her mouth and eye. She is anxious and in pain. I am not sure she will handle the move. So we have to make that awful decision dog owners hate to have to make. She is still eating some when we bring her her food and she is still wagging her tail when she sees us.  She is even semi-playful at times. This just makes the decision so much harder.  Is it time we step in and help her to pass on? I just do not want her to suffer and this move will be so hard on her.  Yet, I hate to let her go or be the one that makes the decision that her earthly time is over...but it will have to be me. Sigh!

We are also dealing with my grandson's issues. He is beautiful, fun-loving, and brilliant little kid who I suspected for a few years had some high functioning neurodivergent tendencies.  We were all perfectly okay with that ...so it didn't really matter if he got that diagnosis or label or if he didn't...until he went to preschool that is.  Now, it is obvious that there is something going on. He is completely overstimulated, overwhelmed and emotionally shut down while at school and acting out in all kinds of ways after school. Though he is a very articulate speaker with us, he has not spoken a word to one other student or teacher since he started in September and he does not interact or play with anyone except himself while there. The pictures the teachers often take for the parents show him tense and tight with shoulders up to his ears, and his arms tucked neatly into his side. His expression is as flat as the Saskatchewan prairie in each and every picture. (He laughs and smiles so much with us).  He is also regressing in basic developmental tasks like using the bathroom. His ticks ( sudden facial contortions and arm contractions are getting worse). The teachers I spoke to seem absolutely lovely and caring, but they keep telling us that "he is just shy" or they are unintentionally patronizing his mother by telling her how to parent. She has approached them many times in an attempt to make them understand he is in the process of being assessed but they keep responding  with, "Oh no, he is fine...you just have to do this or that as his Mom etc."So, obviously a label is now required so he gets the help he needs to cope with a school like setting. If he doesn't get one soon, I fear he will develop a trauma response to school and will withdraw even farther inside himself. The self he withdraws into is a bubble wrapped existence that includes his mother and her 100% attention. When he has that, he shuts everything and everyone out. If anyone or anything attempts to break into that bubble to divert his mother's attention elsewhere, he has an extreme resistance reaction. He tantrum's, screams, grabs her face or body part to get her to look at him, screams to be picked up etc.  He gets angry with anyone who gets between them in anyway.  He is not being "bad" or disobedient when he does this...it is sheer desperation and a need for safety causing this reaction. The world is too stimulating for him sometimes and he needs to pull into a safe spot in this bubble wrapped world as people with neurodivergent brains tend to do, with his mother and her full attention coming with him.  This whole thing just breaks my heart.  We had a confrontation yesterday with the staff over this and I am still reeling from all the emotions I picked up while there. 

Anyway, so I have that too and a host of other things I am dealing with ...on top of trying to move. Sigh!

We will get it done and I will soon be in my new spot breathing in the lead from the walls and being thrown across the room everytime I plug something into those ancient outlets. Luckily the space is so small I will only be shocked back a few inches before I hit another wall. Besides my heart feels a little tired these days. It may need a zap or two. :)

All is well!

The Truth Beyond the Optical Delusion of Consciousness

 Tat Tvam Asi  (You are that)

That is probably what  Uddalaka Aruni would tell us humans if he was still walking the planet in physical form observing so many of us feeling miserable, caught up in our me-me-ness, and making a mess of things. 

Long, long before Socrates was born to teach... sometime in the  8th-6th century BCE ...,,,there existed a rishi, a great philosopher,  a teacher of Oneness that walked what we know today to be India. He was responsible for writing one of the oldest Hindu texts- the Chandogya Upanishad from which that sanskrit term comes and later became the Samaveda. 

How can we non-Hindu westerns understand that phrase?

We can understand it by studying the words of  the greatest rishi in the world who came much, much later. Christ  was teaching the very same thing

My father and I are one John 10-30

We can also understand it by analyzing the findings of modern science. Nikola Telsa said, "We are all one. Only egos, beliefs, and fears separate us. "

Albert Einstein said, "A human being is a part of a whole, called by us "the Universe"- a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts, and feelings as something separated from the rest-a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness."

"Quantum physics thus reveals a basic oneness of the universe. " Erwin Schrodinger. 

