Beyond Science and Western Thinking

 I must know the heart of this life, its very essence, what it is, not only how it works and what are its manifestations. I want the Why of everything. I leave the how to children. 

Vivekananda

I am not like other people.  I never was, I suppose. Though I have a love of science I want more than the answers it can provide.  I want more than the knowing of "what" and "how".  I want to know "why". Hmm! That takes me  beyond scientific thought, beyond my western conditioning, to the ancient wisdom of the East.  I know nothing...I may never know anything...but I want to understand the "why" behind existence.

Hmm!

All is well. 

Sure to Join the Ocean of Life

 The whole of mankind will become Jivanmuktas-free whilst living. We are all struggling towards that one and through our jealousies and hatreds, through our love and cooperation. 

A tremendous stream is flowing towards the ocean carrying us all along with it; and though like straws and scraps of paper we may at times float aimlesly about, in the long run we are sure to join the Ocean of Life and Bliss.

Vivekananda (2.5.9 Chapter Nine, Complete Works)

He talks about floating aimlessly. Yes, many of us float aimlessly.  I also see that many of us, like me, when we decide to swim against the current or try to cling to everything from this world as we swim along... do not float...we splash and splatter and we get pulled down. 

Michael A. Singer speaks to this pulling down in the below linked podcast.  I often feel pulled down...I take this amazing awareness...consciousness and I bring this great universal energy and focus it down on my experience in the water...not even my experience in the water..."my idea" of my experience on this water grasping and clinging, trying to save other people from drowning and going down with them. 

Regardless of how I struggle or get distracted in the petty concerns of "me"...I am still being carried towards the Ocean...I am becoming a Jivanmuktas with or without my awareness, my cooperation, my attention focused on this purpose.

Life, however, would feel so much better...be much more enjoyable if we simply layed back and observed, experienced fully, and let go of all the stuff that passes by as we lay here....being taken to the bliss of Who I Am. 

All is well

Michael A. Singer/ Temple of the Universe/ Sounds True ( October, 2025) Escaping the Call of the Ego: A Call to Liberation. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RZ3g2hb26Dg&list=PLyOuAoSmZkKoESr2acNWwhznusbBkKXsT&index=2

Completing Its Task

 Let your higher Self complete Its task.

Gary Zuhav

Hmm! Bernado Katsrup tells us in the below clip that most of us are not permitting ourselves to live Life fully. We are as he quotes:

Living our  lives to culturally bound recipes.

He speaks of the Daimon...our true nature and states if we want to live fully, we need to do the Daimon's bidding. We need to let nature and Life do their work through us.

As Zukav says above we need to let the higher Self complete Its task. What does he mean by that?

I don't know about you but I find it comforting to think that I came here with a basic idea of what challenges I would face in this life time...that maybe I actually chose them for the purpose of the Soul's growth. I like to think that everything is happening as it is meant to and that my job is to stay open to the flow of Life. When things get tough I try to remind myself that Life knows what it is doing...It is using this Self in human form for some great purpose I don't have to understand but that will allow this soul to experience, learn, and grow. 

I don't want to keep blindly going with the cultural flow...like a tiny fish in a school of fish.  I want to do what Life expects me to do.  I want to fulfill my pre-birth contract, if that is such a thing, even if that means being ostracized. 

There are times when the challenges for this human are so heavy I just want to give up.  I remind myself at these times why I am here: to serve some purpose I do not need to understand.  It isn't about this little psyche I call "me. " So what if it finds it a little tough! "Suck it Up, Buttercup!" This is about the Self. I renew my determination to let the Higher Self complete Its task. I get on with the business of living,

All is well.

Bernardo Katsrup (August 29, 2025) Permission to Live Your Life to Full. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KGfqd4YFlWw&t=268s

Gary Zukav (198/2014) The Seat of the Soul. New York: Simon and Schuster

Hmm! 

The "Word"

 The external aspect of the thought of God is the Word, and as God thought and willed before He created, creation came out of the Word.

Vivekananda

Interested in exploring the Infinite field of energy behind everything- the primordial field. In ancient Indian tradition there is something called the Akashic Records, a place where all eternal knowledge is stored. Looking into the brilliant mind and works of Ervin Laszlo.

The "Word" is often used to explain this field.

Man shall not live on bread alone, but by every word that comes from the mouth of God. 

Matthew 4:4 NIV

All is well

Work Your Way Through

 This life is a hard fact; work your way through it boldly, though it may be adamantine; no matter, the soul is stronger....It lays no responsibility on little gods; for you are the makers of your own fortunes. You make yourselves suffer, you make good and evil, and it is you who puts your hands before your eyes. Take your hands away and see the light; you are effulgent, you are perfect already, from the very beginning....

How are we to see it? This mind, so deluded, so weak, so easily led, even this mind can be strong and may catch a glimpse of that knowledge, that Oneness, which saves us from dying again and again.

As rain falling upon a mountain flows in various streams down the sides of the mountain, so all the energies which you see here are from that one Unit. It has become manifold falling upon Maya. Do not run after the manifold; go towards the One.

Vivekananda 

Hmm! This helps a bit in understanding why we need these physical lives that can be so crazy at times, so challenging. It is all a part of our spiritual growth.  We will see and understand Truth so much better by seeing "through" this drama to what is real.

But as man sees his own face in a mirror, perfect, distinct, and clear, so is the Truth shining in the soul of man. The highest heaven, therefore, is in our own souls; the greatest temple of worship is the human soul, greater than all heavens, says the Vedanta; for in no heaven anywhere, can we understand the reality as distinctly and clearly as in this life, in our own soul. 

All is well.

Vivekananda (n.d.) 2.5.9 Chapter 9: Unity in Diversity (London, 1896) Complete Works of Swami Vivekananda. Kindle Edition

Susceptible Inner Nerves

 Take the lowest man; he lives in the forest. His sense of enjoyment is very small, and so also is his power to suffer. If he does not get plenty of food, he is miserable; but give him plenty of food and freedom to rove and hunt, and he is perfectly happy. His happiness consists only in the senses, and so does his misery. But if that man increases his knowledge, his happiness will increase, the intellect will open to him, and his sense enjoyment will evolve into intellectual enjoyment. He will feel pleasure in reading a beautiful poem, and a mathematical problem will be of absorbing interest to him.[Note: the poem and not the mathematical problem applies to this human I call "me":) ] But, with these, the inner nerves will become more susceptible to miseries of mental pain, of which the savage does not think. 

Vivekananda (2.5.9 Chapter 9: Unity on Diversity; Complete Works; Kindle) 

Again, I am trying to understand this sense of "suffering" the actor in this heavy drama is experiencing and why.  Why do I get so lost in character and have such a difficult time pulling my attention off the drama? Haven't I learned through my intellectual and spiritual pursuits that I am only playing a part here?  That that character isn't who I am? That the physical scenery around me is just a bunch of props that can be taken down just as quickly as they were put up...that this staged physical world is not the "real" one...that it is just illusion or "maya"? ? Why do we humans see it as real, even though we know at some level that it isn't? Why does maya have such a pull on us humans to the point this energy that is meant to be so high gets pulled down so low? 

I look at the quote above. I think...Maya must have a purpose. We are not yet at the point of evolution, maybe, that we can handle the whole truth about reality. We are still evolving. Evolution goes through stages.

Maya, a Part of the Evolutionary Process

Like it is in the "savage"(not a word I approve of) infinite consciousness, that knows everything already, has to be filtered and strained through the human brain so only a small amount of information ...that which is necessary for survival...can pour through. We as characters on the stage do not see all there is to this experience of Living. We are limited to the physical, that which can be picked up by the five senses. Physical survival of the human organism has to be priority...if consciousness is to experience living through this physical host. In the early stages of human evolution, then, consciousness just focused on our hunting and gathering tendencies...on the basics. At the same time though, there was a sense or a deeper knowing that could not be conceptualized, only experienced as it is in animals, of a connection to something bigger and deeper. There was this knowing ...through intuition...through instinct...etc of consciousness, without having any ideation, vocabulary, or conceptualization to explain it. It didn't have to be explained. It didn't have to be known.  It just was. There was a sense of happiness when basic needs were met, and a sense of suffering when they weren't. It was so simple. There was none of  this "mental" suffering that plagues humans today. 

With intellectualization and a growing thirst for knowing we have expanded beyond our survivalist nature. We are evolving into a search for comfort and building on how to maintain that comfort. We are leaps and bounds away from the "uncomfortable" forest. Yet, we are more miserable now than we were when survival was the only thing on our mind.

