Because believing that the dots will connect down the road will give you the confidence to follow your heart even if it leads you off the well worn path.
Steve Jobs https://www.azquotes.com/quotes/topics/connecting-the-dots.html
I guess what I do here... is connect dots? Connect dots between all the snippets of learning I come across from great mentors and teachers, from my life experience, from the poetry that spills out of me and from my own inner reflections.
So I am going to connect the dots between the video I seen with David Bohm and Krishnamutri , the videos I watched lately with Tara Brach, my reading of Radical Acceptance, as well as all the others I read recently including The Three Magic Words & A Complaint Free World, from all I learned from the teachings of Eckhart Tolle over the years, A Course in Miracles ( have to get onto the next ten lessons, don't I?) and The Tao Te Ching, and all the great dharma talks that were originally derived from Thich Nhat Hanh that I have encountered, especially this last one I listened to ( see below). This little quote, (supposedly but not for sure, from Lao Tzu)...connects all beautifully.
Watch your thoughts; they become your words;
watch your words, they become your actions;
watch your actions, they become your habits;
watch your habits, they become your character;
watch your character, that becomes your destiny.
Lao Tzu ?
It is truly all about the thinking isn't it? If we want to transform and change our lives or the world...we need to first begin by understanding what is happening in our minds...more specifically what we are thinking, watering and believing.
In a dharma talk from a practiced student of Thich Nhat Hanh, Thay Phap Dang...the same truths cited above in Lao Tzu's teaching... is offered in a beautiful Buddhist perspective. The teachings here center around the idea of needing to recognize our behaviours so we can trace them back to their roots for better understanding. We need to understand in order to sublimate the negative behaviours for positive and thus change the way we perceive, relate, feel and experience our emotions, and cement "belief" in our psyches.
Most of us are living on "auto pilot" going through Life directed by our habit minds, not really conscious of what we are doing and not experiencing Life in a full and healthy way. We do not see a problem so we do not see the solution...but there is a solution: transformation.
How do we Transform?
First step Notice what the Mind is Doing?
We need to notice, first of all, any 'unhealthy' or 'un beneficial' behavioural traits that are strong in us. Thay Phap Dang offers these for example of the many we can develop a tendency for: aversion, attachment, reactivity, domination/control, envy/jealousy, anger, doubt, destructiveness, negative thinking, sensuality/passion seeking, and judgment/criticism. These things do not serve us or the world. When they become firm in us they block the way to understanding our true positive nature and potential.
Once we see these traits n ourselves we recognize that they create our personality, our habitual pattern of living that we sometimes get so attached to, seeing ourselves as these separate and unique selves or egos. Ego is just an idea we have of self...an identification with our behaviours and our behaviours are both our actions and our thoughts.
Our behaviours , according to this teacher, is just habit energy which is comes from impulses ( a neural pathway) when latent energy is triggered and the mind consciousness now has new growth in it from seeds that were once stored in stored consciousness.
Those seeds that were once stored dormant in store consciousness have become the personality traits of aversion/attachment, reactivity, domination and control etc etc. By watering we allow the energy to be released ( and it is all just energy) and to grow/travel up through the mind, latent energy and along the neural pathway to become our impulses, then our habit energy which becomes our behaviour. Our personality is just our behaviours that we express to the world. It is not, however, who we truly are!
Second Step: Wisdom and Insight
We can practice transforming our behaviours that do not serve into behaviours that do by enlisting the help of wisdom or the "clear mind" which is like a "light saber" that can cut through the negative behaviour in a process of "looking deeply". We recognize and shine the light on that which we are thinking and doing that does not serve. This wisdom is a light of tranquility, calmness and concentration.
We can develop and enhance this wisdom and insight through a practice. The teacher in this video tells us that the practice includes taking refuge in a teacher or mentor; being sincerely and honestly open to share our vulnerability and our lack of knowing; detaching from body and mind's need for pleasure; maintaining virtue and learning the dharma well; by being energetic and diligent in our desire to diminish suffering in the world; by being mindful of how we outwardly express ourselves...making what we say count and avoiding rambling, complaining and pointless talking; and finally by being willing to look and see the human mind for everything it is by going inward.
Of course, this is just my summary of the video...more or less a regurgitation of what was said. Please watch it yourself if you want to have a better understanding of it.
My point is ...it all connects doesn't it...all this learning?
Anyway, all is well!
Plum Village ( July 24, 2016) Behaviour and Wisdom-Summer Retreat-2016- Thay Bhap Dang
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7HJhVCwIwME
Tuesday, July 14, 2020
Monday, July 13, 2020
Delivery
Delivery
I do not know what tomorrow will bring,
Maybe more of what today dropped at my door,
or something completely different,
will arrive in another brown unmarked box
or a bubble wrapped envelope with my name on it.
I can't control what it will be.
I spend so many moments,
searching through the items
Life has to offer,
displayed
on my mind's never weary screen,
picking and choosing
that which will make things easier,
better , safer,
more pleasurable for me and my loved ones,
while I quickly click past the unwanted.
And though I kind of remember
what I ordered
as well as the promised dates of arrival,
and I wait with predicted knowing,
I am often surprised
by what shows up.
When I hear the familiar beeping
of the delivery truck
as it backs into my drive,
I will run to the window
and not wanting to appear
too eager or too desperate,
will hide somewhat sheepishly
behind the curtain
as I peer out.