Let's listen to both those who have studied in external laboratories, and those who have studied in the internal laboratories of the mind to discover this truth. 

Tat Tvam Asi

Or as Michael Singer often quotes, 

The purified mind is no different than the Self.

All is well!

Michael Singer/ Temple of the Universe/ Sounds True ( December, 2025) The Yoga of Wisdom: The Path to Liberation https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OHoi4u8jpMY&list=PLyOuAoSmZkKoESr2acNWwhznusbBkKXsT&index=1

Good Bye House

 Home is not a place. It is a feeling you carry with you wherever you go.

I am preaparing to leave this house I lived in for almost twenty years.  I am starting to grieve a bit.  I silently sent a thought of gratitude to it for the way it took me in at a difficult point in my life, wrapping its walls around me and my family, protecting us and keeping us warm and safe.  More than anything it became this amazing sanctuary for me to heal in.  I am so, so grateful for it! 

I didn't treat it well. I struggled with maintaining ownership of it since I first went off work sick in 2011. That was hard but I was determined to do what I could to keep a roof over my childrens' heads and somehow I did! I both hated it and loved it after that and it became a somewhat neglected partner.  I stopped caring for it the way I could have. Still, it was so forgiving.  It continued to be a sanctuary for me to begin awakening in.  I will miss this one spot in the house to which I became attached....the dining room with four windows that allow so much light to come in from either side. I wrote so much here.  I can see this amazing yard as I look out.  And that yard out there with the giant trees full of so much Life has become my most faithful companion. The peace and solace I found out there when things in here got tough showed me how sacred this place is. For that reason, I have buried or spread the ashes of so many beloved pets, that once ran joyfully from corner to corner of it, under those trees, as well. They too have become a part of that yard. This spot vibrates with an energy I will miss so much!  Oh God, the growth I have done here. So, so grateful!!

And I know it is time to fill it once again with the love it deserves.  Soon the floors will be echoing the pitter patter of little feet, the sound of childrens's laughter will be bouncing off its walls again. This house will embrace that young life, I know it will, and that life will embrace it. I like to think I am giving the house and this yard what it needs, and more importantly I like to think I am giving others I love what they need, enfolding them in the arms of this space that I once thought was "my home". 

It was never mine.  I just had the opportunity to experience it for awhile and I am so grateful. Now it is time to step back and let others experience Life on this little corner of an intersection, in a tiny neighborhood, in a section of a small city, in a tiny province found in one country, in one of seven continents on this small spinning planet, in a tiny solar system, in a massive galaxy which just happens to be one of trillions. Sigh! What a tiny, tiny sliver of geography  we get to experience our lives on. It is best not to get attached to any of it...love those spots, honor them, take care of them, recognize their sacredness potential and live fully in them but don't get too attached. Though I am leaving this spot for another...I take a part of this energy with me because it has become entangled in this human's experience.  I also leave some of this human's energy behind because I added to it.  Everything is still all connected in one way or another and just because we leave a physical space to move to another, we cannot disentangle from it. We just spread that energy wider. 

I am going to grieve a bit as I pack up. Everytime I look out those windows I can feel the knot in my gut and the tears coming up in release. This is like saying  goodbye to a good old friend....It isn't easy but the emotional experience does not have to be judged as good or bad, right or wrong, should be or shoudn't be. It just is. What I am experiencing is just a human reaction to change and change is the way of evolution and growth, isn't it? 

It is all good.

All is well.

Sensitivity in Social Interactions

 

For the awakened person...the body is no longer just a body. It is a field that receives and transmits subtle energies. When someone enters your space, their emotional state, their thoughts, even their unconscious patterns are felt in your body...not because you absorb them intentionally but because awareness has made you more receptive. This senstivity is a gift but it requires boundaries. 

Eckhart Tolle

I often write about how challenging it is for me to be in busy social environments lately...how challenging it is for me to be around very unconscious people.  After listening to this I understand why:

Your solitude is not a wall between you and the world ...it is a bridge to your essential nature

This movement from being to performing is subtle but for those who are awake or awakening it is profoundly felt.