As we began to think more...we needed to create an "idea" of a world that would make sense to us. That is where "maya" came to be. Maya is a false idea of reality. Intellectualization has led to us having to create false realities to explain our inner turmoil. Consciousness was expanded from survival focus to Maya focus.  We created a character= "me". We then wrote some plays, set up some stages, and began acting some roles. That became real to us. It became the only reality.

We are much more technologically and intellectually advanced...but we are farther away, as a result, from that inner knowing primitive man had. We are much more miserable.  It takes a lot more than a full belly to make us or keep us happy. Why? We are lost in "ideas" and the need to "prove it" therefore we are lost in maya. This stage is not real people!  There is so much more to reality than what can be picked up with the five senses, of what can be created in the human mind. 

My own mind has gone from a survival tendency, to an intellectual or "let me explain why" tendency and that has left me feeling pretty miserable. I created and got lost in this play. I became the character of "me" and somehow, in a way I do not yet fully understand, I have created the scenes around me or enhanced the drama in my attempt to control it. It became so real to me. Now, I feel caught in a heavy drama I ...as an actor lost in character...really do not want to be in.

I am still evolving so I, like many other humans, can see that is what is happening.  I can see both what is happening on the stage and to some degree what is happening off stage. I know I want to spend more time off stage. I know it is more "real" back here than it is up there. I catch myself waking up on stage ...I step back into the audience....I do my best to stay in the audience but...because I am far from evolved...I find myself back on the stage thinking it is real again and again. For me it is when I am on stage that I am miserable, and when I am off stage that I find the peace I long for.  This is where I am in my evolution....caught between two seemingly real worlds. This is where I am meant to be. ...for now.

The Susceptible Inner Nerves of Intellectualization

Consciousness is experiencing a person waking up through this human I call "me". When I am on stage only so much of the collective unconscious flows through  a very narrow door in my mind and into my experience. Albeit, what flows through is much more than it was during my pre-intellectualizing days but not as much as it could be. The door is only partly open. I can go only so far beyond "surviving mode". Now this mind is also flooded with thinking, believing, ideation, opinion, judgement, preference, craving, aversion etc. This stuff is piled up on the inside of the door, jarring it, and preventing it from opening more. It is in the way of allowing that connection, that intuition, and non-conceptual knowing that the primitive man experienced from coming through. So, I feel separated from it...therefore alone and miserable.  It is also blocking "shakti" flow...so the natural joy and love that I am, cannot pour through. I don't feel that joy! I feel the absence of it!  So, I go looking outward onto the stage and its drama to make me feel better inside. Of course, it doesn't take long to realize that this physical world stuff is not going to fix what is happening inside. That equates to more suffering, more misery. That is where I am still spending most of my time.

When I am off stage, different ball game. I feel peace, joy, awareness of Truth.  I see so clearly the stage in front of me and I know it isn't real.  I see that I sometimes play a role up there but that is not who I am.  I see that is just the physical world and the physical body. There is so much more to reality than that, than what can be picked up with the five senses. The door in my mind opens more and more and more stuff pours through. I see inklings of truth pouring through; with it trickles of pure peace and joy! I know...Who I am cannot be confined to a form, to a place, to a certain level of knowing. I want to fall deeper back.  I want more than the inklings of Truth or the trickles of joy coming through this door. I want it all. I want to trace those trickles back to the Source. At the same time, unfortunately, I know I have a ways to go. Though I don't want to leave this place, I know I am going to be pulled back into the drama of the physical plane again and again. I suffer knowing I am going to repeatedly suffer the loss of this place and the drama of the other. The drama on stage seems even more heavy after connecting with the lightness of higher consciousness. Sigh! 

This is the stage of evolution I am, as this human, at. My goal is to stay off stage but before I can I have to accept, and embrace, honor and learn from the physical realm that I keep getting pulled back to. I keep getting pulled back into the drama for a reason.  I still have much, much learning to do. 

Sigh!

Wow! That helps me to see a bit more clearly why I suffer so.  Thanks to teh collective unconscious for allowing that insight to come through.

All is well in my world.

The Pull to Play a Part in an Intense Drama

 

There is no normal life, Wyatt. It's just life. Get on with it!

From the movie "Tombstone"

I would like to understand this chronic pull down of awareness to the going-ons of the problematic "me" that most of us are inflicted with.  Each of us as individuals are one of  8.5 billion humans, one of trillions of other beings, held down by the magical force of gravity to an absolutely amazing planet, as we spin around one star in a small solar system that exists in a galaxy of billions which exists in  universe of trillions of galaxies ...and still we focus on this question, "What about me?"  

I look outside and see the most amazing light being reflected off the most beautiful and bright hues of oranges, and reds, and yellows. (My part of the world is a piece of art in the Autumn, a blaze of warm colour that can take your breath away [if you are paying attention]) ) I have amazing trees surrounding me when I sit outside. And the breeze blowing through them is more soothing than any lullaby, more inspiring than any symphony. I have all kinds of wildlife in my yard that I relate to...crows that come to me when I call them, red squirrels, grey squirrels, blue jays, chickadees, occasionally fox, deer, and bear. My grandchildren run across the grass as if they are lions on the Serengeti plain...seeing and experiencing the vastness of it.  I feel so grateful for this world when I watch them, hear their giggles or get swallowed up in a Nana huddle.  I can sit here ...see that yard outside my window, while I type comprehensible symbols on a screen and someone somewhere can read what thoughts I have in my head and understand.  I have books I published sitting beside me...captured symbols on paper that I can share with other humans. At the same time, I have furry four-legged creatures all around me who understand and relate to me in a different way. Who remind me that I am a being of warmth, joy, and love. This experiencing of "living"...of being here is absolutely amazing!!!

Yet....

I watch this human I call "me" in this spot and see how quickly she can go from "awe" of this vast universe to being absorbed in "my" own puny little sense of suffering.  This awareness that is focusing on all the miraculous in that world out there, in an instant, gets pulled down into some drama this "me" doesn't want to be in. A costume is slapped on me and I get so, so lost in the character of "me" again. I become that character and see what is happening on stage as reality.  And the drama is so darn depressing! The plot graph seems to consist only of rising action and little to no resolution.  All dark and heavy scenes...so little light and comedic ones. I go from "awe" to "Oh no! Not now!" again and again and again.

Why, if reality is so darned amazing, do we as humans get pulled down into the drama of Maya so easily. What hold does it have on us?

I feel so heavy lately, so beat down and broken down by life circumstance.  I hear myself asking that very silly question even though it sounds so strange to these ears now that I am waking up. "What about "me"? What do I do about "me"? "My" life is difficult? How do I make it better for "me"?"

Sigh

Then the somewhat awakened mind will step in and say, "Whose "me"? What is the "my" of this thing you call "my life"? Why do you have to do anything about this "me"...about its life. You are not here to make it better for this "me". You are not a "problematic  me." You are an intergral but non-controlling part of this process of Life. Just experience it. Enjoy it!"

Enjoy it?  I want to. I see and know at some deep level what is there to enjoy but how do I do that when the drama on stage is so in your face, when I do not understand the pull it has over me. When I do manage to get off stage and into my practice,  I keep getting a hood thrown over my head and pulled back onto the stage. When the hood is pulled off,  I am the character again who wants nothing more than for the drama to lighten up.

This human drama on the physical plane is not reality. I am not the character. I am the Objective Observer. I know that! I know the answer is to stay off the stage and simply observe what is going on up there, experiencing it from a distance. I do.  Why do I keep getting lost in the character and pulled down to those low energy states? 

I do get to the point where I can step off stage again. I come around a bit for a while, but the drama is so compelling...so demanding of "my" attention. I can't seem to stay off for long. So, I find myself asking Life to fix the script a bit. I ask this on occasion even when I am off stage because I can see that I am on stage so much I feel I have to do something about it. There is so much suffering calling, up there, to "me" from others. I feel all these arms pulling me down. It is so hard to escape it for long. 

I absorb this suffering when I play my human role.  It feels like I am drowning and swallowing  water. My gut is literally sore because I am so full of this dirty water. That is when I ask the questions, "Why? Why "me"? Why have I been casted for this part I do not want to play in this human drama? Why is this play so full of the heavy stuff? Where is the comedic relief?  Where are the fools and jokers who can make this human laugh with silly nonsense?"

 I am tired of trying to soothe all the Shylock's and Lady MacBeth's around me. I try to bargain with the script writers and directors, "You know I love to laugh. Man...I would play this part so much better if the character got a few breaks from the heavy stuff and got to laugh a little more. "  

But...they don't seem to agree. They understand what they are looking for from this drama more than I do, I guess, because the drama just keeps building and building and building. 