From my veiled place,
I will strain to hear
the kind but tense
voice of the parcel carrier
as he gently reassures my barking dogs
that all is well,
and the plop of the parcel
as it unceremoniously
lands on my step.
And I will wait,
my heart beating excitedly
within my chest,
for him to drive away before
running to retrieve the package
that was left for me,
tearing it open as quick as I can....
anticipating, hoping...
but often ,
surprised
by what I find inside.
Sometimes I find
exactly what I ordered
beneath the scrunched up,
brown packing paper.
But more often I find
something different staring up at me;
sometimes smaller or uglier,
sometimes prettier or more grand
than what I thought
I was ordering.
Sometimes it is in the wrong colour
or the wrong size,
not fitting my frame and image
in the way I need it to.
Sometimes it is more spectacular
than the images on the screen
could ever be.
And Sometimes...
what I ordered
never arrives
and I will spend many hours
dealing with on line merchants,
searching for reasons why,
to no avail.
I will grieve the loss
of that which I never knew
and promise myself that
I will be more careful,
more diligent
in deciding who and what
to order from
the next time.
Hmmm!
I do not know what tomorrow will bring
but...
maybe, just maybe
I do not need to be so choosy,
so diligent and controlling
in the ordering process.
Maybe I can Let go...just a bit
and Let Life do the clicking.
Maybe, just maybe,
instead of hiding in the shadows
I can go out onto the step
when I hear the delivery truck
making its way to me.
I can hold out my hands
to receive the parcel
the tired carrier is holding
with a smile on my face;
I can even say thank you
and mean it
as I relieve him of his burden.
Maybe, just maybe,
I can remove the outer coverings
slowly and mindfully,
enjoying the sound of crinkling paper
and the pop and release of air
as I squeeze the bubble wrap
with my fingers .
And maybe, just maybe,
what I find inside will be
exactly what I need,
regardless of colour or size,
regardless if it is different than
the images in my mind
I was ordering from
and regardless if the package is empty
of the one thing I thought I needed.
Maybe, just maybe,
I can learn to trust that
Life delivers only
what is best for all.
© Dale-Lyn (Pen) July 2020
Inspired by :
Tara Brach ( May 2020)) Embracing Uncertainty-Sheltering in Love-Part IX https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fmGSCUb98Uw
Inspired by :
Tara Brach ( May 2020)) Embracing Uncertainty-Sheltering in Love-Part IX https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fmGSCUb98Uw
Knowledge and Letting Go
Let all go-
the big small middling
tall bigger really
the biggest and all
things--let all go
dear
so comes love.
e.e. Cummings
from Let it go https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/115198-let-it-go----the-smashed-word-broken-open-vow
This cumming's poem, which I heard for the first time in another great talk from Tara Brach ( see below) addresses two great ideas that have recently been poured into my mind ( or the universal mind that I just clicked into lol) . The ideas evolve around the need to put away conceptual knowledge for presence which is Love and therefor ( the second idea) be able to let go into the uncertainty of what is.
How did I come up with these ideas?
By listening...by listening, fully and deeply as Krishnamutri expresses we should do in one of these videos in order to get past the wall that acts as a thick impenetrable veil between the ego's version of reality and Self.... to two seemingly very different videos which are, in actuality, discussing the same thing....though terminology differs greatly.
Listening with Total Attention
I listened to an interesting but very circular discussion between David Bohm and Krishnamutri about the limiting nature of "knowledge"...and more importantly, our identification with this "knowledge" which to me ( though it may not have been defined as such) is the ego. The two had a very long winded back and forth, round about discussion on how our need to accumulate knowledge, believe we are that knowledge, creates a wall between our little self (egos) and our true Self. This "knowledge" prevents us from "knowing" that we are "Love and awareness". It is only when we tap into that essence or presence that comes with full attention/awareness that takes us into the moment of egoless no thought ( not the terminology used in the video) will we be able to truly absorb the truth.
Then today I listened to Tara Brach speak to the idea of Letting Go into uncertainty and insecurity. Though they may not seem to be linked, I instantly seen the connection between the two videos and felt , once again, the serendipitous nature of my happening upon these two videos. The key point in both videos was that Love and awareness is who we really are and once we , in the moment, get beyond "knowledge", which can truly be in the way of us seeing clearly, and adopt a "beginner's mind" we can let go into uncertainty, into "not knowing". Krishnamutri uses the practice of "listening" to allow that presence and essence to emerge. He tells Bohm that if he were able to listen fully and attentively to what Bohm had to say...there would be no thought while he was listening. His full attention would take him into that space and for a moment the wall would disappear. At one point in Tara Brach's video, she relays the story of a stressed meditation teacher who finds his ability to let go through...listening to the sounds around him. The point is...stilling ourselves, getting quiet and being mindful can help us to transcend the wall. Listen to stillness!
What we need to do is let go. Let go of our need for more knowledge, our need for judgments, our need for more roles to create an idea of self, our need to protect and defend these ideas (as the first lines in Cummings poem [ which I did not include here] allude to), and our need to fix and control the outside world so that we feel safe in it.
When we are able to let go, we can open up to what is. We can surrender into the uncertainty of this human experience. We will then feel the spacious "emptiness" of peace. The wall that Krishnamutri and David Bohm discussed in detail...will simple fade away if we can do that.
Hmmm! Something to think about.