Love does not always equal resonance. Care does not always equal alignment. Sometimes loving someone means loving them best from a distance without sacrificing your inner clarity...the more present you become, the more deeply you can love others but the less you tolerate the unconsciousness that accompanies them.

I pcik up so much that I cannot even understand

Every human psyche carries its own field of consciousness...its own turbulence...its own stories...the senstive person feels this instantly.

I hate wearing masks now!!

The masks are not wrong. They are not your true self...when someone enters your home[ your space] your mind instinctively reaches for the mask again. Individual performance feels deeply unnatural

It can get really overstimulating to be around a lot of people or to be with people who are very unconscious.

Human interaction when unconscious is noisy, even without words there is mental chatter, subtle tension, emotional residue. When two unconscious people meet, this noise is normal. It is all they know. But when an awakened person meets someone who lives primarily in the mind, the contrast is stark. The quietness of presence must now share space with the turbulence of thought. This is why true connection for the awakened person is rare. They can enjoy company, even cherish it but only when the meeting happens from presence rather than psychological identity. When two people rest in awareness together no one srains energy, no one performs. Silence becomes a companion rather than something to fill. but such meetings are uncommon.

I feel other people in my body!

The body knows before the mind understands. It says, "Something is entering my field. This awareness is not fear...it is intelligence.  The same intelligence that causes animals to withdraw when their environment becomes overstimulating. 

I feel very, very protective now of my time, space, ane energy. 

The more awakened you become the more fiercely Life asks you to protect your energy ...not as resistance but as alignment.  What used to feel tolerable appears noisy. what used to feel normal, begins to feel heavy. You no longer carry the emotional weight of others unconsciously. You feel everything so you must choose carefully what energy enters your space.

I have a hard time being patient with the repetitive unconsciousness of others if it keeps demanding things of this human I call me. 

Visitors [and others you interact with] especially unawakened ones often bring the past with them. They bring stories, opinions, unresolved emotions. Their presence activates memory, identity, history but awakening removes your interest in carrying these burdens. You want to meet Life fresh, without the weight of yesterday and so the mind resists being pulled into narratives it has outgrown.

Social interactions often feel so heavy and draining to me now. 

[They] also activate the ego, not because you want them to but because the ego is activated by attention. As soon as another person enters your space the ego awakens and begins to manage impressions, "How do I appear? What should I say? How should I behave? " This movement away from presence is felt immediately by the awakened person as heaviness...even with people you love deeply you sometimes feel drained. Not because of them but because of the unconscious energy that accompanies them.

I like to remember:

You don't need to entertain, impress, or host. Your simple being becomes healing [when awakened]. This is why the spiritually awake often prefer one-on-one purposeful encounters rather than casual visits. They crave depth, honesty and presence. They cannot tolerate superficiality, not because they judge it, but because it disconnects them from the truth of who they are.

All is well!

Eckhart Tolle Wisdom Why the Spiritually awake don't like visitors https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TI8PKAiUo-4

On the Need for Solitude

Some people believe that solitude means lonliness. that is because they have only experienced the mind's version of being alone, a state filled with anxious thoughts, fears and stories but for someone more awake solitude is not the absence of others...it is the presence of being. 

Eckhart Tolle

This is why I love solitude: 

The spiritually awake person is not antisocial, they value authenticity over performance

To protect this awareness is not avoidance...it is wisdom

When you are alone the boundary between inner and outer dissolves...you feel the stillness of the room merging with the stillness within you

It [suddenly finding yourself alone after being with people for a while] is relief from the subtle tension your body carried while perfoming. You rediscover yourSelf. You sense the return of a spacious inner sky as if the clouds  of social expectation finally drifted away.

When presence becomes your natural state any interuption of it becomes immediately  noticeable....Most people live in constant interuption so they never feel the difference but you do and that senstivity is not weakness...it is evolution.

...roles are subtle prisons....and once you experience freedom from roles even a small return to them feels suffocating

In silence, you remember who you are beyond personality...you sense the living presence that animates your breath, your heartbeat, your awareness. This is the dimension from which true connection arises, not from performance but from authenticity

When you are awakening solitude is not just restful, it is transformative. Your consciousness is reorganizing itself. Old patterns are dissolving, a new sensitivity is emerging. This inner shift requires spaciousness; it requires quiet; it requires that nothing interferes with the delicate process unfolding within you.