I do not want to use my practice as a means of escaping the stage. The stage and all its drama must have some purpose I do not understand. I just do not want to drown in it.  I do not want this amazing consciousness to get so lost in the part that it sees itself as nothing more than a burnt out and depressed human being. I want to remember that I am the Objective Observer...watching and participating in the life of this human but not pulled down by it.

Sigh...

I will some day remember without doubt Who I Am...and I will enjoy simply playing the part of a human "me" without getting lost in that role. I will see and know that the scene outside my window, unlike the drama on stage, is a reality worthy of my undivided attention and I will be able to give it that without being pulled away by a "me" that serves no one.

All is well.

Neither Good or Bad

 Do not think that good and evil are two, are two separate essences, for they are one and the same thing, appearing in different degrees and in different guises and producing differences of feeling in the same mind. 

From the Vedanta

I am thinking of Bernardo Katsrup's "daimon" again.  I still do not know much about it at all as I have yet to read the book but I stumbled upon this from Vivekananda's "Complete Works" at the same time. I feel, for some reason, they go together. 

And of course this line from Hamlet that I often quote comes to mind.

Nothing is either good or bad but thinking makes it so.

Alan Watt's "irreducable rascality also comes to mind. I think that is the daimon. Hmm!

 All is well

The Goal to Flow

 You are not what happens to you, but what flows through you.

Unknown (I heard this a few days ago and rushed to write it down but forgot to scribble down the name of the author, assuming I would remember. [When will I remember that I won't remember these things?lol])

Most of us are stuck in some form of suffering because we are constantly "reacting" to life events seeing ourselves as fused parts in the drama. We see ourselves as heros, victims, villains based on 'what happens' to us. The above statement tells us, however, that we are not these events or these things that appear to "happen to us"...We are that which flows through us [or should flow through].  

What flows through? 

Uncontaminated Life...unclung to Life, Life that is not resisted and pushed away because we judge it as painful, bad, wrong, shouldn't be.  That is what flows through us. 

We need to, Learn to handle life events. 

Why? 

If you can't handle them you are going to store them....

Why is it wrong to store them?

If you store them, you "cling" to them and  you will create samskaras...blockages, a thick veil within that prevents the Life that you are from flowing through you.  If Life doesn't flow through...if you do not see how it can flow through...you will identify with the stuff that gets stored and stuck within. You will be bound. You will not see Who you truely Are. 

Who are we truly?

We are the Life meant to flow through. We are the Self when purified. 

The purified mind is no different,  than the Self...RamaKrishna

We are not the thoughts...your thoughts are not aware of themselves. We are that which can observe and be aware of those thoughts. We are awareness. We are Consciousness. 

We are That which always was and that which will always be...

Vivekananda pleads, 

Men of childish intellect, ignorant persons run after desires which are external, and enter the trap of far-reaching death, but the wise, understanding immortality, never seek for the Eternal in this life of finite things.

What is the end goal of  purification and Self-realization? 

To go back up with less than you came down with

Hmm! I am still a bit too attached to my 'stinking thinking'  and the drama, but I keep working on it. My goal is purification so Life can flow through...so Who I Am can flow through. What about you?

All is well.

Michael A. Singer/ Temple of the Universe/ Sounds True ( October6, 2025) You Are Not Your Mind: The Journey Back to Self. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=muovC_4DVqA&list=PLyOuAoSmZkKoESr2acNWwhznusbBkKXsT&index=1

Vivekananda: Complete Works

More Vedic Wisdom on Self and Soul

 

The Self -existent One projected the senses outwards and, therefore, a man looks outward, not within himself. A certain wise one, desiring immortality, with inverted senses, perceived the Self within.

The Vedas

Huh? Say what crazy lady?

I am assuming "the certain wise one" was one of those early rishis, possibly even patanjali. Anyway, what was discovered by this "certain wise one" supports teachings that apply to life today.

Most of humans have an outward focus...we use the energy of this amazing inner essence we do not understand because we do not take the time to explore It...to focus outwardly.

We then tend to very selectively bring the "external world" in to satisfy, numb, help us to soothe or distract from the mess we made inside (because we neglected it)  through our senses. We depend heavily on what our senses pick up  from the external world around us. We tend to look outward rather than inward for "peace". We have a "worldly" focus rather than a "spititual" one. We often call what is out there "reality" and what is in here "airy-fairy nonsense". 

We live by the mantra: I am not okay inside and this might make me feel okay inside.

In order to find that which we think we can find "out there" we need to turn our gaze inward...away from the impermanent and constantly changing phenomena of the outside world to the 'Eternal Internal'. Everything in the physical world is fleeting, finite and just a reflection of reality. Everything in the Soul is eternal and true. 

Vivekananda goes on to say that:

...the word used for the Soul is very significant: it is He who has gone inward, the innermost reality of our being, the heart centre, the core, from which, as it were, everything comes out; the central sun of which the mind, the body, the sense-organs and everything else we have are rays going outward.

This Truth found in the Atman/ Soul/ Deepest Core can flow from the inside out once we clear the path from all our human junk storage. When we go inward, with seeking Self as our goal, clearing and cleaning the path to that innermost part of all...the Soul [Sat Chit Ananda] can shine through onto the world. 

Back to the Vedanta:

Men of childish intellect, ignorant persons, run after desires which are external,and enter the trap of far-reaching death, but the wise, understanding immortality, never seek for the Eternal in this life of finite things....

Vivekananda explains this to mean

...in this external world, which is full of finite things, it is impossible to see and find the Infinite. The Infinite must be sought in that alone which is infinite, and the only thing infinite about us is that which is within us, our own soul. Neither the body, nor the mind, not even our thoughts, nor the world we see around us, are infinite. The Seer, He to whom they all belong, the Soul of the man. He who is awake in the internal man, alone is infinite, and to seek for the Infinite Cause of this whole universe we must go there. In this Infinite Soul alone we can find it.

This that we are seeking-the Infinite ( whether we call it that or not): everlasting peace and happiness, fulfillment, the answers to Life's most pressing questions, God, Heaven, immortality is not found out there. It can only be found inside where the Soul resides.

As Michael Singer says,

If you can be okay inside no matter what is happening outside, you have transcended into a great being.

Moral of this rampage: Look inside!!!

All is well.

Micahel A. Singer/ Temple of the Universe/ Sounds True ( October 2, 2025) The Real Work: Letting Go from Within. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e2ts8daBw98&list=PLyOuAoSmZkKoESr2acNWwhznusbBkKXsT&index=1&t=2s

Vivekananda (n.d.)2.5.9 Chapter 9: Unity in Diversity [from a lecture delivered on Novemeber 3, 1896] The Complete Works of Swami Vivekananda . Kindle Edition

Tathata

 The perfect man uses his mind as a mirror. It grasps nothing, it refuses nothing. It receives but does not keep.

Zhuangzi

Tathata is  a word that simply means "That, that, and that". It is referring to the ten thousand functions, ten thousand things, one suchness.

Everything is energy. Life is a dance of energy playing around us and through us. Death is just the other face of  that energy, 

and it is the rest, the not being anything around that which produces something around

You can't have space without solid, or solid without space

You are a playing of this one energy

Energy is eternal delight...William Blake

And where does our greater wisdom come in?

...and you suddenly see through the whole sham of things. You realize you're that and you can't be anything else...but that

You are that Tathata...that everything.

All is well

Note: I am trusting the below is actually Alan Watts speaking from past recordings and not an  AI impersonation? 

T & H-Inspiration and Motivation (2024) Trust the Universe-Alan Watts on Finding Zen. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NBmuvR9QYLs&t=553s

Understanding the Nature of Life a Bit Better

My life is not about me, your life is not about you...I was never in control...I am in the hands of nature, nature is never in my hands...

I listened to an amazing podcast this morning after watching this same speaker be interviewed on Mayim Bailik's Breakdown the day before. Bernado Katsrup spoke on both the Breakdown and The Weekend University about his book, "Daimon and the Soul of the West" which I will, of course, have to add to my library and the already overcrowded recesses of my limited intellectual mind. :) 

I get this guy! I love it when I "get it" with people who seem to think like I do or be on the same wave length. (That is a subjective  interpretation.... of course...my intellectual ego is assuming it is on par with someone who just happens to be brilliant...Am I more than a little arrogant, maybe? In actuality, I could have a conversation with this man and all that would come to be in the thought bubble above my head is a big foggy, "duh!"lol) What I mean by wave length is that we have similar self explored ideation. He speaks to things I just happen to share here. It is cool to realize that first of all, I am not the only crazy person in the world who thinks like this, and secondly, that what I have to say is validated as possibly having the ability of making sense to others. He is  hinting to the same idea of Truth I seek and share here. 