All is well in my world.
Tara Brach ( May 2020)) Embracing Uncertainty-Sheltering in Love-Part IX https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fmGSCUb98Uw
J. Krishnamutri & David Bohm ( Jan 2014) Brockwood Park 1980-The Ending of time-Conversation 13. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AHWyxci5egg
And I wrote this back in May, 2018 : https://dale-lynwritin.blogspot.com/2018/05/steps-to-waking-up.html
And I wrote this back in May, 2018 : https://dale-lynwritin.blogspot.com/2018/05/steps-to-waking-up.html
Sunday, July 12, 2020
Dancing sunflowers- Reworked Version
I think of them,
bending gracefully
Their great majestic heads,
vibrant and reassuring,
offered up
so cheerfully
to the fluttering
and humming Life
that passes by.
I think of their long
through which
their Life force flows.
I see their broad leafs,
in my mind's eye...
extended outwardly,
ceaselessly asking
for more and more
of what is needed to
allow their beings
to grow and flourish
accepting
with shameless gratitude
nature's ever giving
bounty.
I imagine the roots,
I can not see,
extended deep below
the top soil
I breathe and
I find myself relaxing
and letting go
into the breeze of my own
little existence,
supported and fed by this body
that holds me upright.
Reaching out
for what is needed
to sustain me.
Blushing,
my shame of needing;
I slowly,
ever so slowly ,
to appreciate all that
lands on my
outstretched appendages,
trusting all
into that which will
within the sky.
Though I can not yet
see my own roots,
I imagine them there
extending
and reaching out
to the Source of everything.
I let go and do my best
to trust the
© Dale-Lyn, July 2020
Did I over-write here?
I could go at this again and again and again...my mind will always find a need for improvement. Will always find something that could be tweaked or reworked. The question is: When does the poet stop driving and just allow what is to be? Isn't that what it is all about?
Hmmm!
Did I over-write here?
I could go at this again and again and again...my mind will always find a need for improvement. Will always find something that could be tweaked or reworked. The question is: When does the poet stop driving and just allow what is to be? Isn't that what it is all about?
Hmmm!
Working a Poem
He drove his mind into the abyss where poetry is written.
-George Orwell
I have not really drove my mind anywhere near the place where the Great Poets hang out. The question is, should I be driving a little more?
Not a Poet
I am not a poet. I am just someone who writes poetry...heck...I really do not write it at this point. I really just allow it to come out. I am fully aware...in the eyes of the poetically wise who judge and evaluate ...some poems that come out here would basically just "suck!"
I mean I love poetry and have studied it at the university level. I have a gut reaction to certain poems and at the same time I have a mind that analyzes and judges the merit of a poem on "how well it is written". I don't do that with my poems and I do not put them out there to be judged...just read. I really don't see them as "mine", just something that comes through me. I am not really, consciously at least, behind the wheel.
Do I Want to Be Seen as a Poet?
I guess, I do not want to interfere with this "me" less function. It is just pretty cool to allow it and observe it happening. Yet, at the same time I recently have this pull to do up chapbooks and get them out there. This pull to be published does not make sense being that I see myself as more of a "plopper -downer", than a poet, like the ones I have studied.
I usually just plop the poem down if it comes out here and leave it the way it is with maybe a few minor tweaks here and there, if I notice anything especially glaring...but I don't necessarily work the poem. I feel like more of a transcriptionist than a poet lol.
The question arises: Do I want to see myself and be seen as a poet? And if I do...is that a higher level motivation or a lower level?
Either way, to elevate myself into the poet status...I need to "drive the mind into the abyss" and start working the poems that just "come-out". Do I want to drive?
Do I want to get behind the wheel?
If I do that, am I interfering with something greater than ego desire? I question: If it was something higher coming through me...why would it come out so imperfectly? Or are they perfectly imperfect...the way it was intended?
What is my real role here? Am I to use this mind I have been given and drive into the place a so called poet goes? Am I to tweak these poems/ I look at this one I posted yesterday, for example, and say..."Wow! That isn't great!" Should I try to make it better...and if so, at whose judgment will "better" be?
Not that it has to be great or good even...but maybe it can be better than what it is...maybe I can learn to be a poet, rather than just someone who spits words embarrassingly out on the page when someone or something pushes a button at my core. right now, I am kind of like a verbal Pez container. Maybe , instead, I can actually use the mind I have been given to spruce the few lines that get splattered on the page up to make them "real " poems. Would that be helpful or would it be getting in the way of a natural creative process?
Why or why not would I work a poem?
Redeemer Ego likes the idea of me working the poems to meet some "other approved status." It likes the idea of me being recognized as a "real poet"...having another label to hide the holes and cracks appearing everywhere lately.
To do so, I must slip back into judging what comes out here in terms of good or bad. Redeemer would like to take responsibility and credit for whatever comes out of me if it is considered "good" by others standards and blame someone or something else if it is "bad" . It thinks of "my" reputation, how "I" appear. It wants "me" noticed so it is willing to put effort into repairing "my" image . "Maybe if you tweak this poem," it says. "You might get recognized as a poet."
Do I want to appease Redeemer ego...mine or others for the sake of another label I can place on my cracked exterior? No !