Constant social intercation prevents your inner Life from blooming. The spiritually awake person senses this instinctively. They are not withdrawing from the world, they atre nurturing the deepest part of themselves.

You begin to recognize the greatest service you can offer the world is not constant social availability , it is the radiance of your own aligned inner state. When your consciousness is clear, your presence lifts others effortlessly.

The spiritually awake person understands something most people do not.  Energy must be managed with the same care that others reserve for money or time. What you allow into your field shapes your experience of Life. The wrong company can dim your inner light. The right company can amplify it...and sometimes the most noursihing company is no company at all.

Solitude is not the absence of connection.  It is the deepest form of connection to Life, to being, to yourSelf

In solitude the mind becomes quiet enough for the truth to be heard. You meet the living presence that exists beneath all forms. This is why you protect your space, not out of fear, but out of devotion.

All is well!

Eckhart Tolle Wisdom Why the Spiritually awake don't like visitors https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TI8PKAiUo-4

On Not Loving Company

When the doorbell rings...and something within you contracts...it is the simple recognition that your inner space  is being touched...the mind reacts instantly.  It begins preparing a mask...a role...a posture...in that very instant you are taking out of the natural state of presence and pushe dinto the world of psychological identity.

Eckhart Tolle

I am not a big fan of company, especially unannounced company, or company that I perceive comes with a lot of expectation for me to perform. I literally cringe...feel a contraction in my gut...when I find out such company is coming over.  (This is not all company...just some).  It is not that I do not care for the people coming over, that I don't want to see them but there has always been something about people coming into my space that triggers me. This has been going on for as long as I can remember.  It gets more and more intense, the more I wake up. I couldn't completely undersatnd it until lately.

I came across this video from Eckhart Tolle that explains and validates my experience completely. 

Vistors don't enter your home, they enter the field of energy that you have been cultivating....an inner sanctuary where the noise of the world temporarily dissolves. Protecting that space is not selfishness. It is honoring the truth of your own being. 

Most people believe they enjoy constant company because they have never truly met themselves. Silence is unsettling to them because it reveals what is unresolved within (I relate this to Penses 139/Pascal) but for the one who is awakening...silence is not emptiness, it is nourishment

That is why the thought of someone coming over  immediately triggers a contraction -the mind   anticipates having to shrink this spaciousness back into a social form.

Visitors...activate the psychological self, the part of you that is conditioned by society, family, culture. This self is concerned with impressions, expectations, and social norms...when visitors arrive the mind tries to revive it. And this revival feels like a step backwards into unconsciousness.

Many people enter your home not physically but energetically with unresolved pain. They may be anxious, restless, angry, cheerful on the surface but carrying heaviness underneath. Even their expectations about how the interaction should unfold carry weight. The awakened person senses all this immediately. They feel the subtle disturbance in the field of awareness. The mind interprets this sensitivity as discomfort but awareness knows it simply as misalignment. The energy of the visitor is not in harmony with the stillness you cultivated. and so your whole being naturally withdraws not out of rejection but out of the instinct to return to presence. 

I am so free here as I sit here in this space doing what I do...so myself...but as soon as I hear someone is coming over...this sanctuary suddenly becomes a messy, unkept house others will judge etc. I like seeing my house as this place I can be me.

Your home becomes a temple. Your silence becomes a practice. Your solitude becomes a teacher. When you close your door you are not shutting people out you are inviting yourself in.

 One day you recognize something beautiful.  You do not need to apologize for your boundaries. You do not need to justify your solitude. You do not need to explain why visitors drain you. Your energy belongs to you. Your inner space belongs to you. Your awakening belongs to you. So, the next time the door bell rings and your body tightens...pause...not to judge the feeling...but to understand it. It is simply Life reminding you of who you are now. You are someone now who values peace over performance, presence over noise, truth over expectation. And the world desperately needs people who live this way. You are not rejecting others.  You are protecting the sanctuary where awakening happens., where you meet yourself, where you remember what you truly are.

All is well!

Eckhart Tolle Wisdom Why the Spiritually awake don't like visitors https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TI8PKAiUo-4