There was a bit of a blanket warning for people, like me, who delve into Eastern wisdom thinking they understand it, "get it" despite all their western conditioning.  I will never understand the wisdom of the East in the way someone from the East does because I lack that cultural conditioining that is the context of these beliefs. I cannot understand the Vedas like a Hindu can, for example, because they were written and shared and taught in and around the context of Indian culture which I was never a part of.  And my English thinking brain can not digest the sankrit without losing much in translation. I miss the subtle but very important nuances wrapped in the culture and language that surround these belief patterns...therefore I can not "get it" completely. 

And my western conditioning gets in the way of the true spiritual goal of these teachings...the ultimate truth! Yes, I want truth now...I want to understand why I am here and what this is all for...and I say that more than anything...but ...if I am completely honest...there is and always has been an ulterior motive to my seeking.  Like many westerns who delve into these wisdom traditions for understanding, my main goal, was and  is "to end this suffering that I, as the human I call "me", experiences now." 

This truth expressed in the ancient wisdom traditions of the East are not personal but my western conditioning personalizes everything. Sigh.

Katsrup speaks of something called the daimon. It is the impersonal essence or force of nature that exists in all of us and if we are not mindful it can "capture"us and make us do unconscious things we would not normally do if we were conscious and aware . Though some may see "demon" in that word, it is neither good or bad...it just is, just as the tornado that tears down cities just is, or the tsunami that wipes away an entire village just it, or the rains that come after a drought to save a population, just is. Neither good or bad...just is.  Not out to reward or punish...just is.   This is nature doing what nature does and we can't personalize the daimon. It is similar to what jung would call the collective unconscious or what Tolle would call the "collective pain body"...come from so many different vraiables that played with nature over the years. It is nature expressing itself through these variables in us. 

The collective unconscious is impersonal...within this impersonal collective unconscious (nature) there can be parts of it that are more individuated and personal..."semi autonomous complexities in collective unconscious"as Jung would say...if we are in the cognitve neighborhood when one  of these complexiies pass by...it may seize us as a means to express itself. somewhat paraphrased.  

It is good to know that and keep that in mind as I proceed.  I mean I am leaps and bounds ahead now than I was when I first started looking into this wisdom from the East, in terms of depersonalizing it, but I have a way to go. I don't yet get it!

I do feel this daimon in me though when I come here to write. The daimon, he goes on to say, wanting through us is also these inexplicable callings we have to do things (like writing this blog) that do not serve the personal self...that are meant for the collective.  I feel the transcendence, creativity, expressing nature the way nature wants to express itself through us Hmm!

Nature, he goes on to say, is who we are and how we are made. Nature gives us life and it expresses itself through us.  There really is nothing personal about it.

Life is something nature is doing through us.

As I often write, we need to surrender to nature, allow it to express itself through us. Unlike Singer and others, however, this author says that surrender is not something we choose to do, 

Surrender is not something you choose to do...it is something that is beaten into you [through life circumsatnce and challenge].

You open up to surrender [when you have had enough and have no other choice]

He reminds us that Life is our greatest teacher. We will encounter many happy accidents from Life that lead us to transformation. These struggles are something we will later be grateful for. We just have to trust that nature knows best.  We as human minds know so little in comparison. 

Whatever can happen in my skull is nothing compared to the wisdom of nature.

We are all microcosms in the macrocosm.

Every life is an entire universe.

He also speaks a great deal about 'evil" in regards to this daimon, but I will wait until I read the book before I speak to that.

So glad I discovered another like minded human on this planet :) 

All is well!

The Weekend University ( October 2, 2025) Bernardo Katsrup:Aligning with Nature's Will...https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OGbZXMQLYss&t=4481s

Mayam Bialik's Breakdown (October, 2025) Is Reality a Dream? Consciousness, Intuition, and Life After Death./ Dr. Bernardo Katsrup https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RB0PtR0wMow&t=2s

Not This Reflection

 The Ego's Reflection

Like Narcissus did so curiously, many centuries ago
I look about for who I am.  I simply do not know.
When I glance into the water I am surprised by what I see;
there I find a shiny reflection staring smugly back at me.

"This must be who I am," I utter as I reach in to pick "me" up
but  alas this watery  image, with my hands, I just can't seem to cup.
It slips through my fingers no matter how tightly I hold on.
It drips, slithers  and  trickles away. What am I doing wrong?

Fear then overcomes me. This precious image I do not want to  lose.
So I seek and grasp  at any  form around me that  I can somehow use
to help me retrieve my perfect self from the surface of this lake;
to gather it up  in its shiny  form within me,  to end a desperate  ache.

But no matter what I grab or try to cling to, like the water, it slips through
the space between my fingers and disappears from earthly view.
I can not understand it as my  confusion and  frustration grows
I cry out questions to the Echo, to Nemesis and to anyone that knows.

"Why is it so challenging to hold onto a dense  object made of matter?
And why does this lovely image I look upon break apart and splatter
whenever I dip my fingers beneath the surface the gawking world sees?"
Then I hear the silent  answer from within me and I fall down upon  my knees.
 
What I look upon so longingly, will never be more than a  mere  reflection
always lacking in the depth of being , in sweet stillness and divine perfection.
I am not just a shadow rippling on the surface of this pool of collected rain
I am the Seer, not the seen.  I am the  creator, not the  goddess of the vain.

White and gold petals soon surround the image  marking its glorious rebirth
and the roots of understanding ground the Self I am more deeply into earth. 
Who I am cannot be reflected back for anyone to name, or know or see
and it is with  this eternal knowing that the Observer is finally set free.
 
Dale-Lyn Feb 2020

I am obsessed with understanding the personality and the nature of who we truly are which I know somehow is not the personality. It is much deeper, much bigger than this idea we have of "me" and "you". At the same time it is formless so it cannot be understood in physical terms...it cannot be picked up, held, clung to no matter how much we try to. The personality is just a reflection on a lake.

I wrote the above five years ago.  I have spent the last five years observing  this personality, this ego, I have been so attached to all my life, believing it was what I was and struggling to protect it. I slowly, slowly (and not yet completely) stopped trying to pick it up, to hold onto it, to identify with it. My view has gone from a very small apeture focus of "this is my life",  to a larger one of "this is Life". It keeps getting wider and this personality keeps getting smaller within it. Hmm. 

 I see this "me"...that is the reality for so many of us... as an illusion ...a mere reflection...not who I am.  Nothing in this physical world makes much sense to me anymore. I do not yet know who I am- in the felt experience of knowing but I know it is not this personality I call "me".

Hmm!

All is well.

Be Growth Oriented, Not Goal Oriented

Be the best being that you can, serving what is unfolding in front of you.

Michael A. Singer

Hmm!

Michael A. Singer teaches, in the below linked video, that though society teaches us to be "goal oriented", over being "growth oriented"...

Goal orientation does not make you a Great Being...

Most of us do not wake up in the morning asking the important question, "How can I grow today towards becoming a better "being," more aligned with  my Higher Self?  No... most of us are overly concerned with keeping up with society's goal driven mind set...about the opinion of others. With this mindset...we find ourselves worried about what we can "do", how we can appear so we can avoid not pleasing or not being accepted by others. We find ourselves beating ourselves up for those times we do not do enough or meet the objectives we and others have set for ourselves, for not reaching our smart goals, for not checking off enough on our "to-do" lists. We also project our inadequacies onto others...judging others for not doing enough or not "being" the way we assume they should be. We do not see...that this is what other opinion is.  That it has nothing to do with us but what the other is experiencing, perceiving, based on their own experiences of life.  But we personalize other opinions so much that we spend our lives trying to please and avoid rejection. We do not see that...

Every minute of your life is doing the best that you can....it is never about winning or losing...it has nothing to do with other people and what they think of you

Opinion is just projection of whatever we stuffed and stored inside calling it our "personality".  It is not reality. The opinion and judgement you have of the so-called "failures" of  others should be totally irrevalent for them.  The opinion of others has nothing to do with us, therefore it should be totally irrevelant to us. 

We just have to own our lives and do the best taht we can with every moment ...Our best will depend on where we are -with what we have learned so far, how evolved and conscious we are, the circumstances we encounter and have encountered.  We do the best with that moment based on where we are . Then we ask: 

Did you do the best that you can in that set of circumatnces? Would you do it again. We learn from that and we move on.