Besides:
"What if I fail?" Shamer ego pops up, "What if I can't make them better with my prepping and preening? What if I make them worse? At least when I just plop them down...there is no pressure to create something reader worthy...it really isn't about me at all. I am just an opening to something within. It is not a job...I am simply like the canister of a Bic Pen that allows the ink to come out when someone clicks the top. I do not need to put any effort into or be blamed for what comes out.
If I consciously work it, I will have to take responsibility for the less than good poetry. " Am I ready for that? No.
Testing and Experimenting
Hmmm! I do not want to make poetry an ego thing but I do want to test myself to see if I can consciously use this mind of mine to polish off that which comes through me....to make it better (or what I believe will be better in the eyes of teh critics...but I really don't know what that would be lol). I want to learn the art of creating image and feeling with words like the greats have done.
So I am not going to give in to Redeemer's wish to call myself a poet at this point, just an experimenter. I am going to give it a try to spruce up a poem, just to see what happens when I do.
As an experiment in learning to create unique images...I will use my mind, drive into that abyss and highlight all the things I am going to rework in the last poem I plopped out here. Then I will go back to each highlighted piece and ponder over it for a minute to see what happens inside me and what clearer image or emotional expression I come up with. I am not going to force anything ...just going to open up to what is inside my critical mind as well as inside my non-critical heart.
We will see.
Sunflowers
I think of sunflowers,
bending gracefully in the breeze,
their big beautiful heads
vibrant and reassuring
offered up
so cheerfully
to the fluttering
and humming Life
that passes by.
I think of the large strong stalks
that hold them up
so easily
and through which
their Life force flows.
I see their broad leafs
in my mind's eye...
extended outwardly,
ceaselessly asking
for more and more
of what is needed to
allow their big giant flowers
to flourish and grow,
accepting
with shameless gratitude
nature's ever giving
bounty.
I imagine the roots,
I can not see,
extended deep below
the top soil
....
stretching and reaching out,
trusting without sight,
latching on
to mother' earths
mammary glands
and nursing freely from
the loving Source
of all that is.
I find comfort in this image.
I find myself relaxing
and letting go
into the breeze of my own
little existence,
supported and fed by this body
that holds me upright,
reaching out and asking
for what is needed
to sustain me,
feeling but getting past
my shame of needing;
and slowly,
ever so slowly learning
to appreciate all that
lands on my
outstretched appendages,
transforming it all
into what will help me grow
and expand up into the sky.
Though I can not yet
see my own roots,
...
I imagine them there
extending
and reaching out
to the Source of everything.
I let go and do my best
to trust that
this connection
will sustain me.
Like the sunflowers,
I am free.
-George Orwell
I have not really drove my mind anywhere near the place where the Great Poets hang out. The question is, should I be driving a little more?
Not a Poet
I am not a poet. I am just someone who writes poetry...heck...I really do not write it at this point. I really just allow it to come out. I am fully aware...in the eyes of the poetically wise who judge and evaluate ...some poems that come out here would basically just "suck!"
I mean I love poetry and have studied it at the university level. I have a gut reaction to certain poems and at the same time I have a mind that analyzes and judges the merit of a poem on "how well it is written". I don't do that with my poems and I do not put them out there to be judged...just read. I really don't see them as "mine", just something that comes through me. I am not really, consciously at least, behind the wheel.
Do I Want to Be Seen as a Poet?
I guess, I do not want to interfere with this "me" less function. It is just pretty cool to allow it and observe it happening. Yet, at the same time I recently have this pull to do up chapbooks and get them out there. This pull to be published does not make sense being that I see myself as more of a "plopper -downer", than a poet, like the ones I have studied.
I usually just plop the poem down if it comes out here and leave it the way it is with maybe a few minor tweaks here and there, if I notice anything especially glaring...but I don't necessarily work the poem. I feel like more of a transcriptionist than a poet lol.
The question arises: Do I want to see myself and be seen as a poet? And if I do...is that a higher level motivation or a lower level?
Either way, to elevate myself into the poet status...I need to "drive the mind into the abyss" and start working the poems that just "come-out". Do I want to drive?
Do I want to get behind the wheel?
If I do that, am I interfering with something greater than ego desire? I question: If it was something higher coming through me...why would it come out so imperfectly? Or are they perfectly imperfect...the way it was intended?
What is my real role here? Am I to use this mind I have been given and drive into the place a so called poet goes? Am I to tweak these poems/ I look at this one I posted yesterday, for example, and say..."Wow! That isn't great!" Should I try to make it better...and if so, at whose judgment will "better" be?
Not that it has to be great or good even...but maybe it can be better than what it is...maybe I can learn to be a poet, rather than just someone who spits words embarrassingly out on the page when someone or something pushes a button at my core. right now, I am kind of like a verbal Pez container. Maybe , instead, I can actually use the mind I have been given to spruce the few lines that get splattered on the page up to make them "real " poems. Would that be helpful or would it be getting in the way of a natural creative process?
Why or why not would I work a poem?
Redeemer Ego likes the idea of me working the poems to meet some "other approved status." It likes the idea of me being recognized as a "real poet"...having another label to hide the holes and cracks appearing everywhere lately.
To do so, I must slip back into judging what comes out here in terms of good or bad. Redeemer would like to take responsibility and credit for whatever comes out of me if it is considered "good" by others standards and blame someone or something else if it is "bad" . It thinks of "my" reputation, how "I" appear. It wants "me" noticed so it is willing to put effort into repairing "my" image . "Maybe if you tweak this poem," it says. "You might get recognized as a poet."