The question we should be asking is, "What do I want to do with this day...how an I be better? How can I live from a higher place than I did yesterday?"

What should we do then? What jobs do we do?

Life will give a job to you...How do you know the job for you? It is in front of you...you started the process of applying yourself and doing the best you can in the job that presented itself to you...

And we do that without trying to reach some "external" goal...some idea of "success". There is no attachment to outcome. Our purpose is to learn and grow.  It is to experience this job...whatever it is that showed up...with allowance, and appreciation for the opportunity to experience this "doing" in this moment.

As it Applies to a Photography Job

I had an opportunity to apply this truth to some "doing" that unfolded in front of me.  I was asked to shoot some engagement photos for my daughter. I was ambivalent about doing it. Ego was involved: Shamer said, "Nah! You can't do that...you do not shoot people well...You will screw up and they will be disappointed. Others will judge you as a terrible photographer. " It then reminded me of all my terrible photo shoots.  

Then Redeemer stepped up to say, "Yes do it! Prove to others that you can shoot well. Get that good opinion from others." It reminded me of some of my good and even "great" shots. 

Well, I did it. And as usually happens when I am behind a lens...something takes over and I just shoot.   It isn't about me and my petty ego. It is a doing that is done for the sake of doing with little to no attachment to outcome. It doesn't matter if this "me" is good or bad at what she does. I lose the goal orientation.That is both a strength and a weakness in photography lol. In landscape photography that usually works for me.  In potrait photography, it doesn't always work for "me"...the photographer with an ego. There is so much to consider and you have to "technically" be on the ball which I often am not. Sigh!

I see through this experience that I am still suck in old patterns atht do not align me with Higher Self. 

I am very, very hard on myself when it comes to viewing my pics in Lightroom for the first time. I am very concerned about what others may think. Will my images make others see me as a good photographer? Why do I even care?  I never ever called myself anything but a very amateurish photographer...a life long learner of this craft. I was, at a deeper level, just concerned with my growth and I saw myself simply as a person who wants to learn to take better pictures of this world everytime she shoots. When I shoot lanscapes, animals, or children...it is all learning and growing without any expectation of outcome. I never fear the judgement.  These things...I shoot...I know are not going to judge my skill level. But when you shoot people who want you ...to not capture them as they are...but capture some image they have of themselves or want to have of themselves...it is a totally different ballgame. 

So, as I look at the pics I have taken...almost 200 frames...I lose my growth oreintaation. I see myself judging them through what I assume to be the critical eyes of others. This is what I hear myself saying there:

"I did not succeed at the goal! These pics are not enough! Maybe, I am not enough!There is too much space between the couple there.  He is too stiff and not relaxed enough...the light is not right...should have switched to shutter priority there...too many blurry shots for my liking...oh that light is not right...should have used side lighting rather than backlighting...should have used the other side of the reflector...should have brought her face down in that shot ...too much white of her eyes showing, not enough colour...should have brought her chin down more and turned her face a bit more toward the light...should have posed them this way...should have posed them that way...should have a few more pan shots to show the landscape....should have prompted more to encouraged playfulnees and relaxation etc..."

These are all very truthful realizations. Honest constructive criticism. And this is wonderful in the learning and growing sense of it all. Seeing our mistakes and knowing we can do better the next time is an amazing thing. That is learning! It is what we are here to do. This was a great photography lesson and I enjoyed the experience when I was shooting.  I was 100 percent there ( as a person...if not as a photographer lol). I served what was unfolding in front of me.

What is the problem then? 

If there is a problem in this example, it is that I recognize that I am still too attached to outcome in some of the creative jobs I take on.  I am still too concerned about societal expectations when it comes to meaningless roles or titles.  I am still too concerned about the opinions of others. Despite my practice, I can still be more goal oriented than growth oriented at times.

Ahhh! But there is learning here too, isn't there? 

Today I wake up and say, "In my photography, in any job Life offers me...today...I am going to focus, not so much on doing the job better, but on learning to be a better person doing it. I am going to strive to be better than I was yesterday in doing the best I can with this moment as it is unfolding.  I am going to use this job to grow a little more today...be a little closer to Higher Self than I was yesterday. " 

Enjoy every moment of your life by doing the best that you can with it as it is unfolding...

That is why we are here...to grow...not to achieve goals or meet expectations we or others have of us.

All is well.

Michael A. Singer/ Temple of the Universe/ Sounds True ( September, 2025) Doing the Best You Can-The path to Liberation.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zMRh2_UU1Uo&list=PLyOuAoSmZkKoESr2acNWwhznusbBkKXsT&index=1

Truth and Reconcilliation Day

  

Truth and Reconcilliation 

As your ancestors 

cry out to be heard

through the chaos 

that makes up 

this world of  lost, 

busy and greedy minds,

a world too many still cling to 

with white knuckles and heavy breath

as if it is the only reality,

my ancestors 

bow their head in shame

within me.

I feel the heaviness 

of their shoulders 

dragging mine  down

away from  ears

 full of the echoed cries of children,

of  lost women, 

of brave souls

mortally wounded by broken promises 

and exhumed from  the sandy depths 

of someone else's

unconsciousness. 

These ancestors within me

cry out for forgiveness

as they see clearly 

what they could not see

when they walked around in forms

that felt so righteous

 in their taking 

of that which was never theirs. 

The red, once proudly worn 

with national pride,

is replaced with the saffron

worn by those 

who have achieved 

the sight of truth

few will ever achieve 

in this busy world.

Though my form 

that carries the sins of my fathers

may never be worthy 

to wear such a cry for forgiveness,

I do so with the hope

of healing for all. 

© Dale-Lyn, July, 2021

We evolve as individual humans and as a race by learning to accept all that is. That acceptance includes accepting collective energy that created pain and suffering for others, Samskaras can be collective and intergenerational,  I believe. We can not push down these truths just because they are uncomfortable. We must accept the discomfort as we encourage these samskaras to come to the surface, be seen, be felt, and then released in a way that serves all best. This day is allotted to doing just that.

All is well. 

The Shining One

 The background, the reality, of everyone is that same Eternal, Ever Blessed, Ever Pure, and Ever Perfect One. It is the Atman, the Soul, in the saint, and in the sinner, in the happy and the miserable, in the beautuful and the ugly, in men and in animals; it is the same throughout. It is the shining One.

Vivekananda

Diversion or Higher Ideal Pursuit?

 

It is not enough to see or understand clearly. The future will be shaped in teh areana of human activity, by those willing to comit their minds and their bodies to the task.

Robert Kennedy

I focus on seeing and undersatnding clearly. I am making this yogic purification so the shakti flow of love, joy ( probably aiming more for peace) can flow through ...my life objective.  I am seeking this "higher ideal" of seeing God in everything...my major purpose to Life.  I am seeking to grow through life experience, accepting Life as it is.  I am allowing Life to do what it does.  I see all the pain around me...I feel that frustration that comes with not being able to "fix" it all...and at the same time I know it isn't mine to fix. I feel it all!

At teh same time I am "actively" doing.  Is my activity part of me embracing this purpose or is it a diversion away from it? 

I am "doing" a lot. I am not attached to outcome...I really am not. I do sooo much....so many projects I am enjoying ( or not enjoying) that I am absorbed in.  I spend my days writing...here but also outside of here.  I am getting two books in a "You Can Write" series for young writers up and that is a time consuming activity. But it is fun...in a weird way.  It took me  over six hours to figure out how to change the headers for each chapter.  Now, I am struggling to figure out how to get the page numbers to flow. Crazy. But I get absorbed in that activity. It takes me away. Diversion or higher ideal pursuit? 

 I am also knitting blankets for each of the grandkids...I look forward to getting to that each evening. It is soothing. And when I knit I dont care about perfection....if half way though I realize that I made a boo-boo...I will, without too much thought, unravel the whole thing and begin again. I tell myself...it is all in the learning and growing as a knitter. I get absorbed again into each stitch. Diversion or higher ideal pursuit?

I am shooting  a bit too.Yesterday I did an engagement photoshoot for my daughter. I usually hate shooting people!!! I always screw up because I like to shoot what is beyond the images and the appearances they wish for me to create. I want to shoot "what is". I hate posing people...Normally, I like to shoot nature, animals, children because it is so natural...I can lose myself in that. I don't mind shooting candid shots of people.  But posed shots...yuck.  Yesterday I did a "pro" shoot (and I am far, far from a pro lol)...and I realized after a few of the posed shots the desire to create an image fell away and I began shooting what is.  As I was shooting that even though it wasn't the type of photography I like to do...I was totally in the moment and I was trying to capture what was there.  I lost attachment to outcome. I was just going to shoot whatever was happening in front of me regardless of how it turned out...told myself I would worry about that later in Lightroom.. So much so that I forgot to pay attention to the details...like what apeture I was shooting at, the best use of the natural light, the best use of the reflector, the best prompts for the couple to show  what they would be happy with later. I prompted them but it was far from professional prompting. I just shot the way I shoot...what was there...what came naturally to my eye. There was so much beauty in them and the world around us...even in those imperfections I picked up. So I shot and I shot and I shot.  Diversion or higher ideal pursuit?

In the last 72 hours I also did up more videos, created more deep relaxation guides ( for me mostly though I offered them to the public).  I dealt with some crap around here and I applied for a job. ( which requires a lot of work-resumes, cover letters etc) . Not really attached to any outcome. Diversion? Higher ideal pursuit?

I have to ask...am I distracting from real life when I go to these activities...are they simply an escape, a diversion from this "problematic life" going on around me...or am I more alive doing these things...being in those moments  of purposeful? or  purposeless? activity that allows time to just pass without the problems of others in the way...without the need for a certain outcome? I mean I get the outcome with each of these things...I finish my books and end up with copies in my hands.  I end up with many pics...some of them really good...many not...some awful even. I have another entry added to my blog every day.  I end up with so many videos a week...now have a lot of guided relaxation practices that are helping me with my relaxation/meditation practice. ( I am not spending as much time as I am used to in complete silence). My grandkids will have new blankets at Christmas. I may or may not get a job but I put myself out there again...my resume is updated.

Hmm!

I was in each and everyone of these activities 100 % each time I was there. All of these "give" in someway back to the world.  They help me to share the weird and imperfect gifts and skills I have with the world in some way- sometimes it is with, practical assistance (learning and education tools), sometimes with encouragement and motivation, other times with " deep truth", and still other times a reflection of the beauty I see (photos, poems etc)...I think, maybe, Shakti, spirit...flows a little bit more freely when I am "engaged" in these things then it does when I perceive myself stuck under the weight of other people's problems. Maybe these activities show me what is "real" in Life more than the other does. Hmm!

Is all this activity diversion or a pursuit for the higher ideal? I don't know yet. 

All is well

The Barefacts of the Moment

 Just give attention to the barefacts of the moment...

Eckhart Tolle

Seems so simple...yet it is not.  We keep slipping away from this "higher ideal" as Vivekananda called it. To be able to see the moment for what it is beyond everything the story telling personality does with it and more importantly to see the perfection of Source in all of it...is not always easy.  We tend to fail and fall back into personal mind and ego's drama again and again.

That's okay. Vivekanada encouraged:

...never mind these failures, these backslidings; hold the ideal a thousand times, and if you fail a thousand times, make the attempt once more. Vivekananda

We need to embrace what is as it is because the Divine exists in that. The drama of little "me", these stories we create around the "suchness", the "isness" of Life pull us away from experiencing the perfect moment.  They take us away from seeing God in everything.

He has hidden Himself inside the atom... the Ancient One who resides in the inner most recess of every human heart. Vivekananda

We need to stay conscious in every moment, not lost in the character roles we are playing, not lost in the drama, the stories the personality writes as we go along. We can do this no matter how challenging or dramatic our circumsatnces seem to be. 

...if you had to starve, you can also starve consciously

Bring vigalence to the inner state so you no longer believe the outer state is more important than the inner state. Tolle

The inner state is everything!!! It exists in this moment...here and now...beyond story, beyond the narrative, the drama. Seek it! Honor it! For it is there where God can be found.

All is well.

Eckhart Tolle (July, 2025) How to Stay Conscious in Difficult Moments.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9LkxMBxSgtc

Swami Vivekananda(n.d.) Complete Works. Kindle

The Personality and Who We Really Are: More Wisdom from Alan Watts

 

I am thee. All is Thine. Thy Will be done.

I listened to Alan Watts this morning and it helped me to reflect deeper on my thoughts about personality and that which we really are. 

I love his take on personality.

This you that you take so seriously...this ego, this personality...what is it? Where did it come from? 

If you look for it, it is rather elusive. It is a collection of memories, a bundle of desires and fears, a certain pattern of behavior. It is a story you tell yourself and others about who you are. "I am a person who likes this and dislikes that. I am someone who did this and failed to do that". It is a concept, a thought. And like all thoughts, it is fleeting. It has no solidity. You cannot locate it in the body.

Once we see beyond this personality we come to terms with who we really are.

What you call "me" is something the universe is doing right here and right now. It is a temporary dancing pattern, a gesture and like a gesture in the air it is fundamentally empty..

When you don't take your ego so seriously, a wonderful thing happens...you begin to relax. The constant low grade anxiety of having to protect this fragile fictional self begins to dissolve. You can afford to be more spontaneous. You can afford to be foolish. You can afford to make mistakes. 

We can learn to simply be ourselves. Not the idea of ourselves, but the living, breathing immediate reality of ourselves.

So much of our lfe energies are built around building, maintaining and defending these personalities ...this overidentification with the roles we are playing that we don't live the lives we are meant to live. We suffer. It doesn't have to be that way. When we get beyond "me", we can be free.

When you are no longer defending a fragile self image you become incredibly strong. Criticism doesn't shatter you, failure doesn't define you, success doesn't inflate you. You can flow with circumstances. You can adapt. You can be like water which is soft and yielding, yet which can eventually wear away the hardest rock. This is not passivity. This is supreme intelligence. It is action which is in accord with the total situation, not just with your narrow, selfish desire. It is the action of the whole universe expressing itself through you.

Going from self to Self is freedom from obligation and unworthiness.

You do not need permission to be. You do not need to earn the right to be here. You are here because you are here. 

It is freedom from exhausting struggle

You don't try. Trying is the energy of the seperate ego, the energy of seriousnesse ...any effort to become something is a rejection of what you already are...which is the energy of the cosmos.

It is a better use of the energy  within us.

When you are not wasting energy definding an idea of yourself, ou have immense energy for Life

It is an invitation for faith and trust to replace fear.

Trust yourself, trust your own nature, and the nature of which you are a part

Getting beyond personality to Who We Truly Are is free of obligation.

Your only obligation, if there is one, is to be true to the deepest truth of your being...that you are a unique, irreplacebale temporary expression of the whole universe...and the universe is not serious. It is playful. It is joyful. It is a great cosmic game of hide and seek where it is both the hider and the seeker. So, go on play, experiment. Be foolish. Be magnificent. Fail gloriously. Succeed lightly. Love. Lose. Feel it all. ..You...you are the music; you are the dance.

Remember who You Are.

All is well

Alan Watts & Wisdom (September, 2025) Don't Take life Too Seriously. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GrLObPkEnsM

Letting Go to the Playful Flow of Life: Wisdom from Alan Watts

The call is to let go...to join the dance that has been going on for billions of years, to sing the song that is already singing itself through you

Just yesterday I posted a video about letting go, and this morning I opened to this beautiful wisdom from Alan Watts about letting go to the playful flow of Life.

To many of us take life too seriously, don't we? We fail to enjoy the felt experience of in this here and now. As a writer, (one of my many false roles that I am getting less and less attached to) I loved this analogy.

We are like people reading a novel. Who are only interested in getting to the last page. And so we skim. We turn the pages frantically, missing all the poetry, all the drama, all the lovely descriptions just to see how it turns out. Then when we get there, we close the book and say, "Is that all?"

The whole point of the book was in the reading, in the living through it.

This is what happens when life becomes a problem to be solved, rather than a reality to be experienced.

We are so busy measuring life we forget to live it....

We need to let go of our need to measure Life, rush Life, figure It out, control It, or struggle against It.  We need to let go of this idea that Life is a hard and serious thing we must learn to maneuve. Yes, as I have discovered again and again, Life can be serious and pretty darn challenging at times.  That doesn't mean we have to be serious in our response to It. 

You can play a serious game without taking it seriously.

We do not need to take it so seriously. Letting go is letting go of this seriousness.

The true opposite of taking Life seriously is to see it as play...to see the Universe itself as fundamentally playful.

Look at nature. Does it look serious to you? ...look at a kitten chasing its tail...waves lapping against the shore...do they look like they are on a grim mission? Do the clouds look they are filled with existential dread? No, they are simply playing...they are expressing themselves.

Wu Wei is effortless action. 

It doesn't mean doing nothing...it means acting without straining...without forcing. It is the way of water....it does not strive, it simply flows and in that flowing it accomplsihes everything.