Do I want to appease Redeemer ego...mine or others for the sake of another label I can place on my cracked exterior? No !
Besides:
"What if I fail?" Shamer ego pops up, "What if I can't make them better with my prepping and preening? What if I make them worse? At least when I just plop them down...there is no pressure to create something reader worthy...it really isn't about me at all. I am just an opening to something within. It is not a job...I am simply like the canister of a Bic Pen that allows the ink to come out when someone clicks the top. I do not need to put any effort into or be blamed for what comes out.
If I consciously work it, I will have to take responsibility for the less than good poetry. " Am I ready for that? No.
Testing and Experimenting
Hmmm! I do not want to make poetry an ego thing but I do want to test myself to see if I can consciously use this mind of mine to polish off that which comes through me....to make it better (or what I believe will be better in the eyes of teh critics...but I really don't know what that would be lol). I want to learn the art of creating image and feeling with words like the greats have done.
So I am not going to give in to Redeemer's wish to call myself a poet at this point, just an experimenter. I am going to give it a try to spruce up a poem, just to see what happens when I do.
As an experiment in learning to create unique images...I will use my mind, drive into that abyss and highlight all the things I am going to rework in the last poem I plopped out here. Then I will go back to each highlighted piece and ponder over it for a minute to see what happens inside me and what clearer image or emotional expression I come up with. I am not going to force anything ...just going to open up to what is inside my critical mind as well as inside my non-critical heart.
We will see.
Sunflowers
I think of sunflowers,
bending gracefully in the breeze,
their big beautiful heads
vibrant and reassuring
offered up
so cheerfully
to the fluttering
and humming Life
that passes by.
I think of the large strong stalks
that hold them up
so easily
and through which
their Life force flows.
I see their broad leafs
in my mind's eye...
extended outwardly,
ceaselessly asking
for more and more
of what is needed to
allow their big giant flowers
to flourish and grow,
accepting
with shameless gratitude
nature's ever giving
bounty.
I imagine the roots,
I can not see,
extended deep below
the top soil
....
stretching and reaching out,
trusting without sight,
latching on
to mother' earths
mammary glands
and nursing freely from
the loving Source
of all that is.
I find comfort in this image.
I find myself relaxing
and letting go
into the breeze of my own
little existence,
supported and fed by this body
that holds me upright,
reaching out and asking
for what is needed
to sustain me,
feeling but getting past
my shame of needing;
and slowly,
ever so slowly learning
to appreciate all that
lands on my
outstretched appendages,
transforming it all
into what will help me grow
and expand up into the sky.
Though I can not yet
see my own roots,
...
I imagine them there
extending
and reaching out
to the Source of everything.
I let go and do my best
to trust that
this connection
will sustain me.
Like the sunflowers,
I am free.
© Dale-Lyn (Pen) July, 2020
Reworked. The analysis.
1. bending gracefully in the breeze: Thinking of a happy, cheerful ballerina...a scene from swan lake maybe...so nothing comes up rather than bending gracefully...maybe rather than "in the breeze"...I could say "in the arms of breeze"...that gets too wordy? ...go back to original supported by the wind?
2. big beautiful heads? I want to indicate head in there and that it is" big" ...that is what we first notice about a sunflower, isn't it?...that is what I see when I think of sunflowers...but "big head" is not very poetic is it lol.? ..if we are talking "swan Lake" style we might want to use the image of a crowned head? "Large majestic head?", " Great, yellow crowned head"?..." great majestic head crowned with rays of sun"???
3. large strong stalks: Hmm...that is what they are but in reference to the ballerina image...we may take it a bit further and say "long strong torsos that hold them up and make them tall"
4. allow their big beautiful flowers to flourish and grow. Repeated image ...what if I say "beings" ? Do we grow before we flourish? What about dance?
5. first ..... Keeping with the body scan of the ballerina we probably should add the crucial element...the pointed toe? "like elegant, pointed toes"?
6. latching on to all that is? okay...now I am branching off into another metaphor all together...lets keep with the ballerina? "delicately connecting and spinning into all that is"
7. then remove part about the latching on
8. I find comfort in this image...simple, to the point...may balance the complexity of the other images...or I could say, " I breathe and settle into this comforting image."
9. period after "upright" to break up this long winded sentence. I don't think we should ever have to take more than a breath to read a sentence in poetic verse.
10. "Reaching out my trembling limbs I ask for what is needed to sustain me."
11. What about instead of "feeling"..."blushing but getting past my shame of needing"
12. remove "it"
13. "stretch and lengthen into my celestial home within the sky"...yoga terminology for upward sweep lol
14. next ....: have to get back to ballerina...keep that image going..."my own tattered and worn point shoes" to indicate years of trying and practice?
15.to trust the connection... "I let go and do my best to trust the flow and rhythm of nature's dance"?
16, "allowing the music of Life to sustain me so, like the dancing sunflower, I am freed."
17. Because there is so much reference to a ballerina...we should make this "Dancing sunflower"?
Okay Let's Put it together:
Dancing Sunflowers
I think of sunflowers,
bending gracefully
in the arms of breeze.
Their great majestic heads,
crowned with rays of sun
vibrant and reassuring,
offered up
so cheerfully
to the fluttering
and humming Life
that passes by.
I think of their long
strong torsos
that hold them up
and make them tall,
through which
their Life force flows.