Life is also not something we have to spend all our energy figuring out. We do not strive to awaken to truth...we enjoy the process of awakening here and now.

The world is not something you have to figure out. It is something to be tasted, touched, heard, and seen. You are not a passenger in the universe, being taken for a ride. You are the universe experiencing itself.

Wu Wei can often be translated to mean purposelessness or effortless action. Life is not about strain, struggle, effort to get somewhere up ahead...to get to the ending of the great novel so we have all the answers.  It is about enjoying and experiencing each page we read, each moment we live here and now. It is about going with the flow of Life and trusting it will take us to where we need to be, enjoying the ride as we travel along. 

So, your only obligation if there is one is to be true to the deepest truth of your being...that you are a unique, irreplacebale temporary expression of the whole universe...and the universe is not serious. It is playful. It is joyful. It is a great cosmic game of hide and seek where it is both the hider and the seeker. So, go on play, experiement. Be foolish. Be magnificent. Fail gloriously. Succeed lightly. Love. Lose. Feel it all. But whatever you do, don't miss the show by being too busy looking for the meaning behind it. The meaning is in the music.  The meaning is in the dance. And you...you are the music; you are the dance.

Learn to Let Go!

All is well.

Alan Watts & Wisdom ( September, 2025) Don't Take Life Too Seriously. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GrLObPkEnsM

How is Your Life Treating You, and Your Personality?

 

Who am I? Not the body, because it is decaying; not the mind, because the brain will decay with the body; not the personality, nor the emotions for these will also vanish with death.

Ramana Maharshi

I was recently asked by a good friend I hadn't seen in a while, "How's your life treating you?"

And I casually answered, like I tend to do, "Oh great. Everything's fine. You?" 

In actuality I wanted to say, "Man. My life is hard! I ain't happy with it!" 

I thought about that question again when I woke up this morning, to the news that some very unconscious people are using whatever they can against my son to gain the control they feel they lost over a situation they were so sure they could manipulate and control. If I thought their actions were based on genuine concern for the well being of those they are professing it is for...I would be more understanding and compassionate...but I see so clearly what the motivation is. 

The key player in all this is someone who doesn't even have legal rights. It is her narrative she is trying to protect; it is she who wants to control this situation...to come out on top of it...to "win". Why? So she can protect her very sick and toxic personality that is professing to the world that it is the rescuer, the saviour, and she does so through lying, manipulating, controlling, bullying, slandering, and harrassing while making others into villains. I feel sick to my stomach when I think of her and what she is trying to do...all the while proposing to be so "Christian", so kind, and giving,when she is anything but.  I see her personality disorder so clearly. She is personality-sick but unfortunately she was able to convince her loved ones through her manipulation tactics that she is the healthiest one, the sole holder of the truth and knowledge in this situation. Sigh!

At the same time I am dealing with the extreme "in your face drama" of another individual with a personality disorder that lives here. The epitome of unconscious, self-preserving pain body too often stares me down.  And man, does that suck. It weighs on me.  Even though I can stay calm, and cool headed through all the drama, my body still seems to soak it all up and it gets stored in my gut, in my muscles and in my heart. What comes from this personality is nasty stuff. It literally makes me sick.

There must be some learning I am supposed to gain in this confrontation with personality disorders.  There has to be.That is why, maybe, they are in my life now when I am working so dillegently on dismantling my attachment to my own personality and contemplating this thing called "my" life. 

I see how nasty personality is and how it causes suffering. Personality, regardless if it is considered "harmless" by society's terms or toxic and socially destructive, is not a healthy thing to identify with.  It isn't who we are. Yet, it is so challenging for many humans to see that the personality they spend their lives creating and protecting is a useless, often harmful, illusion they created with their own resisting minds.

Now...I know I am not in a position to judge anyone for their personalities. If I see something nasty in another, I know that nasty thing is in this "me". Others are simply reflecting and I am simply projecting. Truth is, as all of us are, I have in the past, or have the potential to do so in the future the very things I am having a hard time accepting in them.  I mean I did a lot of work...a lot of work on my own narcissitic tendencies and I have come far but I am nowhere near the point where I can judge other people for theirs. Until they are evolved, all humans have a tendency toward narcissicism and unwholesome actions directed toward others in an attempt to protect these illusions they see as reality.  I am not above that.

I also get through the day reminding myself, "They know not what they do!" I tell myself they cannot see the nastiness of their own personalities and the effect it has on others. They, therefore, cannot take accountability for what those personalities do. Sigh!

How do you get through to others when the personality, the armour they wear to protect themselves and are constantly shining and polishing so others can be dazzled by the shine,  has become their second skin....it is fused to them. It also seems to seperate them from others. Like a semi-permeable membrane, it makes them very selective as to what can come in. They blame others when anything in Life slipps through. What goes out, however, is another matter. They have little to no problem, it seems, bleeding, or sweating all over anyone else, without concern for the toxic effect of what they are spewing. 

Personalities suck!

Is this "me" as awful as what I am observing in others.  It has the potential to be...for sure...so I need to work extra hard to to get past personality in myself and others to the greater Self. Sigh!

"My" Life?

Anyway, as I deal with all this drama directed towards others or brought to my attention, I question what this thing is that I call "my" life. "Me", "mine", and "my" are concepts that have to go too, along with personality.  They don't serve.

But when my friend asked me that question, I also wanted to say..."I right now don't have a perception of a "my life".  This life, I have been given, is simply absorbed and buried under the lives of everyone around me."

 This human I call "me" has no real issues other than some financial things and a few little health issues...nothing big...She should be embracing and enjoying this time she has on Earth. Why isn't she? She is absorbed in everyone's else's problems, challenges, and dramas...When I describe my challenges...they are all related to the challenges others are having in their lives.  "My problems" are really not "mine", they are everyone else's problems that I have taken on and made my own. "My life" is not my own...I have given it up to everyone else... like I am one of those velcro targets just meant for other people's stuff to stick to. 

I really have no big problems in life. I have learned to cope and chill with pretty well anything Life throws my way...What I identify as "problems" have to do with other people's life coping...not my own.  I see "problem" in "my life"  when others who I care about cannot cope or chill with what life has given them. If they cannot cope with it...I feel, for some strange reason, I must cope with it for them. I take it on.

Wow! That was an eye opening realization. Must explore that farther later.

No "My" to Life

Anyway...there is no "my" to life. I know that. It is just life...but this human has an opportunity to explore this life...embrace it...experience it. I would answer my friend now if I could,

"Life is treating me as fairly as it it treats us all.  Grateful for that...I am learning some wonderful things about personality right now.  Interesting. I am also  learning that my felt experience of It is being complicated by the fact that I insist on living other people's lives for them instead of just living what I ahve been given to live. I guess, I will have to do something about that. Thanks for asking."

All is well in my world.

That Which Shines in Thee...I am That

 Thou sun, who hast covered the Truth with the golden disc, do thou remove the veil, so that I may see the Truth that is within thee. I have known the  Truth that is within thee, I have known what is the real meaning of thy rays and the glory and have seen That which shines in thee, and That which is within thee is within me, and I am That"

Vivekananda's recitation of a phrase from the last chapter of Shukla Yajurveda: the Isha Upanishads 

Basically what this is expressing is a recogniton of a truth...the Truth- of who we are.

Alan Watts says it is the recognition that

 the small controlled version of yourself is preventing your larger, more authentic Self from emerging.

We spend so much of our lives thinking we are something we are not and putting great struggle and effort into maintaining that image...that small controlled version...that we end up resisting what Life is here to show us or teach us. We fail to experience Who we are and why we are here.

Vivekananda also tells us:

They grope in darkness who worship this  ignorant world that is produced out of ignorance, thinking of it as Existence, and those who live their whole lives in this world, and never find anything better or higher, are groping in still greater darkness.

When we start to relax into the flow of Life...accept it, be present for, experience it and be curious about it ...rather than struggling in this false idea that we are here to control it (when obviously we cannot), things change. We begin to see Who we truly are.

This intelligence that you are partenering with [when you surrender to Life] isn't foreign to you. It's not some external diety pulling strings from above. It's teh same awareness taht's reading these words right now, the same presence that has been looking out through your eyes your entire life, only now It recognizes ItSelf. You begin to sense the seamless continuity between your inner awareness and the awareness that seems to permeate everything...begin dancing who you actually are. Watts

And as Vivekananda also says, 

But he who knows the secret of nature, seeing That which is beyond nature through teh help of nature, he crosses death, and through teh help of That which is beyond nature, he enjoys Eternal Bliss.

All is well.