I see their broad leafs,
in my mind's eye...
extended outwardly,
ceaselessly asking
for more and more
of what is needed to
allow their beings
to grow and flourish
and dance,
accepting
with shameless gratitude
nature's ever giving
bounty.
I imagine the roots,
I can not see,
extended deep below
the top soil
like elegant, pointed toes,
trusting without sight,
while delicately connecting
and
spinning into all that is.
I breathe and settle
into this comforting image.
I find myself relaxing
and letting go
into the breeze of my own
little existence,
supported and fed by this body
that holds me upright.
Reaching out
my trembling limbs
I ask
for what is needed
to sustain me.
Blushing,
but getting past
my shame of needing;
I slowly,
ever so slowly,
learn
to appreciate all that
lands on my
outstretched appendages,
trusting all
will be transformed
into that which will
help me
stretch and lengthen
towards my celestial home
within the sky.
Though I can not yet
see my own roots,
my own tattered and worn
point shoes,
I imagine them there
extending
and reaching out
to the Source of everything.
I let go and do my best
to trust the
perfect flow and rhythm of
of nature's dance.
Allowing the music of Life
to open me up,
like
the dancing sunflower,
I am freed.
Reworked. The analysis.
1. bending gracefully in the breeze: Thinking of a happy, cheerful ballerina...a scene from swan lake maybe...so nothing comes up rather than bending gracefully...maybe rather than "in the breeze"...I could say "in the arms of breeze"...that gets too wordy? ...go back to original supported by the wind?
2. big beautiful heads? I want to indicate head in there and that it is" big" ...that is what we first notice about a sunflower, isn't it?...that is what I see when I think of sunflowers...but "big head" is not very poetic is it lol.? ..if we are talking "swan Lake" style we might want to use the image of a crowned head? "Large majestic head?", " Great, yellow crowned head"?..." great majestic head crowned with rays of sun"???
3. large strong stalks: Hmm...that is what they are but in reference to the ballerina image...we may take it a bit further and say "long strong torsos that hold them up and make them tall"
4. allow their big beautiful flowers to flourish and grow. Repeated image ...what if I say "beings" ? Do we grow before we flourish? What about dance?
5. first ..... Keeping with the body scan of the ballerina we probably should add the crucial element...the pointed toe? "like elegant, pointed toes"?
6. latching on to all that is? okay...now I am branching off into another metaphor all together...lets keep with the ballerina? "delicately connecting and spinning into all that is"
7. then remove part about the latching on
8. I find comfort in this image...simple, to the point...may balance the complexity of the other images...or I could say, " I breathe and settle into this comforting image."
9. period after "upright" to break up this long winded sentence. I don't think we should ever have to take more than a breath to read a sentence in poetic verse.
10. "Reaching out my trembling limbs I ask for what is needed to sustain me."
11. What about instead of "feeling"..."blushing but getting past my shame of needing"
12. remove "it"
13. "stretch and lengthen into my celestial home within the sky"...yoga terminology for upward sweep lol
14. next ....: have to get back to ballerina...keep that image going..."my own tattered and worn point shoes" to indicate years of trying and practice?
15.to trust the connection... "I let go and do my best to trust the flow and rhythm of nature's dance"?
16, "allowing the music of Life to sustain me so, like the dancing sunflower, I am freed."
17. Because there is so much reference to a ballerina...we should make this "Dancing sunflower"?
Okay Let's Put it together:
I think of sunflowers,
bending gracefully
Their great majestic heads,
vibrant and reassuring,
offered up
so cheerfully
to the fluttering
and humming Life
that passes by.
I think of their long
through which
their Life force flows.
I see their broad leafs,
in my mind's eye...
extended outwardly,
ceaselessly asking
for more and more
of what is needed to
allow their beings
to grow and flourish
accepting
with shameless gratitude
nature's ever giving
bounty.
I imagine the roots,
I can not see,
extended deep below
the top soil
I breathe and
I find myself relaxing
and letting go
into the breeze of my own
little existence,
supported and fed by this body
that holds me upright.
Reaching out
for what is needed
to sustain me.
Blushing,
my shame of needing;
I slowly,
ever so slowly,
to appreciate all that
lands on my
outstretched appendages,
trusting all
into that which will
within the sky.
Though I can not yet
see my own roots,
I imagine them there
extending
and reaching out
to the Source of everything.
I let go and do my best
to trust the
© Dale-Lyn, July 2020
Hmmm! I wonder which one is better and better to whom or what?
All is well.
All is well.
Friday, July 10, 2020
Respond...
Watch your thoughts; they become your words;
watch your words, they become your actions;
watch your actions, they become your habits;
watch your habits, they become your character;
watch your character, that becomes your destiny.
Lao Tzu ?
I am not sure for certain that Lao Tzu said this...I have studied the Tao Te Ching but do not know which verse or translation they come from. But it sounds like something he would say lol and many sources credit these words to him.
Anyway, I was reminded of them during another fantastic dharma talk by Tara Brach. (I really, really like her teachings.) And because I was thinking about "thinking" lol and more specifically our propensity to go negative and what that does to the version of reality we experience.
The last two dharma talks I listened to from Tara Brach have come to me at the precise moment I seemed to need them, helping me deal with an issue in my life. Helping me to respond rather than react.
The Programming and Core Beliefs
In my programming, my store consciousness, my conditioning, the memory center of my brain (hippocampus) are core beliefs. These beliefs are triggered and become further ingrained in my mind as "truth" because of past experiences. One of the core beliefs I have is that "Drugs and addiction, like some social and rampant curse, are everywhere and I need to protect my children from them. They are all so vulnerable . " And believe me... I have had plenty of circumstantial evidence to convince me that this was true. Whether my fear driven belief actually led to the manifestation of the evidence, or the evidence before me led to the manifestation of the belief is still not 100% clear. I am learning to lean more toward the idea that our thoughts create our reality.
I recently had another activation of this core belief which led to intense fear, worry, anger and this reactive mode of judging, assuming, and fighting off the "evil" doers or influences. I reacted big time. It started as a little thought leading to a little fear and built into a full reactive mode of thinking, feeling and behaving in a way that I knew was not helpful. I once again, found myself rocking back and forth in the rocker all night, as I have spent many nights as a mother doing over the years.
I would see some possible "evidence" and I would fly off into reactivity.
Certain individuals entered my home, through someone who knew someone who knew my loved one. I had the strongest "Mama Bear" sense they were seasoned addicts with an ulterior motive, seeking a place to hide out. What was even worse, they were from out of province and though I was assured by someone that they had already completed their two week self isolation, something within told me they didn't! I saw these individuals, I didn't know, as the "enemy" and I wanted them out of my home! I made it clear. They came in again, after we were thought to be in bed, even after I said no more. I felt my mind spinning ...fear, anger, resentment, worry, confusion. The emotions would have been okay on their own, passing through me in about one and half minutes, but my core belief, now activated, kept feeding them...making the reaction stronger and stronger.
Because everything seemed to be done so secretively and suspiciously, I seen my loved one at the center of some addiction spiral, out of control, fed by these individuals who I assumed were probably hiding out from the police. I built this tremendous story up based on this gut feeling I had and the strange behaviour of the visitors who showed up. You see I do have a strong intuitive sense especially when it comes to things like this...but I couldn't tell which was gut and which was pure egoic reactivity. I couldn't tell if I was seeing through the eyes of gifted insight from the higher Self, or from a place of fear based memory and conditioning in the lower self. All I knew was that every hair on the back of my neck was up and I was in fight mode.
Responding in a Loving, Healthy Way
I knew in order to handle this situation from a place of responding rather than reacting, a place of Love rather than fear, I had to be able to step back and create space between my thinking and myself. So that is what I did. And thanks to Tara Brach's video I was able to stop the "sub cortical looping" to a great degree.
Steps to Responding
Firstly, I asked myself to stop believing what my mind and my physiological reaction was telling me. I had to realize that though there was probably some truth in what I was thinking...a great deal of it was brought on by stored memory of past situations with others. The fear I was experiencing could have been a result of old triggers just as much as from what I was witnessing in the present situation. I don't have to believe all my thoughts.
Secondly, I asked myself for permission to "stop" acting so I could pause and just feel what was happening in my body and in my moment. I was indeed too uptight to do anything responsively rather than reactively. So I breathed. I meditated. I brought myself down and into the spacious non-judging place where there is no "evil doers", just unconscious, lost and suffering individuals who needed and deserved my kindness and compassion more so than my judgment and the war I was starting against them.
Thirdly, I intentionally felt compassion for myself for going there..(.I certainly have some legitimate experience in this area and the circumstances were strange) and I had compassion for all involved. The feeling/thought stream that the behaviour was dangerous, that drugs and some breech in social consciousness was taking place did not go away...but with the compassion and kindness story becoming louder than the fear story...I was able to relax into a space between it and me. I felt myself able to respond rather than react.
Oh man...this compassion place is a much better place to be in than the fearful closed up reaction place ego tends to take us. I see more clearly now and am inspired to take the next "productive" steps necessary. Hmm.
Post Note: after taking the next step of opening communication around the subject, I realize my mind once again created a story with only a tad of reality in it lol. It was mostly F> false E>evidence A>appearing R>real.
Moral of this story..."Please don't believe everything your mind tells you." lol
All is well!
Tara Brach (Sept, 2015) Learning to Respond not React. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ymPF0q7U5oM
watch your words, they become your actions;
watch your actions, they become your habits;
watch your habits, they become your character;
watch your character, that becomes your destiny.
Lao Tzu ?
I am not sure for certain that Lao Tzu said this...I have studied the Tao Te Ching but do not know which verse or translation they come from. But it sounds like something he would say lol and many sources credit these words to him.
Anyway, I was reminded of them during another fantastic dharma talk by Tara Brach. (I really, really like her teachings.) And because I was thinking about "thinking" lol and more specifically our propensity to go negative and what that does to the version of reality we experience.
The last two dharma talks I listened to from Tara Brach have come to me at the precise moment I seemed to need them, helping me deal with an issue in my life. Helping me to respond rather than react.
The Programming and Core Beliefs
In my programming, my store consciousness, my conditioning, the memory center of my brain (hippocampus) are core beliefs. These beliefs are triggered and become further ingrained in my mind as "truth" because of past experiences. One of the core beliefs I have is that "Drugs and addiction, like some social and rampant curse, are everywhere and I need to protect my children from them. They are all so vulnerable . " And believe me... I have had plenty of circumstantial evidence to convince me that this was true. Whether my fear driven belief actually led to the manifestation of the evidence, or the evidence before me led to the manifestation of the belief is still not 100% clear. I am learning to lean more toward the idea that our thoughts create our reality.