Alan Watts & Wisdom (September, 2025) The More You Learn to Let Go, The More Life Gives You.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HMEpBMwl6Zg

Vivekananda (n.d.) 2.57 Jnana Yoga. The Complete Works of Vivekananda. Kindle Edition

Dealing With Pain Body's Maya

 Give it up; the world we have been thinking of so long, the world to which we have been clinging so long, is a false world of our own creation. Give that up; open your eyes and see that as such it never existed; it is a dream, Maya.

Vivekananda

I uttered those word to someone last evening ( in a paraphrased form) who was in the height of an extreme reaction to my sharing that I will be moving 30 minutes away. The reaction was dramatic and extreme...to say the least...like it usually is when change threatens the false protective world she created around her and to which she clings with white knuckles in hope it will provide some semblance of comfort and safety for this idea she has of who she is. Once those walls begin to rumble and shake (and it doesn't take much to make walls built on sand rumble and shake...so they rumble a lot)...she spits out a hatred, blame, negativity that is as toxic as sulphuric acid towards me. How dare I make her world rumble? How dare I disturb her comfort zone? She is, after all, sick, she reminds whoever will hear and especially herself, and I am responsible somehow for making her sick etc.  I, therefore, owe her my complete and utter devotion etc etc. Anything less than that and I am "mean", "cruel", "unloving" etc. She threatens to hurt herself and tells me I am responsible for it. I drove her to it. I am to blame for her unhealthy choices...each and every one of them. 

Sigh! 

This is what it is like living with someone with Borderline Personality Disorder. Her pain is real...there is no doubt about that. She has the epitomy of what Eckhart Tolle refers to as the "pain body". 

Eckhart Tolle defines the pain body as an energetic field of old accumulated emotional pain-both personal and collective-that resides in an individual's mind and body. It is driven by an unconscious need to survive and feeds on unhappiness, manifesting as intense anger, sadness, or fear and often resulting in self-sabotaging behaviours. The pain body thrives when we identify with it, but it can be dissolved by bringing conscious awarenes and presence to it, observing it without judgement. (From AI overview of Tolle's definition)

I wonder how Marsha Linehan (the founder of DBT, a treatment modality she developed for treating BPD) views that definition. It seems bang on to me from both the psychological and the spiritual standpoint. 

Her pain  body is old accumulated energy from a past ...a story she clings to with all her might and even adds to, fabricates, and rearranges to create a justifyable "reason" for her pain body's reaction and behaviours in the present. There is definitely pain there that she stuffed and stored...that she repressed and surpressed so deeply creating doozies of samskaras to which she sees as who she is, and to which she spends her life keeping down. She uses most of her focus, her energy to organize the world around her so precicesly that these things never get triggered. Refusing to accept the ebb and flow of life, the natural unpredictability of it, the vastness of it...the reality of it...she creates a very limited and unreal version to hide her pain body within. And from there she feeds it and lets it grow.  It has become who she thinks she is. 

And I...a recovering pain body...a person who can finally see beyond the pain body in this human I call "me" and the pain body in others am no longer pulled into that drama her's creates. Her pain body feels threatened by my detachment to it and convinces her of her worse fear...that I am not only abandoning her, I am tearing down the walls of her comfort zone. Pain body grows with this fear and she reacts...very, very dramatically. 

There was a time I would have so quickly gotten pulled into that drama...where I too would have fed her pain body...with what seemed like my very soul....anything to soothe it. There was a time I didn't make the distinction between a being and their human "pain body".  Now, I see that distinction so clearly.  I know when I look at her that she isn't her pain body...it is just something she has and something she feeds.  I know she is much more than it, than her diagnosis, than her past, than her choices and circumstances... I can see who she is beyond it and how bright her Life can be if she lets go of that Maya to which she clings so tightly. I tell her that (not in those words exactly...but you know.).

That doesn't go over very well, let me tell ya. lol. Pain body puffs up and blows up in an attempt to appear bigger and all emcompassing when it is threatened by Truth.  It doesn't want me seeing that she isn't it...more than anything it doesn't want her seeing that she isn't it. It doesn't want her discovering that if she stopped clinging to it and the lies it spews, if she stopped feeding it and identifying as it...if she stood away and just observed it...pouring conscious awareness and presence on it from the Seat of Who She Really Is...pain body would shrink to nothing....eventually. 

But atlas...he isn't ready for that truth. And I, from this end, can no longer soothe or feed her version of reality as she continues to identify with pain body. I don't get lost in the drama anymore.  I don't react. She sees my cool detachment as me "not loving her", "not caring", "being mean and cruel" (and all sorts of other names I will not share here :) ) Still...I don't get pulled in. My conscious awareness, my presence is doing the observing now. I see pain body and I see her.  I bypass pain body again and again in our communications to speak directly to her. I tell her I love her and I see her. I remind her that though I see and feel her pain...I believe she isn't her pain, her diagnosis, her choices, her circumstances. I encourage her to get the help she needs to get "through" her pain...that there is nothing I want more than her happiness and well being...that I will support her in getting the help she needs but she has to be willing to get help.

When I do that her pain body puffs up with all the reasons why she can't get help and why it is then my responsibility to fix her and to let it do what it does. I simply speak to her again and tell her..."This is your life.  It is you that must do the work of getting through this "pain experience"...all I can do is support you and love you through it when you are ready...."I didn't break it and I can't fix it." "

I also remind her that her pain body has no right to hurt other people.  Though I understand it, no one has to be a victim of it. So, she cannot expect me...or anyone else... to be abused by it. I tell her she is responsible for her Life, no one else. 

Then, I will hug her...if she lets me...and I tell her I will love her and see her beauty no matter what she does. I walk away. 

Though I remain, for the most part, in higher awareness during these situations...I automatically fall back there to Seat of Objective Observer when I notice the reaction starting...it is still very draining and exhausting for this human I call "me" to be dealing with this all the time. It is a challenge. A challenge I am slowly mastering. 

I have learned so much, though, through this life challenge.  I have grown so much. For that I am very grateful.

All is well. 

Raising the Vibration

 

It is all pure light shimmering...

All physical form is shakti...all energy vibrating at different rates

Everything in this world is energy vibrating at different frequencies. Do you get that yet?

So every circumstance, every thing a person says or does in our direction, every "thing" is just energy coming in.  It is a form of Shakti.  Shakti is high energy: etheral and light...like light. If energy is high enough it can go through your body...it can flow right through.

Then why do things get blocked inside us? What blocks or stops shakti?

Singer tells us the high energies can't flow through because of the lower energy blockages we create with our personal mind and our emotions. We have taken shakti and made it denser with our focus on it, with our clinging, our averting, our judement. We have used the high energy of shakti, lowered it, condensed it, and then use it against ourselves by making blockages that  block the high energy from flowing through us. 

..to get to a higher vibration rate you have to make it through lower vucbrations you created. 

I am seeing that everything has a vibration of shakti within it (everything is shakti) and these phenomena our senses pick up come into our awareness differently. With our 'personal minds' we judge each of these as pleasant, unpleasnat, or neutral. Any judgement other than neutral condenses shakti and we then lower that shakti, bring it down into its dense form and store it inside. Visually I can see it being pulled down into the root chakra where all this concentrated and condensed shakti wraps around the base of the spine. So teh natural flow of shakti within can not flow freely upward and out of us as it is meant to do. I don't know...that is just how I visualize it. 

I see judgement as a selectively permeable membrane personal mind uses to push away (and down) some shakti containining phenomena and to grasp and cling to other.

We use our will to slow down the higher vibration of what was coming in through our senses to make it dense enough to block shakti.

The energy that came in is not unhealthy...what we do with it is. Anger, for example, by itself is not un healthy but we lower the vibration of it with our judging miond...and it becomes the  blocked shakti.Eveything wants to come up and be released...from the base of the spine to the higher chakras.

Your mind and your heart does not want that samskara in there...it is trying to purify...so it keeps pushing it back up

Yoga is all about allowing this shakti to become unbound, to be freed and in order to do that we need to purify from that which is blocking it...our samskaras.

When consciousness merges with shakti=Chit Shakti= yoga

Singer reminds us that we  can dance at every single level of vibration

Every single situation you experience in a day is an opportunity to let go....

The reaason you take birth is to go back up with less than you came down with...

Purification is key...

All is well.

Michael Singer/ Temple of the Universe/ Sounds True (September, 2025) The Dance of Shakti: Conscious Energy and Liberation. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vmhtc-1Vn5M&list=PLyOuAoSmZkKoESr2acNWwhznusbBkKXsT&index=3