I recently had another activation of this core belief which led to intense fear, worry, anger and this reactive mode of judging, assuming, and fighting off the "evil" doers or influences. I reacted big time. It started as a little thought leading to a little fear and built into a full reactive mode of thinking, feeling and behaving in a way that I knew was not helpful. I once again, found myself rocking back and forth in the rocker all night, as I have spent many nights as a mother doing over the years.
I would see some possible "evidence" and I would fly off into reactivity.
Certain individuals entered my home, through someone who knew someone who knew my loved one. I had the strongest "Mama Bear" sense they were seasoned addicts with an ulterior motive, seeking a place to hide out. What was even worse, they were from out of province and though I was assured by someone that they had already completed their two week self isolation, something within told me they didn't! I saw these individuals, I didn't know, as the "enemy" and I wanted them out of my home! I made it clear. They came in again, after we were thought to be in bed, even after I said no more. I felt my mind spinning ...fear, anger, resentment, worry, confusion. The emotions would have been okay on their own, passing through me in about one and half minutes, but my core belief, now activated, kept feeding them...making the reaction stronger and stronger.
Because everything seemed to be done so secretively and suspiciously, I seen my loved one at the center of some addiction spiral, out of control, fed by these individuals who I assumed were probably hiding out from the police. I built this tremendous story up based on this gut feeling I had and the strange behaviour of the visitors who showed up. You see I do have a strong intuitive sense especially when it comes to things like this...but I couldn't tell which was gut and which was pure egoic reactivity. I couldn't tell if I was seeing through the eyes of gifted insight from the higher Self, or from a place of fear based memory and conditioning in the lower self. All I knew was that every hair on the back of my neck was up and I was in fight mode.
Responding in a Loving, Healthy Way
I knew in order to handle this situation from a place of responding rather than reacting, a place of Love rather than fear, I had to be able to step back and create space between my thinking and myself. So that is what I did. And thanks to Tara Brach's video I was able to stop the "sub cortical looping" to a great degree.
Steps to Responding
Firstly, I asked myself to stop believing what my mind and my physiological reaction was telling me. I had to realize that though there was probably some truth in what I was thinking...a great deal of it was brought on by stored memory of past situations with others. The fear I was experiencing could have been a result of old triggers just as much as from what I was witnessing in the present situation. I don't have to believe all my thoughts.
Secondly, I asked myself for permission to "stop" acting so I could pause and just feel what was happening in my body and in my moment. I was indeed too uptight to do anything responsively rather than reactively. So I breathed. I meditated. I brought myself down and into the spacious non-judging place where there is no "evil doers", just unconscious, lost and suffering individuals who needed and deserved my kindness and compassion more so than my judgment and the war I was starting against them.
Thirdly, I intentionally felt compassion for myself for going there..(.I certainly have some legitimate experience in this area and the circumstances were strange) and I had compassion for all involved. The feeling/thought stream that the behaviour was dangerous, that drugs and some breech in social consciousness was taking place did not go away...but with the compassion and kindness story becoming louder than the fear story...I was able to relax into a space between it and me. I felt myself able to respond rather than react.
Oh man...this compassion place is a much better place to be in than the fearful closed up reaction place ego tends to take us. I see more clearly now and am inspired to take the next "productive" steps necessary. Hmm.
Post Note: after taking the next step of opening communication around the subject, I realize my mind once again created a story with only a tad of reality in it lol. It was mostly F> false E>evidence A>appearing R>real.
Moral of this story..."Please don't believe everything your mind tells you." lol
All is well!
Tara Brach (Sept, 2015) Learning to Respond not React. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ymPF0q7U5oM
Sunflowers -First Draft
Sunflowers
I think of sunflowers,
bending gracefully in the breeze,
their big beautiful heads
vibrant and reassuring
offered up
so cheerfully
to the fluttering
and humming Life
that passes by.
I think of the large strong stalks
that hold them up
so easily
and through which
their Life force flows.
I see their broad leafs
in my mind's eye...
extended outwardly,
ceaselessly asking
for more and more
of what is needed to
allow their big giant flowers
to flourish and grow,
accepting
with shameless gratitude
nature's ever giving
bounty.
I imagine the roots,
I can not see,
extended deep below
the top soil
stretching and reaching out,
trusting without sight,
latching on
to mother' earths
mammary glands
and nursing freely from
the loving Source
of all that is.
I find comfort in this image.
I find myself relaxing
and letting go
into the breeze of my own
little existence,
supported and fed by this body
that holds me upright,
reaching out and asking
for what is needed
to sustain me,
feeling but getting past
my shame of needing;
and slowly,
ever so slowly learning
to appreciate all that
lands on my
outstretched appendages,
transforming it
into what will help me grow
and expand up into the sky.
Though I can not yet
see my own roots,
I imagine them there
extending
and reaching out
to the Source of everything.
I let go and do my best
to trust that
this connection
will sustain me.
Like the sunflowers,
I am free.
© Dale-Lyn (Pen) July, 2020
Thursday, July 9, 2020
Door
Andersen, Uell S.. Three Magic Words . BN Publishing. Kindle Edition.
Technically, not a great shot but it reveals that a door between specie understanding is opening.
All is well.
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